Lie To Me
by Jelly Bean Jenna
Summary: Sam & Andy meet, but not as we all know. Sam's robbing banks and running drugs & guns. Andy just happens gets in the way, and has to now trust a stranger to keep her safe, while Sam's trying to figure out why he put everything on the line for a doe-eyed rookie cop. AU! Nominated for 6 Rookie Blue Choice Awards 2013!
1. Chapter 1

**Summery: Sam & Andy meet, but not as we all know. Sam's robbing banks and running drugs & guns. Andy just happens gets in the way, and has to now trust a stranger to keep her safe, while Sam's trying to figure out why he put everything on the line for a doe-eyed rookie cop. AU!**

**Thanks for all the awesome reviews & follows on Blurry Lines. Hope you'll enjoy this one too!**

**This is a tester chapter, so review and let me know what you think!**

**To the #RBFG's on Twitter- you guys totally rock!**

**As always thanks to the regulars & Kelly2727 & the Rookie Blue South Africa Page on Facebook, for being so awesome!**

**Chapter 1. **

From the moment he opened his eyes this morning, he just knew that today was going to be a bad day.

It started with a hangover that made his head feel like it was splitting in half, then Tony was reported missing- only for them to discover that he had been arrested last night, so he was still sleeping it off in a holding cell.

So now, they were one guy down, which meant that he would be doing a little more on today's job.

When he really wasn't in the mood.

Everything for this had been planned for weeks, one big score to get them the home run they had been working for; for weeks now.

This was their break into the big time, the push that would set them up at the top, where the big boys ran.

Pulling on the ski-mask, he adjusted it so that his vision was not obscure by the tiny holes, his lips just barely visible through the small slit. Whoever made these things probably never intended for them to be used for this purpose.

"Hey Sammy, ready?". Damian called out.

Damian was like a pitbull, even looked like one with his shaved head and tattoos and eyebrow piercing.

"Yup". Came Sammy's dry reply, it was now or never.

"Soooo, we gonna hit the Penny tonight?". Traci asked in a giggle of excitement, a twinkle in her eye.

It told Andy that she was hoping to 'bump' into Detective Barber at the Penny. Traci had a serious thing for the guy.

"No". Andy tried to keep her face as straight as possible, Traci's face immediately locked in a look of disappointment.

"I'm kidding". Andy giggled out after her heart couldn't bare to watch Traci pout anymore.

Shift was slow, they were patrolling down town, in the cold. Winter had settled in and it was usually a busy time of year, but today accidents were scare even though it was snowing, and ther roads were slippery.

"Just think, in two weeks, you won't have to sneak around anymore" Andy suddenly blurted out winking at Traci as she turned the cruiser left as the traffic light turned orange.

_"You know?"._ Traci shrieked out, her eyes widening at Andy's statement.

"Trace, _everybody_ knows" Andy said brandishing a sweet smile.

Traci and Detective Barber had been seeing each other since the academy, but kept it very quiet because it was seriously frowned upon to be involved with a rookie on training, and for now that's what they were.

They were Rookies.

In two weeks they would be cut loose, their rookie status would fall away, and they would be cops.

Officially.

And then Traci and Detective Barber wouldn't have to sneak around anymore.

It was Saturday so it probably explained why their shift had stayed quiet right up until lunch time. They had stopped for coffee and lunch at a diner in the middle of town, the place served the best coffee so if they were in the neighborhood, they never missed the opportunity to stop for one.

Making their way back out to the cruiser, a call came in, a silent alarm at a bank a block down from them had been triggered, and it was closing time.

Andy started the ignition and Traci radioed in that they were a block away and responding.

Damian heard the sirens, they were close. Really close.

He barked orders to wrap it up and leave, grabbing a little boy from his mothers arm's as he passed them on the way out.

The mother tried to hang on to her son, but a gun in her face and Damian's gun against the kids head made her screams die down as she lay back down on the tiled floor sobbing instead.

Just like he yelled that she should.

Damian pulled the kid all the way out the door and onto the pavement outside the bank, two guns drawn and pointing at them.

Sammy followed, handling a bag of the cash, then Scott, Bobby and Elliot.

"Let the kid go". The driver of the cruiser yelled to them as Damian began walking towards the waiting car a few feet away. He knew two female officers wouldn't shoot when he was holding onto a kid, so he let out a loud laugh and yanked the kid by the collar as he pushed him towards the car.

"Stop!".

She yelled again, this time moving out behind the open cruiser door and out into the open with nothing standing between her and a bullet.

"I'll shoot the kid". Damian said in a voice so calm it made Sammy shiver. He knew he would too.

"I can't let you take him".

The cop was relentless, and still stepping closer, like she had no value to her life whatsoever.

Sammy tapped on the trunk when he reached the car and it popped open, so he lifted the lid and hoisted the bag into the back, followed by the ones Elliot and Bobby had before slamming it closed.

"If you follow, I will kill him". Damian said just as he lifted his leg to get into the passenger side of the car, Elliot being gentleman enough to open the door for him.

_"Wait!". _

The cop tilted her gun to the side before bending down and setting it on the tarmac. She stood back up with her hands held out in surrender.

"Take me".

"Andy, what are you doing?". The other woman, the one that was on the radio had spoken out loud for the first time since they had stepped outside.

"It's okay Trace. He's just a kid".

Her words had stopped Damian from getting in to the car, he now stood facing her with his cold eyes running up and down her body.

More sirens screamed through the air, their arrival minutes away.

"Let him go... take me". This time her strong, assertive voice had slipped to a scared, weaker one.

She suddenly moved her hands and dropped her duty belt to the floor by unclipping it at the front, her movements slow and precise so that they could see what she was doing, and that no threat was meant.

Her bulky jacket was next, as she shrugged it off after lifting it up at the hem and turning around so that they could see that she wasn't hiding a gun. It fell to the floor in a crumpled heap.

Her gloved hands faltered when they moved to the velcro straps of her vest. They hesitated for a second, before she ripped them loose and dropped it on top of her jacket where it lay on the floor.

_"Andy!"._ Her partner seemed really worried for her.

The brave one turned around slowly, her hands held high. Her face was hard and strong, but her eyes showed her weakness.

"Sammy". Damian called out nodding over to the cop, telling him what he had to do without saying actual words.

Andy noted the one standing behind the car moving around it and towards her, making her feel intimidated.

He took her by the hand and pulled her to the side of the waiting getaway car, spun her around and shoved her into the back door, hoisting her hands up on to the roof.

His hands were meticulous in their pat down, he knew how to do it, he'd had it done to him many times.

After that he didn't say a word, just nodded towards the one barking the orders who then waved her over with the gun.

In one swift movement, the kid was pushed forwards, sent sprawling on his hands and knees, skidding across the tar, while the arm that shoved him flew around her neck and pulled her backwards in one fluid motion.

"I will kill her of I see a squad car. Do you understand?".

The other cop nodded silently as she stepped out behind her door and caught the kid as he was running to her in a fit of tears. He was old enough to understand that he came so close to dying or being shot that it had scared him.

The back door was suddenly opened and Andy was shoved in, someone already sitting next to the other door.

Everything was happening at warp speed, that she was losing minor details along the way.

His hands hoisted her up as soon as she slid across the seat closer to him, as he neatly deposited her in his lap. His sudden movements caused her head to hit the roof as she let out a yelp in fright. She turned to glare at him, her eyes flashing a split second of fire before it dimmed to be replaced by tormented fear.

She recoiled away from his touch, leaning as far sideways as she could, trying to put space between him and herself by sinking into the back of the drivers seat.

Andy had no idea what she was doing.

But he was just a kid, and everytime she had looked at his scared face, she saw Leo's face instead. She could hear his mother screaming from inside the bank, and that was something she never wanted to see Traci go through, so why should she let it be someone else?

These guys were smooth, they knew what they were doing and she didn't think for one second that they wouldn't harm the kid.

They were in the middle of the city, if they drove off with the kid they would probably shove him out of the back of the car and into the road while driving, or they would just dump his body somewhere after putting a gun to his head and pulling the trigger.

They wouldn't want lose ends, and that is what the kid would become.

A lose end.

So this was how it had to happen, what had to be done.

The other two guys bungled into the back next to them, the door slammed and the car lurched forwards with spinning tires.

Sammy was fuming right now, so furious that he had to restrain his hands from moving up to her neck and strangling her.

She should have left it alone, stayed away. He would have defused the situation and made Damian see sense and drop the kid off a few blocks away.

Nobody would have been hurt.

Now he has a cop sitting on his lap and Damian eyeing her through the rear view mirror from the passenger seat like she was something to eat.

As if reading his mind Damian's eyes found his before he suddenly turned to face him.

Damian's hand was holding out handcuffs and a strip of a torn T-shirt so Sammy reached out and took the items before setting them down in her lap.

"Hands". His tone was dangerously low, and that was good because she lifted them up and held them together knowing exactly what he was about to do.

He clipped the cuffs on and yanked on them making sure that they were secure before his hand reached for the material, another timid groan leaving her lips as he caused the metal cuffs to chafe her skinny wrists when he jerked them.

He lifted his arm's up and drew the material to her face, her eyes seeking out his for a split second before his hand moved to turn her face away. The material was strung over her eyes and tied at the back of her head, in a double knot to hold it in place.

He could smell her shampoo as her ponytail shook in his face, a whimper escaping her as she was plunged into darkness.

She was shivering, her eyes pleading not to be covered when she turned to face him, but he had too. She couldn't see where they were going.

He wondered briefly if she was cold and shaking or scared and trembling. Or a combination of both. It was winter and she had discarded her jacket as a sign of good faith...stupidly.

He tugged her a little closer in a bid to try and keep her warm, her body tensing into a frigid statue as she felt his chest against her side and shoulder. His actions caused her to tremble a little more, telling him that she was scared...no petrified.

But that was a good thing, because right now that would be the only thing that kept her alive.

*******Thanks for reading, leave a review and let me know what u think?**

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	2. My Little Gift

**Wow, okay, so it seems you guys like this; so thank you for all the awesome reviews & follows. **

**Thanks to the regulars, Kelly2727 & welcome to the newbies! **

**Would you believe that this idea comed from a conversation I had with my Mother?. So thanks to my Mom too! **

**I've got the best mom in the world (just don't tell her I said that lol)**

**Chapter 2- My Little Gift. **

The bumps in the road made her head knock against the roof of the car more times than she could keep count of, her neck straining and cramping as they drove for miles and miles.

She wasn't as cold anymore, the interior of the car and all its passengers soon warming up in its cramped space.

She had no clue where they were going, but the longer the drive the longer she'd be safe, so she was happy for the extended travel time.

The car slowed down and turned, gravel under it's tires making the fear well inside her as she began to panic. They were probably taking her into the woods outside of town; to dispose of her.

After driving a little further the car stopped, suddenly, so she was thrown back into the guy she was sitting on. Everytime she had tried to pull away, he had pulled her back, a growl eventually sounding in her ear that told her to sit still, so she eventually stopped pulling away.

Andy heard the doors open and a hand latched on to her cuffs as the man under her hoisted her off his lap and set her back down on to the seat, the hand on the cuffs pulling her hands until her legs found the door. She stumbled out the car and onto her feet, her legs unwilling to co-operate as they wobbled.

She was being pulled again, her feet taking hesitant steps in the dark, so that she wouldn't fall until her hands were suddenly dropped and she froze.

This was it, her final breath. So she inhaled deeply and held it, waiting for the resounding echo of the gunshot that would be her untimely demise.

But it never came?

She heard the scrunch of the gravel under shoes as they moved around her, and a door open?

Where the hell were they?

"Sammy". The obvious leader of the pack called out really close to her ear. His voice made a cold chill run down her spine.

"Boss?".

"Here...". A hand suddenly shoved Andy, and just when she thought she was about to hit the ground, hands wrapped around her and steadied her as she stumbled.

"Boss?".

"She's yours".

The scrunch of gravel grew softer as the footsteps walked away.

Sudden panic coursed through her every fiber as realization set in.

This was so bad.

A hand wrapped around her upper arm as whichever one Sammy was walked and tugged her along, her feet refusing to work as they dug into the gravel in a bid to try and keep her where she was.

He pulled and she pulled back, trying to prolong the inevitable.

"Aarrgg". The growl sounded just to her left, sounding exactly the same as the one that had been in her ear in the car. It was the guy that she sat on, the one with the warm eyes.

As she attempted to keep a strong face, she felt his hands move around her waist, then she was scooped up and slung over his shoulder, his feet walking with determined strides.

His shoes bit into the gravel before they hit hardwood, it felt like they were climbing stairs.

She heard the sound of whispered voices, more than maybe three, one of them...female?

Andy was carried up a longer flight of stairs, or maybe down them; she wasn't sure, when she heard a door really close to them open.

That's when the adrenaline wore off and the panic seeped into her.

She started hitting his back with her hands fisted together, her legs kicking idly as she tried to free herself.

But he was too strong, and just tightened his grip on her, her futile attempts to break free just that - futile.

So she bit him. Hard.

The second her teeth sunk into the flesh through his shirt, he froze, a string of f-bombs flying out his mouth.

A sudden sting made it's presence known across her backside as he smacked her so hard that her eyes welled with a few more tears than they already had in them.

A screeched _"Oooww"_ tossed from her lips.

She heard the door slam closed, her feisty fire raging as she resumed her assault on him in an attempt to escape.

The stranger shifted her around, then she was falling before she bounced on a soft surface that she knew was a bed.

Her hands were yanked above her head, a key slipping into the handcuffs and loosening one side before it was snapped closed again, her one arm hanging suspended in the air, the other stagnant at her side, paralyzed in fear.

Her blindfold was suddenly ripped from her face, the bright light from the ceiling lights causing her eyes to slam closed in revolt to its harshness.

Her captor was hovering over her, his face still obscured from view by the ski-mask when she opened her eyes. He was just staring at her with those big, warm eyes.

But they were blazing.

His hand moved up so fast that she cringed, visibly, thinking that it was moving towards her.

He shrank back, his hand finding its way to the top of the ski-mask before ripping it off.

His face was hard, a strong jaw line with a tense jaw taking her immediate attention.

His eyes turned from a rich brown, to a hollow black as he leaned closer. He was so close that she could feel the heat radiating off his face, smell the musky mint of gum on his breath as he whispered out harsh words.

"Do that again, and you will get the hiding of your life"

He moved like lightning, stalking out of the room, the door slamming again on his departure.

The sound of a key in the lock told her that he was locking her in, or locking the door to keep someone out.

Sammy found the guys in the lounge, cash strewn over the table as Bobby sat counting it.

It looked like enough to get them to where they needed to be, so hoping that nothing else went wrong anytime soon, Sammy would be out of here sooner than he thought.

"You not testing the samples there Sammy?".

"Business before pleasure Scott". Sam's dry tone did little to hide his distaste for the man that just couldn't find it in himself to respect a woman.

The mark across his face was testament to that, he grabbed Bobby on her ass, and she didn't like it too much. Scott should have waited until she wasn't holding a beer bottle.

Damian came into the room handing out beers in celebration of actually pulling off the job, minus the small hitch that now lay cuffed to Sam's bedpost.

"We good?". Damian said sitting down next to Bobby as she stacked the last pile of notes to the side.

She could count cash quicker than the best banker.

"We're good, got change too". She said wearing a mega smile.

It was music to Sam's ears.

They needed enough cash to buy a shipment of cocaine coming in to the docks in three weeks, highest bidder won the prize, their only competition- every other druglord in Toronto.

The price was good, too good to miss, but they usually dealt small time, and mostly in weaponry. So when they heard the rumors that a large shipment was going for next to nothing, Damian devised a plan to come up with enough quick cash to pay the full amount to the Chinese before someone else did.

So they robbed a bank, and added it to their _'savings plan'_; now they just had to wait for the cash to be delivered when the boat docked.

Easy as pie.

Until the hard-assed, doe-eyed idiot upstairs got entangled in their perfect plan.

The cash was stashed away, and the guys made idle conversation about what they would spend their millions on when they made the big time, Sam hanging back as he stared out of the window.

"She okay?". Bobby asked as she lingered behind Sam.

"She's scared".

"I was too". She said before walking away.

Bobby had been in more or less the same position the woman upstairs was in, Damian took her from a dive bar when a fight broke out and they needed an insurance policy to get them out the door safely.

But she was different.

She had a bad life and was better off where she was now, than where she had been then.

When they pulled over to let her out of the car that night, she begged them to take her with, not to make her go back there. So Damian had relented and let her stay, making her pay her way by cooking and cleaning.

Six years later, she was still here, and now a piece of Damian's property.

Sam was surprised that the night Scott had grabbed Bobby's ass, that Damian didn't shoot him where he stood. Damian was hard. He was cold and callous, heartless. And Bobby was just... So soft and feminine. They were polar opposites.

"You should buy her something. Something nice. Make her feel better". Bobby called across the room before sitting down on Damian's lap as she mumbled about more beer and pizza.

Sam left the window and went to get a soda, his... Whatever, was probably thirsty and could do with some sugar.

As he closed the fridge, Scott was there, lurking behind the door, leering at him from his icy-blue eyes.

"Let me know if you want me to take her for a test drive". He sneered before cutting his breath off when his back slammed into the wall behind him.

"You touch her, and I will kill you".

Sam shoved him into the wall again before letting his hands fall away from the scruff of Scott's collar. He had no idea what just happened, or why he reacted that way, but those words just set him on fire.

He was usually cool, and collected, but that just made him snap.

"Sammy". Damian called after him, but he was gone, the soda picked up off the floor as he stepped over it.

******* Thanks for reading!**

**Let me know what you think in another awesome review! **

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	3. Mine

**Thank you all for thge amazing response, your awesome reviews & huge compliments!**

**Thanks to the regulars & Kelly2727!**

**Welcome to all those new names I keep seeing!**

**Chapter 3- Mine. **

Andy cautiously took in her surroundings, her vision lingering on every item in the room, her brain memorizing it all.

The room was big, really big.

Way too big for one person.

It was sparsely furnished, a huge closet built in to the wall, two chests of drawers in a corner.

A table with a flat screen TV stood in front of the bed at the foot end, two small bedside tables on either side of the bed. Both with maroon colored bedside lamps.

Then there was the bed, a wrought iron four post bed, that was so big she felt like she was only occupying a quarter of it.

The kind of bed that they had in the movies? Yup, this was one of those.

But it was comfortable, even though her arm still dangled cuffed to the bar above her head.

There were no windows, just a door a few feet away that most likely led to a bathroom.

Andy lay quietly for a few minutes listening for sounds around her, but the only sound she heard was her own breathing, and her heartbeat as it roared thunderously in her own ears.

She had scooped all the pillows in behind her back so that she could get more comfortable, the blankets tugged closer to warm her up.

She was frozen, and now that the adrenaline had completely worn off, she regretted leaving her jacket behind.

The sudden sound of the key in the door made her jump, fear edging her on to sit bolt upright, her eyes staring at the white door like it was about to pounce on her.

When it swung open, she found the tousled head of hair from earlier stepping back into the room, his jaw set tight, and shoulders tense. Even though she didn't know him, she could tell that he wasn't in a good mood.

He closed the door by shoving it closed, making Andy wince as the slam's echo reverberated off the walls.

He walked over to her and held out a can of soda, his eyes fixated on her arm cuffed to the bed.

Her hand reached out of its own accord, snatching the soda. She was thirsty, but needed the sugar more.

She swung her legs off the side of the bed, her boots clamping down on the hard wooden floor with a thump.

She checked the can, inspecting it closely, noting that it was sealed. She set it down on the bedside table, her free hand moving to pry the ring pull so that she could get to the actual contents.

Her fingernail hooked under the flimsy ring and she lifted, a sudden spray of liquid exploding out the can and hitting her in the face as it dribbled down the front of her shirt.

She let out a shrilled cry as she was drenched in sticky liquid, her eyes shooting to find her captor wearing a smug look as he tried to bite back a chuckle.

Without thinking about it, her hand grabbed the can and launched it across the room, hitting her target squarely in the chest, his face contorting to really mad.

Sam couldn't help himself, it made him smile. He forgot that he dropped the can of soda, his mind still focusing on Scott's lurid words.

But her face, it wasn't the shock he'd seen earlier, or the panicked look she had worn since they left with her, it was just a look of total exasperation.

She was having a really bad day.

When the can hit him, his hands fumbled to catch it, soda seeping out all over his clothes, the floor and his hands as he grabbed idly at the splattering liquid.

He glared at her, her face wrapped up in a look of annoyance as she glared back.

She had fire, and spunk. And he liked that.

"I um... Dropped the can". Sam said by way of explanation, her eyes narrowing as they continued to glare at him. But she didn't say anything, just smothered her hand over her face before dragging the back of her sleeve across her cheek.

Great now she was thirsty, wet, cold, scared and sticky. The worst combination she had ever experienced.

"Your Daddy a cop too _McNally_?". His words made her head snap up from her lap to his face, the way her surname rolled off his tongue making her shudder as he read her name tag.

This was bad. People like him couldn't know that she had a family at home, it would turn into leverage.

"N...No". She stammered out, trying to find her confident voice, the one she left behind when she climbed into the car with them.

"You sure? He cuffed me a couple times, DUI, possession once".

Great, now he turned out to be a lowlife that her dad had arrested a few times.

Andy didn't trust her voice, so she shook her head wildly.

Sam raised an eyebrow at her, he knew she was lying. It was written all over her face.

Without revealing that he knew the truth, Sam left the room again, going in search of something else for her to drink.

Her eyes had carelessly cast themselves over the spilled soda, she was regretting throwing it at him, she _was_ thirsty.

Andy heard the door lock again, a long breath billowing out between her lips as she felt tears prickle her eyes again.

She cursed the universe for putting her in a position to be here in the first place.

Traci was rattled.

She found the chair in interview three too uncomfortable, so she paced the room instead.

"We'll find her". Jerry said trying to convince her enough to calm her down.

"Jerry, it's been _six hours_, and we have _nothing_. Those guys were pro's. How will we find her, when we don't even know where to start?".

"We _will_ find her". He couldn't deny the fact that they had nothing. Plates on the car ran as a stolen Beamer from Michigan, not the dark blue sedan they were driving. They had no prints, no DNA, no evidence, except that only one guy spoke, and that Nash thought one guy was named Simon or Steven or something with an S. She was standing too far away to be sure and the one that spoke had such a bad lisp that she couldn't understand him.

Except when he had said that he would kill Andy if anyone followed him. That part was as clear as day.

Traci had her fingertip in her mouth, her teeth gnawing gently on the nail in nerves.

Jerry reached out and pulled her hand away from her teeth, "We _WILL_ find her". He was making a promise, he just hoped that he could keep it.

Andy was getting tired, the day was speeding away, while she sat with her legs over the end of the bed, they lay down, then sat up.

She hadn't heard one single noise since she had been here, and she didn't know what time it was, she left her watch next to bed this morning because she was running late. It could still be light outside, or dark, she had no idea, she just knew that she had been here for hours.

The door handle jiggled, making Andy swallow the lump in her throat. But the sound of the key slipping into the lock and turning it was mysteriously missing.

The person on the other side of the door tried the handle again, the door refusing to budge.

It instilled fear back into her, why would someone without a key be trying to get into the room?

As suddenly as it had started, it stopped, the door standing in its prior stoic state.

A while later, the key slid into the lock, the door opening, her captor carrying a pizza box and three bottles of water.

He held it out to her when he stopped close enough in front of her, but she declined. Her head shaking from side to side as she pulled the blankets closer around herself.

How could he walk around in just a shirt and jeans? She was freezing.

He moved away, but not before setting the pizza box and water down next to her on the bedside table.

Sam watched her shiver, her nose was red. She was cold. Her shirt was wet from the soda, so that wasn't helping.

He made his way over to the closet, and yanked the door open.

She was tiny, but he was sure that he would find something that would fit her, just to keep her warm.

He scrounged around until he found what he was looking for, held the items in one arm while the other closed the closet door with a loud thud.

Turning to face her, he found her panic back even though she was trying so hard to hide it.

He strode over to the end of the bed, his hand waving the clothing around.

"You can shower, but there are no windows in the bathroom, so there is no way out".

Her eyebrows shot up at his statement, like he figured that she'd try to run the second that she got the chance.

"If you leave this room, I _can not keep you safe_. Do you understand?".

His words caused her mind to roar into a total flat spin, what the hell was he actually saying?

Sam read her questions on her face, it was so expressive that she didn't need to say any words for him to read her mind.

He let out a grunt, his hand flying to pinch the bridge of his nose in frustration, his eyes narrowing at her when he let his nose go. Did he really need to explain it to her?

"There are six other guys here, and trust me, one foot out that door and you won't be mine anymore".

Yeah that was real smooth. Referring to her as his... Well technically, for now; she was.

She seemed to pale at his explanation, like the truth terrified her.

But it should.

"Look, I'm not going to do anything to you. You want a shower take it, you don't, leave it".

He tossed the clothes on the bed every intention of leaving when a soft "Wait" stopped him.

She was looking like the scared dear again.

She didn't have much of a choice right now, if what he said was true, then right now he was the only thing stopping something from happening to her.

She looked between him and the cuffs, not knowing when she would get another chance to shower.

"Do you understand what I said?".

He was much closer now, his tone less harsh this time around as he repeated the question.

He watched her nod before pulling the key to the handcuffs out of his pocket.

As soon as her wrist was free, her other hand wrapped around it, soothing away the burn as it rubbed over the chafed skin.

Sam backed away cautiously, watching her carefully in case she decided to attack him, he really didn't want to have to hurt her while restraining her and putting the cuff back on.

She just looked so fragile, even though he had already witnesses her fire and spunk.

Her hand snatched up the clothes, his head tilting to the side towards the door that she had assumed was the bathroom.

"Towels are in there". He mumbled while scratching the back of his head when she stood up and scurried towards the door like a scared rabbit.

He was sure he saw a small nod from her in appreciation, but he wasn't sure.

Andy closed the door the second she was through it, blocking his view of her.

Sam heard the water run, the spray of the shower altering in sound when she stepped under it.

She was in there for a while, Sam standing up off the edge of the bed when he heard the water stop running.

He moved to the far edge of the room and waited for her to come out, prepared for the worst.

When the door swung open she stopped. Just stood there watching him as her hands moved out to her sides to show him her surrender.

He could see her uniform neatly folded and stacked up on the counter next to the basin as the image reflected in the mirror behind her.

She moved slowly back into the bedroom, her eyes never straying from his.

She looked better, even though she was drowning in the sweat pants and long sleeve shirt he had given her to wear. Her hair was wet and hanging in loose tendrils around her shoulders, an idle attempt to dry it propperly evident.

Sam grabbed the over sized sweat shirt off the top of the chest of drawers next to him and flung it through the air at her. Her hands spread out to catch it instantly, she was fast with her reactions.

Really fast.

She shrugged it on, a small smile flashing in his direction.

As if on cue, she took a seat on the end of the bed, her raw wrist dangling in the air as she waited for him to cuff her back to the bed.

Sam felt bad for her, he knew what it felt like to have your flesh worn away in the same fashion, the metal cuffs chafing away at your tender skin until it was raw and burned.

"Other side".

She looked surprised, but crawled over the bed to sit on the other side, her feet dangling on the floor, her socks meeting the wood as her toes curled up.

Sam loosened the cuff from the bedpost and moved around the bed. He dropped it lower than it had been before, this time it was level with her back, closed around the central bars rather than the upper bars.

When he snapped it in place, he didn't tighten it as much, hoping that she would at least try and keep it still.

Sam edged around the bed and came back with the pizza and water, setting it down next to her. He remembered how she had inspected the can of soda, making sure that it was still sealed before opening it, so he grabbed a slice of pizza and took a bite.

He didn't even know that he was hungry, until he tasted the cheesy dough. When he took the second slice, he held the box out for her, and she reached out and took hold of a slice before taking a timid bite.

She took a second slice too before willingly reaching for the water.

"Thank you". She said rather shyly.

She had scooted over the bed, her legs up and her back leaning against the pillows she stretched out to pull closer.

Sam watched her roll the sleeves of the sweatshirt up, as she tried to get comfortable.

He was having a hard time concentrating.

So he decided to leave.

She bolted upright when he moved towards the door, like she wanted to say something.

But she didn't.

Maybe of she was alone long enough, she'd fall asleep.

She seemed scared to be left alone, Sam hovering in the doorway as he mumbled "I'll be back" before locking her in the room again.

******* So who's still with me?**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	4. Sugar And Spice

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**Chapter. 4 - Sugar And Spice. **

Andy had no idea how long she'd been here, how long she lay on the bed letting her mind run away with her.

The silence ensued after he left, the face without a name.

He was attractive, but scary at the same time- _dark_.

She found herself wondering what he would look like if he smiled, his face was always so- like stone.

Sam found everyone in the lounge, beer bottles scattered on the carpet. The guys were playing poker at a table in the far corner, Bobby sitting on the couch with her laptop on her folded legs, no doubt searching for any indication that the cops had leads.

She didn't seem fazed, so right now it didn't look like they weren't under any threat.

Sam ignored the questioning looks as he let his feet carry him to the fridge where he reached inside and grabbed more bottles of water.

He felt Bobby's gaze following him, but he just kept his head down and ignored it. She would say what she wanted to when she was ready.

Sam paused in front of the door wondering if his prisoner had fallen asleep.

She looked drained.

Nightfall was minutes away, the dangers of alcohol flowing upstairs not going unnoticed, nor was Scott's cold stare. His eyes were always cold, and it had nothing to do with the fact that his eyes were so blue, they were almost see through.

Sam opened the door quietly this time, she was still. Peaceful.

He set the water down next to her side of the bed after crossing the room as quietly as he could. He found her eyes closed, her breathing steady.

She had fallen asleep.

Her face looked so peaceful while she slept, a stray strand of hair across her cheek begging him to swipe it away.

But he refrained.

Sam watched her sleep for a few minutes before heading towards the bathroom. He needed a long, hot shower after a day like today.

When he was done, he found her still statuesque on the bed, her eyes closed.

He rounded the bed, sinking onto it as slowly as he could so not to wake her.

His hand fumbled with the light switch of the lamp next to his side of the bed, the room plunging into darkness the second he clicked it off.

It was way too early to be getting any sleep, but he had been awake since three am, and the day had been tiresome. Excruciatingly exhausting.

Sam shifted around and got comfortable, finding that she had only left him one pillow, but it would do.

Her breathing had changed, it was ragged. His face turning to her to find the whites of her eyes staring at him.

The minute he moved, she recoiled into a ball, pulling as far away as she could, a soft whimper slipping from her.

His hand reacted out automatically for the light switch, his body moving away from her.

When the room was illuminated, he glanced wearily at her, her face marred with more panic than he had ever seen anyone wear.

Sam immediately slid off the bed, his hands mirroring hers held out in surrender earlier.

"I won't... I just need some sleep". Sam had his hands in his pockets now, the keys to the door and cuffs, fingered lightly before he removed them and threw them down on the bed side table. She would never be able to reach them.

"Look,_ I need to sleep _and it's my bed. So I dunno...just put the pillows next to you".

It really wasn't like there were alternatives to their sleeping arrangements.

He sank back down on the bed, this time leaving the light on.

She was still hesitant, her eyes glued to him as he moved. He considered rolling over and facing the door, but then he wouldn't see her if she decided to rebel.

So he stayed on his back, his head facing the ceiling.

She stayed on her side, facing him as she scrutinized him.

Her stare was unnerving, and that wasn't something that just anyone managed to achieve.

"Look, I'm _not_ going to do anything to you. I'm not going to touch you, so just get some sleep, because trust me,_ you're gonna need it". _

_Hi_s tone reminded Andy of her TO, Oliver Shaw. He had the same tone when he gave her the speech- the one that went _'My car, my rules, blah blah blah'. _

Right now, that speech and everything else that she had learned at the academy were absolutely useless.

"Besides, you're not my type". Sam added earning a roll of her eyes.

Not that he really had a type.

But she didn't know that.

Andy watched him suspiciously, but his words started her anxiety fading. When he mentioned his type she pictured a blonde, but one with savvy and brains. The image made her think of Gail wearing bright red lipstick.

A sad smile tugged at her lips, she hadn't even been gone a full day yet, and she was already homesick.

She settled back down, but still kept facing him. She couldn't help herself, he had to be in front of her, where she could see him if he moved.

It took a while, but eventually she was peaceful.

The smell of his shower gel and shampoo assaulted his senses, and somehow he found himself missing the sweet smell her hair had, had when she was sitting on his lap in the car.

Then she smelled like vanilla and peaches, now she smelled like a man.

Like him.

He much proffered her own scent on her, the more masculine one adorning her skin now just smelled so wrong.

Sam watched her sleep for a while, wondering what kind of life she had, who was missing her now that she was gone.

One thought caused him more regret than anything else as it made itself know in his mind; Did she have children at home crying for their mother tonight?

As much as he tried to suppress it, it ran circles around and around in his mind.

When sleep eventually invaded him, he saw pictures of a little girl that looked just like her asking him if he had seen her mother.

Andy woke up, the room dark and eerily silent.

Her captor was gone, cold sheets next to her revealing the secret that he had been gone a while.

Rolling over, she found a plate next to her side of the bed, three more bottles of water.

She sat up and lifted the plate cover to find an omelet on the plate. It smelled delicious.

She noticed a plastic fork next to the plate, a sigh of relief leaving her lips. She was grateful for the utensil, but she hated plastic. It made the food taste different.

Sam left the house, Elliot in tow. He really didn't feel like company, but it was a rule; you went out in two's and someone always stayed home- with someone else.

He asked Bobby to keep an eye on Scott, he really wasn't in the mood to come home and kick his ass.

Elliot was driving, giving Sam time to think. He had to go and get his 'little gift' some decent clothes and some toiletries; that manly smell on her all night just didn't do it for him.

They hit the mall, Elliot keeping to himself as he always did. Since Sam had joined their group 26 months ago, he couldn't remember the man saying more than five words.

Elliot followed Sam wordlessly in and out of stores while he shopped, Bobby's words of 'buy her something nice' never really drifting out of his mind.

But what do you buy someone you don't know?

It took him twenty minutes to sniff through all the shampoo's to find one he liked, before he grabbed a wide range of other female supplies.

He had an older sister, so it wasn't hard to check the items off his mental list as he moved through the isles.

Next was a clothing store, Elliot walking off blushing when Sam headed straight for the underwear section.

He had absolutely no idea of what kind of underwear she proffered, so he chose by color.

Some were lace, some cotton, some really raunchy, while others more reserved.

Some came as a matching set, others single items.

Woman had preferences on these things, so he smiled at the wide selection he had made, and put them in his shopping cart. At least he had probably guessed the right size.

Next were pajamas and slippers, followed by jeans and long sleeve shirts. A few jerseys and a warm jacket and scarf followed.

He grabbed a soft pink set of towels when he passed them, trying to make things easier for her. Because whether or not she knew it, she would be around for a while.

Next was a hair dryer, brushes and tie backs, a toothbrush and that stuff that said 'No Hair'; the bottle of liquid women use to remove leg hair?

Yup, no way was he getting her a razor blade of any kind.

He kept his in the top drawer of the dresser, so she wouldn't find it, at least he hoped she wouldn't.

Sam grabbed some magazines and books, followed by stacks of candy bars before hitting the check out, the girl serving him showing her shock when he unpacked the items onto the counter.

_If only she knew. _

Elliot drove them back home, still wrapped up in silence, although a huge smile showed to Sam when he helped him unload the parcels.

He carried them downstairs and set them down next to the door before leaving, he knew that Sam liked his privacy and seemed to respect that fact.

Andy's head lifted as the door opened, hands laden with bags.

He set them down and unpacked the toiletries into the bathroom, and the clothes he handed to her in the bags.

"Didn't know what you liked".

Andy reached out for the bags, her eyes peering inside before they sought his out. Her eyes were glazed over, tears locked away in them.

She understood.

Understood that she would be here long enough to need a new wardrobe and bags full of toiletries.

She set the bags down on the floor, and shifted back onto the bed trying to get comfortable.

"I'm sorry". He really was. About all of it.

"Then why can't you just let me go?". The sass returned to her voice. Self confidence oozing out on a strong tone.

"Because they won't let you go 'till this is over". Why was he even explaining this to her? The less she knew, the better for her.

She was facing him again, her face tugged up in frustration. She wanted out of here, and she wanted out now.

"Look, if there was another option...". What was he supposed to add? We'd let you go?

When it wasn't true.

"There is always another option". Her voice was cold, this time. Some of its fire lacking.

"Lady, you asked to come, you gave yourself in the kids place. For now, this is the only option. _They will kill you before letting you go". _

Sam regretted instilling enough fear into her to make her go so pale that her skin was almost translucent.

He huffed out a breath and looked away, his eyes swinging over the room before settling back on her.

"Look I'm sorry. These guys will come looking for you if I let you go, and they will hurt you. So for now, this is the best place you can be".

Okay, she hadn't been expecting that. But obviously she was all over the news so they knew who she was. So he was speaking some truth.

And he looked really remorseful that she was here.

Andy sniffed a little, keeping the tears at bay. She was stronger than this.

So she would bide her time and wait.

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	5. Forgetting Me

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**Chapter 5 - Forgetting Home. **

Her captor forced a smile before digging around in his pocket for the handcuff keys.

He stepped closer, and she lifted her arm, his eyes following her every movement.

He stepped away, and motioned towards the chest of drawers closest to the closet before walking backwards and giving her some space.

Andy scooped up the horde of bags and lugged them over to the drawers before dropping them all on the floor and reaching for one.

She emptied the entire bag out on top of the dark wood, her eyes widening at some of the items as they spilled out in a tangle of material.

Lifting up one item she stared at it as it hung hooked over the edge of her finger.

Turning to seek out the eyes watching her, Andy could feel her cheeks flush almost as red as the garment hanging from her finger.

"Seriously?".

She swung the tiny red thong back and forth on her finger resisting the urge to burst out laughing.

She had never had someone buy her such raunchy underwear, well except Traci. And here this guy had.

And she didn't even know his name.

Andy turned back to the pile of tousled garments, her hand reaching out for the matching bra.

Andy dropped her head and let out a giggle.

This was by far turning out to be the worst day of her life, but at least he got the sizes right.

Twenty minutes later she had finished packing all the clothes away, except for a few items that she left on the top of the drawers hoping that he would let her change into them.

His clothes were warm, but they were far too big.

"Can I um...". Andy held up the clothes and nodded towards the bathroom, a silent nod giving her permission to go ahead.

Traci stared vacantly at the phone, wishing it would ring so that her mind could avoid any more reruns of yesterday.

Sergeant Best had her on front desk, and really she shouldn't be complaining; after a sleepless night like she had endured last nigh, she would probably be dangerous on the streets.

Luke's antagonistic comments from yesterday came tearing through her mind.

He had come into the interrogation room and asked her if she thought _"McNally may be in on it?"_ As he had so casually phrased it.

Her answer had been a _"Do you want me to punch you in the face...Sir?" _When she lost her last little bit of cool.

Luke had smiled at her reply, almost like he was appreciative of her friendship with Andy.

He had an eye on Andy, had for a while, but Andy seemed to shy away from dating someone that she worked with.

Hours after re-running over everything Luke had said that she could go home.

Leaving the interrogation room she found Gail, Dov, Chris and the mother and son that Andy had traded herself for outside the door.

The woman looked sad as she stood up and just wrapped her arms around Traci before saying "Thank you. I hope you find your friend real soon".

The poor woman had been inconsolable when Traci walked into the bank with the kid when backup had arrived, her crocodile tears of joy at seeing him there breaking Traci's heart.

"Anything?" Traci asked weakly, the others shaking their heads.

"They won't let us in on this". Chris said as they walked towards the doors, knowing that Traci probably wanted to go home to Leo.

She still had to tell him what happened. Jerry let her call her mom and tell her not to let Leo watch TV because Andy had been taken. She wanted to tell Leo herself because he was really close to Andy, and he was old enough to understand that she might not be coming home.

But as much as she stared at the offensive phone now, it just wouldn't ring.

Andy let the water run hot before stepping in under it.

She had browsed through the collection of shampoos and deodorants, soaps, shower gels and creams that were packed out on the counter for her, a sad smile playing in the mirror as she caught sight of herself.

He had sought out the shampoo and hand cream that she liked, but she still found no comfort it that.

She had searched around the bathroom looking for a razor blade but found none, she needed something she could use as a weapon.

Her earrings were already pinned into the space between the mattress and base of the bed, with every intention of being used to pick locks.

The water was hot, scalding her skin as she let it rid her of the dirtiness she felt being here.

_It was all so wrong. _

When she emerged from the bathroom, Sam was hit with the unmistakable smell that had filled the car.

It was vanilla and peaches as it wafted out on the billowing steam as the door opened.

He had the TV on, trying to find some sense of normalcy without letting his guard slip.

She looked better when he looked her way, refreshed and less shell shocked than she had been earlier.

"Clothes okay?". He asked as she stepped forwards.

They seemed to fit pretty well from where he was standing.

"Thanks". She nodded. The boot slippers he had picked out were a little big, but they were warm and comfortable.

Andy's attention snapped to the TV, her face splurged over the screen as captions of her name rolled across the screen followed by 'Officer still missing'.

Dark eyes washed over her as he said her name. _"Andrea McNally". _

Andy had to resist the urge to roll her eyes.

It was the name on her ID, but she hadn't been called Andrea since she hit her teens.

"Doesn't suit you" he added.

_"Andy". _She managed out, still staring at the screen.

"Excuse me?".

Looking at him, Andy noticed that he seemed a little lost.

"It's Andrea, but I go by Andy".

"Andy". Saying her name made him smile.

Her face disappeared off the TV screen, and was replaced with images of reporters hounding the front of Fifteen, scores of uniforms holding them off as the mother and the kid she had traded herself for walked out the front doors escorted by Noelle and Gail.

She missed home, and the images on the TV caused a whole flood of sadness to sweep over her.

"... Food".

Whatever he had been saying fell on deaf ears as her mind wrapped itself up in memories of home.

"I'm sorry, what?". Andy tore her attention away from the screen, trying to focus on what was being said to her.

He held up the remote and tapped a button, the TV returning to an idle, black screen.

"Do you want me to get you some food?".

Andy stared at him, no clue how he expected her to eat now. She wasn't a eat when depressed kind of person.

"No, what I want is to go home. I want to sleep in my own bed without being shackled to it. I want to go to work and I want drinks with my friends". Andy hissed out, her tone making his jaw set as he glared at her.

"Sam"

_"What?"._ She shrieked it out.

"I'm Sam". He extended a hand out as if they were being introduced for the first time, under pleasant circumstances.

"Are you insane? Is there something wrong with you?" Andy couldn't help the fury in her voice as she yelled a little louder than she would normally speak.

"If you're mad, you're not missing home".

He was right, even though he didn't know her, or anything about her, he knew how to push her buttons enough to make her forget home for those few seconds.

That just made her madder.

Stomping off, Andy had the urge to slap him because he had succeeded in getting under her skin.

Flopping down on the bed on her side, Andy's only thought was that she would be the one waring the smug look on her face when she got out of here and came back with every cop she could find.

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	6. Out In The Cold

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**Chapter 6- Out In The Cold. **

Days bled into each other, Andy keeping count by watching the news every morning.

So far, it seemed that she had been here for eleven days. Give or take.

Sam was looking after her, bringing her food and enough to drink, even a thermos of coffee regularly as the weather seemed to edge towards colder.

He left her cuff off, except when they slept. It was always snapped back in place at bedtime, whether she planned on sleeping yet, or not.

He spent a fair amount of time with her, but most days he was gone for a few hours.

They managed to carry conversations without awkwardness, and even shared an occasional joke. Well he did, and she only laughed because they were so bad.

She was actually laughing at him, and not really the joke.

It was easy to be around him, even though she was constantly on guard and watched him suspiciously.

The door would still occasionally jiggle, annoying her more than it made her wonder.

But it was weird, it happened one day when Sam was in the shower and Andy watching TV.

It was ridiculously late, almost three am, and Sam had just come in after declaring that he had to go to _'work' _earlier in the day.

She didn't ask questions, only because she didn't want to hear his answers.

Sam came out the bathroom after a shower, in time to see Andy bolt upright on the bed. Even though he had tried to come in quietly, she had still woken up.

She wasn't cuffed, because he hadn't been here, so she shrunk back on the bed like she was anticipating someone to come through the door.

Sam looked between her and the door, catching sight of the handle as it lifted back in place before it was still.

_"Son of a b...". _

Sam yelled out before he could stop himself.

Throwing the towel that he had been using to dry his hair on the bed, he stomped back into the bathroom and came out with his shirt on, and his gun in his hand.

Andy stared at him with fearful eyes as he slid the gun into the waistband of his pants, under his shirt before moving towards the door.

_"Sam?". _

He was fighting to get the key in the lock, but eventually managed to get the door swung open, Andy hot on his heels as he raced up the stairs and through the door at the top.

Andy followed as Sam stormed across the room and into a lounge filled with the other faces that she had yet to see.

A woman with spiky hair jumped out of her seat the second that she saw Sam come into the room. She knocked the chair over in her haste to peddle across the room away from the table that she sat playing poker at with four other guys.

One of the guys, one that looked more like a kid, left his chair too as Sam continued to charge across the room, rage seeping off him as he made a beeline for one guy in particular.

"You piece of garbage". Sam yelled as he reached out and yanked the guy right out of his chair.

"Sammy". The word came out in warning from the voice Andy could now name as a face.

_"Not now". _Sam gruffed in reply as he walked the guy that he had grabbed hold of right into the wall behind them.

"I warned you...". Sam seethed, a dry laugh filtering out of the strangers mouth.

He glanced at Andy over Sam's shoulder, before he licked his lips looking straight at her when he did.

It was so disgusting that Andy had to look away.

He had the most amazing blue eyes, and was fairly good looking, but his teeth were rotten from endless highs on Meth. And he needed a shave and haircut.

Sam slammed him into the wall again, before relinquishing his hold on the guy, Andy breathing a sigh of relief that he hadn't pulled his gun out yet.

Just as Sam turned away to talk to the big, bald guy with tattoos down his neck, the guy that he had slammed into the wall stuck his tongue out at Andy, and made this eerie slithering sound.

Sam's words never made it out of his mouth, he just turned around and punched the guy in the face.

The guy staggered backwards and shook his head, as if he was taunting Sam, daring him to do it again.

Sam turned around again to find Andy staring at him, her hand over her face as though she could block the images out, and keep her gasps silent.

The guy that faced Sam's fury took a swing at him, but Sam was quicker and caught his arm, tugged him forward and let him slide along the wooden length of the floor.

Within seconds the guy had retaliated, and Sam was on the floor too, before he gained the upper hand and ended up with the guy under him as he slammed his head into the floor.

The bald guy said something to a big burly guy, that looked like a teddy bear, before the two of them moved in to pull Sam off the guy who's head he was repeatedly slamming against the floor.

But Sam wasn't having any of it, so more punches were thrown.

Without thinking Andy stepped forwards, ignoring 'Spiky's' yells of _'stop' _her hand reaching out for Sam in a bid to draw his attention when calling him failed.

Sam lashed out at the hands on him, his face coming up to meet Andy's the second his hands shoved her away.

Then he froze.

All movement stopped, as he watched Andy stumble backwards before tumbling over.

Crap.

The hands holding him suddenly let go, his freedom now only granted because he had probably uttered a string of profanity's.

Bobby flew across the room to Andy, who had a really pissed off look across her face as she stared at Sam from where she was sitting on the floor.

Damian and Elliot backed away, Scott still laying on the floor nursing his head as blood stained the wood beneath it.

Andy didn't get hurt, she was just uncoordinated when she meddled where she shouldn't have. Getting in between guys getting physical was not a good idea. Sam's strength caught her off guard and she lost her balance, at a time when she really needed it, so she was livid.

_With herself._

She knew that Sam didn't intentionally shove her to the floor, he was just trying to get out of reach of the other guys hands.

Andy watched as Sam got this really strange look across his face before he looked at the woman and walked away.

Sam hit the fresh air with the urge to smoke a cigarette. He had never smoked, bit he'd never shoved a woman to the floor either, even if it was accidental.

"You okay?". Damian was there, his words coming out with a string of steam as his hot breath met the cold air.

It was snowing again, but Sam's flaring temper warmed him from the inside out, so he didn't feel the cold.

"Yup".

"Funny, she said the same thing".

Sam had gone from being mad at Scott, to being enraged with himself.

He wasn't that kind of guy, and even if she was in the way, he should have stopped himself in time.

He had a temper, but it wasn't something that he ever lost control of, until tonight.

Andy's face when she saw the door handle jiggle was enough to tell him that it wasn't the first time that Scott had checked to see if the door was unlocked.

"He was wrong, but it didn't mean...".

"Wrong? How many times has he tried it?". Sam virtually yelled out.

He really had no idea why the others tolerated Scott's behavior.

"Sam, look I get it okay. But really? This is not a good idea".

Sam looked at Damian, his words making a little more sense.

"Not gonna happen Damian. I _don't_ do girls like that".

"You okay?".

Wow, her voice was much sweeter than she looked.

"Yeah, fine". Andy replied as she made it to her feet.

She wasn't really, but these people didn't know her well enough to know when she was lying.

The woman nodded towards the kitchen when Sam slammed the door closed on his way out, Andy following since all eyes were on her and she couldn't run when she was the centre of attention.

Even though the door to freedom was screaming her name from a few feet away.

The woman set about making coffee, just two cups, her eyes never really veering off of Andy.

"He didn't mean it". She said when she handed Andy a cup, her hands wrapping around the warmth as she cradled it in her hands.

Andy merely nodded, she couldn't argue about someone she knew nothing about.

"He _didn't_ mean it". She repeated.

"I know".

Andy kept flicking her eyes to the door and back to the woman who was regarding her with a cautious stare.

"I'm sorry, you know, that you're here". The woman sounded genuine when she said it, Andy's heart skipping a beat.

Movement behind Andy caught the woman's eye, Andy turning around to see the 'leader' wave a bottle of whiskey up before nodding towards the door.

"They're good guys". The woman said leaning against the counter top.

"I'm Bobby, by the way".

Andy smiled, she couldn't help herself. The woman was friendly and warm, not quite what she had expected from a woman hanging out with a bunch of robbers, and whatever else they did.

Andy tried to subtly take in her surroundings. She was evaluating every possible escape route while she tried to count the seconds it would take her to run from one space to another.

Then her mind would swing to Sam, and she would forcibly swing it back.

After coffee, Bobby eyed her apologetically and walked her to the door that led back downstairs to the basement where they were... Living, for lack of a better word.

"He won't be walking around tonight, Sammy made sure of that. So don't worry, you'll be safe".

Andy descended the stairs and closed the bedroom door behind her before sinking down on the bed.

Everything inside of her was screaming that she should run, that she had the perfect opportunity to regain her freedom, but she couldn't.

Her thoughts still kept wondering to Sam, and grazing over the fact that she needed to know that he was okay.

So she waited.

And waited, for him to come back, until she fell asleep.

Sam woke up with a finger prodding his ribs.

He groaned as his head started pounding and his stomach churned.

Yup, he was going to have a mother of a hangover.

Opening one eye, he found Bobby standing over him, her eyebrows raised in question as to why he was passed out on the couch, when he had a nice comfy bed to sleep in downstairs.

_"Nice"_. Bobby said before disappearing.

It was still pretty dark, so it was early.

Sam sat up and took in the view of the room he was in, when sudden panic cursed through him.

Before he knew it, he flung the door to his bedroom open, a breath of relief fluttering out when he saw her curled up asleep in bed.

Watching her, Sam leaned against the doorframe and let his eyes roam over her peaceful frame.

His hangover had been momentarily forgotten when he suddenly realized that she had the perfect opportunity to slip away, although it would have been the stupidest thing she could ever do.

And that was just so wrong, it was wrong because he wanted her to still be here.

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	7. The Great Escape

**Hey there, time for another update!**

**Thanks for the amazing response to this, and Blurry Lines! **

**Thanks to the regulars, and kelly2727!**

**Welcome to all the newbies, seen a lot pop up. **

**Chapter 7 - The Great Escape. **

The sound of running water roused Andy.

Taking a moment to gather herself as sleep faded away, her hand silently stretched out to find emptiness next to her.

Strange how her body automatically reacted by reaching out in search of her abductor.

Lifting her head, Andy found Sam's side of the bed still made up, he hadn't slept in it at all.

But he was in the shower now.

It was weird waking up and he wasn't there. It felt like he was supposed to be there, next to her when she woke up.

Andy sat patiently on the edge of the bed waiting for him to emerge from the bathroom, her mind whirring away.

She had the perfect chance to slip out last night, but yet here she was, waiting to see if he was okay after going a round with a guy that was high on Meth.

When Sam tried to open the door quietly, she looked up and right his way as he stepped out the bathroom in a cloud of steam.

Sam's feet stopped moving when he saw her, his jaw tensing at the sad look she had on her face.

He skipped shaving Andy noticed, as his teeth clenched and his jaw tightened. But the rugged look worked for him.

Sam looked away, and walked straight past her to yank open the closet door and fish out a T-shirt and jacket. He threw them on, before digging around for socks and shoes.

When he spun around, Andy was right behind him, her arm's crossed over her chest.

"It was an accident". He managed weakly before stepping to the side to be cut off by her doing the same.

"No-one said it _wasn't_".

Sam couldn't look at her, so he kept his eyes sweeping across the room. He really didn't want to see the disgust in her eyes.

Not that he should be worried about what she thought about him.

He must have groaned out aloud because she answered him.

"Are you even going to talk to me?".

"Nope". Sam said moving around her and sitting on the end of the bed to put on his socks and shoes.

"Why didn't you come back?". She whispered meekly as she moved to stand in front of him, her arm's still crossed over her chest.

"Because if I don't stay away, bad things will happen to you".

And that made her stare at him a little more, because even though they didn't know each other inside out, she knew him well enough to know that he firmly believed what he had just said.

Sam stood up abruptly once his shoes were tied, Andy's lips now reverted back to quiet.

With one last gaze in her direction, he was out the door, the key never sounding in the lock.

Sam stared into his coffee, his mind raging with a million and one things.

He came upstairs ready to accompany Damian to the meeting for the shipment, but he'd already left; telling Bobby that Sammy needed to 'Pull his head out his ass', which of course she told Sammy.

She also told him that Elliot had taken Scott to the hospital to get his head stitched back together now that he was sober enough.

Sam's mind waged a war with itself, he really had no idea what he was doing.

He hoped that Andy would take the unlocked door as a sign to run, but the longer he sat there the more he hoped that she wouldn't.

The last couple of days had him really paying attention to her, what she said, any personal details that she revealed about herself. Because he had this inexplicable need to know more. To get to know her.

He was just drawn to her.

And had the really strong urge to protect her.

Andy sat down on the end of the bed when the door closed, her eyes fixated on the whitewashed wood.

She was well aware of the fact that the sound of the key in the door never appeared.

Before now, she wanted to run. Last night she wanted to stay, just to see that Sam was okay. Now she was indecisive as to what she wanted to do.

His cold shoulder was confusing, just when she was starting to think that they had some kind of connection, he totally iced her out.

He seemed like a good guy, like he would ultimately do the right thing; but he seemed like the good guy gone wrong too.

"You should bring her up". Bobby's voice called through his thoughts.

She was busy making them breakfast, he could smell the breakfast smells; bacon, eggs, toast - and he already had the coffee.

Usually in the morning he would race upstairs and get Andy a thermos of coffee and something to eat, but this morning he didn't have the willpower to face her.

Bobby slammed her hand down on the table, Sam jumping as the sound reverberated through the room.

_"Where are you?"_ She asked when he looked up and actually paid attention to her.

"Get her _now,_ Sammy, it's getting cold".

Man, Bobby was grouchy in the morning, she really wasn't a morning person.

Sam let out a frustrated sigh as he pushed his chair back and stood up.

He crossed the house and descended the stairs and turned the door handle. He pushed the door wide open and left it like that, her eyes asking a million questions.

She gathered that she was meant to follow, so when he walked away, Andy grabbed her jacket off the top of the chest of drawers and followed silently.

She hovered in the doorway of the kitchen, her eyes seeking out the others, while she shrugged her jacket on and zipped it up. It really was cold.

"Morning, don't worry we're alone" Bobby yelled out causing Andy to jump.

Sam stood leaning against the counter top in the far corner of the kitchen, his hand wrapped around the mug, his face cast towards the floor.

"Coffee?". Bobby asked as she waived in the direction of the cup already set out for Andy.

Andy poured herself a cup of coffee while Bobby streaked around the kitchen, finishing off breakfast.

Within minutes, plates of food were set out on the table.

Eggs, toast, bacon, grilled tomato, fried banana, and breakfast bangers.

Andy smiled at Bobby as she sat down, the woman looking between her and the chair as if she was daring her to argue.

Bobby pushed the plates across the table top towards Andy before nodding. It reminded Andy of childhood meals at her grandmothers house.

Sam still hung back, weary to join them until Bobby spun around in her chair and gave him one look.

It made him sit instantly.

Andy dished up small helping's of everything, her stomach agreeing with her decision to eat.

Eyeing the syrup on the table, Andy reached out for it and popped the lid. She tilted the bottle upside down smothering her bacon and bangers in syrup.

Bobby let out a light chuckle, her eyes looking between Sam and Andy.

"I'm sorry, he does the same thing. Only person in the house that eats syrup". Bobby explained.

It gave Andy the urge to launch her plate across the room.

But it drew a small lopsided grin from Sam, he really looked so much better when he smiled.

They ate in silence, Andy's mind working away while her teeth chewed her food.

After they had finished Sam began clearing the table while Bobby poured them more coffee.

Andy really was being treated more like a house guest than a hostage.

"Can I um... Use the bathroom?". Andy suddenly blurted.

Bobby nodded towards the wall before saying "First right" as Andy pushed her chair back and stood up.

It really wasn't planned, but when she saw the small window in the bathroom she knew that this was it. She was going to run.

She used the bathroom first, before measuring the small window. It was tiny.

Within seconds she had discarded her jacket- again. It was too bulky and would never fit through the space.

Climbing up on the basin, Andy opened the lever and lifted the glass, the small squeak making her cringe.

She stretched up and pushed herself through, the pin attached to the bottom of the window pane scratching her stomach painfully as she slid through.

Her left slipper slid off, but she had to leave it. There was no way she was going back for it.

"Hey Sammy, gone for a run lately?". Bobby suddenly asked him, a tint of teasing humor lacing her voice.

Sam followed her line of vision out the window just in time to see Andy streak past it.

"Shit". Sam mumbled as he took off across the room and towards the front door.

He gave chase, noting that Andy had shed her jacket and was running in her socks, her legs sinking into the deep snow as she plowed across it.

She didn't get very far before he saw her strides faltering and her legs growing tired.

In under three minutes he had caught up with her, just outside the tree line that ran the length of this side of the property.

She ignored him calling her name, and asking her to stop, he wasn't telling her, _he was asking- nicely. _

Just when she thought she was about to get the upper hand by escaping into the underbrush that lined the trees, a heavy weight pounced on her and she hit the snow face first.

She was rolled over, and came face to face with Sam, who looked even madder than he was last night.

She attempted fighting but it was in vain, he was too strong and she was too tired and way too cold.

Her feet had lost all feeling, and she wasn't even sure that her knees were on her legs anymore, the cold spreading up her legs in a vine of frozen fire.

"Are you insane? Have you lost your mind?". He was yelling at her, his face hard set as he held her hands from smacking him anymore.

"We're forty miles from the nearest road. You have no shoes on and left your jacket behind. Do you have a death wish?".

_"I'm gonna die here anyway"_ her voice was shallow and empty as she said it, the words slicing through Sam more than her fist pounding his chest had.

"Nope, not gonna happen". Sam mumbled noticing her lips turning blue and her body begin to shake.

She was soaked through to the bone and didn't seem worried about it.

Sam got up off the ground, and her, and shrugged his jacket off before tugging Andy's hand so that she would sit up.

She sat up but just barely, her body unwilling to co-operate as it tried to fight the moving motion by conserving body heat.

Sam wrapped his jacket around her, scooped her up and carried her back towards the house.

By the time he reached the front steps, Bobby came flying through the lounge telling him that she had the tub full of hot water.

She was the only woman in the house, so Damian had a bath tub put in their room for her. She was the only one that had ever used it, and now Andy was about to be shoved into it in an attempt to warm her up.

Her lips were still blue by the time Sam got her upstairs and set her down on Bobby's bed.

He glanced at Bobby before she moved past him and started removing Andy's clothes starting with Sam's jacket and her waterlogged socks.

Sam moved away giving Bobby space to undress Andy, before she spun around and looked at him expectantly.

She was a tad shorter than Andy, so obviously there was no way that she would pick her up and carry her to the bath tub.

Sam moved closer and scooped Andy up with ease.

Setting her down in the tub he noticed that there really wasn't all that much water in it, but set Andy down gently in it anyway.

"Just keep adding warm water and keep her head out the water". Bobby looked like she was enjoying Sam being uncomfortable.

"You can't leave me here with her". Sam said as he opened the faucet and added a little more hot water to the tub.

"Of course I can, someone's gotta do the laundry".

With that Bobby was gone, a light giggle resounding as she left them alone, Sam embarrassed and Andy in her underwear.

Sam sat on the end of the tub and closed the faucet.

Andy was barely lucid, her body slipping into hanging between consciousness and sleep as it tried to conserve energy.

He really was pissed off at her for making a run for it, when there really was nowhere to go.

She wasn't dressed to be outside and the snow was deep.

She wouldn't have survived if he hadn't stopped her, and being responsible for something happening to her just wasn't something he wanted to think about.

At all.

Ever.

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	8. Gaping Wounds

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**Chapter 8- Gaping Wounds. **

Andy woke up warm and fuzzy.

She had the sensation of floating, like she was experiencing her own personal glimpse of heaven.

A sudden noise close to her ear made one eye open and peer into dark eyes watching her back.

Then everything came flooding back. Tidal waves of images as she remembered her futile attempt to escape.

Shifting around Andy felt the sheet slip across her bare leg when it tickled her skin as she rolled over and dragged it with her.

Yanking the sheet up, Andy looked under it to find bare feet and legs wiggling around under the covers.

Her face snapped up as she met Sam's gaze from across the room; he had brought one of the chairs from the table upstairs down and sat on it just inside the door, watching her intensely.

"I didn't". He said at her face shuffling through so many pained expressions. "Trust me, you would know if I did".

Andy wrapped the covers around herself, pulling them up until they cocooned her, wrapped her up tightly, hiding herself from view.

She noticed that she had a shirt on, one of his oversized, long sleeved shirts- but that didn't even begin to subside the disgrace she felt right now.

The door opened and Bobby's head peeked in, a warm smile on her lips as she saw Andy sitting up in bed.

Andy looked on as Bobby and Sam exchanged a few words before Bobby slipped away again.

The woman was like a magic trick- now you see me, now you don't.

Sam's attention was focused back on her, a scowl tearing over his face as his eyes darkened and he leaned forward; bracing his elbows on his knees.

"I get that you don't want to be here, but do you have any idea how stupid that was?".

His voice was calm, and controlled. It was creepy.

It made Andy look down at her lap,even though there was nothing to focus on besides her hands that clung to one another.

"Is this what you're like? Just run and jump into everything headfirst?". He added when she kept silent.

Andy nodded, not even knowing why she was; but his description was accurate- it was how she is.

_"Well, right now, you can't be you". _

_"What? _You can't be..."

"Serious? Oh trust me I am. You have no idea what you've gotten yourself into do you?".

His voice now had a razor sharp edge to it as he asked her the question. It made a shiver run down her spine and her toes curl.

"These guys don't play around. They take what they want, and they won't let anything get in their way. We're forty miles from the nearest road if you go that way, another ten before you'll see any kind of civilization".

Sam watched as Andy's eyes teared up again. Her eyes were really the windows to her soul; and right now - _her soul was crying. _

"I'm trying here, I really am, but you need to understand something. This isn't a game Andy. This is real. This is not what you see on TV. Earlier you said you're going to die here, you won't. _I promise,_ but you need to help me to do that".

Andy felt guilty all of a sudden.

For biting him, and hitting him. For throwing a can of soda at him. For always watching him like she was expecting him to do something to her. For last night- making him lose his temper. And for running.

"I...".

The door opened and Bobby was back, carrying a tray of something that smelled divine.

Andy was famished.

"Up to eating?". Bobby asked as she handed Andy the tray.

Andy nodded, and reached out to take the tray.

"You gave Sammy here a heart attack, don't do that again".

Bobby's words made Andy look between her and Sam. Now she felt really bad.

Bobby turned to address Sam, Andy tucking into the Chicken a la King.

"You heard from the guys yet? They should've been back already".

Andy heard the worry drizzle in Bobby's voice, and couldn't help but wonder if this was going to be her getting out of here- they guys had left and hadn't come back, maybe they'd been caught?

"They'll be okay, probably stopped for food or a drink".

Andy heard it in Sam's voice too. He wasn't totally convinced, even though he was trying to reassure Bobby.

"You're right. They're only like _four hours late"_.

Andy stifled a giggle, Bobby was so much like Gail. The sarcasm in that one sentence was enough to make Sam's eyebrow lift.

"They're okay, you know the guys".

"Yeah, maybe".

It wasn't long after that; that Bobby left, leaving Sam and Andy alone, Andy still picking at her food.

"I meant what I said earlier". Sam said idly as Andy pushed her tray away.

He stood up out the chair and moved closer, Andy noticing a rolled up news paper in his hand.

He held it out for her to take, a soft page three mumbled.

Andy noticed the date of the newspaper, it was the same as the day he bought her the clothes and supplies, or it was what she surmised anyway.

She tediously unfolded the newspaper and went to page three, her eyes scanning the headlines until something caught her eye.

'Prisoner killed in holding cell' read the caption.

Her eyes scanned over the words, a guy named Tony Demiera was stabbed and killed in police custody after being arrested for a DUI. He was killed the same day the bank robbery took place, and police had tried to keep it under wraps but it got out.

It was yet undetermined who had stabbed him, or how they even got into his cell.

"He was part of this crew?". Andy's voice sounded so far away that Sam had to strain his hearing to hear her.

He nodded, trying his best not to scare her, but she had no clue what she had walked into the middle of.

She was playing with her life.

Damian was an enforcer, he had one rule- his way or a bullet. If he had been here when she attempted to run, he wouldn't have gone after her, he would have used her for target practice.

"The brother of Scott, the guy I ...".

Oh, so he was a piece of trash too.

"I just want you to behave, stay out of trouble, and I will keep you safe".

Andy had the strangest sense that he actually meant it when saying that.

"Sssaaammm!" Bobby's panicked voice rang down the stairs as she screamed for him from somewhere in the house, his name carried out on a piercing shrill.

Something was wrong.

Sam moved like lightning and grabbed his gun out of the top drawer of the dresser before pausing in the doorway and throwing keys towards Andy.

"Lock the door, don't open it for anyone but me and Bobby"

The door slammed closed as Andy threw back the covers and grabbed the keys while stumbling to her feet.

Within seconds she had crossed the room, jammed the key in the lock and turned it with a shaking hand.

It felt strange to be locking herself in the room.

Andy ambled back over to the bed and slid under the covers trying to subdue the stressful feelings that ran through her.

Time ebbed away, feeling like forever as she waited for someone to come back down to tell her that everything was okay.

She didn't care who came down, she just wanted to know that there wasn't any danger upstairs. That there wasn't a threat to her.

A sharp knocking on the door made her stir in fright, she was nervous and edgy.

"Andy, open the door".

Sam was back.

Her hand fumbled for the lock as she turned the key.

The door opened to reveal a weary looking Sam.

"Bobby needs you to um...".

He looked hesitant as he tried to find words, unsure of how she was about to react.

"You need to go upstairs" he added dryly after drawing in a deep breath, a hand running through his hair leaving it a mop of disheveled darkness on top of his head.

The words chilled Andy. They made her wonder if the leader had found out about her escapades earlier, and she was about to receive some form of punishment.

Her face must have spoken volumes, because within seven seconds Sam tried to find a smile as he whispered "Nothing will happen to you".

It creeped Andy out that he had the ability to get inside her head.

Andy swung around and set about finding a pair of pants and socks to put on, Sam avoiding all eye contact with her as he spun around and waited for her to finish getting dressed.

When she was done, and cleared her throat Sam turned around and nodded. He suddenly reached out and took her hand, leading her out the door and up the stairs into the house.

When they stopped, Andy's hand was still in Sam's; a reassuring squeeze pressing lightly against her fingers.

Andy took in the room, it was a mass of knocked over chairs, scattered pillows from the couch, and a mass of bloody towels on the floor.

Sam had been standing in front of her, as if to shield her from the misfortunes that the room held. When he diverted himself slightly to the side Andy felt like time had stopped.

The guy with the baby face lay curled up on the couch, the leader slung over the table, both with crimson marring's.

Andy yanked her hand out of Sam's, her feet re-tracing a few steps backwards.

"Andy".

Andy looked up to find Bobby standing next to her, a pale complexion overrun over her healthy glow.

"I need you to help me out okay?".

Andy was shaking her head, it moving venomously from side to side.

"I can't do this alone". Bobby's voice sounded so far from the bubbly, energetic one she had before, it sounded shaky now.

It trembled with every syllable she spoke.

"Andy, I've done all the work, Lars needs to be patched up, that's all".

Andy looked between the kid and Bobby before Sam came into view, a slight dipping of his head blocking his face from view.

Andy could see that his jaw was clenching, and that he looked uncomfortable.

"Just a couple stitches..."

"What? I can't sew" Andy stammered out.

"The copper doesn't sew". The voice of the guy Sam yanked out of his chair last night drew everyone's attention as he spoke.

Everyone had seemed to come home around the same time.

Andy noticed the white patch over the guys head, and had the sudden urge to smack him on it, just so that he would shut up.

Her hand instinctively reached out for Sam's arm the second she heard the voice. She wasn't in the mood for a repeat of last night.

"Please, they were both shot Andy, I can only help one of them". Andy looked between Sam and Bobby again.

Sam nodded powerfully this time, causing Andy to exhale a deep breath.

Then she nodded.

Not that she had even ever sewn a button on.

Bobby sighed in relief as she reached out for Andy's hand and pulled her across the room towards the kitchen counter stacked with supplies.

"Disinfect your hands, here" Bobby held out a bottle, so Andy held out her hands to have a cold liquid squirted into them.

It smelled like pine and freshness

"Here, I've threaded these and sterilized them. Take this and clean the would again and then stitch. Doesn't matter what it looks like, just get it closed".

Andy grabbed the items, Sam materialized next to her to help her carry.

He led her over to Lars and set the items down on the floor next to the couch.

He moved away, Andy letting out a light whimper as she thought he was about to leave her there.

He came back with a bottle of whiskey and held it out for her to take with one hand, a pair of latex gloves in the other.

Andy took the gloves as soon as she put the stuff cluttering her hands down on the floor. She eyed the whiskey, with raised eyebrows.

"For you". Sam said as he unscrewed the cap and held it out for her.

Andy took the bottle and lifted it to her lips with a shaky hand, a long slow sip causing her insides to warm up as soon as she swallowed.

Handing it back to Sam, Andy tried to find a smile but it just wasn't there.

She bent down next to the couch, the hard floor under her knees digging into the bones as she lifted the needle and whatever had been threaded on it out of a small silver dish.

With hesitant hands Andy leaned over the kid and stretched out over him ready to try and stitch the hole in his shoulder closed.

"Take a deep breath". Sam's voice seemed to be really close to her ear, like he was right there.

Pinching her eyes closed for just a second, Andy did as told and blew it out.

Leaning up a little higher, Andy pushed the needle through the kids flesh, a small groan earned in response.

When Andy was satisfied that the hole was closed, she looped the thread into a knot and snipped off the end, impressed that he didn't look like a piece of patchy artwork.

She swabbed around the wound, threw the cotton into a bowl next to her knees and stood up.

She shrugged the gloves off, dropped them into the same bowl, pushed past Sam and stormed out the room.

Sam found Andy scrubbing her hands in the bathroom, her flesh bright red as she tried to wash away something that wasn't there.

Sam leaned over the basin and closed the faucet, the steam hovering over her hands telling him that she hadn't even bothered to turn on the cold water.

"Stop". Sam reached out for her hands as they continues to run over each other harshly.

Her face turned towards him and he could see the untold emotions written in her eyes.

"Cops put bullets in them?". Her voice was cold and void of anything other than anger.

"No, the competition did".

She seemed surprised by his answer.

"I swear" he added reading the doubt that ebbed into her dark orbs.

"Thank you". Came out too, his voice sounding genuinely thankful for what she had done.

Andy pulled her hands out from under his, the burning turning into a chill.

Andy moved to walk away, but Sam countered her movements by stepping in front of her.

"I know that must have been hard...".

"Hard? You have no idea Sam. What if it gets infected? Or it goes septic?".

Sam couldn't help but find her response amazing.

She had to do something that was completely out of her comfort zone, and she was worried that Lars would get an infection.

"What if he doesn't?".

"Sam, I'm not a nurse, I put holes like that in bad guys, i don't fix them".

"Have you?". For some inexplicable reason, that was just something he needed to know. Wanted to know. He was drawn to knowing of she had the courage to pull the trigger.

He knew that she was trained too, but had she ever been able too?

"Not yet".

Her answer appeased him, his wondering converting to a lighter feeling at knowing she hadn't had to shoot someone.

Yet.

He had, and it always left a fleeting feeling behind.

"How many?" Andy suddenly blurted.

"Three".

Andy sucked in a sharp breath, like his answer had winded her, like she was expecting him to say none.

She pulled away slightly, her movements noted by Sam.

"It doesn't change who I am". He said dryly as he watched a plague of deep and dark feelings envelope her.

The thought sickened Andy as she heard his word.

Three lives, taken by his hands.

And only one though seemed to linger behind as she stared at him, every night that she had been here, she had slept next to a killer.

***** Okay, so who's still here?**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna© **


	9. Sleeping With The Enemy

**Wow, you guys have been totally amazing! Thanks for all the awesome reviews & follows!**

**Really didn't expect this to be that well liked! **

**Thanks as always to kelly2727 & all the regulars!**

**Chapter 9- Sleeping With The Enemy. **

She was judging him, judging his actions; he could see it in her eyes.

She might not have meant too, but she was even if it was subconsciously.

And it wasn't how he wanted her to see him.

"Don't pity me". Yup, that totally slipped out, and harshly too. It was only because she was looking at him with so much pity that it made him wish he hadn't just told her.

But she was wondering.

He didn't lie, it was one thing that was totally against his principals. He could see her questions filling her eyes, so he answered, and it was blunt but it was the truth.

"I don't. I pity the people that you killed". She snapped back coldly.

Andy moved around Sam as she left the bathroom and made it into the bedroom.

He found her curled up into a ball on the bed, after taking a minute to pull himself together. Her face was angled towards the wall, away from him. She didn't want to look at him right now.

He closed the door that led upstairs and locked it. He set his gun down on the bedside table next to his side of the bed after checking that the safety was on.

Sam toed his shoes off, and left them where they fell with loud thuds next to the bed.

His actions could be deemed careless and reckless, leaving a loaded gun in full view of her, knowing that she knew how to use one. But she wouldn't - his gut told him that, and he always trusted his gut.

She was too fragile, too sweet and soft to use it to get out of here. And she wasn't stupid, she knew she was out gunned upstairs.

That was a whole lot of trust he had in her.

He sank down on his end of the bed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

How was it even possible for one person so frustrating?

And so appealing at the same time.

She just had the ability to make him want to be brutally honest and totally open; only thing was - he didn't think that she could handle the truth. Well, the unabridged version anyway.

"First guy pulled on me and fired. I hit him first because he couldn't shoot straight. Second guy broke into my house and tried to stab me while I was sleeping. He sliced up my pillow. The third one..."

This one was harder to admit than the first two. It was one he thought about everyday.

"The um... The third one was a friend that crossed sides and lines. He took a little girl and when we... stopped at his house, he fired first and hit me. But I always had better aim".

Andy had rolled over to face Sam's back as he spoke, her mind pondering why he was sharing the personal information with her.

He didn't seem like the type.

He was more the silent type, and he definitely was the secret keeping kind of person.

He had probably come clean when he figured that he had better sleep with one eye open if she thought he was a murderer.

Andy's face softened as she listened to him explain, when he turned slightly to see her. He wanted to know what was going on in her head, by reading her eyes.

For some reason he needed her to know the truth, he didn't want her looking at him like she had a few seconds ago.

"I'm sorry". Her voice broke through the quiet that loomed between them.

It astounded him that she would so freely give him an apology for something that he had gone through that had absolutely nothing to do with her.

She said the words like she was really remorseful that he had to endure that kind of experience.

"Don't be". Sam uttered without looking at her; he's seen enough so he looked away.

"Was she okay? The little girl?".

What was with this woman? She apologizes for something out of her control, and so passionately worries about someone she's never met. And so genuinely.

After that, Andy stayed distant.

It was as though she had changed, and became more withdrawn.

Sam left her cuff off, he didn't think that she would suddenly lunge at him. And she knew that they were in the middle of nowhere, so running was out of the question.

When he was with her, she hardly carried a conversation, and answered with minimal words when she was spoken too.

It was grinding his guts.

Over days she seemed to give up, losing her fire and spunk as she spiraled into a quiet mouse.

Most of the time, like now; she had curled up on the bed and watched TV in silence, her attention focused solely on the images dancing across the screen.

She had been this way for five days and Sam was really having a hard time dealing with the new Andy.

He missed the old one.

He really liked the old one.

The one that couldn't be quiet for longer than ten seconds, the one that would even talk to the TV. The one that would initiate a conversation with him about the most ridiculous topic and turn it into an intellectual conversation.

He missed the Andy that laughed so freely at him when he told her a bad joke.

She had drifted off to sleep a while ago, the slow methodical rise and fall of her chest telling him that she was settled under the wings of sleep.

He survived on minimal hours of sleep, so if he woke up he would lay still and watch her.

It creeped him out completely, that he was starting to watch her sleep, but soon it was an addiction he just didn't want to give up.

He would allow himself to watch her eyes flutter behind closed lids when she was dreaming, or the way she would sigh and pucker her lips before she would roll over. Or how she would sweep her hair out of her face, even in her sleep, if her hair was loose.

He hated that she was here, going through this; but right now there wasn't another choice but to keep her here.

He let his mind run over collective thoughts, his imagination even going so far as to briefly wonder what it would have been like if they met under different circumstances.

Andy felt an incredible heat surrounding her, like she was being engulfed by flames.

It spread over her hand, and up her arm all the way up to her face. Her right side was enthralled in the heat too, her leg and even her left foot.

Forcing herself to wake up, Andy jerked herself awake; her eyes flying open to hear her name called softly.

When her vision focused, and her head lifted a little, Sam's face came into focus, and it was much too close to her own to be considered normal.

A low chuckle sounded in her ear, a vibration under her as it emanated out of Sam's lips.

"Comfy?". He added when he saw the shock slip over the confusion on her face.

Andy looked down to find herself laying on Sam, she had been using him as a pillow.

"Warm up yet?".

Andy pulled away, right over to her own side of the bed, in one fluid motion, a mortified look on her face.

"Not funny!". She hissed out at his amusement.

From his words she gathered that she had been cold during the night; and no longer cuffed to the bed she had crept closer seeking warmth. And she had obviously told him something to the effect of that when he realized what she was doing.

"I'm not complaining".

When Andy looked back up at Sam, she found a fully fledged dimpled grin.

It was the first time she had seen him really smile, and up until now she hadn't even been aware that he had dimples.

"Jerk". Andy mumbled getting off the bed, the name calling half intended in regards to him hiding those dimples, and the other at herself for letting him actually wrap himself around her while she was sleeping.

Sam raised an eyebrow when she slammed the bathroom door closed, another chuckle escaping him as he shook his head.

She really was something else.

He had woken up when she had shifted closer, and curled up into his side.

He had tried to wake her up and get her to move away before she fully woke up and freaked out when she found him that close, and had the wrong idea.

She had mumbled that she was cold and slid closer, before she snuggled up and went back to sleep.

After that; Sam lay staring at the ceiling unable to sleep.

Yup, this was definitely comfortable.

Andy wet her face with cold water, it was like liquid ice but she didn't care.

She really needed it right now.

Lifting her head, she stared at herself in the mirror, water droplets still clinging to her face.

She had no idea what she was thinking, moving closer to Sam in her sleep.

Oh riiiggghhhtttt!

She hadn't been thinking, because she was sleeping.

How many times had she done it now that her cuff was off? More than this once? Did she only know about it now because Sam was so busted?

When she came out of the bathroom, Sam was missing. Thankfully.

But his absence did little to get the embarrassment to die down.

She was ambling at round the room blushing, really happy that he wasn't here to see it.

It was something he really did not need to know. That he made her blush.

"You still won't admit it will you?". Bobby's voice whispered in his ear as he poured coffee into his travel mug.

Sam's eyes gave her a hardened stare, willing her to say one more word. Just daring her too.

"I can see it, so I just don't get why you won't... Do anything about it".

"Look at you, you know how hard this is right? And you're a lot stronger than she is". Sam whispered back, earning a groan from Bobby.

"Sam, that's different and you know it".

"How is it any different? She's not cut out for this".

"I need you to bring back more milk this time, need a list?". Bobby's voice was suddenly much louder, telling Sam that their private conversation was over.

"I think I got it". Sam said as though they were having an average conversation about re-stocking the kitchen.

A soft knock on the door made Andy look up to find it swing open and Bobby's smiling face lurking behind it.

"Coming up? The guys left so we're alone".

Andy nodded before standing up and following Bobby upstairs.

Sam eyed Lars in the rear view mirror as he drove them into town.

Damian wanted to get supplies before things got too busy or risky.

They elected on taking two cars, one for supplies and the truck for wood from the supplier just outside of town.

Sam, Elliot and Lars would be getting the supplies while Scott went with Damian to get the wood, and then they'd all meet up at the diner for breakfast.

Lars was jumping out of his skin at a chance to go to the diner in town, he was sweet on the waitress and they had always openly had a connection since the first time he went there with Sam and Damian.

Sam remembered the kids face when the waitress smiled his way and walked into another customer because she wasn't paying attention to where she was going. That was the first time they met.

That was almost a year ago, a few weeks after they found him.

That night they had; had a meeting at a club in Toronto city centre with guys interested in buying AK-47's from South Africa. When they left Bobby heard moaning coming from an alley so she asked Sam to take a look.

Sam found Lars badly beaten and barely alive, so Bobby adopted him and made the guys take him home, where she patched him up and got him back to healthy.

Lars was a good kid, kept his nose clean, followed orders and always addressed Bobby as 'Ma'am' and Sam as 'Sir'.

It was his way of showing respect.

Damian had let Bobby keep her stray, because they didn't have kids and he knew it was one thing she wanted. Desperately.

"Buy her a giant pink teddy bear" Sam suddenly blurted out when Lars caught him staring in the mirror.

"Sir?". The kid was clearly confused, his green eyes furrowed under a mop of unruly sandy-brown hair.

"She has a kid Lars, get the kid a teddy bear. Biggest one you can find".

The waitress had slammed into Sam a while ago and dropped her bag; emptying its contents all over the floor.

Helping her pick up the scattered items, Sam noticed a small pink monkey, the size of his hand and a pink baby rattle.

She had a daughter, why else would she carry baby toys in her handbag? Only a mother would do that.

It also explained why she always looked so tired and always breezed in the door running late.

She was a tired, single mom, struggling to make a life for herself and her kid.

Lars wasn't the kind of kid to be distanced by the fact that the girl he was sweet on had a kid; as long as the dad wasn't in the picture.

He wouldn't poach territory.

"Yes! Thank you Sir". Lars said as if Sam had given him he key to finding a reason to really talk to the girl. They'd talked, but obviously that wow factor was still missing- the one that would prove he was interested.

They stopped at the store for supplies and gave their order, they'd be back after breakfast to pick it up.

Sam added some candy bars to the giant pink and white teddy bear that Lars decided on before they left for the diner.

Her face was priceless when Lars handed it to her. It was almost as big as she was, and the sudden appearance of watery eyes told him that nobody had ever made such a heartfelt gesture towards her or her kid.

The others arrived, Damian joining Sam and Elliot at their table, while Scott and Lars filled another.

After they got their coffees and ordered their food, Damian set about talking business.

He was still pissed with the fact that the Russians were trying to move in on their deal with the Chinese. That's how they ended up getting shot.

But the Chinese had set up another meeting with Damian, they disapproved of the way the Russians behaved and did business.

Only problem was, it had been moved to another three weeks away.

"I wanna cut the kid". Sam said looking in Lars' direction.

"Why?". Damian didn't sound annoyed by Sam's request.

"Look at him. Give him his cut, and a legitimate car, and cut him loose. Let him take the girl and start over".

Damian stared at Sam. He had never seen a soft side of Sam, except the night that Sam got into it with Scott because of the cop.

"He's Bobby's stray".

"But he's a good kid. He won't snitch, not when he has something to lose".

"Giving him a cut now is gonna set us back Sammy" Damian was always business first.

"We've got three weeks. We pull another job, and we still have Tony's cut. We just need something small, and the cars and we're good to go".

Damian was thinking over Sam's words. They made sense.

They were planning on stealing three cars for the movement of the shipment, then they would trade it to their own, and leave town with minimal possessions and their cargo.

That was the plan.

"And your girl?". This time it was Elliot that asked the question.

"She's not my girl. And... She stays".

"Thank you". Andy said as she left the table after breakfast.

Bobby always made good food, and they always made sure that Andy was fed. If it wasn't her, then it was Sam.

In the sixteen or so days Andy had been here, she had only seen pizza once, the rest of the time it was a home cooked meal.

Her laundry also always magically disappeared out the bathroom and returned clean to the top of the drawers.

"So, why are you so mad at Sammy?". Bobby asked as she set the dirty dishes in the sink and turned on the water to wash them.

"I'm not".

Andy's answer made Bobby giggle.

"How long have you been here?". Andy changed the subject as she handed Bobby her dirty plate.

"Couple years".

Ouch, that was not what Andy wanted to hear.

"Look, things are really complicated right now, but..."

Andy didn't like the sentence hanging on 'But'.

"Sometimes things just need a little time to adjust you know".

Andy nearly dropped the pan she was intending on holding out to be washed.

"We're leaving in a few weeks anyway...". Bobby trailed off sadly.

"Leaving?". Andy spluttered the word out.

"Yup, moving on".

Andy didn't say much in reply, she didn't really have anything to say to it.

She had a wave of insecurity pass over her as well as a few random feelings that she couldn't name.

Except maybe the one that she could label a sense of missing.

Like she would miss this. Miss Sam.

"Would you come with us if he asked you too?".

Bobby was watching Andy carefully as she asked the question.

But Andy shook her head no.

"I have a life, a job, family and friends".

"You have Sam too" Bobby said before turning away.

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	10. Time Alone

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**Chapter 10- Alone Time. **

Andy spent a bit more time upstairs before going back down to Sam's room.

Yup, it was suddenly Sam's room. Not the their room, or their bathroom she had been using in her mind.

She was mad, and she had no idea why, so therefore, it was his- and his alone.

She had lost the feeling of wanting to hear anymore about Sam or the fact that they were going to pack up and leave her here soon, so retreating and hiding out alone was all there was to do.

They were leaving her right?

From Bobby asking her if she would tag along if Sam asked her too, she guessed that they were going to leave her behind.

Then there was the other option.

The knowledge caused more confused and worried feelings to run through Andy. She shouldn't be feeling them, so the guilt at actually feeling them unraveled her as the first signs of weakness began to show as she crumbled.

The first tears streaked down her face since she had been... Since she left home.

She wasn't taken, she volunteered to be here, so saying she was taken just didn't fit. At all.

Sam found Andy asleep when they made it home, Bobby telling him that he should go and talk to her the minute he set foot back in the door, arm's laden with bags full of groceries.

"What did you do?". Was his immediate response when he saw that Bobby wasn't looking like her usual bubbly self.

"Nothing. She's just sad. She likes you, you know".

Sam rolled his eyes before setting the bag down and making his way downstairs. The guys would have to finish up alone.

Andy knew when he came into the room, she just had a creepy way of knowing when he was there. Whenever he had been out, or just upstairs and she had fallen asleep, she would wake up no matter how quietly he came into the room.

She held her pose, and tried to keep her breathing paced, while she pretended to still be asleep.

She felt him sit down on the end of the bed, the mattress shifting under his weight as he perched himself next to her feet.

Sam kept his head down, he knew that she was awake, he could always tell when she was.

She just had an inability to lie, and pretend.

Maybe it was best to say this when she thought he thought she was sleeping.

But nothing seemed too want to come out of his mouth.

So he just sat there.

And she lay waiting.

"We're leaving in a couple weeks" he finally mumbled, Andy doing her best not to cringe when he finally admitted it.

"I'll be leaving you here, and I'll leave my phone, so you can call... Whoever you need to call to come get you".

Who would she call? A friend? 911? A husband, or sibling? Or another relative.

"But you need to wait a few hours".

He heard Andy try and keep her breathing calm, but she was failing miserably. She was still scared, she hadn't quite been able to build up the trust that he wanted her to have in him.

Like the trust he found himself unwillingly extending to her.

"You'll be going home

soon, so you should be happy". Sam stood up off the bed but still hovered.

Andy rolled over and looked at Sam like she was miserable about what she had just heard.

She shouldn't look like that, all 'I just lost my puppy' like.

"Were you going to tell me, or just leave me here?". She finally asked, her voice betraying her as it cracked a little under the pressure.

"Andy...".

What was he supposed to say?

That he didn't want to leave her? That he wanted to take her with him? Because he honestly did.

But he couldn't.

"It's complicated". Yeah, that was a great way for him to finish that sentence.

But Andy just rolled over and pulled the covers up over her head, mumbling "Go away Sam" as she did.

When Sam made it back upstairs, he found Bobby looking disheveled and like she had been crying as she slammed the groceries into the kitchen cupboards.

"He told you?".

Bobby nodded, but didn't answer.

"Dam told me that you asked". She said as she suddenly froze after slamming a can of coffee down onto the wooden shelf so hard that everything else on it shook.

"Bobby.."

"You're right. He has a chance to get out and stay a good kid Sam".

She had been a good mother figure for Lars since he had been here.

They found out that he was living on the street, his mother was a junkie and he had no idea who his father was.

They had a close bond, and even though Lars had only been here for a year, Sam could tell that Bobby felt like she was letting her only child go.

"I asked him if he wanted to go, and you know what he said? He said that if you and I give our approval, he'll go. When I asked about the girl he said he would ask her but if she said no, he was leaving anyway if we let him go".

"But he wants her to say yes". Bobby carried on pulling items out the bag and stuffing them into the cupboard.

"I asked him what he wanted her to say, and he said he wants a yes Sam. And that she's got a kid? He's just a kid. He's not ready for life on his own".

"Bobby, it's time to let him go. He's eighteen, he's not a kid anymore. He knows how tough life is, and if he's willing to take a woman with a kid and give them a better life, let him try. He looks at her like Damian looks at you".

Sam knew that she would have a tough time letting go, but he never figured on her giving this much of a fight.

But she wasn't a selfish person.

"He wants to leave tonight".

"Then go with him when he goes to get the girl. He's not like us, he's going to ask her, not take her. See for yourself".

Damian had obviously told Lars that he had the option to walk away, and that it had to be before things got worse, so he was opting for now, before he changed his mind. The weather wasn't that great either, with more snowfall predicted, it was best to leave before they got snowed in.

"Think he'll be okay?".

"Yeah, I do".

Looking at movement that caught the corner of his eye, Sam noticed Lars lingering just outside the doorway.

"Got a minute?". The kid looked so nervous asking that.

"I get what you're doing, but it doesn't feel wrong you know. When we got shot I was scared, and I saw how scared you were, because of Damian, and I can't do this. I'm not jaded enough. I want to go, but I want to stay too. Is that wrong?". Lars spoke and sounded so sad.

"I say you should go, get your girl and make a better life for yourselves". Sam said, his eyes focused on Bobby as he spoke. He knew that saying that would come back to haunt him.

"He's right. But I want to see her". Bobby spoke up sounding a little like an over anxious mother.

"Will you come with me?".

Bobby nodded, but Sam looked away. He wasn't going to go out the house with Bobby and leave Andy here with the guys, although Elliot was a good guy, Damian sent him everywhere with Bobby, unless he went himself.

If Bobby and Lars were going that meant that Damian would too, so Scott would be left here- not even considered as an option.

"Can I say thanks to her?". Lars shocked Sam with the question, but he had good manners.

Andy had only been up in the house with everyone the night they came home shot, other than that; she was downstairs.

No-one ever went downstairs, besides Bobby.

Sam nodded and moved downstairs, Andy might get a fright if Lars just barged in.

Sam knocked on the door knowing that it would alert Andy to another presence.

When he pushed the door open, Andy was still cocooned under the covers, but sitting up this time- her attention focused on the door.

"Hi". Lars said as he followed Sam into the room, stopping just inside the doorway.

Andy lifted her hand up in a small wave, a light smile tugging her lips up. She hadn't seen him since she stitched him up although she had asked Sam how he was. She was worried about him, even though he was a part of the crew that kept her locked in a room.

"I just wanted to say thank you, you know, for what you did".

Andy was looking at Lars strangely, like she had a million questions to ask him, but her mouth stayed mute.

"I'm leaving, so thank you Ma'am. And look after Sammy here".

With that Lars walked off, leaving Andy staring at his retreating form.

"Where's he...". She cut the words off, not really wanting to know the answer to her question. The less she knew, the better right?

"He's going to get his girl, then he's out of this life. Gonna keep his nose clean".

Sam's posture was tense and defensive, like he was trying to hold back any emotions from visibly displaying.

"Why are you letting him go?".

"He's a good kid, he deserves a chance".

Andy wondered if Sam had ever been given an out. And why he wouldn't have taken it.

"So he can leave just like that?"

Andy and her questions.

It sometimes drove him insane.

"Yup".

"Then why are you still here? Why haven't you left yet?".

Andy's eyes widened at her question, the second the words were out.

Sam's face dropped a little, so she knew that she had said it out loud. Her inner voice totally forgetting the filter.

"Don't answer that, I know. It's complicated right?" Andy snapped.

Sam nodded.

"Okay". Andy said and flopped back down on the bed, leaving Sam to leave the room again, this time slamming the door behind him.

"Problem?".

"Nope". Sam took the beer that Bobby was holding out and took a long sip.

He really wasn't the door slamming type.

"She's getting to you".

"No, she's not".

"Need me to make you guys dinner?" Bobby had the sense to change the subject, Sam wasn't good company when he was brooding.

"Who's staying?".

"Just you and Andy. Damian's taking me out after we drop Lars off, and the guys are going to stay in town after hitting some clubs. We'll probably stay overnight too".

Great, just what he needed.

A night alone with Andy that wasn't constricted to the confines of the room downstairs.

"Nope, I'll sort it out later".

"I'm sure you will". Bobby said teasingly as she walked out of the room.

Hours later, Sam ventured downstairs yet again in an attempt to call a truce with Andy.

He had taken her coffee, but she didn't touch it. Bobby made sandwiches for lunch, and Andy's still stood untouched next to the bed.

Everyone had left, so she could freely move through the house but it didn't seem like she wanted to do anything except lay in bed and do a bad impersonation of someone sleeping.

The last time he headed upstairs, he left the door open; but she never followed.

"Dinners done" he said hovering again. He wasn't the hovering kind of person, but with her he just did it.

It was in his nature when it came to her.

Andy didn't reply, so he walked over and yanked the blankets right off the bed, sending them into a heap on the floor.

"Are you crazy?" Andy hissed, sitting up and leering at him.

Her fire was back and it made him smile.

"I said..."

"I heard what you said"

See, a simple action from him earned him a reaction from her.

"Move, upstairs now". Sam added, trying to keep his dimples from flaring.

Her exasperated look was enough to make him want to flash them around.

"No".

That threw him for a loop.

Her flat out no.

Since she had been here, she had never used the word, or defied anything she was asked or told to do, and she had also never asked for anything- except to shower or use the bathroom.

"I wasn't asking". Sam reached out for her and scooped her up before she had a chance to back away.

Within seconds the world tilted and turned upside down, Sam slung her over his shoulder and she didn't even have a chance to put up a fight.

Sam carried her up the stairs and set her down in front of the table in the far corner of the lounge.

Andy spun around, and nearly slipped on the wooden floors because she was only wearing socks. She never got the chance to put her slippers on.

Sam's hand shot out to steady her, an amused grin playing on his lips as he noticed her inability to keep herself balanced.

He let go as soon as she was steady, her eyes flashing across the room.

"They're out". Sam said reading her thoughts.

"Oh".

Sam gestured towards the table, dinner already set out.

"You made dinner?". She sounded like she didn't believe that he was capable of completing the task.

Sam nodded, and motioned towards the table.

Andy sat down, the aroma of something delicious assaulting her senses.

She dished up, and began eating silently, her eyes focused on her plate to prevent another slip of the inner voice blurting out something that should be kept inside her head.

They were halfway through dinner, when the lights flickered a little and dimmed.

Before going out completely.

The room plunged into darkness, Andy staring vacantly ahead of her as she let out a groan and cursed the universe simultaneously.

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	11. Trouble

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**Chapter 11- Trouble. **

Andy's fork clattered down into her plate, as they were plunged into sudden darkness, her groan filling the room loudly.

A string of curses flew out of Sam's mouth, Andy's mouth dropping open when she heard them.

"Stay put". He mumbled before she heard him move away.

The house was really dark with the lights off, any object becoming barely visible.

Andy could hear Sam shuffling around, his footsteps echoing loudly as he crossed the room until she heard nothing.

It wasn't long before Sam was back, his footsteps growing closer as he neared Andy, echoing loudly as his shoes met the wooden floor.

She still couldn't see him, but felt his hand on hers as he took hold of it and pulled it so that she would stand up.

He kept hold of it; tightly, leading her towards the back section of the house where she hadn't been other than to use the bathroom the day she attempted to escape.

Turning the corner, Andy found a brightly lit room, flames dancing around in the fireplace as they flickered and lit up the room into a toasty red hue.

"Stay here". Sam said letting her hand slide out of his before he disappeared into the shadows again.

When she was sure that Sam was gone, she lifted her hand up and stared at it, it was like she could still feel his fingers wrapped around her hand.

Andy took in the room, a second lounge hidden from view.

It had huge lounger couches in it, and was scarcely decorated.

But the warmth emanating from the fireplace made the room hospitable.

Andy got comfy on the floor, leaning against the couch, her feet stretched out towards the fire as she let them roast in the heat, her toes wiggling back and forth in her socks as they warmed up.

It was a while before Sam came back, carrying bags of wood and a bottle of whiskey tucked under his arm.

"Blackout" he said throwing the wood down in the corner next to a neatly stacked pile already waiting to be thrown in the fire.

Sam stopped and stood still, taking the sight of Andy in.

She was a beautiful woman, he had spent hours taking the sight of her in, mostly when she was sleeping.

But she wasn't the kind of beauty that had men drooling over her, she was the natural kind. The one that was down to earth and simple.

The kind that was beautiful because of who she was.

It radiated off of her.

He noticed that about her the first time he looked into her eyes when she sat on his lap in the car. Her big brown eyes were so spirited.

She hadn't been wearing makeup that day; not that she needed it.

Now seeing her like this, it was way more than he bargained on.

Sam huffed out a breath before leaving again, after stopping long enough to hand Andy the bottle of whiskey.

When Sam came back, Andy had the bottle to her lips, a low chuckle sounding from behind the pile of blankets he had cradled in his arms.

If the power was out, the heating was out; so that meant that it was going to get colder. So he went downstairs, grabbed all the bedding and brought it up here.

She really was his kind of girl, drinking out the bottle.

Wait what?

That thought was enough to make Sam throw the blankets down on the couch, along with the pillows before retreating from the room again.

Sam found another bottle of whiskey in the kitchen and opened it, a long sip burning its way down as he swallowed.

His kind of girl.

Yup, that had been a totally random thought that should never have come to light.

What the hell was he thinking? Or rather he wasn't thinking.

He stood in the kitchen, trying to get his shit together.

After another sip of whiskey, his feet were moving, back towards Andy who was now huddled under a blanket in front of the fire.

"You can sleep here, they won't be back. Just keep adding wood, it'll burn all night".

With that he was out the room, whiskey bottle in hand.

He needed time to think thoughts other than the ones currently streaming through his mind right now.

He couldn't stay here, like this. It would just end badly.

He heard Andy's feet patter on the floor as she chased after him, all the way to the front of the house where he sat down in the dark on the cold couch.

"Owww, crap". Andy stammered, so Sam figured she had probably stubbed a toe on something.

"Sam?". She whispered out, and he had no idea why. They were alone, so she didn't need to be quiet.

"Yeah?".

His voice drew her attention and she found him on the couch, barely visible.

"Where are you going?". She sounded like she was panicking, like she thought he was going to leave her in the house alone.

"Just here".

"Why?".

He so was not about to answer that question, so he kept quiet.

"Sam?".

"Yeah?".

"Please don't leave me up here alone".

Okay, that part he hadn't figured on. That she would be scared to be in the house alone.

He felt her hands seek him out, her finger just missing his eye as she let her hand find his shoulder and slide down his arm until she found his hand.

"Please?".

How could he say no to that?.

He let himself be dragged to his feet, and led back towards the other lounge, Andy looking at their hands still clasped together before she suddenly let it go.

She sped away, and resumed her position huddled under the blanket in front of the fire.

Sam took up a spot on the couch to her right, a bad choice of seat considering that she was directly in his line of vision.

And he just couldn't help but stare at her.

He watched her take another sip from the whiskey bottle, her face scrunching up as she swallowed.

She knew enough about drinking neat whiskey when it was cold to know that it would warm her up.

They sat there in silence, just like that; Andy watching the flames dance, and Sam watching Andy.

He thought back over Bobby's words, from a few days ago when she found him daydreaming.

"You like waking up to her don't you".

The problem wasn't what she said, it was that what she said was true.

Since then Sam knew that he was in trouble, that things were getting more complicated than he had ever anticipated them being.

And it wasn't that he didn't like the idea, he just wasn't ready for it.

"... Leaving?".

He had totally zoned out and only caught the last word as Andy's voice slipped through the fog in his brain.

"I'm sorry what?".

"When are you leaving?". Her voice sounded unbelievably sad asking that.

"Three weeks".

She didn't answer.

In fact after that she didn't say anything.

Sam wondered if she had drifted off, so he put his bottle of whiskey down and moved over to her and crouched down.

She turned to face him the second he was eye level with her and just stared at him, the reflection of the flames flickering in her eyes making them a lighter shade of gold rather than dark brown.

"You should um...". Sam said gesturing towards the couch behind her.

She really wouldn't be comfortable sleeping on the floor.

Sam stood up and held out his hand, Andy setting her own bottle of whiskey down on the floor before reaching out to take his hand.

As soon as she moved to stand up, her feet tangled up in the blanket she had wrapped around herself, once again throwing her balance out the window.

The second she collided with Sam she knew that she was in more trouble than she could have imagined.

Sam caught her again, his hands bracing the top of her arms as he steadied her out.

He looked down to find her looking up at him, expecting a hint of embarrassment to adorn her face, but instead there was a whole lot more going on, and embarrassment wasn't it.

Without thinking Andy reacted.

It wasn't premeditated, or overthought, it just happened.

The moment was just suddenly there, every fiber of her being electrified when she fused her lips to his.

But Sam let out a groan and pulled back, his eyes closed as he lifted his head and let out a sigh.

When he opened his eyes, Andy was watching him, a stoic mask on her face. He couldn't read one single thing going on in her head right now.

"Not gonna happen, Andy McNally". Sam said before adding space between them by dropping his hands from her arm's and stepping back.

"But...".

Sam lifted a hand up, his head cocking to the side a little as he tried to select carefully thought words.

"Girls like you and guys like me, don't go together".

Yeah, that was his awesome defense.

"Guys like you?"

Andy stood defiantly in front of him, her arm's crossing her chest as she waited for an answer.

Sam jammed his hands into his pockets, this really wasn't how he planned on having his night go.

"You're a copper, I'm a criminal. Do you know what I do Andy?".

The edge in his voice made Andy shiver, he seemed so cold suddenly.

She shook her head, because the only thing she knew about his line of work was the fact that he had robbed a bank.

"I run drugs and guns".

He was being brutally honest with her, that's what he was doing. Oh, and robbing banks and stealing money, but she already knew that part.

Andy looked away, before looking back at him, her eyes blinking rapidly to hold back the ugly truth he had just uttered.

It made him feel sick; the way she was looking at him right now. It was worse than the times she had looked at him like that before.

She looked like she wanted to cry, and he never wanted to make her shed tears.

He had the urge to envelope her in a hug, and tell her that everything would be okay, but he knew that it would only be him making empty promises.

It would also be him deciding not to let her go.

Yup, he was in way over his head, and it was too late to back out now.

That was also a flaw in the plan- it wasn't a case of having to let her go, it was a case of when he would have too.

Andy stood in front of him, just looking at him, until she suddenly shook her feet free of the hindering blanket and stepped out of it.

She crossed the space between them in three small steps, before reaching out for Sam again, determination wrapped around her features.

This time Sam let her kiss him, let her get it out of her system.

He knew he was playing with fire, and that he would get burned, but her kisses were addictive.

He pulled away again, and pursed his lips into a tight line, his head shaking slightly.

"Not gonna happen". He repeated.

He stepped away from Andy, this time leaving the room altogether.

He took a breather, and walked around the house under the pretense of checking that everything was locked.

He took his time, making the trip in slows tedious steps to waste time on nothing.

Andy sank down on the couch, the whiskey forgotten, as her mind tried to figure out what she was doing.

A whole lot of things made more sense while other things just made her more confused.

She shifted to lay down, and pulled the blankets up off the floor and shredded them out over her, letting her gaze get lost in the fire while her mind tried to make sense of what had just happened.

She must have dosed off, when her eyes opened; she found the room lit only by glowing embers.

She sat up, and noticed Sam sleeping stretched out on the other couch, his face glowing in the light from the fireplace.

Andy tossed off her blankets and got up, her hand sweeping the corner of the blanket up and dragging it across the floor.

Her movements roused Sam instantly, his head lifting up to seek her out while his lips whispered her name.

"I'm cold".

Sam shifted backwards and Andy slid onto the couch next to him wordlessly. His arm reached in behind his back and he yanked out the couches backrest cushions, before flinging them over the back to the floor behind the couch.

Andy shifted closer, as Sam settled back down.

The couch was broad, but still Andy was really close.

Sam kept his hands away, one under his head, the other on his own thigh, even though he really wanted to wrap an arm around Andy and tug her closer.

"You're not a bad guy". Andy suddenly whispered out.

Sam exhaled a deep breath, he really thought that they were past this.

His breath blew into Andy's hair and tickled her neck, a not so subtle shiver running through her.

He just seemed to have this damned effect on her.

Without thinking Sam reached out and pulled her backwards, drawing her a little closer, thinking that she was still cold.

His arm stayed glued where it was, holding her around the waist, his hand on her hip.

She didn't stiffen, or shrug his hand away, so he left it there, happy to live in the moment.

"Go to sleep" Sam mumbled again, his breath causing Andy to lift her shoulder up to scratch the tickle her hair had caused.

Sam's hand slipped off her hip and moved to brush her hair out of her neck, the silkiness of her hair making him smile as he let his fingers twine around the strands.

He knew how her hair felt, he had played with it the morning that she used him as a pillow. He lost the fight to leaving it alone and eventually gave up and let his fingers shift through her hair.

His fingers brushed away her hair as they grazed over the ivory skin on the back of her neck, another electric jolt pulling through his arm.

Everytime he had touched her skin, it was the same. That single moment of warmth and comfort racing up his arm.

That was another sign he had missed, until now. Now that he knew he was in trouble.

But there was no point, when she found out the truth; she would hate him.

**** looks like they're in trouble!

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	12. Missing You When You're Here

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**Chapter 12- Missing You When You're Here. **

Andy woke up to an empty couch behind her, but bigger flames blazing in the fireplace.

The couch behind her was still warmish, so Sam hadn't been gone long, a dent still in the pillow where his head had spent the night resting beside hers.

Wrapping the blankets around her she got up and carefully wobbled through the house, trying not to fall on her face.

She was still groggy with sleep, and her legs felt heavy, so they moved with cautious steps.

The kitchen was empty and so were the other rooms, so Andy hobbled down the stairs to Sam's room, cautiously hoisting the blanket up around her knees.

She heard the water running and knew that he was in the shower.

The electricity and heating were still off, so it was freezing, even though she saw that the sun was trying to make an appearance from behind the early morning, heavy snow clouds through the lounge windows when she navigated the room.

She couldn't even begin to imagine how Sam could shower in cold water. The idea of that was enough to make her shiver.

Sam came out the bathroom, a sliver of steam blowing out around him.

"It's hot!" Andy exclaimed in glee. She could really do with a hot shower now. The water had obviously stayed hot over night.

Sam nodded but didn't say anything, so she scrambled to get clean clothes and hit the shower.

When she came out, Sam was gone again. But she didn't find it surprising anymore.

Everytime she took a step closer, he backed off. If she backed off, he stepped closer.

It was enough to make her dizzy.

When she was dressed warmly, Andy reentered the house, the sound of closing car doors making her stop just as she reached the top of the staircase.

She hadn't seen Sam again, so she turned around, went back downstairs and closed the door behind her.

"Sammy". Bobby bounded into the house full of happiness.

Everyone was home, giving Sam a small amount of gratitude because there was a reason he could avoid Andy now.

"So?".

"So...Nothing".

"Sam!".

"Don't go there" Sam growled out, Bobby holding her hands up in surrender.

They had been home a while, but Bobby had held back on her questioning.

"You okay?". Sam asked Bobby after a while. She seemed really sad, but he understood why. And he was really quiet, and she knew the reason behind that.

"Yeah, I'm good. Really happy. He made a good choice to go".

"So did she say yes?".

Bobby nodded. "It was like the sweetest thing ever, do you know that he actually knew where she lived".

Sam chuckled, he guessed that Lars knew that.

"So he knocks on the door, and she opens it and he kisses her, just right there. She was holding the little girl, and then Lars just steps back and says 'Hi' like it was a regular thing".

Bobby looked really happy for the kid, like she approved of his choice too. Her smile glowed as she told Sam what had happened, a true sign that she was happy with herself too- for making the right decision and letting Lars go even if it was hard on her.

At least someone had made the right choice, and stood the chance of making their happy ever after come true. Without prison.

"She looks nice, but man is she stubborn. She first said no, and we're sitting there watching him sort of give up when the little girl just threw herself at him. Apparently she doesn't like many people".

"Probably the bear".

"The what?".

"Never mind". Sam forgot to tell Bobby about the bear, so he let it go.

"Eventually she said yes and packed a few things and they left. Damian gave him the new truck, so he's gone".

Sam smiled at knowing that at least one of them would have a chance at making something of themselves. Other than having to live looking over your shoulder and avoiding the cops. Lars was an intelligent kid, he'd make good on his freedom.

"So, the power been out long?"

"All night, should be back up soon".

"You didn't..."

"No I didn't hit the breaker, it went out all by itself".

Really? Bobby could seriously sometimes let her mind entertain some deranged thoughts.

"Hey I'm just checking".

Andy was flipping through TV channels.

She came out the shower, and found their bed made up.

That analogy sounded so weird, even in her head- Their bed.

Sam had obviously made it up while she was in the shower, but it escaped her attention when she had headed upstairs.

The whiskey she had been drinking stood with it's cap on next to her side of the bed, Sam had probably left it there as an indication that she might just need it if the power stayed out.

That would have meant that coffee wasn't an option.

Bobby soon appeared, carrying steaming hot coffee.

The power had come back on, not long after Andy had gotten out of the shower, the TV suddenly jumping to life, nearly giving Andy a heart attack.

"Hi". Bobby said as she sat beside Andy on the bed, her hand wrapped around her own coffee cup.

"Thank you" Andy said reaching for the coffee. She really needed it.

"So... How was your night?".

Andy resisted the urge to roll her eyes, this woman was just too nosy for her own good.

"I know, Sam told me".

"Told you?".

"That nothing happened".

Oh, yes, that.

"Andy, I know that it's hard being here, and that you feel like you don't belong. But you should stop screwing with his head".

That statement totally caught Andy off guard. And Bobby said it so easily.

Up until now, Bobby had been sweet and kind, now she was harsh and overbearing.

"I'm sorry, what?".

"Sam's head, you're screwing with it".

"I'm not".

Bobby was testing the theory, and so far, so good.

Pushing Andy's buttons using Sam as a weapon wasn't ideal, but it would be the only thing she could do now that time was running out.

"You don't know that you are, it's unintentional".

Andy stared at Bobby, her mind whirling over her own transparency.

"He feels it too, the connection, he just doesn't know how to handle it. Sammy doesn't do relationships, he's been here for two years, and never had the inclination to bring a woman home, or go looking for one".

Andy was having trouble listening to this, it really didn't have anything to do with her.

"I...".

"Look, I'm just saying... I dunno what I'm saying, but things are going to get hot real quick, and I don't know you well enough to trust you, but Sammy does. Not enough, but it'll do for now. Just remember that".

As soon as her words were cold, Bobby was gone, leaving a dazed and confused Andy sitting staring at a closed door.

After Bobby left, Andy lost herself to deep thoughts.

She ran every clear memory through her mind, scrutinizing it to see if there was any truth behind Bobby's words.

But she kept coming up empty.

She couldn't find anything that told her that she was guilty of what Bobby was accusing her of.

And after last night, she seriously doubted that she was even capable of messing with Sam's head. He didn't seem like the type that would allow it anyway.

The following days passed with Andy retreating all the way into her shell. She was quieter than she had ever been, and avoided any kind of conversation whatsoever.

She didn't look at Sam when he was around, and her minimal answers had gone to quiet nods if he spoke to her.

That eventually stopped too.

Sam seemed darker to her, like he was angry, so she left him alone.

Andy also tried to stop sleeping at night, she tried to spend the days sleeping while Sam was gone. That was just easier, no risk of him being used as a pillow again.

She knowingly withdrew herself in every possible way she could.

Sam would sneak glances her way when he thought that she wasn't paying attention.

She just didn't talk anymore.

He kept coming and going to bring her food and coffee. He would disappear for hours and come back with candy bars and magazines and other inanimate objects that he thought she should have.

She would smile vaguely in thanks but that was it. That was all she gave him.

It was eating him alive.

Until one day he just snapped.

She had been mute for almost two weeks and he just couldn't handle it anymore.

The final preparations were being made for the exchange and he knew that his time with her was almost up, but he just couldn't let it go, couldn't leave her here hating him.

He'd had a bad day, Scott was looking for a fight but Sam was holding on to every morsel of self restraint he possessed. Bobby had asked him why he didn't ask Andy to leave with them; like giving her the option to come along would be better than just dragging her out the door.

He'd messed his own coffee on himself and had to change shirts, he ended up with a splinter in his finger when he brought more wood in, and now Andy was completely ignoring him.

He came down after everyone went to bed and brought Andy coffee. Her eyes followed him as he set it down next to her side of the bed, but no smile and no nod just pushed him over the edge.

"If this is about kissing..."

"It's not". Andy was back to using her confident tone, the one that first drew his attention outside the bank.

"Then what is your problem?".

Wow, that just came out all wrong.

"You". Andy cringed when she said that, telling Sam that; she hadn't meant it to leave her lips.

"Me?". It was shocking.

"Yeah Sam. You are the problem. You're hot and cold at the same time, then you're just willing to let me get close enough before you send in backup to warn me off. You know what... You need to grow a pair".

Andy had found her feet, they padded across the floor as she moved to walk away, her voice was angry enough to carry across the room.

She didn't wait for an answer, she escaped to the only place she had to go - the bathroom.

Just as she was about to close the door loudly, Sam's hand stopped it so Andy let go knowing that there was no point in trying to fight his strength.

"What the hell are you talking about?".

He stood in the doorway, watching as she squirted toothpaste onto the bristles of her toothbrush, her eyes watching him in the mirror.

"I'm not screwing with your head anymore, so just... Go do whatever it is you do". Andy seethed out as she turned just enough to face him.

"What?".

Andy stopped, he seemed genuinely confused.

Sam let out a loud groan, his hand running over his face in frustration.

Bobby.

"I never said that".

"Well, YOU didn't need too".

Sam leaned against the open door as Andy turned away, opened the faucet and began brushing her teeth.

He had missed her sassy side more than he would ever admit, but he was kind of in awe at how much passion she could muster in seconds when she was backing something she really believed in.

Andy caught him staring, by looking at him in the mirror and he couldn't help but smile at their whole setup.

It was like they were having the standard kind of argument that relationships have, and they were living together, and just...being normal.

"What?".

Andy had finished brushing her teeth, and faced him again, her hands moving to pull her hair into a ponytail.

He had lost himself to his thoughts and caught a glimpse of his own smile in the mirror when she spoke before he managed to school his features and switch on the autopilot.

"Nothing". Sam mumbled pushing off the door and leaving her to finish in the bathroom.

He was under the covers when she came out, his face aimed at the ceiling.

He left her bedside lamp on knowing that she wasn't about to get into bed and go to sleep.

She would read, or watch TV without the volume turned up.

She just completely avoided sleeping when he was in the room.

"I dunno what she said, she likes to meddle".

She surprised Sam by getting into bed and turning the light off, so he took the chance to apologize.

"Whatever she said, she shouldn't have I'm sorry".

Andy turned to face Sam. She had something to say, but was holding back.

"What?". Maybe letting her say it would end the mirth that dwelled around them.

"Do I? Screw with your head?".

Had she really just asked him that?

Sam was tempted to be truthful and say yes, but her reaction to that was just too unpredictable.

So he said "No" hoping that it sounded real enough. Not that she really screwed with his head, she was just in it all the time.

He wasn't lying, he was just protecting her from something that she probably couldn't handle.

*****Thanks for reading, don't forget to review!**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	13. Knowing

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**Chapter 13- Knowing. **

Sam woke up to Andy's head on his chest; her face tucked into his neck as she slept. Her breath blew out and tickled his skin, a rash of goosebumps adorning his skin from head to toe.

There was just something about her, and it was driving him insane.

Waking up with her that close, he felt better, he felt forgiven. Even though he really didn't deserve to be.

The last two weeks he hadn't been himself, he had been moody; but it was only because he felt like he was losing a piece of her when she withdrew into her shell. Like he was losing sight of the real her?

He stayed like that, letting Andy sleep while his hand tangled in the loose strands of hair that hung down her back and draped over her shoulder and his arm.

He had somehow managed to get his arm in under her while they were sleeping.

When Andy finally roused, she smiled sheepishly at Sam when she looked up, but just for a second.

Long enough for him to see her blush. Something else he had missed immensely while she was quiet.

She surprised him again when she put her head back down and stayed there.

Sam looked down at the back of her head, trying to imagine what her face looked like right now. He knew that he had a really smug expression on his own right now, but it didn't matter - His Andy was back.

Again with the possessive context.

But he just couldn't help it.

When Sam woke up again, Andy was still cushioned on his chest, holding him like she anticipated his departure again.

Because he kept doing that, but it was for the best.

He languished in her scent as he had missed that too, lately she hadn't been close enough for him to inhale it without him actually walking up to her and sniffing.

Like that wouldn't be really weird.

He was content to stay like this, but too soon Andy woke up again and moved away.

He'd never met someone that could sleep so much. She most likely did it to control the cabin fever and bordem too.

She was wearing a real smile as she slid off the bed and stretched out, no indication that she was still mad at him lingering anywhere on her features.

Her smile lit up her eyes as it played out on her lips until it suddenly drooped a little.

"What?". She had one eye narrowed at him as she asked, her nose scrunching up just a hint as she tried to brace herself for whatever answer she was about to receive.

"You're back". Sam said without thinking.

It earned him an exaggerated sigh and an eye roll before she walked off, yup she was definitely back.

They had nine days left until the exchange, until he would need to let her go.

The first two days were spent lounging around watching TV and helping Andy do crossword puzzles in her magazines.

Sam kept peering over her shoulder and tapping his finger on the page counting the blocks before giving her the answer. Eventually she shifted around and shared the magazine with him.

She was back, her laugh would sound through the room unexpectedly, or she would offer him a shy smile for no reason.

And it totally sucked!

On the third day Bobby announced that everyone was heading out into town for a breather before the exchange, Sam wondering if it was her idea of giving Andy a chance to get out of being stuck downstairs.

One last chance.

Sam had asked her why she told Andy that she was screwing with his head; her reply a simple 'Someone had too'. But it didn't explain much.

After that, Bobby left Andy alone,

She stayed away and avoided her at all costs.

Damian was still undecided on what they would do to get the rest of the cash they needed to meet the quota to fill the shortfall for the rest of cash, but soon enough something would come up.

Sam knew that he was leaving it to the last minute because he was following his gut.

When everyone left, Sam started dinner and it wasn't long before Andy ventured upstairs following her nose.

"So you can cook". She said leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed over her chest.

Sam had told her that they would be alone, and her reaction was not what he expected. Before he had needed to go down and get her, now she was confident enough to follow when she was ready.

He had come to learn that he underestimated her way too many times, and found out how unpredictable she could be when she stared at him and just burst out laughing.

He was kind of fazed by her reaction but guessed that she remembered the last time they had been left alone and she misbehaved. He just assumed that if she didn't see the funny side of it, she would be really embarrassed right now.

Sam smiled at her ability to so openly compliment a person, if her comment was anything to go by, his cooking was making her hungry.

Dinner passed pleasantly, Andy jumping up to do the dishes when they had finished eating.

Since their last night up in the house, Andy had avoided all talk about their departure. She would still think about it though, Sam could see it sprawled across her face when she did.

When the kitchen was cleaned up Sam motioned for her to follow and led her into the lounge with the fireplace. He had lit it so the room was already toasty and aglow.

She flopped down on the floor much like she had the last time, Sam sliding down next to her.

They sat in silence, each lost in their own thoughts until Andy just couldn't bite back the words anymore.

"What are you going to do when you leave here?"

Sam answered without looking at her. "What I've always done".

"You?" He added her gaze still focused on the flames.

"Go see my dad. Give Leo a huge hug. Put my uniform back on. Spend hours giving statements".

Andy had a dreamy face until she said the last part, that made her look down at her hands.

"Yeah? What you going to say?". That last part had really peeked his interest.

"That you're a good guy".

"Andy you need to tell them everything you know".

"But that's what I know. You guys didn't take me, I volunteered to come. You've kept me clothed and fed, stopped bad things from happening to me...".

"But you know that's not all there is to it right?".

"Sam, I don't know anything else. You told me that you're running drugs and guns, but I haven't seen anything. When you leave I don't even know where you're going".

"But you can't keep that quiet, you can't hide it".

Sam knew what she was doing. She was going to try make it less tough on him when he got arrested because she believed that this was how it was going to end.

"Besides, you don't lie very well". Sam didn't expect the pillow from the couch that she had tucked in her hands to hit him in the face.

They drifted back to silence after that; few words leaving their lips because they were content to just be.

Andy dozed off after a long while staring into the flames, so Sam lifted her up and set her down on the couch.

Her hand held on to his arm, so he climbed over her and slid under the covers that he had eventually gone to fetch downstairs. No point in waking Andy up to climb into a cold bed in a cold room; when it was perfectly warm right here.

The next morning Andy did a disappearing trick the second she woke up and heard movement coming into the house, with Sam still behind her on the couch. She was barely awake, but scooted downstairs before the others were all inside properly.

"Sammy, get your gear ready, the exchange has been moved up". Damian said as he found Sam stoking the fireplace a while after they had gotten back.

Sam's head snapped up, his jaw tensing a little.

"When?".

"Three days".

They had gone from eight days to less than half of that, a shiver running through Sam at the thought.

"Decided about her yet?".

"She stays". Nothing had changed. There was no way that he was taking Andy with them.

"You sure?".

"I'm sure".

Sam grabbed some fresh air after that, Bobby doing what she did best- coming to find him.

"So this is it".

"Yup".

"You don't look happy".

Sam didn't have anything to say.

"It's gonna be hard, letting go".

"I'm not letting anything go, that's mine to keep".

"Arg, Sam seriously? Are you blind or just stupid?".

Sam turned to face Bobby, he really wasn't on the same page as she was right now.

"She's fallen for you".

That made Sam go ice cold, his eyes boring into Bobby.

"No...".

Sam was shaking his head, like it would erase her words.

"Sam, I'm not kidding".

He knew she wasn't, Bobby didn't joke about things like that.

"She couldn't have...".

"She has. She's been here what just less than two months, but she has. You showed her the real you. How much time have you guys spent together? Think about it".

Sam needed to sit down.

Now.

So he did, right there on the snowed over stairs of the deck that led up to the house, his head hanging down as he tried to focus.

This could not be happening.

"You okay?".

"No".

"Sam, it doesn't have to be this way...".

"There isn't any other way".

"You've..."

"Don't you dare finish that sentence". Sam growled out.

He knew exactly what he'd done, he didn't need to hear it from someone else.

"This is going to end badly".

"I know".

Sam knew it was going too, because it wasn't just him and Andy that she was referring too.

Damian ran into an old business partner last night and they rekindled their business affiliation, the guy had enough cash to front for their shortfall, so he called the Chinese and made the arrangements.

Andy was brazen and ventured up into the house uninvited.

All eyes stared at her as she stood in the doorway watching them back.

Sam was watching Scott, as though he was about to pounce as they sat huddled over the table, various papers scarred all over it.

Bobby waved Andy over to the couch, where she sat reading a magazine that didn't seem to hold her attention to one page for long.

"They're working" Bobby whispered as Andy flopped down next to her.

"Oh".

Andy could feel Sam watching her from across the room, she always sensed when he was, even if she was sleeping.

Andy listened to the guys talk, some things making sense while other things just sounded obscure.

After a while she got up and went back downstairs, her need for conversation fading away as some blank spots began to be filled. If they were talking business, then things were really close to being put into play; which meant...

She couldn't even finish her trail of thought on that.

Sam found her sitting on the bed counting on her fingers, each time stopping on either, fifty-three or fifty-four before staring again.

"Fifty-four". Sam said as he made his way into the room and closed the door. He could tell you the hours, minutes and seconds too if you asked. He knew exactly how long she'd been here.

"So it's the twenty-first?".

Sam nodded.

He came down to give Andy the bedroom keys, they were heading out to jack some car's to move the shipment with.

They would come back, hopefully, and then pack up their gear tomorrow and get ready to fetch the shipment.

They would come back after that, just long enough to split the shipment between their three cars before leaving for good.

Andy's brow furrowed at knowing that it was the twenty-first, like it was a significant date in her life.

"You okay?".

Andy nodded, before her head rolled and it shook slightly.

"I had plans for today. Big plans".

Sam arched an eyebrow, was it big like a wedding day?

"Right now, I'm supposed to be happy, and celebrating, and that is so not happening".

Seriously? And she neglected mentioning this before, perhaps maybe when she was attempting to get him into bed.

"I was supposed to get cut loose today". She added at seeing Sam's face turn to stone.

"Cut loose?".

"Yup, lose my rookie status, become a real cop. And we had all these plans, and it's...".

"It's?".

"Nothing".

Andy shied away, she didn't want Sam to know the rest of her big plans.

"Andy?".

"It's my birthday, and I thought I'd be home in time, but it's the story of my life. If I don't screw it up, someone else will, if I don't walk away, someone else will, if I..."

"I get it!". Sam yelled a little louder than intended. Just to get her to stop.

He had no idea that because she was here, she was missing important parts of her life that she was entitled too.

"I didn't mean...".

"It doesn't matter".

Again, Andy fled to be replaced with the one that was cold and distant.

Sam really felt like crap.

It was her birthday and she had spent most of the day alone in here, without even being wished happy birthday.

"I um, I'm sorry".

Yup, that was really smooth.

"I've gotta go out for a while, couple hours, so lock the door?".

It was a question, like he was asking her to stay safe while he was gone.

"Where?".

She hadn't asked him that before, she had always just accepted his departure, because in the past he had always told her he was going out.

"We've got to... Get cars".

Shit, that just slipped out.

"As in how?".

But Sam knew that it was a rhetorical question, she was a smart girl, she'd figure it out.

"No". Again with that word.

"Andy, we have too".

"But why do you have to go?".

"Damian goes with Bobby, Scott's taking a car, and me. Elliot will be here with you, but he won't hurt you".

She was not happy.

"Just get some sleep okay".

"But it's dangerous". Andy's voice was squeaking.

"We'll be okay, just...get some sleep".

"Here" Sam tossed they keys at her, but she left them to fall on top of the blankets next to her.

"Just lock the door when you go to sleep, you'll be okay". He didn't want to tell her that there was a chance that Scott could be home before him, that would just instill fear in her again. Something he hadn't seen in her eyes for a while- fear.

Andy pinched her eyes closed, as she bit back words that were threatening to break free.

She wanted to ask him if he would be okay, if he would be coming back and she wanted to tell him to be careful.

But when she opened her eyes, Sam was gone.

*****Thanks for reading! Seems like times running out. **

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	14. Goodbyes

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**Chapter 14- Goodbyes. **

Andy found the house quiet, when she cracked the door open a tad; the only noise coming from the TV on in the lounge upstairs.

She ventured upstairs, cautiously in search of coffee. It had been a while since she had; had any, and she knew that Sam or Bobby wouldn't suddenly materialize with some.

It had been a while since Sam had said that they were leaving, so the house was probably empty by now.

The one named Elliot smiled when he observed her, and nodded her way. He was sitting on the couch engrossed in whatever he was watching, but as soon as she appeared hesitantly, his attention focused on her.

She relaxed and felt safer when she saw which one he was.

He reminded her of a walking teddy bear. He was huge, but had soft features and a genuinely warm smile.

"Hi" she managed weakly as she passed him, her hand lifting up in a subtle wave.

When she put a cup down for coffee, she found him closer, his hand held out.

"Bobby asked me to..."

Andy noticed that he held out keys in the palm of his hand.

"It's for the silver pickup, it's parked in the barn".

Andy looked between him and his hand, the keys glistening in the light.

Bobby was letting her go, giving her an out by letting him slip her car keys when Sam wasn't around.

Andy tugged her lip between her teeth and weighed up her options.

Elliot kept his hand out and steady, letting her decide for herself.

Like totally no pressure.

The longer she stood there thinking, the longer he held out his hand.

It took a while, but her head shook from side to side, his face softening at her answer.

She wasn't going anywhere right now, even if she was throwing away a possible last chance at freedom.

Andy was tucked up in bed when Sam came home, but this time she didn't wake up when he came into the room. For the first time ever, she stayed asleep.

He slipped around the bed, and left something on the bedside table before doing what he did best- leaving.

They had a little over twenty four hours before they would be packing it up, and leaving for the exchange.

And he planned on spending that time away from her, detached.

Andy's hand stretched out in search of Sam, once again clutching at cold sheets where she expected him to be.

She bolted upright to see his side of the bed still made up, sudden fear running through her.

He hadn't come back.

She had spent most of the night upstairs with Elliot, watching TV. Sleep wouldn't come easily, so she skipped it. She was worried that things would go badly for Sam and Bobby and that they wouldn't be making it home.

She still worried about Bobby, even though she had been a little cold- Andy still found a good side in her.

When Elliot went to bed, Andy stayed up a little longer in the lounge before finally retreating back downstairs when the wall clock said four-fifteen am.

She needed to sleep sometime.

But still it wouldn't come, tucked up in bed she couldn't help but run over her decision to stay when she was given permission to leave.

But she didn't want to leave. She had wanted to know that Sam was okay, so she stayed.

She needed to know that he was okay, so she gave up her freedom. They were planning on leaving soon anyway, so what difference would it make if she stayed a little longer.

Scrambling to get out of bed, Andy stopped as her attention focused on something next to the bed.

Her lips curved up into a smile, a really big one.

Sam had left her a miniature snow globe.

Andy snatched it up, and shook it gently, tilting it upside down and then straightening it out, the snow floating down to the ground as she held the tiny feature in her hand.

In the centre was a tiny house and evergreen trees, a surreal image of where they really were, from what she remembered seeing when she made a run for it.

It was a kind gesture, but a really sad one too.

Setting it down, Andy slipped out of bed and headed for the bathroom.

Sam pushed his food around on his plate, he'd taken Andy some food but she was in the shower so he left it next to the bed.

He'd been quiet all morning, and dodged Bobby.

He spent the night, or rather early morning, on the couch, not really sleeping, but rather letting his mind wonder freely over things it shouldn't.

It always ended up back where it started, with one person on his mind.

He was meant to start packing what he wanted to drag with him, but couldn't face going into his room and watching Andy watch him pack up his life here.

She was the only thing that he wanted to take with him, but that was impossible.

When the others left the table, Bobby hovered, her face filled with remorse.

"You still haven't changed your mind?" She eventually just dove right in and asked.

"Nope" his reply was dry but also lacking conviction.

"But you want too?".

"No I don't. She doesn't belong in this world, she isn't cut out for this". Sam said between gritted teeth. "Tomorrow when we leave, she's staying..."

Sam noticed Bobby's eyes gloat over his shoulder, his head hanging instantly.

Andy just had to slink upstairs at the wrong time, in time to hear him say that.

She wasn't supposed to know until the last minute, the second he said goodbye.

When he turned around she was gone, a sudden hand meeting the back of his head as Bobby slapped it.

"Go after her Sam, she didn't need to find out like that".

"Not gonna happen". Sam said as he found his feet carrying him towards the door that led outside to snow blanketed ground, his hand reaching for his jacket hanging on the coat rack next to the door as he passed it on the way out.

He found Damian in the barn, loading supplies and barrels of gas into two of the three vehicles they would swap out with.

They had a long drive ahead of them, so they opted to take extra gas with them instead of having to stop carrying the shipment.

Three million in cocaine, wasn't worth the risk of pulling into a gas station.

Sam spent ten minutes helping Damian before he relented and gave in- he had to check on Andy.

She had probably figured out that since they went to jack cars and what he had said to Bobby, they'd be leaving soon.

He had said tomorrow anyway, so she knew.

Sam found her pacing the space between the bed and the door, her steps forceful and annoyed.

He noticed the half empty bottle of whiskey in her hand, he'd forgotten that he'd given her one.

And she obviously found the time appropriate to drink it now.

"You". She stammered out as she stopped pacing and faced him.

What he wasn't counting on was the flying bottle of whiskey that she suddenly threw at him.

He managed to duck in time, but it barely missed his head as it hit the door and shattered behind him.

"Andy...".

"Don't okay Sam, I get it. I get that this is what you're about".

Sam pinched the bridge of his nose. This was going to be way tougher than he thought.

"You don't have a clue Andy".

"I don't? Sam, the only thing I get right now is that come sunrise, you're leaving me here".

Andy was yelling, and her voice cracking. She was really upset, but she was mad too. He didn't even know that she was capable of yelling that loud, her tone making him cringe.

"It's not as easy as you make it sound".

"Let's make it easier". Andy yelled and spun around moving to the closet.

She threw open the doors, her hands grabbing blindly at items of clothes.

"Here take this one, you look good in blue, this one you like, you wear it every week. This one is warm...". Andy was throwing his shirts at him, and he just left them to fly into him before they fluttered to the floor in a mass of tangled material.

He couldn't see her face, but he didn't need too, to know that she was crying.

Why the hell was she crying?

Bobby's voice suddenly sounded silently in his head, her words making him literally feel like he could tear the world apart and not care.

It made sense, how she came to that conclusion, seeing Andy react like she was. Her unpredictable side making itself known as she just lost it.

Lost the sweet, calm and collected Andy as she became the passionate but pissed off version of herself.

"Andy stop".

"Here, you'll need a jacket".

"Andy!".

Him yelling her name made her falter, before she let out a soft sob and raced into the bathroom.

Sam tried the handle, but it was locked.

"Andy... Please open the door".

Sam really hated himself right now, for putting her through this. For keeping her when he could have figured out a way to get Damian to let her go.

She could have been cut loose, celebrated her birthday or just have gone into witness protection if she let herself get carded. She didn't need to suffer.

He was selfish, and he knew it.

"Go away Sam". Her voice sounded so empty, so cold- as it sounded through the door.

"No, not until...". Until what?

He really wasn't making this any better.

"Andy!".

Maybe she was just scared; scared of being left alone in the middle of nowhere. Scared that she wouldn't make it home. Scared that they wouldn't find her when she called them to come and get her.

She had dealt with a lot of fear since she had been here, and it wasn't quite over yet, so the fear dwelled.

"Go away".

So Sam let his hand rest on the door when he stopped banging on it.

She really wanted him to leave, so ... He left.

******Thanks for reading!**

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**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	15. Real Life

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**Chapter 15- Real Life. **

By the time the sun was up, Sam had already loaded his bag into the car he would be driving away when they came back to swap car's.

He grabbed items idly when Andy locked herself in the bathroom, and threw them into a bag- so that he wouldn't have to come back and have her see him do it.

He had stayed away from Andy for the rest of the day, and night; he asked Bobby to take her food and then he avoided Bobby after that too.

He spent the night on the couch again, willing his mind to shut off and stop thinking about her, but no matter how hard he tried, it wouldn't listen.

When everyone else was up, he nodded towards the stairs as Bobby passed him and called out a loud "Wrap it up", their signal that time was up.

He didn't want to leave without saying goodbye to Andy.

He found her huddled under the covers, pretending to sleep.

He sat down on the end of the bed, knowing that she was awake even though she didn't stir.

Three seconds of sitting, and he was standing again.

He took his phone out of his pocket and set it down next to the bed.

"Don't call until after two pm. I know that there is no reason for you to trust me, but please, trust me on this".

He took a few steps away before stopping, and turning around to face her.

"See you round McNally".

Andy had spent the night convincing herself that she was okay with this, okay with how things had to happen.

But she was lying to herself.

She spent hours going over tiny details, searching for clarity, but every single thought followed down one single path.

One that she wasn't prepared for.

She had no idea how it happened, or when it happened, she just knew that it was suddenly there.

This inexplicable feeling.

Andy stayed in bed, assuming that they'd already left. There was no point in getting up.

She lay looking at the snow globe, her life already feeling empty.

When she couldn't stand it anymore, she threw back the covers and finally got up.

She went upstairs and made coffee, but it tasted bland.

She went back downstairs and had a shower, slipping into some comfortable warm clothes.

She found Sam's phone next to the bed and would occasionally glance at it to check the time.

Two pm loomed closer and closer, and even though she didn't know why; she was following Sam's request to wait until after two to phone someone to come and get her.

Her mind warped over the choices she had to call; she couldn't decide who she should call.

Traci, Dov, Chris? She wasn't that close to Ice-Queen Peck, but she was on the list too. Her dad was definitely not, he would probably freak out if she called him now and she wasn't prepared to find him answering the phone drunk if he stumbled off the sobriety bandwagon when she disappeared.

Andy stretched out, strange noises pulling her attention.

She must have dosed off considering that she had virtually no sleep the night before.

She hadn't ever heard sounds down here before, except for sounds in the room, so the loud banging jostled her.

Sitting up, Andy shook the groggy throws of sleep away as she heard more noises, louder than the first.

She slid off the bed as the noise died down, a nagging feeling lingering in her that the sounds were familiar.

They sounded like gunshots.

Creaking the door open just a fraction, Andy heard another shot ring out, fear cursing through her as an eerie silence followed.

Sneaking up the staircase, Andy heard footsteps, lots of them as they cross the wooden floors.

She heard the familiar sounds of police radio's going off as voices crossed the airwaves back and forth.

There were cops in the house.

She stepped up the stairs slowly, the room filled with activity, her eyes flowing over all the bodies that walked around; oblivious to her sudden presence.

Andy saw a slip of yellow sticking out from behind the couch, the corner of a yellow tarp indicating a body under it.

Without even realizing it, Andy was moving forwards, her legs scrambling to carry her across the room as the world faded into slow motion.

Voices were calling her and attention paid to her as she fought off a pair of hands that tried to suddenly restrain her.

But she couldn't make out words above the rolling drums in her ears, everything drowned out by her racing heartbeat as it thundered in her own ears.

She heard one sound clearly, the sound of Sam's name coming out of her own mouth repeatedly as she screamed it.

The first thought that ran through her mind was Sam.

Her mind conjured up images of Sam laying under the tarp, lifeless, empty eyes staring up at her.

Andy was vaguely aware of Bobby's voice screaming, and hands trying to subdue her as she was suddenly slammed into the floor, a tackle from behind making her hit the floor hard.

She wiggled and struggled to slip free, her hands pawing at the ones that held her down.

She was cuffed forcefully and lifted to her feet, kicking and screaming, but never giving up; even when she knew that she wasn't getting let loose soon.

Movement to her left caught her eye, Andy turning to find Sam on his knees, his hands behind his back cuffed.

His head was hanging, so his face was obscured from view, but the relief she felt at seeing him there was overwhelming.

He never looked up, not even when she had been screaming his name; he just sat there like he was ashamed.

Bobby smiled at her as she was led past her and out to a waiting cruiser.

The entire front lawn was covered in flashing lights, a wave of blue uniforms and yellow tape lighting up the snow covered ground.

Bundled into the back of the cruiser, Andy let one single lone tear escape, even though she was going home, she was sad.

They had her in holding, with four other woman. They all looked like hookers, and Andy had to fight the urge to giggle at their less than tasteful outfits.

Bobby was brought in sometime later, and put in with them, but she looked strangely torn between happy and heartbroken.

She didn't say anything to Andy, just went and sat down on the floor in the corner of the room, away from everybody else.

Andy did the same, sank down in the opposite corner, she was suddenly really tired. Drained.

She had been there for a while, when she heard her name being called, by a familiar voice.

She found her feet, and turned to find a weepy Traci in front of the holding cell, Jerry and Luke with her.

A heavy metal key unlocked the cell and the door swung open, Andy rushing into Traci's embrace as soon as the door was out of the way.

The floodgates opened, and Andy let the tears out, a wave of emotion sweeping over her.

Jerry signed her out, Traci leading her towards the door with a promise of home, one arm draped around Andy's shoulder as Traci tried to comfort her.

They passed the men's holding cell down the hall, the layout of this division similar to that of Fifteen.

Andy caught sight of Sam, but his head dropped the second their eyes met.

Traci tugged her hand and pulled her away, one last look in Sam's direction over her shoulder before they rounded the corner and he was out of sight.

No matter how she felt, it didn't change anything.

It was finally over and she was home.

Traci spent hours with her when they got to her condo.

She refused to leave Andy alone, and tried her best to get Andy to tell her what happened.

But she didn't say a word, she just kept re-running everything over and over in her mind in silence.

Her dad stopped by, but didn't stay long. He had a meeting, and had been battling to stay sober after she was taken.

Taken.

She wasn't taken, she went with them willingly.

"Andy, talk to me".

Traci's voice sounded so broken saying that; that it finally dawned on Andy that she hadn't spoken since being at home.

"I'm okay, I promise".

"You sure? You look so far away".

"Just thinking".

"About?".

"Everything".

Traci had made them hot chocolate, with mini marshmallows in it, so they sat sprawled out on the couch, Traci trying to get Andy to talk.

"You look good".

"They looked after me".

Traci smiled at her sadly; "But?"

"I screwed up".

"How did you screw up?".

That didn't make sense.

"I..."

"You?"

Thinking it, and feeling it were so different to saying it. When her mouth fluttered open to answer Traci's question, her voice had disappeared. No words wanted to come out.

Saying it, would make it real, saying it would mean that it was really there. Admitting it, that was a whole new ballgame. Admitting it to herself had been hard, but admitting it to someone else- that was just torture.

"I..."

"Andy!".

It was killing Traci to see Andy so lost, so hesitant and unsure.

"I think I fell in love".

******Thanks for reading! Any speculation on how things will turn out now that they're out the house is welcome in reviews!**

*******okay, so let me know what you think in another one of those awesome thoughts you leave by using the little box underneath here - .****͡▹**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	16. Still See You Everywhere

**Hi again, thanks for all the awesome reviews & alerts! You guys are amazing!**

**Thanks to kelly2727 & the regulars. Welcome to the newbies. **

**Chapter 16- Still See You Everywhere. **

"Whoa! What? With who, how is that even possible when... Oh sweetie".

Yup, she knew that was coming. Andy had know Traci long enough to know how she would react.

"I swear it wasn't intentional".

"Andy, don't make this harder on yourself. You were under duress".

"No, you don't get it, it just sort of happened, and I thought maybe it was there like three days ago... And then when the cops showed up there was gunfire, and I saw a tarp, and I swear my heart stopped. But then he was there and he was okay and..."

Wow, that was a lot to take in.

"Andy, everything will look better in the morning, you just need to sleep".

"Traci, you don't get it. This isn't going to go away".

And it wasn't going to get any better.

Andy had always had a thing for the bad-boy type, but never this badly.

This time it was different. It felt like the real thing.

And there was no way out of it.

Sergeant Best, Officer Williams and Officer Shaw stopped by her condo the next morning, all wearing smiles as they welcomed her back to her life.

Luke stopped by too, with a huge bouquet of flowers that stank like stale detergent. She threw them out as soon as he left.

Andy had been requested by Luke down at the barn at lunch time to give her statement, something she wasn't looking forward too.

Reliving it all over again.

She dressed warmly, before venturing outside in the cold.

She had; had a harrowing night.

She struggled to finally find sleep and then it was plagued with nightmares of Sam being shot.

She had given up eventually and watched TV until the sun attempted to peek out behind the clouds.

The air was filled with overgrown snow flakes, but at least the weather hadn't gotten colder.

She actually really, really loved this weather, even though it made her nose glow red when it was cold.

Andy trudged through the snow, on her way to the barn in preparation of what lay ahead.

She knew that she was going to be in for hours of grueling drilling, and questioning.

Some things she would avoid mentioning unless absolutely necessary.

When she got to the barn, she reveled in the warmth inside as the familiar smells and sounds overwhelmed her.

She had really missed this.

She met Chris, Dov and Gail in the hallway, warm hugs shared as they welcomed her home.

They hadn't changed much in the nearly eight weeks that she had been gone.

Next was Traci as she ambushed her outside the locker room when Andy went to see what was still inside her locker.

She came out the locker room, and moved down the hallway, almost reaching the end when she heard her TO call out "Sammy, Brother".

For some reason she found her feet planted to the floor before she reached the corner.

"Ollie".

That voice... It made her feel like she was about to explode.

"Glad you're back".

"Glad to be back".

What? Back in cuffs? Who would be happy about that?

She wasn't intending on listening to the conversation, but she couldn't help herself.

"Hear you held my Rookie captive?".

"Your Rookie?".

"Yup McNa..."

Sam cleared his throat then, all conversation effectively cut off.

"Uh-oh". Officer Shaw said before Andy retreated back to the locker room.

What was going on?

Andy tried to make sense of what she had just heard, Sam knew her TO and he was 'Back', whatever that meant.

Was he a regular at Fifteen, cuffs slapped on so many times that they knew him by name? And he them?

Traci found her later, sitting on the bench in the locker room. Luke knew she was here but couldn't find her.

She avoided answering Traci's repeated question of _'Are you okay?'_ By just saying yes everytime she asked.

Andy was led to a interrogation room, Traci giving her a hug at the door as she wished her good luck.

Luke was waiting, video camera and recorder ready.

When Andy sat down, Luke nodded and switched the video camera on; "State your name and line of work for the record".

"Andy, Andrea McNally, Rookie at Fifteen division, Toronto Police Department".

After three hours of grueling questioning Luke told her to take a break.

She knew how much time had ticked by because since she had been back because she had her watch back on. She was so lost without knowing the time.

She left the interrogation room and headed for the coffee stand, an urge to warm her insides up enough to allow herself to drink what they called 'coffee'.

She slipped out the door, the unexpected sight at the other end of the barn stopping her.

The visuals causing her to totally freeze up.

She thought that she had heard his voice, but chalked it down to wishful thinking. What were the chances of that right?

But now, there stood Sam, his back facing her as he spoke to Bobby.

Okay, that was really weird.

Maybe Bobby flipped on Damian to get herself a get out of jail free card?

Andy watched as Sam spoke to Bobby, her head shaking lightly, as tears marred her face.

Sam was wiping them away before he wrapped his arm's around her and held her really close.

_What!_

Okay, so that explained Bobby's not so subtle words of warning.

No wonder she had such a close bond with Sam... _They had a thing going on. _

Andy watched the personal exchange with her brows furrowed and her face creased.

The moment was so personal, and so private that she just didn't get why they didn't take it out of full view of everybody in the vicinity.

Clearly they had both been released, so they were free to go- what was stopping them?

Andy saw Bobby whisper, and Sam whisper back.

Yup, totally a moment on a seriously private scale.

"Andy!".

Luke's voice sounded in her ear, rather loudly; telling her that it wasn't the first time that he had called her.

"Huh?".

"Ready?".

"I'm sorry what?". She had completely lost all coherent thought.

"Back to interrogation? You okay?".

"Oh yeah, sure. I'm totally fine". Andy said as she fell into step beside Luke.

"It isn't supposed to be this hard". Her voice was riddled with sadness, Sam's heart breaking for her.

Sam felt for her, he really did. He knew exactly how she felt, how it felt to have one thing in one breath and it was gone the next.

Not that he really ever had Andy, not technically.

"Is it supposed to hurt this much?". She was sobbing, her tears falling unbidden into his shirt as they stood in a corner of Fifteen division.

She really loved Damian, even though he was heartless. But she balanced him out.

"I dunno". Sam said, holding her a little tighter. Her tears were dripping onto his shirt, but he didn't care, she needed comfort more than he needed his shirt to stay dry.

"You feel the same huh?". She suddenly mumbled, earning a nod from Sam.

"I just don't get why you let her go?".

"'Coz it was the right thing to do?". Yup, he was audibly questioning himself on that theory.

"Sam, yeah it was, but you still fell and you fell hard and fast. So did she, I saw what you saw when she thought you were under the tarp".

That was something that would stay burned on the back of his eyelids.

"You have a chance now, to fix it".

"Nope, not gonna happen".

"Sam!". She finally pulled away.

"Just stop okay. I don't know why you let her go, when you want her that badly..."

She was hissing now, staring him in the eye as she stood on her tiptoes to look him in the eye.

"Because it was based on a lie, that's all there was to it".

"Arg, you are so dense! Seriously". She stepped back down, before looking past Sam, his face setting to stone as he read hers.

He knew who she just saw.

"Who the hell is he?".

Sam turned around in time to see Detective Callaghan open a door for Andy, his hand lightly placing itself on her lower back as he guided her into an interrogation room.

Right now, he was really happy that things turned out the way they had.

Without complications.

Sam's attention focused away from Andy, and back on Bobby as she let her mind drift away and stare vacantly at the now empty hallway.

"It's life in prison Sam". With those words he knew that reality was setting in, and that it was all about to come crashing down.

"I know, but it's what he chose". In some ways Damian was a good guy, in other ways- he was the devil reincarnate.

"How am I supposed to do this now...without him?". Her voice was cracking, a breakdown bubbling closer to the surface.

"I have no idea, but you'll figure it out. And you've still got me".

His final words drew a tug at her lips, a soft "Yeah, I've still got you" mumbled as she nodded towards the door.

She was ready to leave now, to go home, so Sam nodded and held the door open for her when they reached it.

Home.

That sounded really good right now.

******Thanks for reading!**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	17. Out Of Reach

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**Chapter 17- Out Of Reach. **

Andy took Luke up on his offer for a ride home when they were done with her debriefing.

They had spent hours going over everything; every tiny, dismal aspect of her absence scrutinized.

But no matter what Luke asked her, she answered truthfully. Even if the questions were hard, and made her feel like she was being viewed as a suspect, she kept her answers as close to the truth as possible without even feeling the need to lie.

She just left out the parts about Sam. Talked her way around them when she needed too.

When they were done, she couldn't find Traci, Chris or Dov and it was late and probably cold outside.

Night had fallen, and she was tired, she wasn't in the mood to walk or catch a cab, so Luke's offer would have to do.

Andy thanked him the second he stopped the car and got out at warp speed.

He still looked at her like he wanted more, but that was so not happening, so she smiled, and closed the door before walking away.

Andy made it upstairs and unlocked her front door, happy to be home.

She switched lights on as soon as she was in the door, shrugged off her jacket and scarf and hung them up on the coat rack next to the door.

She headed straight for the kitchen; needing decent coffee and food. Her hand hit the light switch, then it just simply hovered on the wall when the room illuminated itself as the lights flickered on.

There on the kitchen counter top shimmering in the light was her snow globe. Standing alone, silently in the middle of the counter.

The snow globe that Sam had given her for her birthday, the one that she had left behind, along with everything else that was there.

She instinctively knew that Sam had left it here, he was the only one that knew about it.

That meant he broke into her condo and invaded her personal space in order to do that. But even as the thought reined through her mind; she didn't feel threatened. Or in danger.

The more she stared at the snow globe, the more the tiny house and trees inside it stared back. It made her feel... It. The indescribable feeling she had been feeling for a while. The It she stupidly voiced out aloud to Traci, the cursed L word.

Andy was on a leave of absence until the shrink cleared her for duty. It was standard procedure, but more forcible under the circumstances that surrounded her.

Sergeant Best had however assured her that her career was not in jeopardy because of the fact, so she felt more comfortable being home.

She spent the first three days mostly sleeping, not that she was tired. After that, she spent time catching up with her dad and had dinners with Traci and Leo. It made her feel like she had never been gone.

But the time she spent alone still gave her the chance to settle her

Mind on wondering what Sam was doing now, and where Bobby was.

If they were wherever together.

And no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't shut the thoughts out. They kept creeping up on her.

She cleaned out her condo and did grocery shopping, anything to keep her mind occupied.

Today was her first appointment with the shrink, a week after coming back.

Andy left her appointment frustrated, and highly irritated.

Her shrink had asked her if she knew what _'Stockholm Syndrome'_ was, and Andy really didn't appreciate it.

They had grazed over all the subjects of her days spent away, but somehow Andy said something about Sam, and the good doctor harped on it.

She had relentlessly pried on that information, and didn't let it go until Andy's time was up.

Now Andy suddenly felt really lost. And confused.

She walked home, lost in thought, her boots crunching over the snow with each step she took.

When Andy got home, she googled _'Stockholm Syndrome' _because suddenly the more she thought about it, the more she hoped it was what was causing her to feel so many things at the same time.

Things that shouldn't be there, things that she didn't want to be there, didn't want to feel.

The results she found made for interesting reading;

_'Stockholm syndrome, or capture__–__bonding, is a psychological phenomenon in which hostages express empathy and sympathy and have positive feelings toward their captors, sometimes to the point of defending them. These feelings are generally considered irrational in light of the danger or risk endured by the victims, who essentially mistake a lack of abuse from their captors for an act of kindness. The FBI's Hostage Barricade Database System shows that roughly 27% of victims show evidence of Stockholm syndrome._

_Stockholm syndrome can be seen as a form of traumatic bonding, which does not necessarily require a hostage scenario, but which describes __"__strong emotional ties that develop between two persons where one person intermittently harasses, beats, threatens, abuses, or intimidates the other.__"__ One commonly used hypothesis to explain the effect of Stockholm syndrome is based on Freudian theory. It suggests that the bonding is the individual__'__s response to trauma in becoming a victim. Identifying with the aggressor is one way that the ego defends itself. When a victim believes the same values as the aggressor, they no longer become a threat'. _

Huh, pardon me?

But it didn't divulge deeply into anything that would help her.

And she wasn't totally convinced.

She didn't have the same beliefs that Sam did, she knew right from wrong and knew that their opinions differed. She didn't feel sympathy or empathy towards him at all. She didn't even feel sorry for him.

And what she read said nothing about what she was supposed to feel now that she wasn't held captive anymore. They were separated, and there were still all these feelings. What happened to the 'After you think you have Stockholm Syndrome' articles she desperately wanted to find?

Then there was the fact that he was at Fifteen when she had been there.

She still hadn't quite figured out why he was at the barn and known by name.

Remembering his embrace with Bobby, Andy felt sick. She had been played and used as a pawn, losing her self respect and her heart along the way.

"Will you stop!". Sam growled out.

She just wouldn't give up.

"Sammy, admit it and I'll leave it alone".

She had her head in his lap, his favorite person the topic of discussion- again.

Bobby just wouldn't let it go.

"I'm going for a drink". She said sitting up.

"Okay, have fun". Sam said sarcastically, wearing a tight smile.

She left after that, knowing that he wouldn't follow.

It was easy to find Andy's condo.

She lived in a good neighborhood.

Bobby had begged Oliver for the address, and he finally gave it to her when she told him why she wanted it.

Andy opened the door and choked when she saw who was standing there, Bobby expecting nothing less than the reception she got.

"What do you want?". Wow her voice could radiate coldness when she wanted it too.

"To talk, explain things?".

"I think you've done enough".

Feisty Andy was out to play.

"Look, Andy I'm sorry. It wasn't meant too...".

"To what? Destroy my life? Keep me back from getting cut loose? Break my heart? Scare me or make me wonder if I was going to get a bullet to the head at any time?". Her anger dripped from her voice, that was really how she felt- then and now.

Andy wasn't budging, Bobby wasn't getting in, she still had her arm across the doorway.

"None of it, and Sam..."

"I don't care okay, so just...go away".

The door slamming in Bobby's face ended that conversation.

Andy had three more appointments with the shrink before she was cleared for duty.

She became a good liar, telling the shrink what she wanted to hear about the whole Sam issue. She had made the rational decision to say what was expected of her, admit that she made a mistake.

She had said that she didn't feel the same way anymore, and that was the end of that.

But it was still a lie.

Even though she had tried to convince herself that it was the truth, she even went so far as to say it in her head everyday. Now she just needed to start believing it.

She was back in uniform three days later, Sergeant Best welcoming her back warmly.

He handed out pairings and asked her to stand up, before he walked over to her and held out a pair of scissors.

He was cutting her loose. Or letting her cut herself loose.

Andy reached out and took the scissors with a sense of pride, and a giant smile, she snipped off the end of her tie, and looked up to find Sam at the back of the room smiling at her.

Arg, he just seemed to be everywhere.

But wait, why was he attending parade?

Andy handed the scissors back and held up her snipped tie, before looking at the back of the room again, but Sam was gone.

"Who is that?". She asked Traci as they walked out the Parade room and towards the locker room, Andy needed to get a new tie before going out on patrol.

She had been missing from the barn for a while, so asking someone that had been here would be the best way to find out exactly what and who he was.

Without raising suspicion.

"He's hot right! That's Sam Swarek, he's a D from Guns and Gangs. Took a transfer back here after getting out a really long UC. Apparently it was a really bad one".

_Seriously? Sam was a COP?. _

The thought made Andy shudder.

And it made her feel like the world had some sick plan at making her life miserable, like she was meant to suffer indefinitely.

Well at least his name was Sam.

Swarek, it kind of suited him.

"Andy, you okay?".

"Yeah, totally fine". Andy said as she opened the door to the locker room when they finally reached it.

"What aren't you telling me?".

She should have guessed that if anyone saw through the lie, it would be Traci.

They were best friends, inseparable since the academy. And Traci knew her better than she knew herself most days.

"Nothing Trace. It's not important".

"Oh wait... _It's him isn't it?"._

How she pieced that together Andy would never know.

"Wow". Traci said sitting down on the bench in the locker room.

"Yup". Andy said opening her locker door and scratching around in it aimlessly.

"I'll wait in the cruiser". Traci suddenly said, Andy about to ask her why when she turned around and leaned out behind the locker door to find Sam standing in the locker room watching her.

"So you finally got cut loose". He was trying to smile, but his heart really wasn't in it.

"Yup". Andy turned back to her locker, her unclipped cut tie thrown in as she still dug around for a new one.

"Andy..."

"Don't okay, you don't need too..."

Yeah, that wasn't sounding as convincing as it should have.

But he didn't need to anything. Say anything, do anything.

Absolutely nothing.

"I just want to say sorry".

Sam was closer, but blocked out of view by her locker door that was still open.

"Me too". Andy said slamming the door closed with her new tie in her hand and brushing passed Sam, this time walking away and leaving him standing there.

"Andy".

Andy stopped long enough to turn around just before reaching the door.

"I really am sorry, for what it's worth".

"It's not worth anything Sam". She said before reaching for the door handle and pulling it open.

Sam watched her go, her reaction close enough to how he had predicted it would go.

He had wanted to explain, wanted to apologize, it was about so much more than she knew. But there was no way that she was going to let him close enough to do any of it.

"You okay?". Traci asked when Andy slid into the passenger seat of the cruiser, her tie still clutched in her hand.

"No". She wouldn't even bother trying to lie this time.

"So what did he say?".

"That he was sorry".

"And?"

Andy rolled her eyes at Traci's need to know everything. But it was because that's how she learned, how she absorbed things.

"I said it wasn't worth anything?". That wasn't supposed to come out like a question.

"Andy, this is the same guy right? The one from the undercover?".

Andy nodded.

"This is the same guy you told me that you think you fell for?".

Andy nodded again.

"That is the only time that I have ever seen you remotely close to feeling anything emotional towards a guy. We've been friend for a while, and this doesn't look like you just want to jump him. It looks like a little... More?".

No-one should ever doubt Traci's intelligence.

"I know. But it's just like there was this thing while we were there, but we're not there anymore, we're here. In real life".

"Are you telling me that it wasn't real enough for you? That you don't really feel like you're a mess? Because if you are, I'd like to help out by saying- Are you insane?".

Andy let out a loud groan, she really didn't feel like doing this when she had almost started believing in the whole Stockholm thing.

This really wasn't good.

Sam let out a silent curse when the door closed behind her. He had the irresistible urge to cuff her to something and make her listen, but he knew that it wouldn't work.

It was how they ended up in this mess in the first place.

He thought that her looking at him certain ways when he was Sam the Criminal had been hard to digest, but when she looked at him now and said that his apology wasn't worth anything, Sam felt sick at seeing the revulsion and disgust on her face.

But the worst was the betrayal that he saw flash through her eyes as she looked at him. Like he had scarred some sacred part of them.

*******Thanks for reading!**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	18. Feeling Something

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**Welcome to the newbies!**

**Chapter 18- Feeling Something. **

Drinks at the Penny after shift was like her own private heaven.

She had missed this, and was catching up with everyone celebrating her belated birthday and belated getting cut loose.

Gail was feeding her tequila and Dov kept the beers coming. She kept drinking until she stopped caring that she was drinking.

Sam showed up too, sat in a corner with Oliver and ignored her. Much to her delight.

She did not want a repeat of earlier in the locker room, it had been harrowing.

"Man Swarek is awesome" Dov belted out, Andy feeling the urge to slap him against the head.

But it was innocent, he didn't know that they had... History?

Andy turned her ears off after that, and listened to the music playing softly in the background instead, while Dov recounted something that happened during the day.

That had to do with Sam.

Bobby showed up too sometime between Andy's third and fourth beer. Andy felt a heated stare and looked up to find Bobby glaring back at her. After that she kept stealing glances in Andy's direction.

It eventually got so bad, that Gail made a comment about showing the _'Awesome Guy's girl'_ how awesome it would be if she didn't stop staring at Andy.

Andy was sure she heard Gail grumble a _'What is her problem'_ before Traci told her to leave it alone. Traci's heady warning was thankfully enough to make Gail drop it verbally, although she would keep giving cold glances back at Bobby.

Another shot of tequila and Andy was out the door.

She stole the chance to slip out when Traci headed to the ladies room, she felt bad for ditching her, but she needed some time alone.

Everything from today just became too much for her to handle, and no-one was making it any easier. She wasn't even making it easy on herself.

"Andy".

Great!

Sam had this inconceivable way of just showing up.

Andy stopped and spun around, an eye roll not filtered as it flashed.

"What?". She sounded whiny.

"Need a ride home?".

"No".

Andy turned back around and took a few more steps before she noticed Sam walking next to her.

Great now he was going to walk her home.

And he did, all the way to her front door; which she slammed closed in his face.

Sam kept his distance while they walked, but stole glances at her at any opportunity that presented itself.

She looked so worn down, so defeated that she almost looked like she had given up on the day.

Or it had given up on her.

She looked tired too, a light black shading clinging to the delicate skin under her eyes. She hadn't even looked that bad when she was cuffed to his bed.

Then she was healthy and glowing, and fierce. Now she looked shallow and depleted.

When her door closed loudly in his face, he had his mouth open to say something, anything he just didn't know what.

She was cold, and distant and he really couldn't blame her for it.

He wanted so desperately to reach out and just touch her, feel the jolted spark that he hoped would still be there when he touched her skin.

But he knew he couldn't. Simply because he couldn't do that to her when he had already done so much damage.

The next morning her head was on fire and her mouth dry, she was so going to hate herself on patrol.

The first signs of her hangover starting before she was even properly awake.

Sam hadn't gotten much sleep since they came back.

Even going back to work didn't help. She was always in his head.

He didn't know that she was at Fifteen, he requested the transfer the second he came out of debriefing.

He had been with Guns and Gangs for five years, he didn't need to be in a normal division, riding a desk. He just wanted too.

He wanted normal and placid, and that was his first decision to obtain it- go back to where it started.

Thinking about it now, he couldn't believe that he had even managed to miss that vital information the day he first met Andy.

How ironic was that? Her squad car had been marked with a big 15- whatever, and he had missed it?

Maybe because he was watching her even before she offered to trade places with the kid.

Now that she was back, he was beyond lost. Having her there, but so far away, was really hard.

It was taking huge restraint on his part not to... To what? Make life more miserable for himself?

Last night at the Penny he thought about approaching her again, but with the way she was slamming the shots back, he steered clear.

On the last round of shots, he could have sworn that she held up the shot glass and said _'To Stockholm Syndrome'_ as she clinked the tiny glass against that of Jerry's girlfriend.

That stung.

Really badly.

It wasn't something he had even thought about, until he heard her say it.

It was obviously what she thought.

But if she thought that, then she was feeling something right?

He wanted to take her home, make sure she was safe, but she wouldn't accept his offer of a ride, so he walked her home instead.

He had this incurable need to look out for her, and to be close to her, and it was incurable because no matter what he did, it didn't go away.

The next morning, he went to work, not really expecting much of a start to the day.

Until he got a look from Nash, Andy's friend and Jerry's girlfriend.

Yup, she knew who he was. And where Andy had been, and she wasn't happy about it.

Sam headed straight for his office, not caring that she knew. He didn't care if the whole world knew.

He found the snow globe on his desk, waiting for his arrival.

He had left it in Andy's kitchen, because he wanted her to have it, so when he was released from holding, he went back and got it.

That one single second, when his eyes spotted it, made everything else just fade away. It was like Andy was trying to tell him that it was the end of the chapter of her life that he existed in.

Andy arrived at the barn, feeling better. A hot shower and cold air had helped her cure the hangover slightly. She stopped by Sam's office and left him a little something before finding sanctuary in the locker room.

She slipped into her uniform, and headed for the coffee stand, her hands were frozen.

And again, he was in between her and where she needed to be, his eyes snapping up too meet hers the second she set foot around the corner.

Sam saw her come around the corner, before stopping, shaking her head and going in the opposite direction.

Andy began back peddling the instant she saw them. Bobby just kept on creeping up everywhere too.

She was holding out keys, Sam's hand reaching out for them when he saw her. Bobby had her back towards Andy, so thankfully she didn't have to look her in the eye too.

Andy didn't make it very far before Sam cut her off. She tried to retreat, but he was fast- really fast.

So in an instant, he was between her and where she was trying to go- again.

"What do you want Sam?".

"Five minutes?".

Andy blew out a loud breath.

His presence was making her head feel thicker and heavier than her hangover made it feel.

"Please, it's important".

Sam reached out and took her hand, pulling her back towards Bobby who was smiling so warmly, it made Andy feel like she wanted to wipe it off her face.

"I...". Andy tried to pull away, but Sam wasn't letting her hand go. His fingers clamped down firmly, but not hard enough to hurt her. Just hard enough to hold on to her hand.

"Andy, Bobby. My sister Sarah".

That grabbed her attention.

"What?". She shrieked out, Bobby/Sarah shrugged as she let out a light giggle at Andy's expression.

"I tried telling you, I'm sorry".

Andy felt like an idiot.

But they didn't even have the faintest traces of resemblance.

Andy looked between Sam and his SISTER before shaking her head, pulling her hand out of Sam's; and walking away.

"That didn't go well".

Sam let out a frustrated sigh.

When he saw Andy's face when she saw them coming around the corner, it made sense, the cold shoulder.

She thought they were... Something else.

He found Andy in the locker room, sitting on the bench with her head bent over staring at the floor. She was having trouble controlling her breathing.

She didn't bother looking up, she knew it was him.

"Can we talk?". He said after just standing there for a while, her gaze fixed on his feet.

"There's nothing to talk about". Andy kept her head down, she really didn't even want to look at him right now.

She wouldn't have been able to say that if she had to look at him.

"Andy, look at me and say that and I'll...".

Andy's head whipped up, her eyes cold and empty as she looked at him. Her lips were in a tight line, her face hard as she kept glaring at him, his words dying down as he saw her look up.

"I need to explain".

"Explain what?".

"Everything, Me".

"Sam, I don't...".

"Please?". His tone nearly ripped Andy's heart out.

It was locked in desperation.

"I need you to know the truth".

He looked so open and honest in that moment, like there was no mask, no fake identity. Just him.

"I can't..."

She wasn't going to do this to herself, put herself out there where serious damage could be done.

"Can't or won't?".

"Both, it doesn't matter".

She said getting to her feet.

Sam looked defeated, like he had just lost whatever was holding him together.

He left her with the decision, and she chose to walk away. Again.

Everytime he tried to cross the stormy waters, the waves would knock him over.

She wasn't going to give him an in, a chance to explain.

Sam made sure that he was back at the barn before Andy was due back from patrol.

He let his presence be know, just in case she changed her mind.

But she didn't, she smiled sadly in his direction as she pushed the door open and left after shift.

"You know, a fake smile can hide a million tears".

Sam looked to the left to find Nash standing next to him.

It was the first words he had ever heard out of her mouth.

Her hand held up a piece of paper, his fingers reaching out to take it.

She walked away as soon as Jerry came into the hallway, a smile passing between him and Nash as they left for the night.

"Tell me I did the right thing?". Sam heard her ask Jerry just before they cleared the door.

Jerry looked over his shoulder at Sam before turning back to Nash.

Sam didn't hear his reply, but the smile Jerry gave him told him all he needed to know.

Jerry thought that she had indeed done the right thing.

Sam unfolded the piece of paper to find an address and telephone number scribbled across it.

Finally, someone was giving him a break.

*******Thanks for reading!**

**So who's still here? Anyone see the Bobby/Sarah thing coming?**

**More up soon!**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	19. I kinda

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**Thanks to kelly2727, the regulars & welcome to the newbies!**

**Here's more; **

**Chapter 19- "I kinda...". **

"Do you have any idea how crazy that sounds?". Traci said as they were changing out of their uniforms after shift.

"I know, but nothing makes sense anymore". Andy mumbled, slightly under her breath.

Traci had asked her how she felt now that Sam was at Fifteen, and how she intended on coping with her feelings when she wasn't prepared to act on them.

Andy's simple reply had been- nothing.

She felt nothing, she was going to do nothing. And that there was just nothing there.

And, Traci really didn't agree with her decision.

Leaving the locker room, Andy told Traci that she wanted to walk home, to clear her head before saying goodbye just as she saw Sam leaving his office.

He was watching her, and she managed to find a small smile to flash his way before leaving the barn and stepping out into the cold air.

Sam found the address easily enough, grateful that it was a good side of town.

He knocked and waited, a groan on the other side of the door telling him that this wasn't going to be easy.

But nothing about them had been easy since they met.

Andy opened the door, but held her arm across it, blocking any entry.

"What is it? Are you stalking me?".

"Yes".

His answer seemed to shock her, her eyebrows shooting up when he answered, before they furrowed together and dipped before she spoke.

"Leave me alone".

"No, not until you here me out".

Andy stepped aside and let him in, his eyes drawn to every object in the lounge. It told him more about her, things he didn't know.

Like how she would hang on to small things that were important to her- like a photo or mismatched cushions. Objects that would be innate to others were her most prized possessions.

Even though he had been in here before, he was unobservant then. He had just been in and out.

He had refrained from letting himself take the tour because it felt too intrusive that day.

Andy noticed Sam taking in his surroundings, his eyes shifting swiftly over the room.

The only reason that she had let him in was so that he could say what he had too, and then leave. She was trying to make it as painless as possible.

"Bobby is my sister Sarah".

Sam spoke up eventually, breaking the stiff silence that engulfed the air around them.

Andy knew that already, so she looked away, that annoyed feeling tugging at her again.

"You don't look like each other". Andy stated blankly. The thought had been slamming around in her mind until it eventually flew out of her mouth.

"I... Sarah's parents adopted me when I was three. My mother died, and my dad was in jail, so I was in foster care. I just remember that one day they came ... She's still my sister".

Sam's words tugged at Andy's heartstrings. He'd had a really tough start to life. A sad start.

Sam swayed back and forth on his feet a little, his eyes never drifting away from her even though he looked really uncomfortable right now.

Andy had her arm's crossed and was leaning against the back of the couch, everything screaming that they weren't about to get comfortable.

"Sarah was working a dive bar, scouting for small time dealers, and Damian took her. A fight broke out and he grabbed her and hauled her out the door as insurance. They were talking about a big job, so she wormed her way in and stayed even when he gave her the chance to go".

Wow, Andy didn't know that. So Sarah was a cop too. A UC, just like Sam.

Like Brother, like Sister.

Sam ignored Andy's pained look, he had too if he wanted to keep talking. She was hurt because it wasn't just him that misled her- it was Sarah too.

"She went off the wire, and I went in just to meet up with her, but I got a way in and she had backup, so I stayed".

Sam's face softened when he spoke about his sister, he really admired her.

"Damian just got deeper and deeper and we didn't have solid evidence, so it took a while. He planned this whole thing for over a year, and then you walked into the middle of it".

"Why are you telling me this?".

"Because there's more to it than you know".

Sam waited for a retaliation, but it never came.

So he carried on.

"Sarah didn't plan on it, it just sort of happened. She was chasing her career and fell in love, before she could get out".

That right there, broke Andy's heart.

She could see that Bobby or Sarah or whatever her name was; really felt something for Damian, she just had no idea that it was that deep.

"She knew what she was doing, why she was there, but she chose her career over her heart because it was the right thing to do?".

Sam nodded, Andy pretty much summed it up. And Sarah had made the right choice- it was the right thing to do.

Andy knew that there was no getting a chance to fix it for them, Damian would probably get life in prison, and Bobby would be the cop that betrayed him. The one that put him there. That was all they'd ever have, and all they'd ever get.

"Sam, I don't get where this is going?".

"Everything was in place. We knew about getting the cars before the time, so Jerry had the SUV ready and waiting for me. He would start it, fill up on gas, drive it around the block and park it, for the day we were ready. All I had to do was take the car and they'd track it".

Andy was looking at Sam like she wished he'd just say what he came to say and leave, but he was working up the nerve to get there.

"I asked you to wait until two, in case I changed my mind about leaving you there. There was always the possibility that we would get away, that Jerry would miss the car moving. I... I was coming back for you that day".

Andy had been looking around the room, until Sam said that. Her gaze sweeping over to him as she listened.

"They were supposed to stop us before we traded cars, while we were in transit, and that didn't happen, so I figured it would take a while before we got out, so that's why we were in the house when the cops showed up. I came for you and Scott came after me".

"Why would you even do that? Risk two years of your life under to come back and get me?".

"Because I wasn't ready to let you go yet".

Andy's eyes broke their gaze first, she looked down like she didn't believe what he was saying.

"I was making the same mistake I was watching my sister make, and I saw what it did to her. I didn't want to feel the same way".

"That doesn't even come close. I'm not a possession, something you can have when you decide".

She just had it all wrong.

"Andy, I meant that Sarah traded her heart for her career. I wasn't about to do the same thing?".

"What does that even mean?".

Sam had never been a talker, he didn't say what he meant, didn't express his feelings, and he was having a hard time doing it now. Things just weren't coming out right.

"Do you really think you have Stockholm Syndrome?".

Andy knew that her face revealed her shock, there was no way that she could cover it up; even if she tried too.

"How do you know?".

"Just answer the question Andy".

"Fine, yes, okay, I think that's what this is".

"Then why did you lose it when you thought it was me under the tarp?".

"Because I thought you died Sam".

This wasn't getting them anywhere. They were going back and forth, neither willing to actually say anything that would stop the motion.

"I was never a threat".

"What are you doing? Why are you here? Sam you lied to me, when I was scared, when I didn't know if I was ever going to come home. When I thought I was going to die. And all you had to do was tell me the truth. You could have spared me all that fear, and misery. Everything I know about you is a lie. Except that your real name just happens to be Sam".

"I never lied to you, I just didn't tell you the truth".

"Same thing".

"No it's not. Everything that you know about me, is the real me, the only me there is".

Andy moved to walk away again, but Sam knew she couldn't go far, this was her home.

"Name one thing you never saw me eat".

"Eggs". He never ate eggs at breakfast.

"Favorite item of clothing".

"Jeans". He always had a pair of jeans on.

"How many jokes I mesmerized as a kid".

"One hundred and one". She added 'bad ones' silently to her sentence.

Sam had a point, she knew enough about him, to know something.

"Even when I told you about the three people I had killed, I was telling you the truth. I just didn't tell you that I was wearing a uniform when it happened".

"But you could have told me".

"Do you have any idea what they would have done to you if I got burned and you knew?".

Sam's eyes told her of the fear he had for her safety, when he told her that.

"Why did you kiss me?".

Did he really anticipate her answering that?

"Who did you kiss Andy? Me, Sam, or Sam the criminal?".

Sam saw the fear ebb its way into her eyes, she was scared and he had no idea why.

"I don't know". She didn't, she didn't know much of anything anymore.

"What do you want Sam? What is the point of this?".

Now came the hard part, answering that question.

Truthfully answering that question.

She had asked him it a few times, his answers being five minutes, or a chance to explain, but now his excuses had run out.

Now it was time to tell her what he really wanted.

"I kinda...I think I love you?"

****** thanks for reading!**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	20. Thank You

**As always thank you all for sticking with this & all you're awesome reviews!**

**Thanks to kelly2727 & the regulars! **

**Let's see how Andy takes the news:**

**Chapter 20- Thank You. **

Andy staggered backwards until she felt the couch against the back of her legs, and sat down.

They had moved around the lounge, so now she was standing in front of the couch rather than leaning against the back of it.

And Sam's words just stole her ability to even breath right now, not to mention the wobble her knees suddenly felt.

"Andy...".

She stared vacantly ahead of her, like Sam wasn't even there.

"I can't sleep if you're not there, I can't get you out of my head, you're always on my mind. I still smell you in the mornings when I wake up".

Andy had yet to say or do anything, she looked almost like his words had made her shut down.

It was killing Sam to know that he did that, put that look on her face. Like her heart was breaking.

"You don't even know me Sam, how can you...".

"I know enough".

"Like what?".

"You're stubborn, and strong willed, but it makes you passionate. You're so giving, and never ask for anything. You hate red, even though it looks good on you, your favorite color is blue. You love rainy days, and you like walking when it snows. You love fruit, and pasta and prefer water to soda".

Wow, he had been studying her.

"You love unconditionally".

The last part made her look up, her face still creased as she tried to keep the tears at bay.

"All I'm asking is for you too let your walls down Andy".

"Why, so we can try something based on a lie?".

"I never lied. Did you?".

Andy shook her head, everything he had seen, everything he described was the real her.

"And if it doesn't work?".

"Then we keep trying until it does".

How could he know what to say and when to say it?

"I just want a shot, a chance to let you get to know the real me".

Andy couldn't wrap her mind around everything. He had said so much that she was starting to believe him.

"I'm scared Sam..."

"Me too".

"Just one step at a time". Sam added, she was so hesitant and he couldn't blame her. He was a large part of the reason that she was scared.

"I don't think you do baby steps". She found a smile, it just seemed fitting.

"I would, for you".

"I need to think about it, get my head screwed on straight".

Sam nodded, a small wave of hope flickering, she hadn't said no.

"Get some sleep Andy". Sam leaned down and kissed the top of her head, before heading for the door.

"Sam?".

She called his name just as his hand reached for the door handle.

He turned to find her looking at him over the back of the couch.

"Thanks, you know for keeping your promise, and keeping me safe".

Sam smiled, one of those dimpled grins that he flashed way too seldom.

He left after that, feeling a little lighter than he had when he came over.

Andy found him outside her building the next morning.

She came out and saw the back of him as he walked away.

She jogged a little to catch up with him, her squealed "Stalking me?" surprising him.

He had intended on staying away, but couldn't.

So he drove to work, parked his truck and walked over to Andy's. He was planning on walking her to work, but changed his mind when he got to her doorstep.

Only to get caught before he made his escape.

"Something like that".

Andy found her blush, he made it appear naturally, and so easily.

Sam walked her to the barn, idle conversation made all the way until they arrived.

He held the door open for Andy, his hand finding the small of her back as he guided her through it.

Things felt different, like they were in another time, or existed in another universe.

But he felt like it was more normal- more them the way they should be.

Sam walked Andy through the barn all the way to the door of the women's locker room.

When they reached the boundary, Andy spun to face Sam, her teeth tucked over her bottom lip as she gnawed aimlessly on it.

"Can we um... Maybe do dinner?". Sam said leaning against the wall with his shoulder, once again suspended in her presence by the need to hover.

Andy looked up then down, then all around the hallway as Sam waited patiently for an answer.

She suddenly looked up, and shook her head a little.

"Sorry, I'm sitting for Traci, she has date night with Jerry".

Sam nodded, he really didn't expect it to be easy.

Nothing ever was.

Andy looked towards the door before moving in it's direction, "Rain check?".

That made Sam smile. Maybe it wouldn't be that hard.

But as days rolled into each other, it became increasingly difficult to get to see Andy or even schedule a date to collect on her 'Rain Check'.

His shifts were grueling and she was always out on patrol when she was on shift, or she would be sleeping when he was on shift and he was hitting the gym when she was sleeping.

Life was totally getting in the way.

Sarah had left a few days ago, returning home to her house in ST Catherines, with promises of plenty of calls.

Sam was really going to miss her, it was the first time that they had worked together; and it would be the last. He could never do that again; watch her go through the things she had too, to get the job done.

She was dedicated and passionate about the badge, but at the end of the day it just wasn't worth it.

Sam had seen Andy at the Penny twice- like tonight- since asking her out to dinner, but he never approached. She deserved time with her friends now that she was home.

"What is with that?". Traci muttered as she slid onto the empty chair next to Andy.

"With what?" Andy wasn't really paying attention to much of anything.

"That intensity". Traci said looking from Andy to Sam and back again.

"Nothing". Andy said looking down at her beer.

"Seriously? You know I'm not six right?". Traci couldn't hide the amusement in her voice. Andy was really only kidding herself.

"Funny". Was Andy's whimsical reply.

"Oh come on? What's stopping you? It is still there right?".

"Trace, it's complicated".

"How? I can't see how it's so complicated when it's so blatantly oozing out of you both"

Yup, that was Traci. The go getter.

"It'll go away, trust me. It always goes away".

"That's what's holding you back?" Traci was shaking her head.

"I don't want to base something off of a whole bunch of lies, and a whole lot of adrenaline. It's over- there is nothing there to go on".

"So that's why he's always watching you like he wants to devour you?" Traci let out a light giggle at that synopsis.

"Besides he lied".

"Andy, it was deep cover, he couldn't not lie".

"I spent weeks scared Trace, weeks wondering if I was going to come home alive or worse. All he had to do was... I dunno, give me a clue?". She was fumbling for excuses and she knew it.

"And now? You're safe and unharmed because he looked after you. He kept you safe Andy, doesn't that count for something?".

She knew Sam was watching them, she could always feel it.

She could still feel it, now that they were back to their normal lives. Some things had changed, others had stayed the same- like knowing when he walked into the room she was in or when he was watching her.

"He asked me out to dinner".

Crap, that wasn't supposed to come out.

"Andy!".

"You had date night anyway".

"I could have had date night at home".

Traci sounded like she was actually a little mad that Andy had chosen sitting Leo for her over a date with Sam.

"Okay, so I'm scared". Andy finally managed to whisper before looking up in time to see Sam look away.

"We all are, that's what makes it fun. Andy he's Jerry's best friend and I know that doesn't count for much but, Jerry's told me what he's like and some things he's done and the way he is and he is a good guy".

Traci had asked Jerry a barrage of questions about Sam when she found out that Andy was edging towards serious feelings for the guy.

Jerry had sat her down knowing that it wouldn't end until she had her answers, so he told her what she wanted to know.

The story sticking in her mind the most was the one where Sam's TO and close friend had turned out to be pheodiphile and took a little girl.

Jerry had told her how Sam had ended up putting the cop down, and that Sam chose to save a life over saving a friendship.

"Not all guys are keepers Andy, but I think Sam might be one".

Andy looked up to where Sam was sitting at the bar with Oliver Shaw, a jumble of confusion spilling over her yet again.

The thing was, now that they were home- now that they were back in real life, how could she trust that there could be anything between them that would last?

"So...?". Oliver said as soon as he sat down next to Sam.

"Yup". That wasn't really an answer, but Oliver hadn't really asked a question.

"Haven't seen you wearing that look for a while Brother". Oliver said as he lifted his beer bottle up to his lips to hide the smirk he felt begging to break free.

But Sam didn't answer, they'd been down this road before. A couple of times in fact.

Ever since Oliver had seen him back at the barn and commented on Sam holding onto 'his rookie', Oliver hadn't let it go.

It started with _'Uh-Oh'_ and ended with _'Trouble'. _

In between had been words like _'She's a rookie'_ and _'off limits'_ as well as some _'out of your league'_ that Oliver had thrown in there.

Sam agreed, Andy was out of his league, but Oliver didn't know her like he did.

They had; had this conversation and Sam wasn't in the mood for it again. He had listened to his friends concerns, but lately; it was as if Oliver had changed his opinion of _'Stay away'_ to _'just go for it'._

Sam figured that Oliver had changed his mind because he got to know Andy better recently by patrolling with her.

Oliver had mostly been bugged by the age gap between Sam and Andy, but Sam hadn't even considered that as a factor.

He didn't think Andy did either.

"You should just go talk to her Sammy".

"Think I haven't tried that?".

"Nope, if you had tried- we wouldn't be having this conversation".

Oliver was right, he hadn't really been trying. But he hadn't given up yet either.

"She's still adjusting to being back..."

"And you don't want to scare her right?".

Sam didn't answer, he was watching Andy- again.

"She'll get there".

"You know when someone says something, and even though you don't know them, you know they're telling the truth?". Andy waited for Traci to nod before she continued.

"That happened a couple of times too, and the things that Sam said he meant".

"Like what?".

"Things like _'guys like him and girls like me don't go together'_ for one".

"So that's what this is really about? Andy you can't seriously think that he meant that? I know you, and... Well, you must have done or said something?"

Oh boy, Traci knew her too well.

"He said it, after I kissed him. I know stupid mistake right?"

"Oh _riiiiggghhhttt! _I knew you did something. But seriously, go ask him". Traci was nodding towards Sam, Andy noticing that Oliver was leaving again.

"What? No!".

"I swear if you don't, I will".

Traci was really just trying to give her a push in the right direction.

"Dare me too?".

But right now, Traci wasn't kidding.

"No. Okay, you're right. Then maybe I'll feel better or this will be over...or whatever".

As soon as Oliver was gone, Sam noticed her presence as she slid onto the now empty chair beside him.

"Hi".

"Hey" he couldn't help the dimples flaring, they just wanted to flash at her.

"Can I ask you something?". She sounded hesitant asking that, as Sam turned to face her and took the sight of her in.

She looked really tired.

Like she hadn't been sleeping well lately.

"Why did you say that guys like you and girls like me don't go together when you knew you weren't really a bad guy?".

Suddenly everything made sense, her reluctance to just go to dinner, and her inconceivable ability to avoid him.

His words had lingered in the back of her mind and kept her from giving him a chance.

How stupid was that?

Words that now came back to haunt him- his own words.

*****thanks for reading, who's still with me?**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	21. Can't Turn It Off

**As always, wow you guys are amazing! Thanks for the amazing response to this!**

**Thanks to kelly2727 & the regulars! Shout out to Pretzel- Mandy lol. **

**Welcome to the newbies! **

**Chapter 21- Can't Turn It Off. **

"Need a ride home?". Sam suddenly blurted out. He was not doing this here.

"Traci...". Andy turned around to find Jerry sitting in the chair that she had occupied next to Traci. "Will be okay without me".

Sam dropped some cash on the bar while Andy went to say goodbye to Traci and hello to Jerry, collecting her jacket and purse as she did so.

Andy found Sam leaning against a silver truck in the parking lot when she came out of the Penny, she had wondered what kind of car he drove, and although it wasn't what she imagined; it suited him.

He opened the door for Andy before getting in and driving out of the Penny's parking lot.

He turned right, when he knew that a left was in Andy's condo's direction; but he wasn't taking her home to her house.

She noticed straight away that he wasn't taking her home but she didn't feel threatened. Sam noticed it too, so maybe he had been wrong about the lack of trust he thought she had in him.

After driving for a while they pulled up outside a house and Sam signaled for her to get out, so she did.

He walked around the front of the truck and reached out for her hand before leading her up a few stairs and towards the front door.

He fished keys out of his pocket and unlocked the door, ushering Andy in while he switched a few lights on.

When Andy looked up, she found Sam missing so she took the chance to look around. She took in the homey lounge and the few photos that adorned the walls.

"Want something to drink?". Sam asked, his voice pulling through her blank mind.

"I'm good thanks".

Now she looked nervous, like she felt out of place.

"Anything you want to know about me, you'll find here, anything else you want to know, you can just ask".

Sam's words kind of caught her off guard as she stared at him blinking rapidly.

Sam watched her bend down and look at the collection of photos on the lower shelf of the wall in the far corner of the lounge.

He was starting to understand why she was so reluctant to get any closer to him- she didn't really know him, or anything about him other than what she had learned when they were at the farmhouse.

He wasn't one for talking and divulging personal information, but if he didn't do something soon, he would loose his mind and she would be unobtainable.

So for her, he was willing to do what it took for her to get to know him, the real him.

Step one- bringing her home to his house.

Where she could still run, if she wanted too. But he was willing to take the risk. This time he wanted to see if she would stay because she wanted too.

"Why do you do undercovers?"

She finally broke the silence by starting with something easy.

"Nothing to make me want to stay?". It was true. He was good at it, loved doing it but he only did it because there was nothing keeping him at home.

"Gonna take another one?". She asked really softly, they were still aimlessly standing around in the lounge but he knew that she would sit down if she wanted too.

Sam couldn't help but wonder if that was another reason that she wouldn't let him in; her words of something about people leaving her drifting to mind.

"Maybe". He watched her as he answered, her face falling a little at his answer. "Unless there's something keeping me here".

That managed to earn him a timid smile, and a light blush. She knew that he was referring to her.

"Why aren't you married?". Andy clamped her mouth closed the second those words flew out. She seriously never intended on asking something that personal.

But it was too late to take them back now.

"Never wanted to be before".

She was sure that she saw Sam blush when he answered.

Andy took a breather and kept quiet for a while, making her way over to the couch and sat down.

Sam followed, sitting opposite her, if she wanted to talk he wanted her to see him when she asked a question and he answered.

"How's Bo... Sarah?".

"She's really good. She asks about you every time she calls. She feels really bad about everything. She'll be down soon for the trial...".

Andy had forgotten about that. Luke had given her a list of court dates that she had to be available for her court appearances.

"She really loves him doesn't she?".

"Yup". That was all he could say about Sarah's feelings for Damian.

"So why did you say it?". Back to her original question.

Sam shifted around uncomfortably, he had been hoping to avoid it, but now that really wasn't looking like it was going to happen.

"Because I was in trouble".

Andy stared at him like he wasn't making sense at all.

"I needed to push you away, and that was the only thing I could think of. I just don't know if I meant it then, or now too".

What was that supposed to mean?

"Real life, undercovers". Sam added to explain.

Not what she was hoping to hear.

"Why mean it about now?".

"Because I'm still in trouble, and we don't exactly have the safest jobs".

He had been worried about her safety everyday since she had been back at work. It was the reason that she was still riding with Oliver. He had requested it under the pretense of having Oliver keep an eye on her because he thought she was 'fragile' after her experience.

Frank bought it officially, but unofficially, he knew that Frank saw through the excuse.

"Trouble". Andy finally murmured, slightly under her breath.

Like she found the word ironic.

Sam really had no idea what more to say. He didn't do the whole relationship thing, so he was figuring it out as they went along.

He was also assessing them now that they were in a friendly environment, and now that they were themselves.

Although Andy had always been.

After a while Sam got up and headed into the kitchen, Andy following after the noise level rose drastically.

Leaning against the doorframe she found him setting out to make dinner, a shy smile falling over her lips as she watched him.

He found her watching him from the doorway, as he turned to find her looking like she suddenly felt like she belonged here.

She was doing that thing that drove him insane, where she would bite down on her bottom lip so hard that it would change color.

He would need to do something about that.

"I've still gotta feed you". Sam said before turning away, watching her any longer would cause him to do something that he would regret.

Sam made them dinner and coffee, Andy just lingering around watching him.

It was comfortable, normal and it felt right.

Andy did the dishes when they were done, refusing to let Sam help. Both of then avoiding the subject of her needing to go home.

They had more coffee after dinner, settled on the couch; Sam telling Andy stories of what it was like growing up with Sarah.

Sam took their empty coffee cups to the kitchen and came back, but didn't sit down. He stood in front of Andy and held out his hand.

She was trying to hide her yawns as she tried to stay awake a little longer. She was really tired.

In the two weeks that they had been back, he doubted that she had been getting much sleep; he knew he hadn't been.

It felt weird to suddenly have to sleep alone in an empty bed, without her. Even though he had slept perfectly fine in his own bed before he met her.

He dragged her through the house in silence and into his bedroom where he dropped his hand from hers and retrieved sweats out his cupboard for her.

Sleeping in jeans was uncomfortable, and it made her restless.

He left her alone and came back a short while later after locking up and switching the lights off, to find her already in his bed sound asleep.

He stopped in the doorway to take the sight in; it really felt surreal. But it looked perfect.

The next morning Sam woke up to Andy shifting around. She was still asleep, having crept closer during the night again.

But she was not sound asleep right now.

It was still dark outside, no sunlight peeking through the curtains, so it was really early.

Sam called her name and ran his hand over her hair, smoothing tousled strands out of her face as he leaned over her.

When her eyes snapped open, she blinked them rapidly like she was surprised to see him there.

"You okay?".

She could only nod to that question, not trusting her voice not to betray her right now.

Sam cocked his head to the side slightly, a sign that he really didn't believe her.

She still couldn't lie to him convincingly.

"Nightmare?". He could tell, he just knew when he saw her eyes milling around behind closed lids.

It was most likely the reason that she was so tired. She really wasn't sleeping.

"Wanna talk about it?".

Andy shook her head, she really didn't want to. Her face was still slightly scrunched up, a clear sign that the images in her mind were still vivid and fresh.

Sam moved away feeling like crap. It wasn't hard to ascertain what her nightmares were about, but she wouldn't share until she was ready too.

They were his fault, if things hadn't gotten out of hand she wouldn't be having them.

"They change. Sometimes you, sometimes Sarah. But it's always almost the same thing".

Sam had his head back down on his pillow, his eyes closed as his hand pinched the bridge of his nose.

He had; had a few too.

Then it was always Andy that got shot in the house and not Scott when she came running up the stairs in the middle of the gunfire.

But each time they ended the same, those lifeless eyes staring up at him from the floor when he went to say sorry.

Sam let go of his nose, and turned to face her, wide eyes peering at him in the dark.

"I really thought it was you".

Andy turned away and threw back the covers, defensive mode slipping over her face.

She had listened to what Sam had said earlier, really heard his words but still found the concept hard to believe.

She had tried convincing herself that it was going to go away, that she would feel differently but after spending time with him now; it only entangled her more.

Nothing had changed, she still felt the same.

Sam found her in the kitchen pouring herself a glass of water in the dark. She didn't feel the need to switch on any lights so he left them off too.

"Andy, I know it's hard but I need something to go on here".

He was guessing at what was going on in her head, and if he was wrong it could lead to them going down a road he didn't want to go down.

Andy downed the glass halfway before setting it down on the side of the basin.

Sam noticed her hand shake slightly as she let go of the glass, the clear liquid sloshing against the sides of the glass.

"Why is this so hard? Why can't I just accept it for what it is?".

Sam scratched the back of his head, she was about to have another meltdown, like she had the day he was packing his gear up at the house.

She would have more to say, when she was ready, so Sam waited.

"This is why I don't date cops, this is why I stay away from the whole bad-ass kind of guy, but it still doesn't work".

Sam cocked an eyebrow up at the bad-ass statement she had just made, hopefully that wasn't meant as a label for him.

She had tried to sum everything up into logic, each time the same single thought the answer.

Andy blew out a really long breath, her gaze shifting to the floor and hanging there.

"Andy?".

"I was so sure it was you Sam, and do you know what it felt like? Then you're there, and you're okay but you couldn't even look at me. In holding too, you looked away. But at the barn, you were always watching me, like you expected something from me, and I just don't know what".

When Sam answered he was a lot closer, his feet in view.

She felt Sam's finger graze over her chin as he lifted it up to find sadness in her eyes.

The cracks were finally starting to show.

"I didn't want to see you look at me like this. Like you hated me".

Andy's eyes shifted between his, looking for something. Maybe clarity, maybe confirmation.

"I tried to give you a clean break, but it isn't working really well". Sam added after a few heartbeats.

"Why would you do that?". Andy's voice was so frail he wasn't even sure that she knew what she was saying.

"Because I don't know what you want. I don't know if I'm ready for this".

Sam was still holding on to her chin, his other hand running up and down her arm as he spoke.

He wasn't sure if it was to sooth her, or pacify himself.

He ran his hand down her arm to her hand before lifting her hand up and putting it flat against his chest over his heart.

He wasn't big on words, but maybe if he showed her she would understand.

Andy let out a soft gasp when she felt Sam's heartbeat through the material of his shirt.

It was slow and stable for all of two seconds before it changed and became erratic and picked up its pace.

"I can't switch it off". Sam said as he pulled his hand away from hers still resting on his chest.

Sam suddenly took a step back, out of Andy's reach. Being that close to her wasn't helping his self control.

She still had this amazed expression on her face, like she was completely bewildered by what he had just shared.

And let her hand fall to her side, a large amount of fear slipping with it.

She had been scared that what was there had faded, but apparently she had been wrong.

"I need to go home" she suddenly blurted, Sam stepping to the side to let her pass when she ambled for the doorway.

Sam let her go.

He leaned against the wall, the cold seeping through his shirt.

That really hadn't gone well.

He had probably done what he really didn't want too; scared her away.

He found her ready to leave as soon as he threw some clothes on.

She had mumbled cab and one pointed look from him and she waited for him to get dressed.

Did she really think he'd let her catch a cab at four am?

He drove them to her condo, the silence escalating to awkward and uncomfortable.

He would steel glances her way, but she kept staring out the window.

When he pulled up outside her building, he turned to face her, her face really close as she leaned over to release her seatbelt.

She suddenly leaned closer, her lips brushing over his cheek as she whispered "Thank you" before opening the door and getting out.

Sam got out once she was through the front doors and waited for her lights to go on, so that he would know she was safely inside.

He just stood there wondering what he had done to deserve this kind of punishment.

*******Thanks for reading, hope you're still here & enjoying? Let me know! **

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	22. Call Me Cliche

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**Chapter 22- Call Me Cliche. **

Andy closed the door as soon as she was through it, and wondered what the hell she was doing.

She knew that she was running, she just hadn't figured out why.

Andy was pouring coffee when Sam came into the barn later that morning, she saw him walk in through the window; her eyes following him even though she didn't want them too.

"You know that's looking for trouble right?". Luke's voice suddenly filled the air next to her.

Andy looked down to find her hand pouring coffee into her cup until it ran over and spilled out all over the table.

Her mind had shut down when she saw Sam, all focus on pouring coffee seeping away.

"What is?" Andy asked as she took the rag that Luke was holding out for her.

"You and Swarek".

"No idea what you're talking about" Andy said, her hand mopping the spilled coffee up.

"Andy, the prosecution is going after Damian and Elliot. If they find out about you and Swarek, you'll be on the hit list too. So will he and Sarah".

Oh, right. He was talking about the case. He was lead detective on it so it would be his main priority.

"There's nothing to worry about" Andy said as she moved to get a new cup after disposing of her coffee-logged one in the trashcan.

Andy found her snow globe in her locker this morning when she came in and went to change.

He just had this ability to be able to get through any kind of barrier that stood in his way to accomplish his mission.

Except her walls.

He couldn't get over or through those because she wouldn't let him.

She found herself looking for him in Parade, but he was missing. She went by his office too when she left for patrol, but it was empty too.

Oliver was letting her drive, so she pulled the cruiser around the front and drove past the parking lot. His truck wasn't there.

He was definitely not here anymore.

Sam stared at Sarah like she was on fire.

"You have_ got_ to be kidding me". He was mad. Fuming. Pissed off.

"Sam, please. I don't ask you for anything, ever. But I'm asking you for this".

She had called him from his house just as he had pulled into the barn, hoping that she'd catch him before work, but she had missed him. So he came home instead.

"No".

"Sam please!".

"You have got to let it go. It's done Sarah, over".

She had told him that Damian had called and asked to see her.

And she wanted to go, wanted him to go with her.

"What if this is him trying to get to you?".

"It's not".

Yeah, like a cop going to see a criminal in jail awaiting trial wasn't kind of really screwed up.

"Sam, please. I want to do this. I need closure. You know what I'm going through, how would you feel in my shoes?".

Damn her and her intelligence. She was right and she knew it.

Sam called Frank and took a personal day, driving them down to the prison.

He waited outside after lengthy explanations of who Sarah was and who she was going to see.

The guards would keep an armed guard with her, and their visit was in maximum security, so there was no chance of physical contact.

It was glass windows and telephones.

Hours later, when Sarah came out, she was a mess.

Sam put her in the truck and drove her home. She didn't talk, just kept staring at the envelope in her hand.

When they got back to his house, Sam left her alone. If she wanted to talk, she would come find him on her own.

She did eventually, her hand holding out the envelope.

"For you and Andy. I don't want it".

She looked better, she had showered and stopped crying.

"With limitations". She added after a while.

The silence was driving Oliver insane.

He made Andy pull over and swap seats two blocks from the barn at the start of their shift.

She wasn't focused at all and just seemed like she was lost. Driving probably would not be a good thing right now.

Patrol was quiet, not many calls coming in, and she just kept herself withdrawn.

She hardly ate lunch and only had her coffee. Something was definitely wrong.

He tried calling Sam, but his phone was off, so that was no help.

When they pulled back into the barn after shift, Oliver asked Andy for her phone.

She handed it over without protest, his fingers hitting the keys quickly before he held it out.

"Call him". Oliver said as he got out of the cruiser, Andy's attention swaying to her phone as she found Sam's name and number programmed into it.

Andy changed into snug jeans and a jersey, debating if she should call Sam or not.

Traci had left her alone this morning when she ran into her in the locker room, and again now on the way out.

She sensed that Andy was really having a hard time so she offered her support and left Andy to figure it out on her own.

Closing her locker door and grabbing her bag, Andy went past Sam's office again to find the lights off.

Stopping outside the door, she sent him a quick text before leaving.

She didn't want to face him over the phone if he was mad at her and staying away because of it.

Sarah left after they had a long talk, Sam finally getting the chance to return Oliver's missed calls.

He had left his phone off not wanting distractions when he took Sarah to see Damian.

Oliver had told him that Andy had been quiet all day, that she was miserable and asked him what he had done.

He simply said nothing and hung up before racing out the door hoping that she decided to shower at the barn.

Now he was outside waiting for her after Noelle had told him that she was in the locker room when he went looking for her.

His phone went off, his heart skipping a beat when he saw her name flash across the screen.

He had programmed it in when Nash gave it to him, just in case he wanted to use it sometime.

The door opened just as he read her text, so looking up he found her coming out the barn, her phone still in her hand, but her mind so scattered that she didn't notice him.

She did eventually look up, and see him there, a lopsided grin on his face as he shook his head to answer her texted question.

She had asked him if he was mad at her.

He really wasn't.

She had stopped walking, a light giggle sounding through the air as she made her way towards him.

"Still stalking me?".

"Yup".

"Sam I shouldn't have...". She was totally ready to just jump in there and have this conversation there in the parking lot.

"It's okay".

"No it's not" she grumbled, a hint of seriousness wrapping around her tone.

"It was stupid".

"Andy..."

"I need to tell you something Sam".

That had him worried, she was looking away and shifting around nervously.

So he waited.

"I can't do this".

And there it was, what he feared it would be.

He had no idea why she felt that way, but it was clear that whatever her reason was; she was sticking to it.

"Andy..."

"No, don't. Please? I just... Can't".

Andy shifted her duffle bag strap around on her shoulder, her gaze sweeping up and down the street vacantly.

"I'm sorry, it's not you".

Yup, how cliche could she not sound right now.

She had spent the day trying to look at them through others eyes, and it just didn't make sense. She didn't like what she saw.

Because of what she saw in herself. How defendant she had become on him, how reliable he was and how he voluntarily was just...there.

She had changed since she met him; but they were good changes, not enough to scare her though.

Then there was the biggest deciding factor in all of her thoughts, the one that made her slam on the breaks so hard and so fast that it made the decision for her.

Andy shifted around looking uncomfortable, then she just turned around and walked away.

*****thanks for reading, more up soon!**

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	23. Faking Perfection

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**Welcome to my world if you're new!**

**Chapter 23-** **Faking Perfection. **

Sam watched her go, too stunned to stop her. Just when he thought that he was getting a little closer, things deviated from the plan.

Not that he really had a plan.

Later he was sipping whiskey at the Penny when Nash sat down next to him and ordered herself a beer.

She had just come in, and looked like she might know something he didn't.

"It's bad to drink alone". She said after taking her first sip.

Sam eyed the other patrons before lifting an eyebrow, trying to stop himself from just blurting out the question burning the tip of his tongue- What do you want?

"She doesn't know what she wants. No that's kinda wrong, she knows what she wants, she just doesn't trust herself with it".

Sam didn't say anything, just let his head hang down as he stared at his glass.

"Thank you, you know, for looking after her. No-ones ever done that".

Sam found that surprising. He knew Tommy McNally and that he used to seek solace in a whiskey bottle, but how could there not be anyone else looking out for Andy?

"Her mother took off when she was a kid, you know that right?".

Sam vaguely remembered hearing something to that effect, but it seemed almost forgotten until Nash mentioned it. He remembered the rumors that Mrs McNally had slipped away in the middle of the night, leaving her teenage daughter behind with her drunken father. Even then he couldn't understand how a mother could do that, how anyone could.

"You also know that Andy saw Guns and Gangs at the barn today right?".

That made Sam's head snap up, his eyes seeking out Nash's as her words made sense.

He hadn't been at the barn today, but that didn't mean that he didn't know that they had been there. He got that call alright. It ended with him hanging up on the caller, before he finished talking, right before he had called Oliver.

"She thought that they came for you, but we don't know if they did or didn't. She's scared of losing you".

Wow, she could just lay it all out there- without even taking a breath.

"All I'm saying is, everyone that she loves walks out on her, so she's letting you go before you have the chance to do that. She figures it'll hurt less that way. But she's letting you go too, because of something you said? It has something to do with your badge, I dunno".

Sam had been paying careful attention to what Nash was saying, but the last bit had him totally and utterly confused.

Nash was watching him expectantly, like she was waiting for some kind of reaction, but he knew that by sitting there and thinking- she wasn't going to get one.

And that's what he did, sat there and thought over everything. Even after Nash gave up trying to get through to him and left, he sat thinking.

Until, suddenly he remembered what he had said.

Andy's light were off, but he knew that she was awake, so he went up even though he ran the risk of her not even being there.

After a soft knock, she opened the door to Sam, looking really disheveled and out of focus.

"I thought..."

"Wrong, you thought wrong". He breathed the words out before she had a chance to finish her sentence.

She had probably thought that he was long gone by now, she hadn't seen him all day, and after seeing Guns and Gangs at the barn she was adding three and three and getting seven.

Sam walked past her and into her condo without an invitation, leaving her standing slightly behind him in stunned silence.

"They were there for me...". Andy's face fell, but she managed to cover it up quickly.

"But I said no".

"Why? It's what you do".

"Andy, I said that I would stay if there was something keeping me here, and you are. I don't want to go back to doing that".

"You love doing that".

"Yeah I do, but when you find something to replace one obsession with you don't care".

Andy did not appreciate that comment, and it showed.

"You make me want to be with you".

Her fierce scowl slipped off her face, a gaping stare replacing it.

"Sam, it's like making you give up your badge".

"No it's not. I'm right where I want to be, I want to be here. I don't want to be somewhere else, pretending to be someone else".

She knew what that felt like- pretending. She knew what it felt like to be faking it 'till you made it too.

But it didn't make up for the fact that besides that their timing was off, she wasn't about to make him give something he loved doing up, not for her.

"I can't do this. Not now, the trials coming up and this could totally screw it all up".

Sam flashed his dimples at that. She really was an honest cop.

"Damian pleaded out".

"What?".

"He pleaded out, took a life sentence, with no chance for parole. Signed confession too. For everything".

Wow, that was unexpected.

"Sarah...?".

"She knows. Um..." Why was this still so damned hard?

Andy grabbed them each a beer out the fridge, Sam insisted on calling for takeout when he asked her if she had eaten yet, and she didn't answer.

"How do you know he pleaded?"

They were sitting in the lounge waiting for dinner to arrive.

"He called Sarah yesterday and asked her to come see him, so I took her up there this morning".

Andy's face dropped at Sam's words. He knew that she was wondering how hard it had been on Sarah.

"He um... He told her that he loves her too and that she needs to let him go now. He understands why she did what she did. He signed a full confession and agreed to the sentence with some stipulations, but it's finally over"

"Sarah okay?".

"No". She was a mess.

Damian had never told her how he felt, not until today. And it literally broke her.

"She's never going to get over this". Sam looked away when he said that.

"Why not? In time..."

"Nope, _never_". Sam said looking back at Andy lifting his beer to take a sip.

"How can you say that?". Where had his support for his sister suddenly gone?

"She won't Andy. Not ever. Because Swarek's only love once. Only ever love one person".

Andy choked when he said that, his timing a little off with her deciding to take a sip of her own beer at the exact moment that he said that.

"You can't say that".

"It's in our genes Andy. Trust me".

It was, it was the same with his birth parents. His grandfather and his uncle. Even his cousin, they only ever loved one woman.

This he learned when he finally tracked them down after he turned eighteen. They had all passed on now, he was kind of a late lamb and was born when his parents were deep into their thirtys.

"But you're not related". Andy countered as she stood up.

"It's in my genes. All the men in my family have only ever loved one woman. And Sarah- it's the only time she's ever really loved anyone like that".

Andy stopped walking away but didn't look at him.

When she did, she suddenly spun around, her mouth opening and closing like a fish.

"Then you can't...".

Here we go, again with the denial.

"Why are you fighting so hard against this?".

Since they had been back, Sam had virtually been begging for a chance, and she was blocking him at every turn, like she was enjoying giving him the run around.

Andy had her arm's crossed over her chest, her eyes fluttering over the room as she looked for a plausible answer.

"It's the way it has to be Sam".

She sounded so sure of herself, so convinced.

Andy stepped forwards and grabbed her beer bottle, taking a long sip as she fled into the kitchen.

Sam followed and found her bent down and digging around in the fridge, the open door shielding her from view.

When she stood up straight and closed the door, Sam was there just like she expected him to be.

"I'm not giving up". He whispered out, his hand reaching for her.

Before she had time to move away, or even think about moving away Sam had pulled her closer.

Really close.

She was expecting him to kiss her, but he didn't. He was just peering down at her like he was waiting for something.

She was doing that thing with her lip between her teeth again, Sam's hand moving up to let a finger rest on her lip to get her to stop doing it.

She did, but it didn't change her expression in any way.

"Why won't you give us a chance?". There he finally asked the question that was bugging him the most, now he just had to wait for her answer.

"I don't know". That was surprising.

"I...". She really didn't have a clue why she wouldn't. It wasn't that she didn't want too.

She was scared that one day, he'd walk away. Or she would want too. She was scared that one day she'd wake up and he'd be gone, slipping out in the middle of the night for another two year UC. Or one that he wouldn't come back from.

But his words milled around in her head, the fear dissipating a fraction.

Andy cleared her throat and let her eyes flutter around the room before her face turned serious and she allowed herself to look back at Sam.

"What if I screw it up?". Andy muttered under her breath, but Sam caught it.

"Andy, you were born to make mistakes, not to fake perfection ..."

His words made her relax a little, her weary face softening a little.

"I need to tell you something". She mumbled, her lips barely moving to pronounce her words properly.

But Sam was patient, he could wait until she was ready to say what she needed too.

"I..". That so wasn't the way to start.

Andy took a deep breath, and tried again.

"The thing is... I think I kinda love you too?".

And that scared her.

She hadn't been counting on Sam's huge smile as his lips curved up. It was as though her words made him happy.

"Is it enough for now?". Andy blurted out. Catching Sam off guard.

"It's enough. More than enough". Sam whispered. For now anyway.

Andy was still wearing a guarded look. Like she was still trying to decide if she really wanted this or not.

"What?". Sam said knowing that he had to start somewhere if he wanted to know what was going on in her head.

"What if it doesn't work, you know because its different? Because this is the real us and we can't run away from it this time".

Compatibility.

That's what worried her?

Would they be compatible as themselves?

"Then we work on it".

Man, she was so stubborn.

"Okay, one date". She blurted out as she looked up at him, her damned lip caught between her lips again.

_"One?"._

Andy nodded.

And that was all she was going to give him. One date, one shot at trying this out, one chance to see if this would work.

"Okay, one date it is".

He had absolutely no idea how she planned on finding an answer if she only let him take her out on one date, but he would find a way to make sure that after one date, she would want more.

******thanks for reading, kinda looks like we're finally getting somewhere!**

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	24. Dinner Dates

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**Welcome to the newbies!**

**Chapter 24- Dinner Dates. **

Sam left Andy's that night with his mind tangled up in knots.

He was over the moon that he was one step closer, but it wasn't even really half a chance.

He kept the temptation at bay to kiss her, he wanted too; really badly- but wouldn't risk it. Not when there was that much to loose.

Andy woke up refreshed for the first time in what felt like forever the next morning.

Ever since she had seen that yellow tarp, she had been having nightmares about Sam getting shot and it was causing serious sleep deprivation and exhaustion.

Then there were the times that her mind just roamed in idiocy as she dug deep for excuses to push Sam away. She had been scrounging for excuses and now that there were none left, she wondered why she had even been looking for any in the first place.

She had spent weeks trusting Sam the stranger, the criminal with her life so it wasn't a trust issue.

She had been hesitant but he had proven that he had never lied, when he became the good guy he was totally honest with her.

Then she thought that maybe it was Stockholm because her feelings were so intense that she needed a label to put on them because she was unsure- yet that label didn't quite fit right.

Then Luke warned her off with the possibility of anything more contaminating the DA's case and making him go after Sam and Sarah, that wasn't even a possibility in her mind. She couldn't let that happen, so she walked away only to have Sam chase her even harder.

Most of the time spent lying in bed didn't allow her mind too ever shut off, so she was mentally drained too.

But last night she had slept through, not once waking up to the vivid images that so blatantly terrified her dreams.

She grabbed a shower and was just about to leave for work when she opened the door to find Sam with his hand poised to knock.

His response was a magnificent dimpled grin as he saw her flush at finding him standing there unexpectedly.

"Need a ride?".

She smiled and nodded, it was really cold today.

Sam drove them to the barn, and went straight past it, Andy's eyes shooting to find him looking at her with a fair amount of amusement.

"We need coffee"he stated as he looked at her for a split second before focusing his eyes back on the road ahead of them.

Minutes later Sam pulled up outside a diner and motioned for Andy to get out, her brows furrowing as she thought of getting out the warm truck and into the cold.

When she made it inside the diner, she could feel her nose turn pink from the cold. But at least it was warmer in here.

Andy followed Sam expecting him to head in the direction of the counter, but instead he headed towards a booth at the back.

Andy stopped and waited for Sam to sit down, his automatic reaction to seek her out when he found her missing.

He just shrugged and nodded towards the seat across from him. She wouldn't stand there all day.

When she slid into her side of the booth, the waitress was already next to them waiting to take their order.

Sam ordered for them both, and added bagels to their coffees, Andy's eyebrow raising in silent question.

He could read her mind in that instant; she was wondering if this was 'The date'.

But it wasn't, this was him simply playing for time.

He needed to prolong that date for as long as possible, just to get her to see that things could work and that he'd be around for them to work.

He knew that she had issues- trust issues, acceptance issues, hell she even had issues sleeping at the moment. There was only one way that he could think of to make this work. He had to break through her walls no matter how long it took.

Andy's nose crinkled up when their coffee and bagels arrived, the smell making her get that familiar twinkle in her eye that told him she was hungry.

They kept the conversation light and comfortable, drifting over subjects that were far from causing any discomfort.

Sam asked for the bill when the waitress came to collect their dirty dishes, Sam watching Andy watching him as she tried to decide if this was the date or not. She was clearly still so undecided.

"It's not...". Sam's phone ringing cut all words short as he reached into his pocket to answer the call with a smile.

Andy instantly knew who it was from the look on Sam's face.

"Hey".

"Sammy".

"You miss me already?".

"Oh you're so funny, I always miss you. How's Andy?".

"Good. Fine".

"Sammy! That is not what I was hoping to hear".

"Well, you know how things go".

"Can't you talk? Wait...she's with you isn't she?".

"Yup".

"Let me talk to her".

"Sarah..."

"Just give her the phone Sam".

Andy was surprised when Sam pulled the phone away from his ear and held it out towards her.

Andy reached out and took the phone, a weak smile playing over her lips.

"Hi?". Great, her opening words came out sounding feeble.

"Hey Andy, how are things?".

"Okay?".

"Just okay? You're having breakfast or coffee with Sam, and things are just okay?".

"No! It's not..."

Arg, Sarah so had the wrong idea.

Sam watched Andy furiously blush, and hoped that Sarah had not just screwed this up by saying something completely inappropriate.

"So, I'm coming down on friday night, are you going to come to dinner. At Sam's?".

"No I don't think..."

"Okay, I'll tell him to pick you up, or bring you over after shift".

"Sarah, no..."

"Andy please? I'm trying to make this right".

Andy sighed into the phone, she really didn't want to do this.

"Let me talk to Sam again".

Andy mumbled a bye and handed Sam his phone back, her face all crinkled up.

"Sarah...". Sam's voice droned out in warning.

"Relax, it's just dinner on friday night so I dunno, pick her up, bring her home after shift".

Sam's face curved up into a giant smile when he heard that. Sarah had unintentionally just done him a huge favor, and she didn't even know it.

"Okie Doke". Sam said hanging up.

This could actually be a really good thing.

But Andy looked uncomfortable, like she wasn't as thrilled as he was right now.

Sam nodded towards the door, keeping conversation to a minimum. They had to get to work so their early morning coffee was over.

Tuesday rolled into wednesday, then thursday, and finally friday.

Sam had been picking Andy up in the mornings and dropping her off at home after shifts. And things were just not progressing.

He had told her that they could head straight out to dinner after shift this morning on the way in to work, and that she could grab a shower at his house instead of the barn if she wanted too. That had resulted in her gaping at him and turning a light shade of pink.

He however, didn't see the problem with that. She had a perpetual need to shower after shift and nine out of ten times she had done it at the barn before he took her home for some odd reason.

"I just don't want Sarah to wait too long alone with a bottle of wine". Sam had added afterwards trying to lighten the mood.

That seemed to reassure Andy.

Now, hours later they were pulling up to Sam's house; Andy looking like she was ready to welcome the earth opening up and swallowing her.

Sam grabbed their bags off the back seat as Andy stood next to him looking at his house like it was about to collapse on her.

She reached out to take her bag, but Sam took her hand in his instead surprising her, and even himself.

What surprised him even more was the fact that Andy let him hold on to it and allowed herself to be led into the house.

Mouth watering smells and bright light welcomed them as soon as they entered the house, Sarah banging around in the kitchen as she carried out whatever task she was busy with.

Sam slung their bags off his shoulder and dropped them to the floor as they moved through the house towards the kitchen, but he didn't let go of Andy's hand. If it was up to him, he'd eat dinner with one hand if he got too hold on to hers for the night.

"Smells good" Sam said as they stopped in the kitchen doorway, Sarah smiling up at them when she noticed their presence.

Making her way over to them Sarah enveloped Sam in a hug first, then Andy who missed Sam's hand the instant it left hers.

"So glad you came" Sarah said as she stepped back and looked at Andy. Her smile was ridiculously huge.

Sam ushered Andy upstairs to take a shower, giving her directions on where to go as he retrieved her bag and held it out for her.

Within seconds, she had disappeared from sight.

"You hungry?". Sarah asked as Sam sniffed around in the various dishes she began pulling out of the oven.

"I didn't eat the entire week after you said you were coming". Sam said with a wigggle of his eyebrows.

Sarah was one hell of a cook, she should have become a chef rather than a cop.

"So do we have a label here or are we...".

Arg, she just couldn't let it go. Five minutes in the door and she was already on his case.

"Nope". Sam said sticking his finger into a glass bowl that he had just lifted the lid off.

"Why not?".

"It's complicated. She has a lot of trust issues but she understands what I want".

That statement right there made Sarah freeze.

"You actually told her? And made your intentions clear on where this is going?"

Sam nodded.

"As in you said the actual words?".

Sam nodded again.

"For real?".

_"Yes"_ Sam finally growled out. Why was it so hard for her to get it?

"You're really doing this? Going after her?".

"If she let's me".

Sarah's wide smile dropped at hearing that. It was the first time she'd ever seen Sam so intoxicated by a woman, and if he said actual words to said woman about it, then it was serious.

"She gave me one date. What am I going to do with one date?". Sam could hear the frustration in his own voice as he said that.

"One date? This isn't..."

"Nope".

Sarah looked relieved when Sam answered.

"Sammy, it's never easy. It's going to be hard, but she's a keeper. I can't tell you what to do, other than do something you. She doesn't seem like the kind of girl that likes too be lavished with flowers and showered with gifts. Just do what feels right".

Sarah was only four years older than he was, but she had the wisdom of ten people at the age of eight-five.

Andy emerged freshly showered shortly after Sarah had stopped talking.

Sam grabbed himself a beer out the fridge and looked towards Andy about to ask her what she wanted when Sarah held out a glass of wine towards him to pass on to Andy.

Sam took the glass hesitantly, not sure if Andy even drank wine. He'd only ever seen her drink soda, water, coffee, whiskey and beer.

"Wines fine thanks". Andy said sensing Sam's hesitation as she reached out for the glass. He handed it over without giving it a second thought.

These teeny-tiny little things were things that he didn't know about her, but wanted too so badly.

Sarah yelled out that dinner was ready so they moved to the lounge where Andy noticed the dining room table already set for three. Sarah was so sure that she would be here it made her wonder if Sam had known about this before Sarah had mentioned it.

Dinner was delicious, Sarah really having gone through painstaking trouble to make sure that they had something of everything on their plates.

They carried out light conversations, ranging over broad topics as they ate, the awkwardness that had been present when they first arrived having faded.

After dinner Andy helped Sarah clear the table as Sarah told Sam to scoot.

Most of the kitchen was already cleaned up, so they only had a few dishes to work through.

Andy had the feeling that she was in for a little more than just soapy water and dish towels when Sam left them alone.

Sarah ran water into the basin and added soap before shoving a few items into the water, Andy being ignored until Sarah was happy that the basin was full enough.

"Can I ask you something?" Sarah suddenly blurted as she finally let her attention flow to Andy.

"Yeah sure".

"If Sam wasn't UC, and he was really a criminal, what would you have done?".

Her question shocked Andy so much that she looked away unable to answer the question.

It was something she hadn't really even thought about.

"You don't know?".

Andy shook her head, she really had no idea.

For some reason, Sarah smiled at her answer; even though it wasn't really an answer.

"Think about it, and when you know, tell Sam".

Sarah turned away and began washing the dishes without saying another word.

When they found Sam in the lounge, Andy looked between him and the door. It was her way of saying that she was ready to go home now.

"I'm just gonna...". Sam said standing up and looking at Sarah.

Sarah gave Andy a warm hug as they said their goodbyes, Sam picking Andy's bag up and grabbing his keys.

Andy felt different since he left her alone with Sarah. Her whole mood had shifted to something else, and Sam had no idea what because he was still learning all about her.

Driving Andy home, Sam watched her stare out the window as she bit her lip and lost herself to deep thoughts.

When Sam pulled up in front of Andy's building he almost wanted to invite himself up just to be around her a little longer.

"I had fun thank you". Andy murmured as she unclipped her seat belt.

It made Sam's dimples flare as she finally looked like she was back to her old self.

"Me too".

Sam got out and grabbed Andy's bag for her before handing it over as he noticed the subtle withdrawal she made into her shell.

Andy took hold of her bag and lifted her hand in a little wave before she spun around and headed for the buildings front door. "Night Sam".

Sam watched her go leaning against his truck; she got all the way up to the front door where she stopped and turned to face him.

"Can we do date night tomorrow night?" Andy called out across the few feet that separated them.

It made Sam feel the sudden onset of panic. It was too soon.

But yet he found himself nodding at her request, his lips unable to move.

They had the weekend off, so the whole saturday and sunday were there's to do with as they pleased, and yet he was hoping to find a way to get her to do something without it actually being their 'one date'.

Andy flashed him a mega-watt smile before taking a step backwards and retreating from sight.

On the drive home Sam racked his brain to find one solution to the impending problem with time having run out.

He thought of every possible thing that could be considered as date material, each time not happy with what he was thinking.

When he finally pulled into his driveway one thought stuck out the most.

He was totally screwed.

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	25. Just Us

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**Chapter 25- Just Us. **

Andy was incredibly nervous.

More than she had been on prom night, or the day that she had joined the academy. More than any other day- ever.

Sam sent her a text early this morning telling her to be ready at six and that was all.

No 'how's your day been?' No hint as to where they were going. Nothing.

Three times during the day she had picked her phone up intending on sending a reply and canceling, but she just didn't have it in her too do it, so she forgot about it until the urge resettled over her.

When she came home last night she mulled some more over Sarah's question as she had done on the drive home.

The more she thought about it, and the more she changed her mind, the less her heart or mind would cooperate.

That's how she ended up blabbing out that she wanted a date tonight.

Now at five-thirty, she was seriously second guessing her ability to do just one thing right.

Checking her reflection in the mirror, Andy was satisfied with what she saw. She had added a little more makeup than she would normally wear, and she had left her hair down.

She decided on jeans and a white thermal shirt, plain and simple. And just her style.

She heard the knock on her front door way before it was due, and that just caused a new range of doubt to flow through her.

She found Sam smiling on the other side when she opened it, she had tugged on the handle almost as if she was hoping it would be a neighbour and that he wouldn't show.

"Ready?".

Andy nodded, grabbed her keys, a jacket and her purse and closed the door behind her as they left.

Sam opened her door for her when they got to the truck, Andy smiling shyly as she climbed in.

He noticed the blush too, she really wasn't used to people doing small things like that.

When Sam pulled away from the curb Andy watched him follow a familiar route that led them all the way to his front door.

She didn't say anything, or seem uncomfortable, so Sam took it as a good sign.

He really wasn't into the whole dating scene, so tonight he was just going with his gut.

Sam let them into the house, Andy still keeping on her brave face as they walked in through the front door.

Sam had cooked, she could smell the aroma as soon as her feet made it inside.

Sam headed straight for the kitchen and grabbed two beers out of the fridge. He unscrewed the caps and handed Andy her's which she took with a slightly shaky hand.

Sam moved away and Andy leaned against the kitchen counter watching him as he set to work.

She would sip on her beer and just watch him.

Words were totally nonexistent, but it wasn't tense, it was a relaxed atmosphere.

Sam would occasionally glance up at Andy to find her watching him intently, her features softer than they were when they had first arrived.

But he was content to just let her watch.

After a while Sam was done so he grabbed himself another beer, the first one was swallowed way too quickly in a bid to calm his nerves.

(Ha, Sam Swarek nervous. What an impassive thought.)

He had checked on Andy's beer and she was only half way so he skipped her refill for now.

Setting his beer down Sam took Andy by the hand and tugged her towards the lounge where he motioned for her to sit down while he lit the electric fireplace.

It had started snowing again, so the temperature had lulled a little lower and Andy's nose was turning pink even though she still had her jacket on.

Andy sat down on the couch closest to the fireplace, the warmth immediately felt as it radiated from the flames.

Sam left her alone then, retreating back to the kitchen, giving her time to think.

She found his choice of a date rather surprising, usually a guy would have picked something a little more flaunty or flashy for a first date, but not Sam. No; he went with simple.

"Dinner's ready". Sam's voice startled her, she had been so wrapped up in her own world that she didn't hear him come back into the room.

Andy followed Sam into the kitchen, a plate handed to her as soon as she crossed the threshold. Andy dished up for herself and then took the fork that Sam held out without saying anything before trotting back to the lounge and resuming her seat.

When Sam sat down next to her Andy flashed him a small smile. A first dater wouldn't do that either. He wouldn't want to cross those boundaries.

"Mmmm this is really good" Andy said between bites. Sam had made a chicken salad, and bacon cabanara pasta. It was totally worth starving herself all day for. She couldn't eat because she was too nervous, so she skipped lunch and stuck to coffee.

By the time they were done eating they seemed to find small moments to say something in, words coming easier than they had an hour ago.

Sam reached for Andy's plate when she was done and carried both plates to the kitchen.

He set them down in the basin and was about too ask Andy if she wanted something to drink when he noticed her leaning against the wall behind him.

"Can I ask you something?".

Sam ignored the dishes and gave her his full attention, his head moving up and down in reply to her question.

"Why did you pick this as a date?".

That, he had not bargained on. A question behind his motives.

"Because it felt right?".

Andy's eyes closed to slits as she let his words roll around in her mind.

"No movies, or restaurant?".

"Nope".

Andy was showing signs of being frustrated by his answer. It wasn't what she wanted.

"Andy, it's not us. I don't want to do something that's forced and faked. I just want us".

Andy gaped at Sam like he had just said something totally unexpected. Was it too much, or was it disappointment maybe?

"Can I ask you something?".

Sam had a few questions of his own, he just figured that he'd have them answered before they actually got to date night.

"Would you have waited if I went to jail?".

Wow, that was even more unexpected than anything she had ever experienced.

"Um..."

She just didn't know how to answer that question. Although she did have an answer.

Sam saw her hesitation and reluctance to answer as she looked down at the floor rather than at him.

Sam edged closer to Andy, stopping just a few feet away. He wasn't going to press her for an answer, he just wanted one so badly to that question that he just threw it out there.

He had already heard Andy say that she thought that she had feelings, but she was so confused that she wasn't sure anymore. All he wanted for tonight was to add a little clarity and help her admit that she wanted more than one date.

"Forget that one, here's another. What are we doing? 'Coz right now, I have no idea".

Andy looked up to find Sam closer, her mind coming to a complete standstill.

"I don't know Sam".

"Then tell me what you want to do, or what you want me too do".

Sam had stepped even closer, his hands moving up to rest on the wall beside Andy's head. He had her blocked in, but there was more than enough space for her to slip through under his arm's if she wanted to move away.

Andy sucked in a deep breath, her bottom lip rolling into a resting place between her teeth.

"I don't want one date Andy, I want them all".

Sam was so close that his breath fanned out across Andy's cheek as he spoke.

Sam had told Andy that he thought that he might be in love with her, but now he knew he was. The time that they had been back had given him enough space to evaluate and assess his feelings and emotions, and he was beyond a doubt absolutely certain that he was, and he was betting that she was too.

He fell hard and fast, but he had know all along that it would be her. The second he saw her outside that bank he knew.

The first time he touched her he knew.

In the instant that she had hurled the can of soda at him, he knew.

Now he just needed her to know it, without adding more uncertainty to her feelings.

"Tell me what to do Andy".

His words had barely left his lips when Andy moved forwards and suddenly claimed his lips.

Her motions caused Sam to freeze up momentarily, his heart skipping a beat and his breath catching in his throat.

As soon as his lips responded, Sam pulled away a gutted groan escaping him as he did.

His hands had left the wall, one tangled in her hair; the other resting on her cheek. He hadn't even realized that he had moved them.

"Andy..."

"Sorry, I shouldn't have". Andy stammered, looking away.

It wasn't that he didn't want to kiss her, he just wanted to know that she would let him do it for the rest of forever.

"I want you to kiss me, but I want you to do it everyday. If you're not willing to do that, then I can't start this knowing that's one day it won't be there".

Andy's eyes slithered back to his, his thumb tracing aimless patterns on her cheek as it absorbed the feel of her skin under his hand.

"Before I said I think I love you, well I don't think I do, I know I do, and I know that you still have your doubts but I want to prove it to you. Prove that I'm not going anywhere, prove that I want this. That I want you".

Andy was still staring at Sam, her face remaining neutral.

He was having a hard time getting a read on her, and right now it was killing him.

"You love me?". Andy's voice was so shaken that Sam was surprised that she got the words out.

"From day one, since the first time I saw you".

Andy pinched her eyes closed, her head leaning back so that it rested against the wall behind her.

Just when Sam thought that they were about to drown in the silence between them, Andy's eyes opened, a really enormous smile on her lips.

"I would have waited".

It took Sam a few seconds to understand what Andy was saying, and to know that she wasn't just blurting out some random thought.

"Yeah?".

Andy nodded, "For this moment; I would have waited".

That was all Sam needed to hear. It was her way of saying that she would let him have more than one date, that she would give him a chance because she felt something too.

Something real.

"Can I kiss you now?". Andy asked in a fit of giggles, her cheeks creeping into a bright red.

"Well, it's the third date technically, so it is the kiss date".

*******Thanks for reading, how'd you think that went? **

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	26. Going Back

**Wow you guys are amazing! Thank you all for the awesome reviews!**

**Thanks to the regulars & kelly2727, welcome to the newbies!**

**Chapter 26- Going Back. **

Six months had passed quickly, the dark grey clouds turning to bright sunshine and green leaves as the cold faded away to be replaced with spring and finally summer.

They'd been going strong with the standard issue ups and downs that any relationship had, but they hadn't really moved forwards.

Sam would stay over at Andy's or she would stay over at his house, but Sam was listless. It wasn't enough anymore.

She was enough, she was all he had ever wanted- but the whole not moving forwards thing was starting to get to him.

So he had it all planned out, he was going to share his secret with her (his envelope from Sarah) and then he had this whole big speech planned out.

It was all perfect.

They had an off weekend together; which didn't happen frequently, so Sam got Andy to pack an overnight bag and have it ready for when they came off shift on Friday morning.

He had told her that they were going to go away and saw the recognition on her face as she assumed that they would be going to visit Sarah, because that had been a regular occurrence. He didn't correct her trail of thought, but rather left it too linger as part of his plan.

They went home and slept until lunch time when Sam woke Andy up with coffee and a ham sandwich.

They slipped through the shower before Sam lugged their bags to the truck and they set out on the road trip.

Sam watched as Andy paid little attention to her surroundings as they drove, they had; had a rough shift so he left her to rattle her brains over her shift as he concentrated on driving.

Twenty minutes later Sam pulled off the tarred road and onto a gravel driveway before a familiar sight made Andy turn to face him, her face turning red as she glared at him.

He knew that he would risk facing the wrath of Andy McNally; the one that he first saw when they met, but this was something he had too do.

"Sam, are you kidding me right now?". Andy practically yelled at him as she took in the sight of the house, and the green trees that hung to the left of it.

Sam avoided eye contact in that moment, he knew that he was guilty, and was banking on putting the truck in park and turning off the ignition before he let her get really mad.

"Forty miles? Sam really? It's not even forty miles from here to your house".

Andy undid her seatbelt and slid out of the truck as soon as he pulled to a stop. She slammed the door closed behind herself, but didn't venture away.

She stood next too her closed door, hands on her hips, eyeing the house from where she stood.

Sam got out and rammed his hands into his pockets as he looked between Andy and the house they had stayed in for weeks under false pretenses.

"Sam?". Andy's voice had turned from fierce to soft and withered as she walked up to him and asked a thousand questions with one word- his name.

"I know okay. But running in that direction- it is easily forty miles. I just didn't tell you that the road out of here was outside the front door".

"Why Sam? Why wouldn't you do that?".

Arg, really. They had been through this.

"Nevermind". She added after taking a long breath. "Why are we here?".

She noticed that Sam moved to grab their bags out of the truck. They were staying- this was their destination.

"I'll explain everything soon, I promise". Sam said heading for the front door.

He knew that coming here was risking a lot. It was risking her letting him in, risking what they had. Risking all the issues and insecurities that she had let go of.

Andy followed Sam into the house at a snail's pace; it was almost like she didn't want to be here.

Sam was gone from sight when Andy's mind focused. She took in the room and noticed the changes. The fresh coat of paint, and lack of furniture. It even smelled different.

Sam watched Andy as she looked around the empty rooms, her mind envisioning the pieces of furniture that were now gone from sight.

"You mad at me?". Sam whispered as he slipped up behind her.

"Yes". Andy grumbled, but she knew that it was feigned.

"So maybe this will earn me some forgiveness?". Sam said slipping his arm around her waist and holding out his hand in front of her, his chin resting softly on her shoulder.

Sam opened his hand to reveal Andy's earrings, earning a soft gasp from her. "My mom's earrings". Andy sighed as she reached out to take them. It was the only thing that she had left of her mother, and the only thing she had left behind that meant anything. Her dad had given the earrings too her when she turned sixteen because they were the diamond earrings that he had bought her mother as a wedding gift and she had left them behind when she took off in the middle of the night.

"Guess where I found them?".

Andy giggled a little, she knew exactly where they were- stuffed between the mattress and the base of the bed he had handcuffed her too, completely forgotten until now.

"Want something to drink?". Sam suddenly said pulling away.

Andy's eyebrows furrowed at the thought, sam letting out a laugh in reply. "It's all fresh stuff I brought down yesterday".

"So you planned on bringing me here?".

Great, sulky Andy was back.

Sam left Andy to mill around while he went to get them each a soda, it was too early for alcohol, and too hot for coffee.

Hours later, Sam pulled Andy out of the house and onto the back deck where he had a swing chair waiting for them.

Dinner was done, and conversation minimal, she was still mad at him; but not as much as he had expected her too be.

"So, what would you say if I said I want to move out here?". Sam suddenly blurted out after they sat in silence for almost what felt like a really, really long time.

Andy's head lifted up off his chest where she had it resting to stare him squarely in the eye.

"Like too live here?".

"Yup".

Andy put her head back down, but her lips didn't utter a single syllable.

"Would you?". Sam said after not giving it any more thought.

Andy's head popped up again, her face crinkled.

Her lips formed into a tight line as he peered down at her, her face lost in weighing up her options.

"Like to live here? With you?". Andy finally whispered out really quietly.

Sam nodded, he didn't want to be overbearing so he decided against saying any more right now.

Andy looked a little conflicted, like she needed to think about it, so Sam moved so that she would sit up and look at him.

"Damian wanted to see Sarah too give her everything he had, including this property".

Andy's eyes widened at Sam's explanation.

"She gave it to...". Why was it still so hard to say what he wanted too?

Ever since the day they had their first date they had been on the same page, yet he just couldn't bring himself to say those three little words again after that day. It was like he was waiting for her to accept how he felt before he said them again. But he tried to show her everyday.

"Sarah gave it to us. She doesn't want it, but she doesn't want too part with it".

Andy sucked in a light breath at Sam saying it was given to 'Them'.

"And I don't want to be here without you, but I don't expect an answer now, and I don't expect you to give everything up, including your apartment too move here".

Andy was still wrapped up in silence, something that Sam had only experienced a few times.

He watched as Andy sat searching his face for answers, her lip finding it's resting place between her teeth.

"Sam..."

Here it came; the NO he was silently dreading.

Andy stood up off the swing after unfolding her legs out from under herself and took a few steps away when she suddenly stopped and faced him.

"You want ME to move in here with you, to live here? Like a normal couple?".

If the conversation wasn't so serious, Sam would have found Andy rather animated right now.

"Yes Andy. I want to pack up all our belongings and move them here. I want to wake up here with you every single morning and go to bed every night knowing that you're going to steal my share of blankets. I want us to call this home, I want your clothes back in the closet next to mine, and I want to share the bathroom with you when you sing in the shower".

Andy's mouth dropped open into the shape of a small O as she gaped at him like he was speaking a foreign language.

"What about your house?".

"I'll sell it".

"No Sam, you've had your house for years, it's paid for. Why would you even do that?".

Andy didn't want him to do that, give up something that he had worked so hard for and looked after, for...this.

"I'd give it up in a heartbeat Andy, if it meant I could be here with you every day".

Wow, that seemed to steal her breath away.

"Sam I couldn't ask you to do that".

"You're not, I'm offering too do it. I want you more than a house. If you don't want to stay here then come live with me, or make space in your closet and I'll move in there. This...gap between us isn't enough Andy, I want all of it; all of you, all the time".

Sam had stood up and found his hand stretched out for Andy to take, her gaze looking between his face and his hand.

"It doesn't matter where we are, or where we live- I just want to do it with you". He really didn't have anything to say after that.

Sam knew that it was a lot for her to take in; being here, him wanting to live here with her- but it was the first thing that sprang to mind the day that Sarah gave him the deed to the property and told him that he could never sell it, and that it had to be kept in the family. She also added that if he or she never had kids that it should be passed on to Lars one day.

"Sam...". Andy didn't quite finish her sentence, she rushed at him and smothered him with kisses.

Sam pulled back a step, just to look at her, his face asking the question he wanted the answer to the most.

When Andy blushed and looked away, Sam asked the question in words, her evasive answer doing little to quell his nerves.

"Is that a yes? Or a maybe? A no?".

Andy giggled at the lack of his strong, calm side as he revealed his nervousness unhinged.

"Yes Sam. Here, your house, my apartment. I don't really care".

Sam felt his heartbeat return after it shut down when he thought the no was coming. His breathing also felt like it had resumed functioning, the lack of air causing the squeeze in his chest to tighten while he waited for affirmation of her answer.

"Here?".

Andy nodded. She really didn't care, it could be a tent in the middle of nowhere, she would be happy no matter where they where as long as they were doing this together.

Andy's mood shifted after that moment, she was lighthearted and carefree and let her anger slip away.

Sam dragged her by the hand through the house and pointed out the changes that he had made and asked her what she wanted too put where when they brought their own stuff up.

Andy was watching Sam making plans like he owned the world in that moment. He really wasn't the planning kind of guy, he just went with the program.

Sam had donated most of the furniture that was in the house too local charities, there really wasn't a need to hang on to all of it, but he had kept the bed that had been in 'their' room.

Tonight he was thankful for making plans for a change, and thinking ahead instead of flying by his pants like he usually did.

If he didn't think ahead, they'd be sleeping on the floor.

Andy smiled when she saw that the bed was still there, and made up with fresh linen that smelt like lavender and spring.

Sam went to make sure that everything was locked up and turned off while Andy slipped into her pajamas.

The time and space his absence gave her left her thinking.

It gave her butterflies as she allowed memories of their time here in the past. But they were memories that made her smile and her heart skip a beat.

Sam found Andy curled up in bed, the bedside lamp on his side still on waiting for his return.

Sam shed his excess clothes and climbed into bed, Andy wearing a subtle smile as she eyed him.

"Change your mind?". Sam asked giving her the option of backing out.

"Nope I'm... I'm just really happy you know. It's like everything makes sense now and it was all worth it; even though at the time I wanted to hate you and being here was like punishment".

Andy sat up in bed and had her hand flying around as she gestured wildly between them.

"It's like this is how it was meant to turn out, how it was supposed too end and I am so sorry that I didn't see it sooner".

Sam lay with his head propped up on his hands while she ambled her words out at a hundred miles a minute.

"It just...I'm making the right decision Sam, I want to do this and you know I love you, so this is the next step and I'm scared I'm still going to screw it up, but it's worth it".

Sam was rendered completely stunned by Andy's rant as she just kept it coming.

He was paying attention to what she was saying, because that's what he did- he listened, but three little words tumbled out of her mouth and it didn't seem like she even realized that she had said them.

"What?". Andy asked seeing Sam's expression change to one she hadn't ever seen before.

"Do you mean that?". Sam sat up and let his tongue run over the inside of his teeth as he waited with bated breath for her to answer.

"Yeah, I mean it is the next step right?".

Sam felt a little happiness slip away when he gathered that she had said those three little words without intending too.

Andy reran her little rant through her mind, right up until where she said 'you know I love you'. There everything froze up as her gaze snapped to meet Sam's whose was looking lost somewhere between devastated and in denial.

"Sam...". Wow that came out sounding so fickle.

"It's okay". Sam really didn't know what to say to that.

"No Sam it's not. I've...I've never said it too you and I didn't want it to come out like that".

This time it was Sam's turn to gawk at Andy, not quite getting what she was trying to say.

"Arg". Andy grumbled as she flopped down, her head hitting the pillow with a poof.

Sam got comfy and lay back down, his one hand propping his head up as he turned on his side to face Andy who had her eyes closed.

"I totally screwed the moment up". Andy let the words slip out under her breath.

"Nope, it was totally you".

"It's not funny Sam, I meant to say it...just not like that".

This was new; she was admitting that there was a little more there than 'feelings'.

Sam waited for her to continue, his smirk held back from breaking into a fully fledged grin.

But she kept him waiting, knowing that he was.

But it didn't feel right to say it again and try cover up how it came out. Besides she thought he knew it.

"Night Sam". Andy whispered giving him a quick peck on the cheek before rolling over and moving closer.

Sam gave her a kiss against her hair after turning his lamp off and moved closer to wrap her up in his arm's.

In a way he was happy that she couldn't see the smile that invaded his face, it would mean more questions and he was happy too live in the moment.

*******Thanks for reading!**

**Seems like Andy made a major boo-boo!**

**Let me know what you think with another awesome review. **

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	27. Giving In

**You guys have been totally awesome during this ride & all others in fact! So thank you!**

**Thanks to the regulars & kelly2727 & welcome to the newbies. **

_**A really big thank you to whoever nominated this fic for the following categories in the Rookie Blue Choice Awards 2013;**_

_***Best overall fic**_

_***Best new overall fic**_

_***Best Romance**_

_***Best Alternative Universe**_

_***Most Beloved fic**_

_***Best Interpretation of Sarah Swarek**_

_**And for all the other nominations that popped up, I'm trully stunned & in awe, so thank you!**_

**Well done to all the nominees & good luck! Keep up the awesome work!**

**This is the second last chapter sadly, an epilogue will follow shotly... Unless you guys want more? Let me know when you're done reading if you want more & I'll add some on. **

**Chapter 27- Giving In. **

Andy woke up the next morning because Sam was making enough noise to wake the neighborhood, a constant banging echoing loudly through the open doorway followed by what sounded like a sanding machine.

Giving up on sleeping anymore Andy padded upstairs in search of Sam and found him in the kitchen taking shelves out of the cupboards and setting them down on the floor.

Watching him work was always just a hint at what heaven would be like one day.

"Want breakfast?".

It amazed her that he knew when she was there, without even seeing her; he knew.

"Yeah sure, I'll make..."

"Nope, I've got it". Sam said setting the next shelf down on the floor next too the others and making his way over too her.

Andy just nodded as Sam gave her a good morning kiss. She really wasn't about to argue- his food was way better than hers.

They spent the day working in the house, or rather Sam doing odds and ends and Andy watching and keeping him company.

When they were quiet she would allow her mind too sneak away and loose itself in secret thoughts as she let herself see that this was how life would be.

The rest of her life would be like this: calm and content. Or could be at least.

And it didn't scare her, it didn't make her want too run, it made her want to grab it with both hands and hold on as tightly as she could.

Sam made them dinner before getting them each a beer and dragging Andy out too the swing again, nightfall settling down around them as the weather cooled down just enough to feel good. The recent heat had been excruciating.

Sitting down on the swing Andy watched Sam for a while, his faraway look making her feel envious that he could so easily escape.

"You okay?". Sam asked after a while, Andy still focused solely on him.

"Totally" Andy sighed it out, a light blush creeping out over her skin.

"If you've changed your mind...". Sam couldn't believe that he was saying it again- but after their rocky start and her constant hesitation, he needed reassurance.

"No. Never, I'm just really happy right now".

Sam saw her face turn too pure bliss as she said that, she really was one hundred percent happy right now as she leaned into him letting her head settle on his shoulder.

"I just love being here like this, with you".

Sam felt his smile invade his lips as he looked down at her to find her looking up at him.

Sam gave her a nudge so she moved forwards enough too let him wrap an arm around her shoulder as she snuggled a bit closer.

"You sure you want..."

Andy let out a frustrated sigh. Didn't he get it?

Sitting up Andy pulled away looking at Sam and seeing a reflection of herself.

She saw the hesitation that she had felt, and the reluctance that had caused her too try and stay away before.

But she saw what had always been there too- the way he looked at her like no-one ever had.

"Sam, I want too be here. I want too live here with you, I want this, us. I know I was so dense before but... It's not there anymore, all the doubts, the fears, the hesitation, you scared them away".

Andy's analogy of that made him let out a chuckle, she really had a way with words.

After a while Andy let out a yawn and Sam nudged her again hinting that she should get up off the swing.

They'd been sitting out here for hours and hours after sunset just content too be.

Sam locked up the house while Andy grabbed a shower and headed straight too bed knowing that he would follow once he had been through the shower too.

And she was right, after his shower he was there, stealing her attention from some TV show that didn't really captivate her attention for very long.

They had spent the day doing normal things and it had made Andy think a little deeper than she had really ever gone.

She had found herself doing the same thing while she waited for Sam too get out of the shower- think.

But she wasn't overthinking things, she was thinking them through.

And she liked what she saw, she loved how she felt, and she adored where they were going.

This was what she wanted, how she wanted things too be.

Now she only had too let Sam know that.

When he climbed into bed, Andy held out the remote for the TV but he shook his head telling her that whatever she was watching was okay with him.

She was sitting on top of the covers with her legs crossed, it was hot and humid and just not really weather for getting under the covers.

Sam eyed her noticing the faraway look she had on her face, the one that was accompanied with a smile.

He sat down beside her, his legs stretched out in front of him as he got comfortable against the stack of pillows behind his head.

They sat in a comfortable quiet for a while, watching TV but watching each other too.

During the TV show Andy had sprawled out next too him, her head resting propped up on her hand as she suddenly turned too face him.

"Something on your mind?" Sam asked sensing that she had something too say by the way her mouth kept opening and closing.

"Nope" came out with a giant smile.

"Okay".

"But I wanna tell you something".

Same thing Sam's mind chuckled as Andy sat up and slid down the bed too sit across from him with her legs crossed again.

"You're sure that you want too move here with me?".

Sam nodded to her question, his attention focused on her as he sat up.

But her mood was conflicting, there were no signs of the confused Andy, or scared Andy, or any other Andy than the self-assured one that sat looking at him now.

"I want that too, and I'm sorry about what I said last night, I didn't mean for it too come out like that. But I'm not taking it back, I want too say it, I want you too know how I feel. Before I said that I think I love you too, but I do, I really, really do love you, and I feel like an idiot for not saying it before. It's been there for a while and I know I tried too hide it, and refused too believe it could be more, but this... This is just... I love you Sam".

Sam would swear that he stopped breathing in that moment, that the world had stopped moving.

Nothing had ever come close to what he felt hearing her say that, nothing would ever compare.

Andy looked like she was about to explode, she was wearing a look that Sam had only ever seen when she was asleep. It was the first time that he had ever seen her wearing it while she was awake.

Sam reached out for her pulling her close enough to sit sideways in his lap.

She let out a ridiculously loud giggle as she moved too sit in his lap, she wasn't used too being this close, and had only ever sat in his lap once.

"So then give in".

That made absolutely no sense too her whatsoever, give in too what?

Sam had a hand lost in her hair, the other reaching out too take her left hand by hooking his pinkie finger through hers, his hand still closed.

Andy looked down to find his hand still closed, a curious look cast between him and his hand and back again.

Opening his hand Sam waited for her reaction, the silence only broken by the tiniest gasp as it left her lips.

Resting in the palm of his hand was a diamond ring, so dainty that Andy thought it would crumble when his fingers released their pressure holding on too it.

He's made up his mind in the shower to just come out here and ask her straight out. He had the whole big speech planned, but it didn't feel right- it didn't feel like them.

This was what he wanted, and no amount of time spent waiting would ever change his mind.

He had been watching her throughout the day and had seen more than one emotion cross her face, but all signs of any hindering emotion were gone.

So he kept the ring on his pinkie and got into bed waiting for the right moment- and she gave it too him.

Without even knowing what it would lead too; her three little words.

Hearing her say those words told him that she was ready, that she had accepted how he felt but acknowledged how she felt too.

And nothing would ever compare too hearing her say those words for the first time- well except maybe a yes.

Andy stayed frozen, her eyes cast down too Sam's hand as she looked at what he was holding.

Shifting around seemed too break the spell making Andy looking up at him, her finger still hooked between his.

"What?".

Sam resisted the urge to laugh at her expression, she seemed so shocked that every ounce of thought had escaped her.

"Give in, marry me and just... Let me hear you say that everyday for as long as you're able too talk?".

Andy's eyes widened at his use of the M word, but he wasn't backing down.

"Andy, since day one this moment is all I've wanted, I love you and it's never going away. I just... want...just us, no matter what".

Andy had yet too move an inch, Sam was sure that her heart had stopped and that she wasn't breathing anymore, but he'd wait until it made sense, until she was able too respond.

"Sam?".

She suddenly started blinking really fast, her eyes misting over with the telltale signs of tears.

But Sam didn't let go of her finger, or her hair, he just kept holding on waiting.

"I don't just want too live with you Andy, I want...".

Sam stopped talking when Andy looked back down at his hand, her other hand moving to cover his; palm too palm, the gold band hidden between their hands.

Seconds later Andy looked back up at Sam wearing a shy smile.

"Me?".

Sam felt his face crack up into a lopsided grin of his own at her question, she was having trouble wrapping her mind around the fact that he wanted her- permanently.

"Only you".

Sam tilted their hands upside down so that his was above her's before he lifted his hand up and left the ring nestled squarely in the middle of her palm.

"Me". This time it came out in confirmation rather than question.

Sam had been carrying the ring everywhere with him for the last week, waiting for the right moment but now- now he was so glad that even though there were a few times that he wanted too take it out, he hadn't.

This was just how he wanted it, up close and personal.

Andy's fingers closed slowly, her hand holding onto the ring as she looked at Sam with such adoration that he felt like he was about too melt.

"Sam...".

Here it came, her answer.

The next thing out of her mouth would be the most important thing that anyone would ever say too him.

And he was hoping that it wouldn't be a no with everything he had in him.

"I love you, I really do, but this... This is forever. I will only do this once, ever. No divorce, no separation. It's a ..."

Sam saw her battle to get her words out in a legible order. Her commitment issues resurfacing momentarily as they flashed across her face.

Holding his finger up, he let her war with words die down before he spoke.

"Swarek's only ever love once. I want the forever, with you. No divorce, no separation, and this Swarek loves a McNally".

Andy blushed at his words, he just knew how too make the color spread across her face.

As her hand clenched over the cold band, a million images flashed through her mind starting with images from when they first met, and ending with how she had seen him today.

There really was only one answer.

Andy nodded slightly, her head tilting too the side as her hair fluttered slightly over her face.

"Yes?". Sam asked holding his breath.

"Yes" Andy let the word come out over her lips instantaneously, without pause, Sam pulling her even closer as he sealed their promises with a passionate kiss.

******Thanks for reading!**

**Let me know who's still here for the second too last time in an awesome review!**

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	28. Saving Souls

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**Thank you to kelly2727 & the regulars, welcome to the newbies!**

**Okay so it looks like I'll be extending Lie because you all wanted more, so here goes;**

**Chapter 28- Saving Souls. **

Sunday morning breakfast smells drifted throughout the house as Sam felt himself stir.

He could smell bacon, toast and coffee as his stomach jumped around with hunger as his eyes opened to find Andy missing.

Getting out of bed Sam followed his nose to find Andy rustling up food in the kitchen. She stopped momentarily and looked at her left hand, the diamonds sparkling in the sunlight as they caught the early morning sun rays through the window.

He could see a shy smile invade her lips as she let herself get lost in looking at the tiny band as it sparkled.

"You can stop staring" she said as she turned to face him, her smile turning to embarrassed at knowing that she had been caught staring at her ring.

"Never gonna happen McNally". Sam said as he moved into the kitchen.

After breakfast Sam grabbed a shower and was tugging on clean clothes when his phone rang, Sarah's name lighting up the screen.

"Heya" Sam answered.

Andy watched as Sam's face fell, a furrowing expression creasing his eyebrows and forehead as one hand swept out to run over his face as he listened to what she was saying.

"Okay... Yes Sar... I've got it". Sam blurted out sounding really frustrated.

Andy surmised that Sarah had hung up when Sam pulled the phone away from his ear and stared at it.

"She okay?".

"She's fine. Pissed off, but okay. Lars got arrested and she can't get too him so we have to go. I am so sorry". Sam really wasn't thrilled about cutting their weekend short, but Lars needed bailing out and right now that was a priority because he wasn't hard enough to spend time locked up with real criminals.

"Sam it's okay, he needs you now".

Andy grabbed a quick shower while Sam grabbed their belongings and put them in the truck when he was done packing their bags.

When she came out of the house she could tell that he was worried about the kid, and that it was going to be a long day with grumpy Sam.

Twenty minutes later, their new house was locked up securely as Sam pulled out onto the gravel that led to the road.

He stopped and looked at Andy seeking out an answer as too where she wanted to go before she nodded and smiled.

Of course she was going with him, why did he even ask.

Three hours later Sam pulled up outside a police prescient far from their own, Andy jumping out as soon as he did.

That was the only reason that Sarah wasn't here herself, it was almost six hours drive either way for her and Sam was closer.

Entering the division, Sam was followed closely by Andy as he sought out an officer that could find Lars for him and explain what kind of trouble the kid had gotten himself into.

Finding the front desk, Sam felt Andy's hand wrap around his, a stupid smile tugging at his lips as he felt her ring press into the flesh between his fingers for the fist time, but it felt so good that he wasn't complaining.

"Hi I'm looking for a Lars Holloway". Sam said as soon as he gained the uniformed officer behind the desk's attention.

"And you are?". The face asked barely interested in listening or responding.

"Detective Swarek, um... Guns and Gangs?". And he so knew that saying that was about too cripple his future with Andy, but it was his best shot at getting too Lars.

Sam felt Andy's hand tense up before she dropped his and let go as his words stung.

He'd been at Fifteen since he was done with Damian's case and had received an offer from Guns and Gangs that he couldn't refuse.

He just hadn't told Andy about it yet.

"Yes Sir". The uniform behind the front desk jumped up before barreling away.

"Sam...". Andy hissed in his ear, his eyes staying focused on the shiny counter top of the front desk. He was in such deep crap right now that he just couldn't face her.

"It's not what you think" he whispered when he felt her finger jab him in the side in a bid too gain his undivided attention.

"Seriously? It's Guns and Gangs Sam".

"Can we not do this right now? I was going to tell you". Sam said under his breath as he leaned towards Andy and spotted two bodies coming back with the uniform that had been behind the desk.

"Detective". A middle aged man greeted as he held his hand out to be shaken when he drew abreast of Sam and Andy. "What can we do for you?".

"Lars Holloway". Sam said dryly as he watched the older man eye Andy. She would unknowingly draw the attention of a male of any age in her vicinity without even knowing it.

"Why, what's he too you?".

Sam weighed up his plausible answers before settling with the easiest seeing as this division wasn't all that friendly.

"A witness". It wasn't a lie- Lars was a witness, he had just been excluded up until now.

The other man accompanying the one doing all the talking had to hold his laugh back, obviously this guy didn't get spoken too that bluntly, that often.

"Okay, follow me".

They were led by the two men to a viewing room where they stepped inside and found Lars being drilled relentlessly on the other side of the glass, a large duffle bag on the table next too his hands.

"He came in wanting too hand himself over, a bag full of cash and no explanation as to where he got it from. He gave us the name and number of a Sarah Swarek?".

Sam did his best to hide his surprise at hearing that Sarah had been in contact with Lars after they were back home, she had too have been if he knew her real name and telephone number.

"He did what?" Andy mumbled out looking at Lars looking tired and worn as he sat down slumped in his chair.

"This was when?" Sam chipped in.

"This morning".

"Can I see him?" Andy suddenly blurted out, before looking at Sam imploring him to give his permission.

Sam nodded and so did the cop who seemed to let his guard slip and his friendly side show.

Andy made her way to the door of the interrogation room, Sam staying rooted to his spot behind the glass as he watched the cop in the interrogation room stepping out and Andy stepping in.

The look on Lars' face was priceless when he looked up and saw Andy smiling from the doorway.

"Ma'am".

The kid still had good manners.

Andy sat down across from him, his face lit up like a neon sign when he looked at her.

"Lars what are you doing?".

Sam's hand reached out and hit the speaker on the wall so that they could hear the conversation.

"Ma'am, I'm making things right. I can't use this money, so I'm returning it. I've got a job, and put every nickel we've used back, it's just not right too keep it".

Andy looked up at the glass knowing that Sam was listening.

Andy made small talk with Lars while she waited for Sam to come and get her, because ultimately he would.

They spoke about how good his life was now and how he looked after his girl who's name Andy discovered was Abigail, and her daughter Alicia.

Soon enough there was a knock on the door and it creaked open to reveal Sam who smiled at Lars who in turn hung his head.

Andy stepped out of the room and joined Sam in the hallway as he hovered nervously.

"What?".

"Um...can I ask you something?" Sam looked really nervous now, like he was about too crawl into a hole to escape.

Andy giggled a little, it wasn't the side of Sam that she was used to seeing.

"Can we um, take Lars home?".

That left Andy's mouth hanging open.

And it showed, Sam stifling a chuckle as he took in her expression.

"Um?".

"I kind of went ahead and said it was okay because they need someone to take responsibility and I know I've dropped a lot on you today...but he needs this".

It took Andy a long time for his words to register, the unbridled caring side of Sam on full display for her to see in a moment so free that it made Andy feel like she was melting on the inside.

Andy raised her hand up slowly and let it rest against Sam's chest, her fingers curling downwards slightly as she looked up at him.

"How did you get to be such a good guy?"

Sam had a hand slithering up her free arm until it rested on Andy's shoulder where he let his fingers give her a gentle squeeze.

"I wasn't always this way, guess it was you".

Andy let out a ridiculously loud laugh at one of Sam's corny quirks. He didn't dish them out freely, but when they were there they were just absolutely corny and beyond.

"So is that my second yes in less than twenty-four hours?".

Andy nodded, she really couldn't say no when it felt so right to do this.

After an hour of dealing with the ADA and convincing her that there were no grounds to hold Lars on they were finally allowed to leave, taking Lars with them.

Lars still had his head hanging and avoided Sam's gaze- until they got to Sam's truck.

Sam opened the door for Andy and let her get in, motioning too Lars that he should hang on a moment before climbing in the back.

As soon as Andy's door was closed Sam let a fully fledged dimpled grin show as he eyed Lars and held out his hand.

"Sarah is going to kill you, but you did the right thing, I'm proud of you kid".

Andy barely heard what Sam was saying, the truck blocking out most audio.

Lars lifted his head and grinned back before snaking his hand out to shake Sam's "Thank you Sir".

As soon as they got into the truck Andy turned around in her seat to face Lars when a sudden thought made her remember that there were two people missing.

"Lars, where are Alicia and Abigail?".

"They're at our apartment Ma'am, she understands".

Andy turned back to Sam before facing the front window, her heart breaking because the Lars was going through something similar to what Sarah had- they just couldn't be with the one they wanted to be beside.

Sam pulled out of his parking and drove for a few blocks before pulling over and cutting the engine despite confused looks from both his passengers.

Eyeing Lars in the rear view mirror Sam eventually spoke "Still got the pickup?".

"Yes Sir".

"You have until tomorrow morning ten am to get to my house, if you are late all bets are off, don't screw this up".

Andy stared at Sam in disbelief, he was giving Lars the option of going home to say goodbye or going home to get his girls.

He had obviously been remanded to Sam's custody for a while, so Sam was making compromises where he could to help out.

Sam drove by the directions that Lars gave him and stopped outside a nice looking building where a face peered out of the window. As soon as Lars was out of the truck, the face disappeared and the curtains shifted.

Within second the front door of the building opened and a woman came running out, a child nestled to her chest tightly.

Andy watched the bittersweet moment as Abigail got Lars back.

The drive home was made in silence, Andy running over the days events; back and forth in her mind one section of the day spoiling the rest. All it took was three words- Guns and Gangs.

Andy's run instincts didn't kick in, but her overthinking ones had.

Sam kept glancing sideways at Andy, her face a blank, void of all expressions as her mind consumed itself in deep thought.

"I'm sorry" Sam said when he stopped at a red light a few blocks from his house. He didn't even ask Andy where she wanted to go, just drove on autopilot to his house.

"You could have told me Sam, this changes things".

"I know, it just didn't feel like the timing was right. But it's not... What do you mean this changes things?".

It took him a few seconds for his brain to catch up with her words, the honking of a car horn behind them making him pull away when he noticed that the light had turned green.

"Sam, Guns and Gangs is undercover work, you'll never be home, I'll...". Sam suddenly swerving into a parking made Andy's mouth close as he pulled to a stop, put the truck in park and turned to face her.

"No. No undercover, no going away. I'm running the UC's from an office. I create fake cover stories, and fake identities, I use resources to get them in. That's it".

Andy's eyes fluttered into bigger orbs as she kept her gaze focused on Sam.

"You..."

"I love the streets and I love working with everyone at Fifteen, but this- we need this. It's a new start, and it's safer. It's me promising you that I'll be home every night".

Wow.

Andy was stunned, shocked, and speechless.

Sam was trading the risks for something safer, trading harm for guarantees.

Andy lunged forward with every intention of giving Sam a kiss, only problem was her seatbelt as it snapped into lock and pulled her back when she went forwards.

"Trying to jump me again?" Sam chuckled out wearing a smirk.

"Not funny" Andy grumbled. Stupid seatbelt stopped her from apologizing in her own way.

Sam let his hand run over her cheek, his way of making sure that she was really still here even though it looked like she was showing no signs of wanting too run.

She was mad earlier, but not mad enough to shut him out.

"Can we stop at my dads quick?".

Sam nodded and pulled out into traffic again, this time turning towards Tommy's house.

Before his involvement with Andy, Sam had met and worked with Tommy McNally a few times in the past; way back when his rookie probation was just done.

The guy was a good cop, a natural detective, and a person with a big heart. It wasn't hard to see where Andy got her lions heart or her passion from. It was definitely a McNally trait.

Sam thought over the first time that Andy took him home to meet her dad officially. He had heard her telling Tommy that she was bringing someone home with her, but she never said his name. When they had pulled up outside Tommy's house and Tommy came out, Sam's name was growled out in greeting.

So his appearance was unexpected and Tommy also didn't seem too thrilled probably because Sam hadn't been one of the easiest partners Tommy had ever had, although their pairings together had been rather brief. Or maybe it was because Sam was one of the cops that had tried too help Tommy stay sober.

When Sam pulled up outside Tommy's house today, Andy's hand found his as they approached the front door, her tight squeeze giving away her anxious feelings about telling Tommy that she had a new piece of jewelry.

Sam was surprised that Andy hadn't told anyone yet, she hadn't called Traci or her dad. He didn't even have the chance to tell Sarah when she had called earlier either. Now; because she had asked to stop here on the way home Sam knew that she wanted to tell everyone in person rather than on the phone.

When Tommy opened the door, he greeted them both warmly, smiles all round as they moved inside.

Tommy let them in before giving Andy her customary hug hello, it was something new that they had only started doing after she came back from her weeks away.

When Andy pulled away, Tommy reached out for her left hand before smiling as he held it up and looked down at it. "Looks good on you kiddo" his voice emanating with pride.

"You knew?"

Tommy nodded as he looked at her, looking rather sheepish before looking over her shoulder to where Sam was standing.

"I might have been asked permission" Tommy said chuckling as Sam tried to hide his smile.

Sam was old school, and tried to do this the right way so before they left on friday he had stopped to see Tommy to ask his permission. He had stressed the point that it would not necessarily happen this weekend, but who had he been kidding? Of course he wouldn't be able to wait, the ring had been itching to leave his possession since he paid for it.

Andy turned to face Sam, a wide eyed, open mouth looking at him. She knew that with certain things he was sort of set in his ways; but this? The proposal had been unexpected, and definitely not planned out the way it had happened, but she never thought that Sam would actually have gone to ask her dad. But she didn't mind.

Tommy congratulated Sam for getting a yes with a handshake that morphed into a man-hug, Andy giggling as she saw Sam's exasperated expression. The touchy-feely had blind-sided him, but after snapping out of it Sam returned the hug.

They stayed a while longer before leaving, declining Tommy's invitation to stay for dinner as it was getting late, and they'd had a long day.

Making their way to Sam's house Andy kept quiet, a content look crossing her face even though she was tired after a rough day. Definitely a look Sam could get used to seeing on her.

Sam unlocked the front door and let Andy go in while he went to get their bags and she called for takeout.

When he entered the house he could see Andy lost in thought as she looked around the lounge, the phone tucked to her chin.

"So Lars will be here for a while? Think he'll bring Alicia and Abigail with him?".

Sam nodded, Lars had asked his permission too, and Sam had agreed. After taking on the responsibility of looking after them, Lars wasn't about to give it up now so he had agreed.

"And then what? What happens when we move Sam?".

Andy the ever planner was worrying about things that were still far off in the distance.

"I have no idea". He hadn't thought that far.

Grabbing them each a beer from the fridge, Sam padded back across the lounge and held Andy's open one out for her.

"The ADA let us take Lars because even though Damian confessed there is still a chance that he could appeal the sentence".

"Think he will?".

Sam shook his head, he really didn't think Damian would for one reason- Sarah.

He wouldn't want to put Sarah through the punishment of reliving it, so he'd let it go and accept his punishment for a life lived on the wrong side of the law.

"She also hinted that Lars can still be charged as an accessory unless..."

Andy's eyebrows lifted when Sam kept quiet. He had been dropping bombshells on her all day and knew that he was about to repeat the motion again.

"Unless he goes to the academy when they take recruits in a few weeks". Sam smiled sheepishly. He had leveled the playing field with that offer; and the ADA said that she would only let Lars go if he signed a written agreement that accepted being signed over to Sam's recognizance, and that he does a minimum of five years including academy training; with the TPD as Sam suggested.

"You're sending him to the academy?".

Andy's respones came out all squeeky.

Sam didn't nod, or respond before Andy let out a laugh so lighthearted, it sounded like it had wings.

"What?".

"The universe" Andy giggled relentlessly.

Sam still wasn't getting it.

"It all fits, don't you see? Lars and Abigail can stay in my apartment, and we stay here until the house is done".

Sam had mentioned a few things that he wanted done before they moved to the new house; namely fencing and an alarm system. He wanted to redo the floors and break through walls in the bedroom upstairs. The downstairs bedroom had to get a window.

Sam's eyebrows shifted up almost into his hairline- Andy had spent the day thinking this through.

"Andy, you don't have to do that".

"But... What if I said I want to do it?".

That made Sam the happiest man walking the face of the earth.

******Thanks for reading, let me know what you think now that Lars is back & following in Sam & Andy's & Sarah's footsteps!**

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	29. The Little Things

**As always- without you guys; it would be pointless writing anything so thank you! **

**Thank you to the regulars & kelly2727! & welcome to the newbies!**

**Thanks again to whoever nominated my fics on for the Rookie Choice Awards 2013, I am really honored!**

**Chapter 29- The Little Things. **

It was still dark the next morning when Sam heard movement downstairs inside the house. It wasn't the creepy quiet movements of an intruder, it was the sounds of someone making themselves at home.

Sarah was here, she'd probably used her spare key to get in and was waiting for news on Lars.

Sam slid out of bed, leaving Andy to sleep as he pulled the bedroom door closed behind him and slipped downstairs.

"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you" Sarah said sipping on coffee as Sam made it into the kitchen.

"You didn't" He replied as he poured himself a cup. She should know by now that he didn't sleep a lot.

Sam saw the time at five-thirty and arched an eyebrow in his sisters direction.

He had called her last night and told her that Lars was okay, and out of police custody- instead remanded to his and that he would be down here in the morning. She obviously couldn't wait to see for herself that he was okay, so here she was.

Sam had not told Sarah that he had made a deal with the ADA and that Lars was going to be starting at the academy, he left that up to the kid but judging by Sarah's worried face- they hadn't spoken about it yet.

"What time is he supposed to be here?".

"Sarah, it's early. I told him by nine, but they've got the kid to think about".

"They're all coming?". That seemed to surprise Sarah.

"Yup, couldn't make him give up on them could I". It was stated, a simple fact.

"You're going soft Sammy" Sarah giggled to which Sam growled.

"How's Andy?".

That made Sam smile. They had yet to tell Sarah, but figured it was time for some payback "Ask her when she gets up".

"Crap, sorry. I didn't know she was here".

Sarah knew that Andy still had her own condo and that sleeping arrangements were split between the two homes, she just didn't think that far down the line before letting herself in with her spare keys.

"And that is something you should get used too" Sam said pouring Andy a cup of coffee and leaving Sarah in the kitchen with her mouth open because he didn't reply to her questioning look.

Sam set Andy's coffee down and peppered kisses all over her face to wake her up. She had a shift this morning so he needed to run her to the barn and then come back home and start sorting it out for Lars.

Andy smiled, but kept her eyes closed, she really did like waking up like this in the mornings.

"Sarah's here" Sam said as he gave her one last good morning kiss before leaving her to get up.

Andy drank her coffee and jumped in the shower before heading downstairs.

Sam was making breakfast while Sarah sat at the kitchen island watching him.

"Andy" Sarah said jumping up when Andy came into view. Sarah gave her a giant hug, it had been weeks since she had last seen Sam and Andy.

Sarah stepped out of Andy's embrace, her eyes going from Andy to Sam and the back again.

She reached out and tugged Andy's hand up her eyes roaming over the delicate ring as she let out a shrilled giggle and hugged Andy again.

When she pulled away, she let go of Andy and bounded over to Sam. She slapped him on the back of the head leaving Sam to still stand smiling at her. "Why didn't you tell me?".

"We were kind of busy, and I think Andy wanted to tell you in person" Sam said folding his arms across his chest.

"Wow". Sarah said looking between them again.

"You actually grew a pair, but she said yes".

Sarah knew that Andy had serious reservations when it came to letting Sam in, but she had been witness to Andy's defense slipping over recent months.

Sarah moved back to Andy before giving her another hug and whispering a soft "Welcome to the family" in her ear.

Sam took Andy to the barn and walked her in.

Sarah was at home so there was someone there if Lars arrived.

He had really wanted to stay with Andy this morning because someone was bound to notice her ring and then she would be facing it alone, so he decided to stay until after parade and then leave.

He still needed to clear his move to Guns and Gangs with Frank, but that could wait until tomorrow.

"How was your weekend?" Traci asked Andy as she opened her locker.

"It was good" Andy said trying to hide her blush as she stuck her head in behind her open locker door.

"Andy?".

"Yup?" Andy's head reappeared from behind the obstructing metal door when Traci celled her name.

"What aren't you telling me?".

"Nothing" Andy loved teasing Traci. She was such a willing participant that just could refrain from doing it.

"Andy!".

"Really, it's nothing". Andy just couldn't keep the smile locked away.

"Oh wow" Traci said as she looked over at Andy once her head reappeared for the third time.

"He asked you didn't he?".

"You knew?".

"No, but I can see it all over your face".

Traci stepped closer and Andy held out her hand showing Traci her ring. Traci was smart, but she had an inconceivable way of reading between the lines too. Andy had told her that she thought she would make a great detective, but Traci was always doubting herself.

"It's beautiful, so you" Traci exclaimed when she saw the ring.

"Got a few?" Sam asked when he saw Jerry coming down the hall while he waited for Andy to get changed into her uniform.

"For you always Buddy".

"Still planning on asking Nash to move in?" Sam cut straight to the point, Jerry smiling as he got a far away look. He always did that when it came to Nash.

Jerry was divorced, Sam having stood by and watched that marriage crumble and Jerry fall apart until he hit rock bottom.

But since Nash's arrival Jerry had changed. He'd become the old Jerry, the one that smile everyday.

Jerry had mentioned that he was thinking about asking Nash to move in last week, so when Sam saw him come down the hallway his mind came up with a solution.

"Yeah, I think I am"

Sam had been to Nash's and it was a small two bedroom. Jerry's was a little bigger, but still a two bedroom.

Nash's mother stayed with her, so they would need a three bedroom at least, and that was where Sam came into play.

"Want to rent my house?".

Jerry was looking at him funny, like he had just said the most unexpected thing ever.

"Why where are you going?"

"Um... McNally and I are moving, I wanted to sell but she doesn't like the idea. I've got three bedrooms".

Jerry slapped Sam on the back and congratulated him for upping his game. "Just moving?".

Sam shrugged, he wanted to tell Jerry but figured that his face would be worth waiting for the announcement, because there was bound to be one.

"Yuuup".

"Sammy, I dunno if she's even willing to take that step right now. Don't hold it up if you're in a hurry".

"That's the thing, it won't be that soon".

Jerry's face showed his confusion, Sammy and McNally were moving; assuming together, but they weren't in a hurry?

"I've got some renovations to do, and a couple things to sort out so a month, or three?".

"You're gonna wait for three months to move in with McNally?" Jerry had a lot of humor gracing his features right now.

"Something like that" Sam said before leaving Jerry in the hallway to ponder his offer.

Parade started and Sam tried hard to keep his face neutral while he waited for the end of parade and undoubtedly 'The announcement', because it would come.

Or not.

Frank wrapped up parade and dismissed the room, Sam letting his hand find Andy's as she walked out of the room and brushed her hand against his.

The absence of the cold metal between his fingers had him worried as his sturdy stride faltered.

Andy knew that he was going into what she called 'Andy Mode'.

Yup, he totally had moments where he became the unsure Andy she once was.

How he had endured all these months with her like that- she would never understand.

Pulling Sam down the hall Andy stopped when they reached a quiet corner.

She spun to face him and launched herself right into it "I asked Frank not to announce it, it's kind of not us. If I was engaged to someone else it would have been okay to announce at parade, but I didn't want that. And for the record, I'm wearing my ring, right here...". Andy said patting her chest with her free hand. "I just don't want to break it, loose it or have something happen to it".

She let out a long breath, Sam's eyebrow arching up as he let a smirk slip into play.

"It's insured".

That made Andy's face fall.

Expensive things got insured.

"Sam..."

"Hey, we both said that we were only doing this once right?"

She really had no idea that the ring had cost that much, enough to be insured.

"I know, but seriously? I don't need an expensive ring Sam".

That was just so typically Andy.

She wasn't a show and tell kind of girl, sure she like nice things, and nice clothes, but she wasn't flashy and high-maintenance.

That was why he chose their simple date months ago.

"Andy, if there is one thing that has to be the best; it's that. It's only ever going to happen once, so it has to be done right".

That made sense, it really did and she just loved him all the more for it.

"Okay, but don't think that this is over".

Andy stood on her toes and gave Sam a chaste peck on the lips, slipped her hand out of his and went to work.

When Andy got home from shift a warm welcome greeted her when she stepped through the door.

She had told Sam that Traci would drop her off after shift because they had house guests.

Sam had called her and let her know that Lars, Abigail and Alicia had arrived and that they were settled in.

Sarah had left after lunch after spending all morning fussing over the three new occupants in Sam's house.

Dinner was ready and everything neat and tidy when Andy arrived home- something that surprised her.

In honesty she had expected the house to be in some sort of mess.

Andy was formally introduced to Abigail and Alicia, who seemed to have taken a liking to Sam, and then she was ushered upstairs to shower while dinner was finished off.

Andy found Sam in the bedroom waiting for her when she came out of the bathroom, his brows creased as he seemed far away.

"You okay?" Andy asked while she dressed.

"Yeah, fine".

She stopped in front of Sam and had the puppy pout turned on to max while she waited for Sam to fill her in on what had made his mood move to sullen and sunken.

"They've just had a tough time".

Sam finally let it out.

"Well, we'll make it better now. Where did you put all their stuff?"

"That's the thing Andy, there isn't any 'stuff' ".

That kind of broke Andy's heart, and she knew that it was eating away at Sam too; that he hadn't been able to provide for Lars more than he had.

"They gave up everything to repay all the money back, they don't even have a TV set, who doesn't have a TV?".

"Sam, he is so honest, and so humble, it's worth more than any possessions that they can own. I have a huge flatscreen, and most of my furniture- they can keep. I don't really know him, but the fact that he gave up on stuff to look after a child that isn't his is more heart than I've seen in most people I know. You've given them a second new start, don't forget that".

Andy left Sam to collect himself for a few minutes while she went downstairs and asked if she could help with anything.

Sam was really hard on himself sometimes, wished he could change the world and took it personally when he couldn't.

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	30. Nothing Lasts Forever

**Hello again, sorry for the long time between updates, life has been crazy & I have a beautiful cold. So here's a really long chapter, hope it makes up for it! The chapter lightly skims over roughly five years, so hope you enjoy!**

**Thanks to the regulars, & kelly2727! If you're new, welcome to my world!**

**Thanks again for all the nominations for The Rookie Choice Awards 2013, hope you guys are all getting your votes in for your fav's!**

**Chapter 30- Nothing Lasts Forever. **

Weeks moved by progressively, everyone falling into rhythm as a routine was formed.

Andy had worn her ring to the Penny and Noelle had yelled it out like a happy lunatic.

But they were glad with that, that was more them; even if it had taken Noelle three hours and five drinks to notice.

Lars had joined the academy and was doing well, he was keen to learn and more enthusiastic than anyone Andy had ever seen. Even more so than Dov.

Andy had spent some time sorting out her condo on mornings when she had night shifts, and she spent weekends with Sam moving some things up to the new house or just kept him company while he made the few minor renovations that he wanted too in preparation for them to move in.

Abigail was quite shy, but she always made sure that dinner was ready and the laundry done when Sam and Andy walked in the door, even though Andy had told her hundreds of times that she didn't have to do it.

Sam's new position in Guns and Gangs had been just as he had promised up until now, he spent days in an office combing through the final details of all undercover's in play. And when Andy was home at night, so was he... Just like he had promised.

Jerry had finally asked Traci to move in, and she had said yes, something that made Andy's heart glow for them. Jerry made Traci and Leo really happy, and there was nothing that she wanted more than that for them.

Moving day was approaching, Andy enlisting the help of Traci for a little surprise that she had planned. She had spent the last weeks making stealth purchases and kept the tokens stashed at Traci's already boxed up apartment to avoid being caught out.

Sam had already moved all of the stuff that she wanted to keep out of the condo to the new house, with her clothes and personal items littering his house already. So all that was left were the new touches, and the place was set for it's new tenants.

It had been hard finding a loophole in her lease that allowed her to sublet, but when she had challenged the buildings body corporate with the argument that she still owned it, and paid for it, and that Lars and family were staying there without paying for it- they couldn't argue. It wasn't being subletted, because there was no exchange of cash, it was merely being lived in as per her instruction.

That was the deal she had cut with Lars- they would stay in her condo and look after it, in exchange she wouldn't be accepting any kind of gratuity.

Sam, just his name made her smile as she put the finishing touches on her creation.

For the last two weeks he had been coming home every single day with a bridal magazine or some or other kind of item hinting at a wedding.

She hadn't said anything, hadn't mildly hinted at a date, but she sure as hell got his hints. He wanted to set a date, but things were just kind of hectic at the moment.

"They're here" Traci said nudging Andy as they rushed out of the spare room and closed the door. Andy raced off to close the main bedroom door too, her mind thinking how weird it was to not call it her bedroom anymore.

Sam arrived with Lars and company towing behind him, their few items carried up in one trip.

Andy gave Sam a pointed stare and nodded towards the floor beneath his feet when he asked her where she wanted him to set the bags he was carrying down, Lars following suite as he got the same look from Andy.

"Alicia, how about we go see your room?". Andy asked as she bent down to the little girls eye level and held out her hand.

She had completely fallen in love with the little girl from the first time that she had been at home weeks ago. Alicia was shy, just like her mother, and she was always so prim and proper- just like a little girl.

Alicia nodded and took Andy's hand before allowing herself to be led down the hallway to her new room. When Andy opened the door, a tiny shriek could be heard echoing throughout the condo, sending a gallop of footsteps in their direction.

Sam arched an eyebrow when he got to the doorway, Andy's smile telling him that Andy was in her element as she watched Alicia walk around inside the bedroom looking at everything, but not touching.

"Ma'am?" Lars said when he took in the sight; his face lit up like it was christmas morning.

"Every little girl should have a little girls room Lars" was all Andy said in explanation.

She had transformed the spare room into a room with pink and white wall, teddy bears and toys lining the entire one side of the room.

The floor was made out of giant foam puzzle pieces where the carpet had been- a gift from Oliver considering that his youngest had outgrown it.

Traci had bought her the four poster canopy bed, Andy's practically new spare bed now in Sam's attic waiting for Leo.

Andy had gotten Alicia new bedding and curtains, all featuring the princesses of Disney, a bright matching set that lit up the room and made it come alive. She had also gotten her a few new outfits and some shoes and toys.

"Wow, Mommy look...". The tiny voice whispered out. She was completely in awe of all her new things, but was fascinated by the small pink TV and DVD player that stood at the foot end of the bed, a shelf with a collection of cartoons next to it.

Alicia suddenly stopped taking the room in and flew at Andy with super speed, her tiny arms wrapping around her legs in a tight squeeze. "Thank you Ma'am".

Andy was sure that Alicia actually thought that her name was 'Ma'am', because Lars still called her that, but she wouldn't relent to Andy, although Abagail had started using it at her request.

"Thank you Miss Traci" Alicia said and surprised everyone by flying at Traci to hug her legs too.

Leaving Alicia to lose herself in her new room, Andy took Abigail by the hand and led her to the main bedroom. Pausing outside the door, Andy whispered a soft "It's not much..." Before opening the door and watching Abigail's expression.

The woman just simply burst into tears.

Andy had new curtains and new bed linen on the bed for them. The closet door was open with a few items of clothing already hanging up with their labels still on.

"Those are from Gail and Trace, they've never been worn...". Andy tried to draw Abigal's attention as she looked around the room wide-eyed.

It wasn't that Abigail dressed badly, it was just that she deserved some new clothes... To feel good. Her clothing suited her, and it wasn't out of fashion or looked bad, it was just Traci's idea of getting Gail to put the money she spent on clothes she didn't wear, to good use.

They were close to the same size, and Gail had good taste so it was a close fit.

Sam stood watching Andy as she pointed out a few odds and ends that she had added to the room, like the maroon and black beside lamps, and the empty photo frame that would probably fit over twenty new photos in it; she was so lost in the moment that Sam saw a new side to her. It was one that he hadn't really seen before, it was total, carefree bliss.

When Lars came into the room a few minutes later Andy handed him an envelope and smiled before letting out a light giggle.

"I couldn't judge you're size, so I got you a voucher for the clothing store on Boulevard, hope that's okay...". Suddenly Andy looked a little nervous, like she felt uncomfortable as she shoved her hands into her back pockets and looked towards Sam.

"Thank you Ma'am, it... You didn't have too..." Lars was struggling to actually talk.

"I know, I just wanted too".

Sam slipped into the room and let his hand find Andy's before dragging her out of the room when he saw Traci nod towards the door indicating that she needed to leave.

They said goodbye and thanked her before Sam and Andy did the same and left the new couple to sort themselves out in their new home.

Sam was quiet throughout the drive back to his old house, his face not really showing any signs of the happiness that it had bore a while ago.

It was their last day at Sam's old house and he really didn't want to say the wrong thing right now. He was proud of Andy, and appreciated what she had done for Lars, but the fact that she had done it on her own was kind of eating away at him.

Andy sensed his mood change, like a switch flipped him into another zone.

"If this is about the money, don't even go there" Andy said as they walked through the front door.

Sam let out a frustrated sigh, of course she would pick up on what was getting to him.

"Andy.."

"Don't Sam okay. I did it because I could, and those faces were so worth it".

"It's not that, it's...". This was going to be so hard to say...

"It's because you did it on your own, you could have asked..."

"Asked you for money?" Andy sounded as if she couldn't really believe that when it came down to the bottom line- that's what he was really trying to say.

"Yes". No yup, no uh-hu, just a yes.

"Sam I don't need to ask you for money, I can manage on my own" with that, Andy left the room looking rather annoyed.

She found herself in the spare room making sure that all the boxed that were left were properly sealed and marked, even though she knew they already were. She just needed a break, a minute to get herself together as she reflected over what Sam had failed to say.

She had never asked anyone for money, except for change at the vending machine, or maybe Traci for a twenty when she left her cash in her locker by mistake and wanted lunch on patrol. But that was different.

She could feel Sam behind her before she heard or saw him in the room, of course he wouldn't let her walk away from this.

"I said that wrong" Sam started sounding more relaxed than he had been when they first came through the door.

"Then what are you saying? Because right now it sounds like you were expecting me to ask you for money".

"I want you to ask me for money for stuff like this Andy, or anything. I want us to share..."

"Share? You won't let me buy dinner if we order takeout, or pay for drinks at the Penny. You do all the grocery shopping when I'm at work, this is just me making up for it".

Sam blew out a long breath. She was right, her accusations were spot on, that was exactly what he had been doing. But it was just the way he was, the way he believed a woman should be treated, provided for.

Running a hand over his face, he pocketed his pride and let a weary grin slip over his face when his hand was out of the way.

"Don't you dare use the dimples Sam". Andy's tone sounded so much like it had the first time that she had spoken to him, way back when they first met.

"I'm not" Sam said trying to play innocent.

Andy blushed, and looked away, she couldn't stay mad at him even if she was trying too.

"Okay, you win. You can pay for dinner, and desert" Sam said making his way over to her. "And you can get the beer and wine, and I'll..."

"You'll?"

"I'll set a date because waiting is driving me crazy" Sam had taken her left hand in his, his thumb tracing over her ring as it ran over the band and back over her skin.

That seemed to take all her fire away, her eyes sparkling in delight as he cut the hinting and just said it out aloud.

"That's not fair".

"Andy, if you don't I will". Sam wasn't making a threat he was making her another promise.

"But..."

"June? July?"

"We need..."

"To set a date".

Everytime she attempted to say something he finished her sentence trying to swing the conversation in his favor.

"Sam!".

"I'm not kidding".

"Okay, September"

"Nope, too far, how about June?"

"Sam, that's next month"

"I know"

Andy let herself get swept away in thought. She had pretty much been waiting for this day, well forever, and she knew exactly what she wanted so..

"I'll think about it" she said before she second guessed herself.

Sam huffed out a cringed breath, his head moving down so that his forehead was resting on her shoulder.

"June" he mumbled.

"What is it with June?" Andy giggled our when Sam lifted his head second later.

"It's next month" he mumbled in reply.

"Have you given this a lot of thought?".

"Yup".

"Okay, so June eleventh?"

Andy wished that she had a camera when she answered, but the look on Sam's face was one that would forever be burned into the back of her memory.

...

The ensuing days were spent in their new home, everything finding it's place as they settled in.

After finally setting a date, Sam had gone full force ahead to stop dropping hints and just said what he thought and what he wanted while Andy made the arrangements.

It came across as quite a shock to everyone that they had suddenly set a date so close, but nobody thought that it was wrong or strange.

Two weeks later the invitations were handed out, the venue booked and Andy's dress decided on.

That was the hardest decision she had to make; the dress.

But once her mind was made up, everything else fell into place.

As the days drew closer to June eleventh, Andy's nerves began to show, but Sam had the calming effect he had always seemed to have over her.

Lars was done with training at the academy and Sam had requested he be placed at Fifteen, which was approved. Abigail was doing well too, she found a job at an upmarket restaurant and only worked day time. Alicia was in day care, and seemed to be coming out of her shell.

Sarah was great, better than great actually. She seemed to find some kind of inner peace that she had lost after Damian went to prison.

The day of Sam and Andy's wedding arrived, the small affair kept to minimal close friends and family just the way they wanted.

Sam had Oliver, Jerry and Lars as his best men and Andy had Gail and Abigail as bridesmaids and Traci as her maid of honor. Alicia was their flower girl and Leo the ring bearer.

Andy had asked Sarah to be her maid of honor, but Sarah had turned her down, explaining that it was Andy's special day and that she should have her friends. So Andy had convinced Sarah to give a speech instead. It wasn't much but it made Andy feel better because Sarah was included.

Tommy had walked Andy down the aisle of course, his smile divulging his pride at handing her over to a really good guy.

Sam and Andy had decided to forgo a honeymoon now, instead they had applied for leave in december and they would go away then.

Everything wad perfect, just the way the had wanted it, right down to the smallest detail.

They had taken a few extra days off after their wedding, and had been given an all expenses paid weekend away at a luxury hotel, so they had taken that instead the morning after a really late night spent celebrating.

Life ebbed away perfectly after that, Jerry finally proposed to Traci a few months after Sam and Andy's wedding, and she said yes.

Tommy was still staying sober, and found a companion.

Lars had asked Sam's permission to ask Abigail to marry him, and Sam had said that it was fine by him if Sarah agreed. Lars was becoming a good cop, and showed natural instincts and a lot of passion.

Sarah was still doing short term UC's and stayed safe, constant visits to Sam and Andy or Lars and Abigail a regular thing, the family bonds between them only growing closer and tighter.

Andy moved to the TO rotation, and Sam kept running UC's from his office.

Life was great, until Sarah showed up on Andy's doorstep drunk while Sam was at work after a UC gone wrong.

Andy opened the door after being woken up by a crash followed by loud knocking to find Sarah a complete wreck as she tried to hold the wall up.

Andy ushered her inside and snatched the half empty bottle of whiskey from her hand. Andy made Sarah strong black coffee and handed it to Sarah who found a place to sit on the couch.

Andy didn't pressure Sarah for details as to what was wrong- like Sam she would talk when she was ready.

After a long silence filled with Sarah's sniffles, Sarah finally found the strength to utter two words that made Andy's heart break for her "He's dead".

There was only one person's death that would affect Sarah in such a way besides Sam's or Lars' and this wasn't about one of them. Andy would have heard if it had been one of them, so it left Damian.

Sarah mumbled a few broken sentences between tears telling Andy that a fight had broken out in the prison and that Damian's throat had been slit- he bled out before anyone could get to him.

Over the five years that Damian had been incarcerate Sarah had made regular visits to him too, every single time she had been done here, she had been to see him.

Andy watched Sarah completely snap, her tears rolling down her cheeks freely as her life came to a complete standstill.

Sarah cried herself to sleep on the couch, Andy tugging a blanket of her while she waited for Sam to come home.

She had spent an hour trying to put herself in Sarah's shoes, but her mind wouldn't even allow herself to consider the possibility of losing Sam one day.

When he finally appeared at the door, it was almost five am, the search for the missing UC having slipped through the night.

Sam looked at Sarah passed out on the couch, then Andy lingering in the doorway, his heart breaking for his sister, but feeling a little lighter because she had chosen to turn to his wife when she needed someone.

"I heard" Sam whispered in Andy's ear as he bent down to kiss her hello.

...

The week that followed was hard for Sam and Andy, they had to stand by idly and watch Sarah lose herself and her strength as she tried to grasp reality.

Sarah had been informed that Damian's body would be released to her so that they could have a funeral. Plans were made with Sarah staying at Sam and Andy while everything was arranged.

The funeral was small, with only Sam, Andy, Sarah and Lars in attendance. Abigail had wanted to attend, but she couldn't take an off day. Elliot was there too, he was in a suite, but shackled and cuffed, with two armed guards.

He had received a lighter sentence than Damian, twenty-five years, but by the time he was eligible for parole, he'd be in his late fifties, so his life was pretty much over.

Sarah stayed the night of the funeral but was gone the next morning when Andy went to wake her for breakfast, a note left on her empty pillow thanking them both for being there for her, and telling them how much she loved them. She left an envelope for Lars, and one for Sam which sent Sam into panic mode.

It was like she was saying goodbye.

Sam called Sarah and she answered, his nerves calming immensely when he heard her voice.

Three days later, Sarah left Sam a voicemail telling him that she had another UC and would be gone for a while.

Sam understood, it was her way of coping, her way of letting go. Her way of healing.

...

Eighteen months had passed since they last heard from Sarah, but Sam was keeping silent tabs on her through unofficial lines.

Married life suited him, Andy making everything worth it.

He wouldn't change that for anything in the world.

Andy had a working weekend, Sam one off- something that seemed to happen frequently.

Patrol had been quiet, her rookie; from the second batch of new rookies now a part of Fifteen since she had been one, keeping her company while they patrolled.

This rookie had keen instincts, and was really honest- he was like the male version of Gail.

He used to be in the military, a tour in Afghanistan recently before he decided that it wasn't what he wanted to do.

Andy let him drive, and get her coffee, all the things that she had and had not been doing as a rookie when she first started out at Fifteen.

Most of the time the rookies were younger than Andy, but this particular one was two years older so it kind of felt weird training him. But they got on well.

Patrolling a quiet suburban area, dispatch called their unit back to the barn. Andy let out a giggle and raised her brows as she faced her rookie and asked "Nick, what have you done?".

"Nothing, I swear".

Arriving at the barn, Frank waived Andy into his office, her heart rate accelerating to thunder.

Her first thought was that something had happened to Sam, or Traci, or Lars.

"It's not Sam" Frank said as soon as he saw her panicked face.

"But do you know where he is?".

Andy shook her head, she hadn't heard from Sam all day, meaning only that he was somewhere that he couldn't talk to her.

"It's Sarah".

Andy's heart stopped.

"She's been off the wire for twenty-four hours, her UC apartment shows signs of a struggle and traces of blood. It doesn't look good, I'm sorry".

Andy knew that she had to find Sam and let him know, so she left Frank's office after he told her to go.

"Andy, you okay?" Nick asked when she breezed past him.

"I'm sorry, I've got to go" she said before jogging towards the locker room.

Today had started out as a good day, even though she had woken up to Sam already gone.

She had gotten out of bed, and had her coffee hoping that it would calm her queasy stomach, something that had been lingering for a while.

Catching sight of the giant calendar that hung on the kitchen wall as she sipped her coffee, her mind had frozen as she stared at it.

Having the sudden urge to pee, Andy raced for the bathroom making a short stop on the way.

When she was done, she waited the two minutes required. After that she waited another ten before she had worked up the courage to look at the stick.

The positive result made her feel really happy, happy enough to explode.

Then she remembered that this was one topic that she had never talked over with Sam. One topic they had never discussed at all, ever.

Kids.

But she had seen him with Leo and Alicia over the years, he would be a great dad.

And she really didn't think he'd be disappointed or upset by it.

So she had carried the news alone until she told Sam first. She hadn't even told Traci when they had gotten together for lunch with their rookies at a diner across town.

Besides, it wasn't confirmed yet, the stick could still be wrong.

As Andy stripped out of her uniform and tugged on jeans and a shirt her happiness subsided into fear and panic as she let her mind carry her away on all the possibilities of Sarah's disappearance ending badly.

When she was dressed, she handed her gun in and the cruiser keys, Nick watching her from the front desk where he had obviously been reassigned by Frank now that he was on his own.

Andy managed an apologetic smile in his direction before leaving the barn and going in search of Sam.

*******Thanks for reading!**

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	31. The Sad Truth

**Hi there, as always thank you for the reviews, follows & fav's! **

**Thanks to the regulars for bearing with me, & kelly2727 for her awesomeness!**

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**Chapter 31- The Sad Truth. **

Andy stopped by Sam's office looking for him, but nobody had any idea where he was. His phone was still off too.

She left a message for him to call her at the office and about seven the same on voicemail.

She figured that Guns and Gangs knew about Sarah, but for now they were keeping it away from Sam.

Even though it sounded so wrong, it was the best option there was right now because Sam would probably go rogue and go looking for Sarah and that would end badly if he wasn't thinking straight.

Everywhere Andy could think of looking turned up empty, so she went home and prepared herself for a long wait.

Three hours later Sam came home after getting her message at his office, calling the barn and Frank telling him that she had left work.

The first look she gave him told him that something was very wrong.

"It's... Just don't freak out, they don't know anything yet, but Sarah missing".

It had gone so much better and so much easier in her head, the million times that she had run those words over in her mind in preparing to tell Sam.

She had seen a few looks on his face over the years, but none of them had prepared her for the heartbreaking devastation that she saw as the color drained from his cheeks and his jaw clench shut.

"Ho...how long?". He barely managed the words, but they came even though he looked like he had shut down completely.

"Thirty hours" Andy couldn't lie to him, and she couldn't bend the truth. Not even knowing that what she was going to say was going to have repercussions.

Sam was staring at Andy like he was in physical pain, his face turning to a mask that held nothing. No feeling, no fear, no emotion.

Just nothing.

"Sam, she'll be okay".

"Don't Andy" Sam said walking out of the room.

He didn't want to hear that, hear that Sarah was going to be okay when chances were that she was already dead or worse.

Andy followed Sam into the room that Sam had converted into a sort of office at home for himself, for when he needed to work but wanted to stay home.

There were no important files or names or anything incriminating here, just ideas and solutions that were mostly invisible.

"Sam, you can't give up on her..." Andy's voice filtered through to him amidst the loathsome thoughts he was having in his own mind.

"Andy, I'm not okay. I..." He didn't even know what he was.

He wasn't feeling anything right now other than total numbness, and his mind had shut down, only lurid images plaguing it. All logic had escaped him completely.

Andy watched Sam pull into a shell she had never seen him crawl into before, and it was hard to watch.

It was like watching a horror movie and the music tells you that something is about to happen, so you cover your eyes with your fingers and peek out between them so that you don't miss whatever's going to happen although you know that you'll regret looking. Even if Andy wanted to, she could find it in herself to look away from Sam right now.

Sam suddenly moved, his body tense.

He rounded his desk and unlocked the drawer with a key he retrieved from a box on a shelf. Seconds later he had his personal gun out the drawer, his hands checking to see that the safety was on and that the magazine was fully loaded.

"No!". Andy's voice came out on ripples of agony.

"Andy, I have..."

"No Sam, you need to leave this alone". She knew that he wouldn't, from the second that she had heard about Sarah, she knew that Sam was going to go after whoever took her.

"Andy, she's my sister". Sam had shoved the gun into the waistband of his jeans and moving towards the door, Andy refusing to move out of the way as she blocked his only route of escape. He just had to see reason first, promise her that he wouldn't be reckless and put himself and Sarah in danger because his head wasn't screwed on straight.

"Sam, seriously? You think I don't know that? You can't do this, if they find out that you're looking for her...". The sentence died off, she really didn't want to have to say those words.

"This is something I have to do, so just...". He caught the move before it slipped out.

"No".

"Andy". For the first time in his relationship with her, Sam yelled at her. Yelled her name out so loudly that she visibly jumped before retreating out of the doorway.

Sam crossed the lounge to the front door, his hand barely touching the cold metal when Andy's voice found his ears.

"Sam, if you walk out that door you're never coming home. I can't raise a baby on my own".

Sam froze. But just for a split second until his body caught up with his brain and he turned to find her standing in the lounge doorway with tears clinging to her cheeks.

"What?". It wasn't exactly the best word he could have said at the moment, but it was the only one that came out when he opened his mouth.

Crap! She had been rehearsing this conversation in her head so many times that she had forgotten that she hadn't actually told Sam, she'd only had the one sided conversation and imagined his possible reactions.

"I think...".

Andy would have thought that it would be easier to say seeing as practice makes perfect, but that wasn't the case. She totally clammed shut.

Sam retraced a few steps towards her, his face frowning as he tried to get himself together.

"Baby?" He uttered under his breath, the word feeling foreign and sounding strange as it passed over his lips.

"Yeah, I think so".

"You think?" Sam sounded mad, not a reaction she had anticipated from him. But she understood how off her timing was, and how wrong it was to just throw this at him, toss it out there like it was leverage that would make him stay.

Andy walked away and went into their bedroom coming out seconds later with the home pregnancy pee stick in her hand.

She looked between Sam and the stick before throwing it at him and walking away.

The bedroom door slammed shut behind her, it's echo reverberated loudly through the house.

Sam stood staring at the stick before bending down and picking it up only to stare at it even more.

Kids.

Something he and Andy had never really talked about.

He knew that when it came to the 'mommy department' that she was silently harboring a fear that one day she'd turn out like her own mother, and have the urge to walk away from her own child. It was the reason that he had waited so long to say anything about having kids. He figured that when the time was right, or she was ready, she'd say something.

There wasn't anything that he wanted, that he didn't already have, except kids with Andy.

Now he'd marred her happy announcement with a reaction that she'd probably never forgive him for, but he couldn't help it, he was just all over the place right now.

When he had heard that Sarah was off the wire, time stopped. It was his biggest fear when it came to her- the fear that she'd get herself hurt or killed because she loved her job so much and did it with everything she had in her.

His instincts to protect kicked in, the reason he was planning on leaving, he wanted to help find her before time ran out; if there was any time left on her side.

He'd do the same thing if it was Andy.

Closing his fingers around the stick, he held on to it as his other hand rubbed over his face, he was torn in two.

He needed to go help find Sarah, if she was off the wire chances were that she had been made and her life was in serious danger. He needed to tell Andy that he was happy about the baby, and that there wasn't anything besides that; that he needed to fulfill his life. He needed to say sorry and tell her that he loves her.

But Sarah needed him more right now.

Setting the stick down on the counter Sam looked towards the closed bedroom door, his heart heavy with so many emotions that it fell from his chest cavity, hit the floor and shattered into a million pieces.

He knew that Andy hadn't meant to throw the news at him, she hadn't meant to make him feel like he had to choose between her and Sarah, it was just her way of giving him a reason to come home. A reason to make him get his head screwed on straight before he left, because she knew he was going too, and she wasn't trying to stop him.

Sam tugged his wedding ring off and held it up, his eyes grazing over Andy's initials inscribed on the inside of the band before he set it down on the counter too. He'd never taken it off. Ever.

But now he had too, if he wanted her to stay safe, if he got into trouble he didn't want anything leading anyone back here.

With one last look at the bedroom door Sam left Andy alone with nothing more than uncertainties filling his mind, and fears clouding his heart.

Andy could have sworn that she heard Sam stop outside the bedroom door, but she wasn't sure. There were no sounds in the house, it had been quiet since she slammed the door closed.

They had moved their bedroom to upstairs, Andy loved the huge bathtub that Damian had installed for Sarah, and the bigger bathroom, so it made sense.

Their 'old bedroom' downstairs was nothing more than an empty room void of furniture, but full of memories now.

Andy got up off the bed and went to wash her face knowing that Sam had left.

Looking at herself in the mirror above the basin, the water droplets clinging to her face and her eyes still red, she regretted the way that she had told Sam and that he left without saying goodbye. She could have handled it better.

But how do you when the other person is falling apart at the seams and has so much going on in their head, while their broken heart is displayed on their face?

How do you comfort a person that won't let you in, or take away the one thing you wished you could when it was ripping them apart? You can't.

So she did the only thing she could think of, she gave Sam a reason to want to come home, because as long as he wanted to come home he had a chance too.

...

Three days had gone by, with no word on Sarah or Sam except the few messages that Jerry had conveyed to Andy from Sam.

Jerry was assisting Guns and Gangs from Fifteen by helping on Sarah's case and keeping in touch with Sam.

The three times that Jerry had come and given her the messages, Andy had tried to cover up her hurt that he hadn't called her himself to pass them on even though she understood his reasons- the same reason that his wedding ring hung around her neck after she found it on the counter the night he left. He was trying to protect her.

Sam's messages never had words of love, or apologies in them when Jerry passed them on so Andy wondered if he was saving those to say to her when he came back himself.

Traci had come over the night Sam left after Andy cracked in the solitude of being alone, and she still spent nights there so that Andy wouldn't be alone if bad news brought Frank to her front door in the middle of the night.

Andy kept to her shifts, forcing herself to keep busy so that she could stay sane.

By the forth day Andy was showing her tiredness and her inability to focus when Frank stood in front of her after dismissing parade and she had yet to leave her seat.

"McNally" he suddenly snapped, her attention focusing on him as she looked his way and sat up straight.

"Sir?".

"You okay?" Frank said closing the door to the parade room before sitting down next to her.

She'd had come a long way since being a rookie, one of the best he'd seen and he wasn't saying that because she had captivated one of his closest friends.

"Yup, totally fine"

Frank let out a dry chuckle at her failure to lie. No matter how hard she tried, she just didn't have it in her too.

"No really?" Frank made a rash decision this morning when Sam called and asked him to keep McNally off patrol until he was back because she was pregnant. It came as a bit of a shock because for a staff sergeant he'd missed all the signs.

Sam had asked how she was and asked Frank to keep it between them, he didn't want her getting hurt or reckless because she wasn't focused. He also told Frank where he was, something Frank wasn't supposed to tell McNally no matter what. But seeing her here, like this- miserable and hurting and worried, it wasn't good for the baby especially this early in her pregnancy.

"Morning sickness getting to you?".

Andy's face showed her shock, only Sam knew. She couldn't even bring herself to tell Traci yet, because so many things could go so wrong.

"It's my job to know these things" Frank said with the feint traces of a sad smile on his face.

Andy looked away feeling slightly ashamed that she hadn't told Frank yet, considering that it was risky for her on the streets.

"Get out of your uniform, and take this to Guns and Gangs" Frank said holding out a USB stick.

"Sir?". She so didn't want to do that, didn't want to go there right now.

"It's an order McNally, that's your duty for today, and take a few days..."

"No. Um, I mean I need to do this. I can't sit at home not knowing...".

"Look I know it's hard, it's hard for Sammy too. You're here going through this without him, so we're looking after you until he gets back. That's our first Fifteen Baby, and we're taking care of it like it's all of ours. Take the days McNally, I'm not asking". Frank got up and moved to leave when Andy found her feet and whispered a thank you.

After calling Traci and telling her where she was going before she went home, Andy shook off her uniform and slid into her own clothes.

She tucked the USB stick into her pocket and left the barn heading towards Guns and Gangs.

The entire drive over there had her hating the words Guns and Gangs with so much passion that she began to tremble.

When she met Sam, it brought them together. Then it stopped her from letting him in. When she let him in, it reclaimed him with promises of keeping him safer than being on the street might.

Now, the only thing that Guns and Gangs represented, was the fact that it was tearing her family apart and there wasn't a damned thing that she could do about it.

********Thanks for reading!**

**So who's still here? And what do you think? Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	32. When All Hope Is Gone

**Thank you all for the awesome reviews & follows! Thanks to the regulars & kelly2727!**

**Welcome to the newbies!**

**Chapter 32- When All Hope Is Gone. **

Andy entered the building not really sure where she was supposed to go or what she was supposed to do when she got there.

A few familiar faces tried to smile her way, but they were finding it hard because they knew what was going on and what she was going through.

Old habits forced Andy to head straight in the direction of Sam's office, her feet taking slower steps as she neared the window.

Movement caught out of the corner of her eye made her stop and look a little to the left, a mass of dark hair visible through the crack of the half open door at the end of a short hallway.

Andy moved without thinking, the hair so familiar that she knew each and every one of them by touch.

Andy saw the back of Sam, an unfamiliar face over his shoulder as a guy she didn't know spoke to Sam so softly that she couldn't hear what he was saying even though she was right outside the door.

Sam suddenly lunged at the guy, grabbing the scruff of his collar and walking him backwards as he let out the worst sentence that she had ever heard in a broken tone. His voice was so broken, that even though she knew it was Sam, it didn't sound like him at all.

"It's not her".

"Sammy, I'm sorry. It's her..."

"No! I want to see her".

Andy pushed the door open and walked up to stand behind Sam, her hand on his shoulder as she said his name.

Sam's hands flew away from the guys clothing as he turned to face Andy, his face contorted into a look that scared Andy.

But the worst sight, was his eyes. They'd gone black, the fire of life having gone out in them leaving them dull and lifeless.

Sam took one look at Andy and felt all his anger fade away. It was like everything else became blurry and the only thing that he could see was Andy standing there.

She knew, without him having to say the words, she knew.

Her eyes welled up instantaneously, her head shaking from side to side as she tried to deny the ugly truth.

"Sam...". She couldn't say more than that, her voice obliterated to nonexistent even though she tried.

Sam reached out for her, his hands pulling her forwards forcefully as though he thought she was about to evaporate before his eyes.

He wrapped her up in a hug, his body trembling as he held on to her while she tried to keep herself strong for his sake.

As second ticked by, Andy felt Sam's stubble tickle her neck as his face tucked itself away into her neck. A sudden wetness rolled down her neck, the sleek glide of a tear making it's presence know as it slid down into the hollow of her collar bone.

But she didn't let go of Sam, she just squeezed a little tighter.

Sam eventually unwrapped himself from her, his hand still tucked around her hip as he left it to rest there.

The guy that was in the room with Sam had slipped out without them noticing, leaving them alone together.

"Sam, I'm so sorry" Andy managed as she put her hand to his cheek even though it was scratchy.

Sam looked away, his teeth tugging on the inside of his cheek.

After a while they left, Andy forgetting all about the USB as they made their way home locked in silence.

Sam opened the front door and walked straight through the house to their bedroom where Andy heard a loud crash as Sam hit something.

It didn't matter what it was, he needed to let off some steam so she let him. She however wasn't bargaining on the huge hole she found in the bedroom door when the room went silent and she went to check on Sam.

She could hear the water of the shower running, a cloud of steam flowing out of the small gap between the bathroom door and the doorframe.

Andy followed her gut and ventured into the bathroom to find Sam in the shower, his head bent down under water that was way too hot for anyone to handle.

Andy shrugged off the fact that she was still fully clothed, and stepped into the shower behind Sam and turned the cold water faucet on before he gave himself third degree burns.

But Sam didn't move, just stayed in the same position, one hand on the wall, his head under the cooler spray of water.

As soon as Andy moved to get out of the shower, Sam's hand snapped to hers and held on tightly, his face revealing how broken he was right now.

"Don't leave" he whispered out making Andy feel like crying all over again.

"I won't".

By the time Sam made it out of the shower Andy had stripped of her wet clothes and put one dry ones, her hair pulled up into a damp bun.

Andy made them coffee while Sam dressed, her hands still shaking as she held his out for him.

She moved to the lounge and curled up on the couch, her feet tucked in under her while her mind ran memories of Sarah through it.

Sam sat down next to her, but kept a small space between them. He didn't feel like they had reached the place they were before all this happened.

"Have you eaten?" He suddenly blurted out facing her, giving her the stare that dared her to say she wasn't hungry.

Andy shook her head, she had been eating what she could over the last few day, but this morning hadn't been one of those days.

"You need to eat". Sam said as he stood up and went to the kitchen.

Andy followed to find Sam laying out items for one sandwich.

"And yours?". Andy asked as she held out a jar of peanut butter to Sam who was shaking his head.

"Sam, you need to eat".

"Later, I um... Need to go see Lars".

Wow, that had completely slipped her mind.

Andy nodded sadly and took the sandwich from Sam.

Sam waited for Andy to eat then looked at her solemnly, he needed her to go with him to tell Lars, he couldn't face the kid on his own.

Lars had been told that Sarah was off the wire, Sam had told him when he saw the kid at the barn the night he left, when he went to see Frank.

Lars was optimistic, it was in his nature so he believed that Sarah would come home okay.

Now Sam was going to take away the hope that Lars had clung to and tell him how ugly real life was. Lars was a cop, he'd seen things that any one person shouldn't have to but it wasn't the same; the people involved were strangers. Lars hadn't ever really lost anyone close to him- excluding the father he never knew and the mother that threw him away like trash.

Andy didn't need to be asked to go with Sam, she was going whether or not he wanted her too, but not just for him, for Lars too.

When they arrived at Lars' Andy felt her stomach drop when he opened the door and saw their faces. It didn't take him more than a split second to know why they were here.

Lars moved out of the doorway, without saying a word but he didn't have too, his face said it all.

Giving a death notification was always hard, but having to do it to your own kind was even harder, but having to do it with family- that should never happen.

After spending some time with Lars and making sure that he would be okay, Sam and Andy left and returned home.

Sam was distant, removed from himself but Andy couldn't blame him, she really didn't have it in her too.

Oliver called and so had Jerry, but Sam let their calls ring through to voicemail. Traci called Andy and asked how Sam was, and how she was and Andy had a mini breakdown in the bathroom. She didn't want to cry in front of Sam, she was barely holding it together, but she had to- for him.

Time evolved, Sam staring off into space most of the time while Andy set out to make dinner even though she doubted that either of them would eat.

By the time they went to bed, Sam had faded away to be replaced by nothing more than an outer shell.

Andy dozed off while Sam lay awake watching her sleep.

He tried to imagine them at a time when they first met, but it only brought on an onslaught of memories about Sarah.

Sam still had to talk to Andy about the fact that she was pregnant, he didn't even have the faintest idea if she was happy about the baby or not, or if she... Sam pushed that thought out of his mind as soon as it crashed through it. Of course she'd keep it, what the hell was he thinking?

He on the other hand had been ready for this since he met her, he'd just never told her that.

Squinting in the dark, Sam tried to make out if she had a bump yet or not, then scalded himself for his own stupidity. Of course she wouldn't, she wasn't further along than a few weeks at most.

Sam grew restless, tossing and turning as he tried to imagine how Sarah would have felt about the baby. She would have hit the roof and climbed the walls from sheer happiness at getting a niece or nephew, and would have spoiled them rotten.

It was a heartbreaking thought to know that she'd never get the chance.

Andy sighed in her sleep and shifted around, she too was restless.

Putting on his bedside lamp, Sam went on a mission to get her to understand. He gently let his hand find her stomach under her shirt and ran his fingers up and down her skin, while whispering her name.

Andy's eyes flew open, her head lifting up a fraction to see what his hand was doing although she could feel it.

"I'm sorry" Sam said when she rubbed her eyes and blinked them rapidly to get them to focus on him.

"It's okay" Andy said, her hand moving to rest on top of his still sprayed across her stomach.

"I didn't meant to say it like that, to tell you that way. I just wanted you to know, in case...".

"I know. You gave me something to stop me".

Andy's eyebrows knitted together as she listened to Sam and watched him prop himself up on one elbow facing her.

"When I left I had every intention of going looking for her, but you made me stop and think. I spent three days in my office, sleeping on the couch going through her cases".

Wow, Andy hadn't been assuming anything remotely close to that as how he spent those days.

"Sam...". She didn't want him to feel guilty about Sarah, or feel like if she hadn't said what she had, and he hadn't stopped to think, he could have saved her.

"No, I don't think that, I don't feel that. It's kinda hard to explain..."

Again with his inability to express his feelings.

"When you do this long enough, with no-one to come home to you start living for the thrill, the adrenaline. You come home from a UC on a high that's indescribable, but when you come down you crash. It's like a drug, when you come down you need more"

Sam paused, took a breather before continuing "Sarah died...um, doing what she loved, making the world a better place, she wouldn't have wanted it any other way".

Andy watched Sam visibly tense again when he said that Sarah was dead, like the words weren't only hard to say, but hard to accept.

"Sam.."

"I had a choice Andy, and I chose to try and find her the best way I knew how without losing it, and without putting us in more danger. She would never have forgiven me if something happened to me, and I left you alone to raise this baby"

Andy knew that he was right, Sarah would never have forgiven him, but that didn't mean that he had to live with the guilt that he didn't do enough, or didn't try hard enough to find her. He shouldn't feel like her death was on his hands because he failed.

"Nothing I could have done could have changed the outcome, it was just meant...".

Sam was having a hard time talking now, so he left it alone and just watched Andy watching him instead.

"Sam you tried, we all know that, but don't blame yourself. I can't loose you too".

For the first time since Sarah went missing Sam realized that he wasn't the only one that lost Sarah. Besides Lars, he hadn't really taken anyone else into consideration, not even Andy.

She had grown so close to Sarah over the years that they were in some ways closer than he was to either of them.

He had seen Andy showing signs of a broken heart, but he hadn't seen the fear it hid, the fear she had that this would come between them or that she would lose a part of him because he lost himself.

"I'm not going anywhere" Sam said sitting up straight and looking down at her.

Andy was all over the show right now, her emotions a jumble of things she didn't want to feel. She was happy, no ecstatic about the baby, and devastated about Sarah at the same time. She felt for Sam, and Lars, and felt their loss, the hole that was suddenly there now filling Sarah's shoes. She was scared for Sam too, not knowing how he'd cope now that the one thing that had kept him grounded was gone.

And now he was making promises that he may not be able to keep.

Sam saw her thoughts cloud over her face, her tears already sparkling in her eyes.

"Andy all I ever wanted was someone like you, and I had to fight to get you. Now that I have you the only thing that I didn't have was this..." Sam ran his hand over Andy's stomach again.

"Now I have everything I've ever wanted, trust me- I'm not going anywhere for a really long time".

His words made her smile, inside and out. It was all she needed to hear to know that even though he hadn't shown it, he was really happy about the baby, like his life had been fulfilled.

"Promise me that Sam, swear to me that you mean it".

"I promise, not going anywhere" Sam said kissing her face.

*****thanks for reading!**

**Sorry I kinda killed of Sarah, so let me know what you think about that in the little button that says review under here!**

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	33. No Surrender

**Hello again, thank you all for all your awesomeness! **

**Thanks to the regulars & kelly2727 as well as a big welcome to all those new names I keep see popping up!**

**Chapter 33- No Surrender. **

**WARNING****; This chapter contains mentions of violence & might be cosidered graphic- it explains the extent of Sarah's injuries. If it's not your thing- please skip the chapter & don't read it. **

Andy woke up alone the next morning in a cold bed. Sam had been up a while.

Just as thoughts of him came to mind, he walked into the bedroom all hot and sweaty- he'd been for a run.

Sam had tried to sleep, then tried to lay still so that Andy could sleep; but it wasn't working. His gut kept telling him that he was missing something, that Sarah left a clue behind, he just wasn't seeing it.

He'd spent hours at her UC apartment, then hours going over the crime scene photos in his office; but there just wasn't anything there.

He had climbed out of bed around three am and decided to go for a run, so he spent the next two hours trying to clear his head.

He still thought he was missing something. In fact, he knew he was. He knew Sarah.

When he found Andy awake, he sat down on the end of the bed and played with her hair for a while. She was content to lay there like this, sharing a quiet moment with him.

"You know I'm sorry I left right?". His words came out on a soft cord.

Andy sat up straight and turned to face him, her face still wearing her sad mask.

"Sam, I know it didn't go well when you left, but I knew you were going too; I just wanted you to come home. I didn't expect you to stay".

Her words hurt a little, stung actually. She had been expecting him to leave, and she had been right.

"It's just- I felt like I abandoned you and the baby when you needed me? You told me you're pregnant and I run out the door".

Sam needed to shave, his prickly hairs under her hand as she put it to his cheek made her hand tingle. "Sam, it wasn't like that okay. Sarah was in trouble, I was okay. I shouldn't have thrown it at you on your way out the door, I just wanted you to know so that you would fight to come home. It was kind of selfish, but I can't do this without you".

Sam stared at his wife, she truly was amazing.

She had grown over the last few years, becoming strong and confident, but the thing that amazed him the most was her trust and confidence in him.

Sam knew that she silently carried abandonment issues with her because of her mother, but strangely enough, they'd never surfaced- not even now.

"You know I'll always come back right? If I ever walk away I'll come home. If it ever looks like I'm walking away I'll always be back I promise you that Andy".

Andy's heart broke at his words, she could tell that he truly meant them. He would always be back, always come home no matter what.

After a while he went and put the kettle on then headed for the shower. He'd make her herbal tea instead of coffee when he came out the shower.

Andy was already dressed and in the kitchen when he made it downstairs, the smell of coffee making him step up his pace to stop her just as she lifted the mug to her lips.

He snatched it away, Andy glaring at him. "No coffee, it makes baby boys hyperactive. Like little Epstein's". Sam visibly shuddered when he said that, Andy laughing at Dov being intrusive and blamed, even though he wasn't around.

"I need to go see Frank, and take care of a few things". Sam said kissing Andy on the forehead with every intention of leaving.

"I know, I'm ready to go".

Sam smiled at her gratefully, he should have known that he wouldn't shake her. Not that he wanted too.

They arrived at the barn, a few condolences passed to them as they were stopped several times on the way to see Frank.

Andy saw Traci come in and nodded in her direction, Sam whispering a "Go tell her" in Andy's ear. He knew that she hadn't told anyone yet, but that she was so desperate to share the news with Nash.

Andy left Sam and followed Traci into the locker room, her presence still unseen.

"What ya doing?" Andy said when she was close enough to Traci, hearing her own voice fail miserably at trying to sound normal.

"Andy, hey sweetie. How are you holding up, how's Sam holding up?" Traci embraced her in a tight hug.

"I'm good, Sam's...not so good". Andy's face fell as she said that, it was really breaking her heart to have to admit it to someone.

"Let me know if you guys need anything. Jerry said they found her almost two hundred miles from here?".

"Yeah, they won't let Sam see her".

Neither one of the woman said anything about what that meant, they both knew that Sarah wasn't in good shape if they wouldn't let Sam see her.

Especially if he was a cop that had been on the force for many years, and had done a lot of UC work.

"I don't even know what to say to you Andy"

"I know, but thanks. Um, so any news you care to share?" Andy said drifting off the subject of her pain.

"Nope, Leo got a good report, my Mom still makes me do the dishes after dinner. Jerry's good, I'm fine. I just miss you".

"I miss you too" Andy said smiling at Traci, she really was such a great person, and an awesome best friend.

"Okay, so maybe I have some news to tell you?".

"Yeah, then tell me, don't tease me".

"I think I'm pregnant" Andy couldn't help but smile when she said that, it was as though saying it out loud just made it more real.

"Wow, really? That's great, I'm so happy for you. Wait, have you told Sam?". Traci was cringing when she asked that, she knew that they had a lot going on.

"Damn it Jerry, something's wrong here, it doesn't fit". Sam's voice was raised, his temper flaring.

The more he tried to tell Jerry that something was wrong, the less Jerry was listening.

"Sammy, I get it you're having a tough time, but that's all there is. There is nothing missing, there is nothing else".

Sam slammed his hand down onto the table between them and flew out of his chair. He had asked to see Sarah's file, but Jerry refused to give it to him. Jerry said that it wouldn't make a difference. Sarah had been identified by her fingerprints, and Sam wasn't allowed to see her. That was the end of the story, but Sam wasn't buying it.

"Jer, you don't get it. This is my sister, not some random case off the street. I want to know what they did to her, what happened to her and I'm not letting it go until I know".

Jerry sat back in his chair, and eyed Sam. His friend really wanted this, but he wasn't sure that Sammy would like what he saw or accept the truth once he knew it.

"Okay, okay. ME report, and that's it. No photos, and NO file Sam".

He didn't want Sam anywhere near this.

He was convinced that it was what it looked like, but apparently Sam thought otherwise.

Jerry left Sam alone in the interview room and went to get the ME report on his desk. They had emailed it to him after pulling Sarah Swarek out of a lake in the early hours of yesterday morning.

He was surprised that it was done so quickly, but her body was taken to a town that really didn't have that many deaths in it, so the ME only had her to process.

Jerry found Sam where he left him, pacing the interior of the room like a caged animal.

"If I give you this you need to promise me that you'll leave this alone Sammy". And Jerry meant it, he meant it for Sam's sake and Andy's safety. And both of their sanity.

Sam nodded and held out his hand, Jerry handing over the papers before patting Sam on the back and leaving him alone.

Sam sat down and took a deep breath, the papers laying facing downwards as he tried to stop his hands from shaking.

Flipping the papers over, Sam started reading.

Sarah had been brutally beaten, two of her teeth knocked out and found at the scene. He knew that, that was in the crime scene photos and the report. But still, it sickened him.

She'd put up one hell of a fight for her tiny size. Her blazing spirit never being allowed to die down because she wouldn't let it.

She had cuts and bruises to her hands, broken fingernails, telling Sam that she had given out a few punches of her own, it didn't matter how big her attacker or attackers had been. DNA had been taken on the skin removed from underneath her nails, she had scratched her attacker deeply.

She had been tied up, rope burns around her wrists and ankles confirming it. She had also probably kicked the crap out of her attacker, she had two broken toes and severe bruising to her shin's and foot. She had been found wearing her sneakers, so it was entirely plausible.

She had severe internal bleeding from the beating, severe head trauma and her...

Sam took a breath and looked away from the printed words that were ripping his insides out.

Sarah had her tongue cut out, the explanation to the amount of blood found in her apartment. But they didn't find the removed piece. Her internal bleeding and injuries most likely allowed her to cough up a lot of the blood too.

It told Sam that she had been made, they didn't want her talking.

Her body was dumped in a lake, two days spent in the water and basking in the sun had allowed it to start decomposing rapidly. Trace evidence had also washed away, like the rope fibers, there simply weren't any.

Sam was relieved to find no mention of her being harmed other than the beating, but it still did little to calm the rage he felt right now. And the sick feeling invading his stomach.

She had suffered, for hours but her injuries showed no signs of her weakening, some of the bruising being inflicted postmortem, which meant that she hadn't talked. Whatever they wanted to know- she hadn't told them.

No matter what they had done to her, she had stayed strong, stayed fighting until she took her last breath.

She was also high when she died. They had drugged her, knowing that it was the worst possible thing they could do to her; give her what she hated the most, make her take it and feel it like she needed it. The drugs in her system were strong, and lethal, but they had yet to be labeled.

Sam snapped, just totally lost his cool.

He stood up out of his chair and stormed out of the interrogation room heading straight for the locker room and his old locker.

After getting into it with the lockers he left the locker room, his head down as he charged for the front door.

"Sam?". Andy saw him leave the locker room and called him, but he was either ignoring her, or hadn't heard her.

"Sam?".

Something was wrong, she could tell.

"Let him go". Jerry said as he walked up to her and Nash, McNally's face crumbling as she watched Sam leave her at the barn.

McNally. Even after marrying Sammy, she was still McNally around the barn, and to them all. Even her name tag read McNally.

"Jerry Barber! You promised" Traci hissed at him suddenly, making Andy look between the two of them.

"Just the ME's report. He deserves to know".

"Jerry you gave him the ME's report? He didn't need to know that!". Andy snapped at him in anger. She knew it was bad if they wouldn't let Sam see Sarah, how bad she didn't know until he left her here.

"Look I know okay, but he wanted to know. If it was him wouldn't you?" Jerry looked like he firmly believed in what he was saying, and Andy understood, she would want to know, but couldn't he have waited a while?

Traci gave Andy a ride home a few minutes later, ushering her out of the barn before she lost it completely.

Andy went inside, Sam's truck parked in the driveway making her feel better.

She promised to call Traci if she needed anything and just hoped that she wouldn't need to.

She found Sam downstairs in their old bedroom staring at the white walls, his face the palest she had ever seen it.

He didn't acknowledge her presence, just kept staring straight ahead.

Andy walked up behind him and enveloped him in a hug, her cheek laying down to rest on his back between his shoulder blades.

They stood there for the longest time in silence. Andy literally just being there for Sam.

Eventually he loosened her hands from around his waist, and held on to one as he tugged her upstairs.

She needed to eat, and they had skipped breakfast.

Sam led her to the kitchen but wouldn't face her, or look at her. He felt ashamed for leaving her at the barn.

Andy watched him rummage in the fridge before walking up to him, putting her hand on his shoulder and making him stand up out the bent position he had into the fridge.

"Don't shut me out Sam" she said mousey like as she pushed the door of the fridge closed.

He was doing it and he knew it. He just couldn't help it.

"Can we make a doctors appointment?" He said the random thought before he could think of anything else to say.

Andy nodded and stepped back, Sam needed space but he didn't know how to tell her that.

He turned away and grabbed cereal out of the cupboard before setting it down on the counter. Andy's hand found his, telling him that she could manage on her own, that he should leave her alone and go do whatever he needed too, to blow off steam.

Watching him walk away Andy felt like her heart was being ripped out repeatedly. She was doing the right thing, but it felt so wrong.

******Thanks for reading if you did! Let me know what you thought, maybe?**

**By the way how is Season 4 without Jerry? I'm having a hard time imagining it!**

**Have an awesome day**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	34. My Hero

**As always thanks for blowing me away! You guys are seriously amazing!**

**Thanks to the regulars & kelly2727! Welcome to the newbies!**

**Thanks again for the nominations for the Rookie Choice awards! Hope you're all casting your votes for your favs!**

**Chapter 34- My Hero. **

In the days that followed Sam withdrew completely. He just shut down. But Andy understood why.

He was grieving in his own way.

Sarah's body had been brought up to Toronto, a second postmortem done on her at Sam's request. But nothing new was found, it was all the same as before.

Sam was informed that her body was ready to be released, so he started on the funeral arrangements.

She was to receive a full honors burial because she had died in the line of duty, an eternal honor to her soul.

Sam was finding it hard to do this, arrange a funeral for someone who knew so much about, but so little at the same time.

Andy suggested that he forgo flowers, that donations be made to a local charity instead, so Sam went with it because honestly he had no idea what flowers his sister liked. The rest was up to him.

Choosing a coffin. Booking a church. Making arrangements for the wake and motorcade.

On the morning of the funeral, Sam went to retrieve Sarah's personal items from the ME's office, something he had been putting off for as long as possible until it couldn't be put off any longer.

Andy had waited in the truck while he went in, the small brown envelope shoved into his pocket before he made it through the door back out to Andy.

All that was left of Sarah, her entire life- the contents of a brown envelope no bigger than his hand.

The drive to the church was short, it was close even though it felt like it was dragging on forever.

Both Sam and Andy had their dress blues on, so did most of the people outside the church when they arrived, the massive waves of blue passing on their condolences to Sam and Andy when they stepped out of the truck.

Sam had elected to only have four pallbearers instead of the standard six, but Andy and Abigail were co-carrying so it evened it out.

He didn't want Andy to carry a heavy weight being pregnant, so she had accepted it when he told her of his plans. He could see the sparkle in her eyes when he asked her to carry Sarah's coffin, she was honored although it was such a sad affair. When he told her that she would rather be walking it than carrying it, he could tell that it didn't matter to her either way, she understood and was in no way offended.

In the two weeks it took before the day of the funeral Andy's stomach had formed the tiniest bump, Sam could feel it when he ran his hand over it. Whenever he did that, he couldn't help but smile, even if the day had been draining and excruciating, he smiled.

Andy had been putting off going to the doctor and he knew why, it was so that they could close this chapter of their lives first before moving on to a happier one. So he kept a firm eye on her, and generally just made sure that she ate right and got enough rest.

When the hearse arrived Sam had to look away, it was unbearable knowing why they were here.

Lifting Sarah's coffin out of the back of the hearse was the hardest thing he'd ever have to do, his knees began to shake and his breath caught in his throat.

Andy's hand on his as she stepped in behind him made the breath that got stuck untangle as it came out.

Lars was opposite Sam, Abigail behind him mirroring Andy's position. The kid didn't even look like himself.

He was torn because he never got the chance to ask Sarah if she would be okay with him proposing to Abigail, so up until now he hadn't. He was waiting to ask her personally, face to face rather than over the phone and now he'd never get the chance.

Behind Sam was Sarah's partner from when she had first joined a Division. The guy was a good man, and guided Sarah through her years before she left for UC the first time. Sam had a lot of respect for him.

Behind Lars was Sarah's best friend Hazel. Jerry and Oliver were taking turns co-carrying with her, so Sam knew she'd be okay.

When the time came for Sam to give his speech, he second guessed his decision to do this but knew he had too. He'd never forgive himself if he didn't.

Standing up in front of a sea of blue, Sam focused on Andy and let it come naturally.

"When I met Sarah, I thought she was an angel. She had this long blonde hair, and an innocent face, the sun shining behind her making her look like she had a halo. We weren't related, we were adopted, her family took me home one day, and made me a part of their lives forever". Sam was already choking up, and he'd only gone through the first few lines.

Pinching his eyes closed for a millisecond, Sam opened them to focus on Andy again who had her hand resting on her stomach without even knowing that she was doing it. It was always amazing to watch, and seemed to give Sam the strength he needed.

"Growing up with Sarah was like a roller-coaster ride, it was always exciting and you always felt loved. When she finished school and went to the academy she was so thrilled about getting a badge that it made me want one of my own, so I followed in her footsteps even though she hated the idea.

A few years ago, I had the only opportunity I've ever had to work closely with her. And there wasn't a second that I felt like she didn't have my back, or that we would be okay. She was the best partner that you could ever hope to have.

It was also the time I met my beautiful wife, Sarah falling in love with her just as much as I did. She loved Andy from the first time she spoke to her, like only a sister could. She protected Andy with everything she had in her too, obviously failing if I still married her".

A soft round of chuckles echoed through the church from a few seats, namely the ones that held Sam and Andy's closest friends that knew the story behind Sam's really bad joke. Sam couldn't openly talk about UC's and explain that Andy had been kidnapped and that it all worked out in the end, so he went with a line those closest would understand. Their chuckles caused a few people to gape in their direction, cutting the laughs off as quickly as they were heard.

"Sarah was just one of those people that everyone fell in love with the second she met them, her good heart and calm nature drawing people to her. All of you here today are proof of that.

Sarah loved passionately too. We found a stray once and she um, took him home, and raised him right, turning him into one of the finest men I've ever met and best cops with TPD because he wanted to follow in her footsteps too and make her proud. This she achieved in less than three years" Sam looked at Lars in the front row when he spoke of him, he wanted him to know how proud Sarah was of him.

"Her stray made her so proud, she'd look like the proudest mom you'd ever meet when she spoke of him.

To Sarah's friends, I can only thank you for sharing her life with her, through the good times and bad.

To Sarah's partner Stephan, you always had her back, thank you. You were her tormentor when you were her TO, but her idol when you were partnered with her.

And to Sarah... Um thank you... For being my best friend, and my driving force. My mentor and my Sister. My partner, and above all else, my hero".

Sam walked back to his seat then and sat down next to Andy who for the first time showed her own broken heart to him since Sarah had died.

Sarah's friend Hazel gave a short speech after Sam, followed by Stephan, they both had tall tales of Sarah Swarek, tales that made you want to laugh before it broke your heart.

When the service was done, Sarah's coffin was carried back to the hearse and driven to the cemetery a long string of cruisers and emergency service vehicles behind it.

Sam was driving his truck, and was given right of way to pull in behind the hearse when it pulled away.

At the grave side, things got tougher for everyone as the final homage was paid to Sarah the person rather than Sarah the cop.

Watching her coffin being lowered into the ground Andy felt Sam's hand begin to tremor in hers, so she held on tighter and willed the world to stop creating the pain inflicted on her family.

After that they all returned to a hall that had been filled with food and drinks for the wake, Sam sticking to himself in a corner between Jerry and Oliver.

The woman introduced as Hazel came over to Andy and Traci who were talking to Stephan and his wife, and introduced herself officially just as Sam stepped in behind Andy wanting to ask her if she was ready to leave.

"Hi, I'm Hazel, I actually used to date Sammy" the woman said with a smile in Andy's direction.

Andy had; had a long day, she was tired and irritable, her emotions and hormones taking strain. And then this woman walks up and says that, at his sisters wake?

Seriously?

Andy smiled sweetly before her mouth opened and the words came flying out. "Oh wow, so did I. But I married him".

It sent Sam into waves of laughter as the woman stared open mouthed at Andy while Sam tried to drag her away by the arm.

"Sorry, she pregnant, kind of hormonal" Sam said trying his best to hide his smirk.

Oliver and Jerry had joined Traci and just happened to hear what he had said, their jaw's hitting the floor as Sam finally got Andy to move her feet.

She was so mad right now.

Sam walked her out the side door, and let go of her arm before he just stopped and let out the loudest laugh Andy had ever heard.

She stopped walking and turned around to face him, her hands on her hips, her face clouded in confusion.

"I'm sorry, that's just the worst attempt at jealousy I've ever seen".

Andy scowled at him in return."Are you laughing at me Sam?"

"Nope"

"You are?". Andy turned around and stomped off.

Sam caught up with her a few feet from the truck and rounded her to cut her off.

"Hey, just stop a second. One; I was twelve, and it was for something like five days, I can't really remember. Two; you are feisty when you're jealous".

"I'm not jealous".

Sam nodded in agreement because if he didn't, he'd be sleeping on the couch tonight instead of next to her.

"Have I said thank you, for this? For being there?" The conversation turned to serious as Sam swerved the topic back to present time.

Over the two weeks it got to get Sarah's body home, wait the second postmortem out, and put the funeral together Andy had been with him every step of the way, even when he was shutting down and withdrawn. She refused to be pushed away and kept coming back again and again more resilient than the last time. It was her stubborn streak at it's best.

"Sam, you don't have to, it's what I do".

"I do, I wouldn't have done this without you, I wouldn't have gotten through this if it wasn't for you".

Andy tried to smile at him, but it wouldn't come. In some ways she knew that he was right. He really wouldn't have.

Sam brushed his nose against hers in the most intimate of ways as he whispered a soft thank you across her cheek.

It was time to go home, and try find some normality now that the final goodbyes had been said.

But still, that nagging feeling that things weren't right clutched his gut, telling him that something wasn't right.

*******Thanks for reading! Hope you'll check in with another awesome review & let me know what you think?**

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	35. Happiness Is

**Wow you guys have been amazing & continue to blow me away! Thank you all!**

**Chapter 35- Happiness IS. **

Andy had scheduled a doctors appointment for two days after Sarah's funeral, and told Sam but didn't ask him if he was coming with her. She knew that it was risky putting it off for so long, but she just didn't have it in herself to complicate their lives more right now.

She had a shift that morning but Frank was letting her come in a little later than usual, he understood her need to do this now that things could find a sense of normality.

She found Sam ready and waiting to leave when she got out of bed, the first real signs of his enthusiasm starting to show.

Before now she had completely accepted that there were more urgent matters that needed Sam's attention; and hers, but even then he'd been attentive. He made sure that she ate, ran her long hot bathes and stopped all unhealthy food groups from entering her body.

They made it to the doctors office, Sam clinging to her hand all the way over, until she shook it off and gave him a look. She was nervous, and moody and Sam being clingy wasn't working for her this morning.

She had the regular checkup and a sonar, the doctor telling them that all was just fine and that she was seven to eight weeks pregnant. They heard the heartbeat and Sam smiled the biggest smile she had ever seen him wear.

The doctor gave them the run down of do's and don't's as well as the expected ups and downs and then they left with Sam staring at the tiny pictures the doctor had printed for them.

On the way out, Sam actually stopped and tried to make out what he was looking at when Andy noticed that he had the picture upside down. She whipped it out of his hand, turned it around and handed it back to him wearing a very amused smile.

They received heaps of congratulations from their friends and well wishes their baby being dubbed "Baby Fifteen" and "Baby Blue-Blood" by their friends.

As weeks passed Sam found it easier to accept that Sarah was gone and still kept tabs on her case through Jerry. They had no leads, and no clues, the guys Sarah was working were in police custody at the time she died. They had been arrested at a traffic stop and found in possession of cash and a trunk full of narcotics.

Nothing made sense.

Lars was doing well, he had accepted Sarah's death and was getting back to being himself.

Sarah's solicitor had called Sam and asked for a meeting, but Sam had a heavy workload so he kept postponing it until the solicitor offered to come to his office four weeks after Sarah's funeral. He had requested that Lars and Andy be there too, but Andy had a doctors appointment so it was just Lars and Sam.

And Sam was not happy about missing Andy's second doctors appointment, but they really didn't have a choice.

Sam found the middle-aged man waiting for him on time, his glasses hanging off the end of his nose.

When the man had coffee and found a seat at Sam's cluttered desk he began reading Sarah's will.

She left her house in St Catherines to Lars and a college fund for Alicia, and another under Lars' surname with the note; for my next grandbaby. The solicitor did not appreciate having to say that.

She left a large cash amount to Lars and Abigail to be paid out monthly under Sam's supervision as well as what she called 'The wedding fund', and a message to Lars saying that he should make an honest woman out of Abigail and marry her already.

To Sam and Andy, she left the house they lived in and reminded him of what she had said when she gave it to him. She left two college funds under the name of Swarek and told Sam that no matter what, she'd always be waiting for her nieces and nephews.

She left them a large amount of cash too, Sam having no idea why. She asked for her jewelry to be taken from her lockbox and given to Andy, and a few other odds and ends that Sam knew came from her birth parents.

Sam gave the solicitor the names of a few charities and told him to split his and Andy's cash inheritance between them. They really didn't need the cash, so he decided to put it where it would be well used. Andy had mentioned that it was a good idea when Sam asked her what she thought when he made the appointment with the solicitor. She had loved the fact that even though Sarah was gone, she was helping people with the donations to the charities.

The oldish man smiled and said "She said you'd say that" before shaking Sam's hand as he stood up to leave.

Sam asked him when Sarah had said that, the man's reply had been a date a few days after Damian died.

She knew she was going back under, even before she left so she made sure that everything was in place, because she knew that she wasn't coming home.

She was chasing someone or something, and Sam still hadn't figured it out.

More weeks passed, Andy's growing stomach the most fascinating thing to Sam ever. He had this indescribable need to touch it, and talk to it and kiss it- he never wanted it to stop.

Andy's moods were better, the only thing she found frustrating was the fact that they still didn't know what the baby was. Everytime she had a sonar, the baby had it's legs closed and the doctor wasn't guessing.

Lars had finally proposed to Abigail and she said yes, and he paid Andy a large lump sum of money as back rent for letting them stay in her apartment. They had been saving up their monthly installments from Sarah to do it. Andy took the money and handed it too Sam telling him to put it into the trust funds Sarah had set up for Lars' kids. Weird how it felt so right to call Alicia Lars'. But it just sounded so right.

Sarah's house in St Catherines stood empty, Lars and Abigail occasionally spending a weekend down there, but the rest of the time it stood vacant.

...

Andy was six months pregnant when Lars and Abigail got married. They had a service at a church, went out to dinner at an expensive restaurant and invested the rest of the money that they would have spent on a lavish wedding. It was only Sam and Andy, and them along with the memory of Sarah and her blessing from the grave.

Life was slowly moving forwards, Abigail was taking a few night classes, a wedding gift from Andy who looked after Alicia if Lars was on shift, and things were getting easier for everyone.

Sarah's death had left holes in their lives that would never be filled but they were adapting and moving forwards, Sarah never being forgotten.

It was an ordinary day at work for Andy stuck behind the front desk with her rounding stomach. But she wasn't complaining, even though she was getting 'fatter', she was loving every minute of it.

Shift was quiet, not much happening other than a few texts from Sam asking her what she wanted for dinner and how she was doing.

It was close to time for the shifts to change Andy more than ready to go home.

Her phone rang, Abigail's name lighting up the screen. She had a class tonight, so Andy had Alicia because Lars was going to get home after Abigail left, so they would drop Alicia off at the barn and pick her up from Andy when Lars knocked off. That was the thing about being pregnant, you got shorter shifts when your doctor told you that you needed too take it easy.

"Hello" Andy grinned into the phone, Alicia often called her to tell the baby that they were leaving home and she'd see it soon. She just loved the idea of a baby coming into their lives.

"Andy?". It sounded like her former neighbour, Mr O'Brien.

He had lived next to her in the building where her condo was, and still lived there now.

"Hello?" Andy started waving at Nick who came into the barn with a cuffed hooker. He handed the woman to his new TO and approached Andy who had scribbled her condo's address down and the word GO.

He was out the door in an instant.

"Mr O'Brien? Is everything okay? Where's Abigail?". She was really trying not to panic.

"Andy, she's okay, just shaken up. A guy attacked her in your apartment, but I scared him off".

Andy's blood ran cold.

"Mr O'Brien, where's her little girl?".

"She's okay too, she screamed and we came. She's with Mrs O'Brien waiting for you". Andy let out a strangled breath.

"Thank you Mr O'Brien. My friend Nick is on his way he's a cop too. I'll call Sam and Lars". Andy said goodbye and called Sam for him to go get Lars. He was on loan to Twenty-Seven and she didn't want him having an accident on the way home because his nerves were shot.

Andy found Frank after shoving a passing uniform in behind the front desk and told him what happened. He told her to just leave in her uniform and that a cruiser would drive her over. Sam wasn't letting her drive now either, which meant that no-one was.

Andy arrived at the same time that Lars and Sam did, Lars running into the building and Sam following when she waved him off. It would take her a while to navigate the stairs slowly.

She found them in the lounge, Abigail crying hysterically, Lars holding on to Alicia who he must have reclaimed from the neighbors.

Uniforms were crawling all over the place, Sam eventually asking Abigail if she was okay to pack a bag for them for the night.

Lars went with her to get a few things, Andy noticing the large kitchen knife in the evidence bag on the table.

"She stabbed him" Sam said wearing a satisfied smile like he was proud of Abigail for retaliating. He was against violence, but when it came to family and what they needed to do, he believed in defending yourself.

They all went back to Sam and Andy's, Abigail still visibly shaken.

Oliver had been on scene too, so he'd taken her statement, Sam hearing it when she said that the guy asked her where the money was, and she told him that she didn't know what he was talking about. She had stabbed him when he tried to strangle her.

She had added that she thought the guy was deranged or that it was a case of mistaken identity, but Sam wasn't sure. Things didn't add up.

Sam called ahead to the lab and told them what was coming in. He asked for a rush on the DNA sample that they'd pull from the blood on the knife, he was going with his gut.

After dinner, Abigail fell asleep on the couch holding Alicia who was sleeping too. The scare had drained and exhausted her. And Andy too.

She was yawning when she watched Lars move Alicia from her mothers lap and carried her to bed.

"You too" Sam said helping Andy up.

Andy tried to make sense of the attack on Abigail, but it was totally random. The guy had knocked on the door and when she opened it he had rammed his way in. She had screamed for Alicia to hide and the guy had grabbed her and walked her through the apartment by her hair demanding to know where the money was.

Sam watched Andy overthink it, before telling her to leave it to the morning and to get some sleep.

Andy woke up the next morning and found that she was the last one up. She was just so tired these days, but it was worth every yawn and cramp and mood swing.

They had coffee together, Sam had relented and allowed Andy to have decaf, before they all parted ways and resumed their daily lives.

Andy only had a week left of shifts before she would be going on maternity leave. The doctor thought it best because she was so tired and had a stressful job.

She was looking forward to it, spending time getting everything ready for the new arrival.

The only problem was; they still didn't have a clue as to the baby's gender. Every single sonar she had over the months had the doctor looking then shrugging, the baby just didn't want them to know.

Sam and Andy had been playing around with names for boys and girls, ranging from Noah to Marcy, even a Brett and Anna-Claire being considered.

They just couldn't decide.

Sam had tried to settle Andy's nerves about it by saying the only thing he could think of "When we see the baby, we'll know". And it worked, Andy believed that they truly would.

They had bought a collection of baby stuff, sticking to whites, yellows, oranges and greens. Pale blues were there too, Andy figuring that Sam was silently hoping for a boy. But he would be a girl daddy, she just knew it. The way he looked after Sarah, and then her when she came into his life- he was definitely a girl daddy.

Traci and Gail had arranged a baby shower for Andy last saturday, and it had been a fun filled day that had her cursing her round stomach.

But it was the things that memories were made of, and that was all that mattered.

Andy had received countless gifts for the baby, and a few 'pamper presents' for herself too, making her wonder of she would ever fit into the tiny underwear that she was forced to hold up and have Traci take a photograph of.

She didn't really have any baby fat, but she knew that it was Traci's way of trying to make her feel better when she had the baby- sexy underwear would usually do that.

Andy was excited about getting everything sorted out when she had the time, she could just see Alicia helping her decorate the nursery too.

The only thought that ever saddened Andy was, that Sarah would never get to meet her niece or nephew.

********as always, thanks for reading! Let me know if you're still here & enjoying in another awesome review?**

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	36. Building Puzzles

**Hello again! Thank you all so much for the awesome response to this! Never imagined it would be so well received- so um, keep it up?**

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**Here's more...**

**Chapter 36- Building Puzzles. **

Sam cornered Jerry in the hallway when they passed each other, just to ask if there was any new developments with Sarah's case.

It became a ritual, something he had done often, and it would stay that way- he'd never grow tired of asking. Whenever Jerry was here at Guns and Gangs, he'd ask. If he saw Jerry at the barn, or the Penny or even at his own house on a poker night, Sam would ask him.

He knew even before asking that Jerry's answer would be the same "No".

And it was.

Again.

It had been months since her death, and they were no closer to finding anything than they had been when Sarah first went missing.

Sam walked away from Jerry after thanking him again, feeling like there was nothing he could do to stop his sister from becoming a number- a cold case file, when she deserved so much more. When he still needed closure.

Seated at his desk, Sam tried to immerse himself in his work, but today was harder than most had been. It was just one of the days that he allowed the guilt and sorrow to consume him.

His phone rang, his mind pulled from sad thoughts to concentrate on his reactions as he answered after seeing that it was Phillip from the labs.

"Swarek"

"Hey Sammy, got your results. It matches a guy named Marco Sylvano. Small time dealer, assault, armed robbery, and a string of small time offenses. A real piece of work".

"Thanks Phil" Sam said hanging up.

Sylvano.

The name rang a bell, but Sam couldn't place it, and it wasn't a common name.

Andy's feet were tired even though she hadn't been on them at all really today.

She spent her shift mostly sitting, but doing what she could to keep busy.

She thought, she doodled on paper, she sent Sam a string of smiley faces for no reason.

She'd had a good day.

Sam was still at a crime scene when Andy's shift was over, but he had called and told her that Noelle would take her home instead of her having to wait around the barn for him to come and get her.

That was the thing about his office being somewhere else, she didn't get to see him on shift.

But it was probably good for their relationship. Too much of a good thing could be a really bad thing.

He had another UC go missing and this one was one that he was working on himself. He hadn't hidden it from her, that he was out in the streets instead of his office and she appreciated the fact that he was honest about it, but she still worried about him.

Arriving home, Andy started dinner and grabbed a load of laundry to stick in the washer while she waited to hear from Sam.

She went and had a long soak in the tub and got dressed before going downstairs to the kitchen to smell that dinner was just about ready. It made her stomach rumble. The baby had a good appetite, but Andy never ate for two as everyone always joked- she was only eating for one and a quarter.

Moving into the laundry room Andy stopped when she stepped into a puddle of water, coming straight from the washing machine. The water was seeping out rapidly, the entire floor under a thin layer of the clear liquid.

Great.

Grabbing towels Andy threw them down on the waterlogged floor before she dared to tread over them cautiously in a bid to reach the leaking machine.

She hit the killswitch and turned it off, closed the taps and started mopping up the mess.

She was still busy doing just that when Sam arrived home a while later, his face showing that he was less than impressed when he found her on her knees trying to dry the water up that had filled the gap between the machine and the cupboard next to it.

"It wasn't me" Andy said holding out her hand so that Sam could help her up.

"So it was the machine?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

Andy nodded and slapped Sam's arm playfully before wiggling her eyebrows and telling him "It's full of laundry".

Andy left Sam to check the machine while she went back upstairs and started finishing dinner off.

Twenty minutes later, Sam emerged into the kitchen his hand holding something.

"Did you find him?". Andy was hesitant to ask about the missing UC, but she knew that the sooner they spoke about it, the sooner it wouldn't intrude in their home.

"Um, yeah. He got loaded and went home, to his real house". Sam said shaking his head. Some people just shouldn't be put under. But the guy had made an honest mistake after he spent the previous night partying it up with his mark, and went home to his cop house rather than his cover apartment.

"Fix the washer?" Andy said between bites of her celery stick. She had this thing for celery later, and ate it with every meal. Or just walked around munching on it. Before she had fallen pregnant she wouldn't touch the stuff, but seeing as she craved it now she ate it willingly.

"Yeah, about that. I didn't know it eats flash drives" Sam said holding one up.

Andy dropped the celery stick, her face paling. She had so forgotten that Frank gave it to her, what if it was important? She was in so much trouble right now.

"Wow, I totally forgot about that. I think I left it in my pocket after Frank gave it to me to bring to you".

She had the knack of forgetting things lately, it was termed 'pregnancy brains'.

"Frank gave you this flash drive? This specific one?". Sam's face turned to stone as he asked her the question, Andy nodding.

"The one Sarah mailed to him at the barn before she went missing?".

That caused Andy to choke.

"What?" She squeaked out. "Sam, he didn't tell me that".

"It's okay, where's your laptop?" Sam had already left the kitchen before she could answer.

Right now, she felt worse than she ever had.

Taking a calming breath Andy went looking for Sam and found him sitting on their bed with her laptop open on his lap, the flash drive already plugged in.

"Sam?".

He looked up at her, his face showing no signs of the misery or anger she was expecting.

Sam tilted his head to the side telling her that he wanted her to sit down next to him, so she crossed the room and did just that.

"I don't get this?" Sam said turning the laptop so that she could see the screen.

There were icons filling the screen but each one Sam opened gave random characters across the screen.

"She encrypted and locked the files, it won't work on here Sam". Andy said shaking her head.

Sam disconnected the flash drive, and unplugged it. He set the laptop down next to himself, stood up, kissed Andy's forehead and whispered "I've gotta go" before leaving.

Andy knew that he would if it had anything to do with Sarah, and she wasn't expecting anything less.

"There goes your daddy again, he's going to go be a hero and take down the bad guys" Andy said smiling at her stomach while her hand ran over it.

She wanted this baby to know just why she loved its daddy so much.

Sam found Phillip waiting for him after calling him and asking him to help. Sam was meeting him at the lab, and he had arranged for the guys from IT to be ready and waiting.

Jerry was there too.

Sam and Jerry had coffee while they waited, the hours flowing into night as the guys worked on the flash drive.

It took a while, but they eventually hacked Sarah's encryption and got the files to show as regular documents.

And it was all there.

What she was working on, names of people that were involved.

Everything.

One name on the list stood out, Sylvano.

Scrolling down to the bottom of the list Sam froze when the final piece of the puzzle slipped into place and everything came together.

Elliot Sylvano.

Son of a bitch! It had been there the entire time and Sam had been missing it.

This also meant that Elliot knew all about them. Lars, and him. Their families.

Grabbing his phone, Sam made the first call, Lars answering on the first ring.

"Sir is Andy okay?".

Typical, the kids first thought would be about his pregnant wife.

"Yeah, she's perfect. I um, I need you to pack a bag for a couple of days and go to the barn. Ask for Jerry, and only Jerry".

Sam was trying to keep his cool, keep his tone calm and collected but he knew that the kid would pick up on his underlying panic even though he was trying to suppress it.

"Sir?".

"Lars, just get the girls, pack a bag and go see Jerry. I need you guys to get out of the house now, Elliot's coming after you".

Sam pinched the bridge of his nose when he said that. They had all been through tough times, and judging by the strangled breath filtering into his ear right now, the kid understood that things were about to get worse.

He said goodbye after promising to call Lars in a few hours, then Sam called Oliver and asked him to go to his house with another cop of his choice and to wait for him to get home.

Calling Oliver in the middle of the night was something Sam had always dreaded actually doing,but he knew that Oliver would be there no matter what the reason was behind the call.

Oliver asked Sam if Nick Collins would be okay, and Sam had agreed because they were playing poker together with a few guys from Twenty-Seven. Besides Collins was a good guy, he'd had Andy's back a few times when she had been his TO and she ran into trouble. Sam respected and trusted Collins for that.

Next Sam called Andy trying to figure out how not to scare her before anyone got there. But calling was the better option- having cops show up at your door in the middle of the night when your cop husband wasn't home could send you into early labor.

"Hey you okay?" Andy whispered in his ear after a few rings.

'Yeah, good. Are you in bed?".

Andy giggled, he knew her too well. She had fallen sleep on the couch waiting for him.

"Figures" Sam chuckled.

"Can you um, Oliver's coming over can you turn some lights on and um make sure you're close to the lockbox?". He knew that by saying that she'd know that something was wrong. The only thing they kept in the lockbox were guns and spare magazines for said guns.

"Sam, what's wrong?".

"Nothing Andy. Just a precaution".

"Sam, what was on the flash drive?".

Sam didn't say anything other than "uh" before keeping quiet.

"Sam, you're scaring me and right now is not a good time for that so what was on the flash drive?".

He could hear her moving about, he could picture her turning lights on and checking that the doors and windows were locked, that the alarm was still on.

"Sam! Wait, Oliver's here".

What? He'd only spoken to Oliver minutes ago, Oliver would never have made it to his house in so little time. Not unless...

"Andy get out of the house" Sam yelled into the phone before running towards the door of the lab, Jerry hot on his heels yelling into his own phone.

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	37. When The Truth Scares You

**As always big thank you for all of your awesomeness! **

**Thanks to the regulars & kelly2727!**

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**Chapter 37- When The Truth Scares You. **

"Andy?". She was too quiet.

"Sam? Who is it. What's going on?".

Sam could hear the murmur in her voice as it trembled. She was scared and he wasn't helping by not telling her anything.

"Andy get out of the house take a gun, a magazine and the phone and go. Please?".

Andy could hear car doors closing through the phone, a buzz of activity around Sam.

"Okay".

She could also tell that he was scared too.

Andy kept the call connected and put the phone into her pocket while she unlocked the lockbox, took out Sam's gun and a full magazine that she shoved into her other pocket.

She listened for sounds around the house but didn't hear anything.

The doorbell ringing made her jump, a soft squeak filtering out before she could stop it.

"No, don't answer the door" Sam was yelling into the phone hoping that she was listening.

"Andy!".

At the sound of her voice, Andy froze. She was about to run out of the house because Gail was here?

Moving to the door Andy pulled her phone out of her pocket and told Sam that it was Gail, a relieved sigh filling her ear.

"...Nick I know okay, what do you want me to do? If she's sleeping and I kick the door down..."

Andy stood just inside the lounge listening to Gail yell at Nick over the phone. It made her giggle. The two made a good pair, each balancing the other out. Nick warmed Gail up, and she seemed to keep him calm.

"Nick sent her Sam. Have you dispatched the entire division to our house?". Andy was mad now, her voice low but potent in Sam's ear. He could also hear her frustration, she was in the dark about the circumstances and she didn't like not knowing anything.

The doorbell rang again and made Andy jump; again, but this time she opened the door to see Gail hang up on Nick.

"See you later Sam" Andy said hanging up. "Hi" she said addressing Gail.

Gail came inside and looked around as though she was expecting something to be wrong. "You okay?".

Andy nodded. She was mad as hell right now, but she was okay.

"Um, Nick called, Sam thought you might be in trouble? I was closer". Gail explained her presence on Andy's doorstep.

"Nope, I'm fine" Andy sighed out.

"Do you mind" Gail said looking at Sam's gun still clutched in Andy's hand.

A pregnant woman holding a loaded gun with the safety off probably wasn't her idea of a happy welcome.

"Yeah, right sorry" Andy walked away and went to put the gun back in the lockbox.

Gail hovered in the kitchen waiting for Andy to come back. She made herself coffee but didn't make anything for Andy, she didn't know what she wanted anyway.

"So, they sent you?" Andy said finding her way back to Gail who nodded and sipped her coffee.

"Yup, they're just worried about you Andy" Gail tried to find her passive nature. Andy had been through so much over the last few months that she was trying to keep the bad memories from stirring up.

"I noticed. But keeping me in the dark isn't going to help".

"I know. If I knew anything I'd tell you, but I don't. Nick called and asked me where I was. Sam is freaking out and asked Oliver to come over until he got home".

"Yeah I figured that" Andy said even though she didn't mean for it to sound so sarcastic.

"Sorry" she added sheepishly.

"I get it Andy. But put yourself is Sam's shoes, whatever the situation is, he's just worried about you".

Andy was chewing on her bottom lip, Gail was right. Sam wouldn't just freak out over nothing, and he had a really good reason to worry about her if something was wrong. It wasn't just about her anymore.

"I think it's about Sarah" Andy said looking away.

Oliver arrived a short while later with Nick, Andy's dark, quiet house coming to life with late night visitors.

When Sam made it home he found Andy sleeping on the couch, the others keeping watch over her as they shared coffee in the kitchen where they had clear sight of Andy through the open plan kitchen island that Sam had recently put in.

"Thanks Man" Sam said when Oliver met him halfway and pointed out to Andy.

"We've always got your back". Oliver said. Sam had helped him out a few times and he was more than willing to repay the favors.

That's what friends did.

Jerry edged inside the doorway looking pleased to find the Swarek household intact and safe, Sam's reaction to someone at his house while Andy was home alone had him a little worried for a while.

"Need us to stay?" Collins asked as Peck hopped down from her comfortable seat on Sam's newly installed marble counter top.

"Nope but thanks for you know". Sam waived his hand around, he still hadn't figured out how to master the art of conversation with people that didn't know him very well.

"Okay, well call us if you need us" Peck said as she tugged Collins out of Sam and Andy's front door. Oliver and Jerry following deep in conversation.

Sam locked up behind them, and then took a moment to watch Andy look peaceful as she lay in slumber.

Sam bent down next to her, his fingertips trailing over her cheek as she stirred slightly at his touch. When it registered that he was home, her eyes flew open and she smiled his way as she said "Hi".

"Hi".

Sam would never grow tired of watching her wake up.

Without warning Andy sat up straight before launching herself at Sam, her arm's wrapping around his neck as she pulled him closer.

"Don't ever do that again Sam". She said as she tucked her face into his shoulder.

"I won't". He knew that he had scared her, he could hear it in her voice when she was living the nightmare, and he didn't want to do it again but knew that he would have to.

"Talk to me".

See, she was waiting for him to do just that.

Andy pulled away and Sam sat down next to her taking a long breath before saying anything.

Andy was guessing that it had something to do with Sarah. She could tell by how Sam had changed to Brother mode, cop mode being checked out the second she confirmed that the flash was the one from Sarah.

"The DNA on Abigail's kitchen knife matches a Sylvano. Elliot's younger brother by the looks of things".

"Elliot? Teddy-bear Elliot?". Andy showed her shock. "What does he have to do with this?"

"I have no idea, but Sarah was chasing him when she went under. Her flash had files and files of lists, dates, money transfers. I just haven't pieced how it all fits together yet". Sam's voice told of his tiredness, but it held an underlying tone that spoke volumes about his relief at finding a bit of hope at catching whoever killed Sarah.

"But he was in jail so it doesn't make sense".

"I know. But I'm going to find out in the morning".

Andy sensed that Sam wasn't telling her everything, so she crossed her arms and gave him the look that screamed spill while she waited. There was definitely more.

"I sent Lars to a safehouse with the girls for a while, the attack on Abigail was enough to get them in".

And then Andy knew what was coming next.

She stood up, with a struggle but eventually managed. She turned to face Sam who had his eyes closed as she looked down at him and scowled.

"No".

Andy walked away, not really knowing where she was going. She just needed to go, now.

"Andy..."

"No Sam, you're not sending me away too, not now".

"Andy, what if they come after you and I'm not here?".

Andy could hear the agony in Sam's voice, but didn't he understand that she was not going to go anywhere if it meant that there was the chance that she would have this baby without him being there.

"Sam, we have four guns in the house, and I have been trained to use all of them, by you. I don't want to go..."

She couldn't even finish saying that.

"Just no okay?".

"Andy, I... What if they take you? It's not just you I'm thinking about here". Sam cast his eyes down to her stomach, this was about more than just them now.

"No, I'm sorry Sam. But this is about me making this decision because of this baby. How can I bring a child into the world when I'm not even sure that you'll be there to watch it grow up? Or when I have to live looking over my shoulder, living in fear? No I won't do that again Sam, the first time was enough".

Sam stared at Andy as a plague of memories washed over her from when they first met, and how she had lived with so much fear for weeks that it altered her forever.

"Andy, I can't loose you too. Or the baby, I won't...".

"Then don't make me go Sam. Don't make me?". Andy was shaking her head, her eyes heavily misted over with sparkling tears as she clamped her teeth down on her bottom lip to hold them in.

Sam didn't answer, he just closed the space between them and wrapped her up in a hug, her stomach pressed up against his as his arm's encircled her. He loved the feeling of that, he was really going to miss it when the baby came into the world.

It was well into the morning hours when they finally made it into bed.

Andy waited for Sam to get out of the shower before she got comfortable in their bed.

When she fell asleep with her head on his shoulder, Sam was glad that he had called Frank and told him the situation and then called him again after he got home to fill him in that everything was okay, but Andy wouldn't be at work in the morning.

Frank understood, so he told Sam that Andy should rather take her last few shifts off and Sam agreed wholeheartedly. She needed her rest and only had three shifts left anyway.

She would probably wake up and be mad at him for agreeing to it, but it was the best for her under the circumstances.

She had been so mad with him on the phone earlier, but when he got home she had let her anger flare into relief and happiness when she saw him.

Eventually falling asleep, Sam kept one arm wrapped around Andy, the world fading away behind closed eyelids.

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	38. Everything I Do

**As always, thank you all for your awesomeness! Thanks to the regulars & kelly2727! Welcome to all the newbies!**

**Chapter 38-Everything I Do. **

As expected Andy was a little mad about being pulled from her shifts, but Sam saw her cool off the minute the baby started kicking. He could tell that it was happening when her face got wrapped up in a far away look, the one where her eyes sparkled and she just started smiling.

That was his favorite part of the day- when the baby was active and he got to put his hand on Andy's stomach and feel the baby kick against it.

He had even made a comment that it was a boy, because he had a goal scoring kick. Andy kicked him in the shin and then stared at him, daring him to say that again. It was the only time he ever said it.

Sam had been hovering over the last few days, and if it wasn't him then it was someone else.

There was always someone at their house with her, since Sam had been scared to death he wasn't taking any risks.

He had attempted to see Elliot the morning after he found Sarah's flash drive, but he was refused entry because the prison was under lockdown, it was under quarantine with some kind of stomach virus that had inmates and guards really rather sick.

It was frustrating for Sam, to know that you were this close but yet so far away from knowing the truth, knowing what really happened.

Jerry had the flash drive converted and printed, the investigation into Sarah's death heating up while other things came to light.

Andy was progressing with the nursery, she spent a little bit of time in there everyday over the next six weeks, whoever was with her always more than willing to help out.

Sam still hadn't been able to see Elliot by then, and his little brother; Marco seemed to have disappeared off the face of the earth. They had a APB out on him since he attacked Abigail, but he was just gone. Vanished into thin air.

They had combed hospitals and clinics for stab wound victims, but even that deadpanned into zero.

A week later Sam got a call from the prison warden telling him that he had the go-ahead to visit an inmate, Sam had hounded the guy until he swore that the minute the quarantine was over he would call Sam personally.

Andy had another two weeks to go until her due date, but things were good. She wasn't as tired anymore now that she was at home full time. Whoever was on guard duty with her always helped, with laundry, nursery decorating, and any other mundane chores that needed to be done.

Sam had told her that he was going to see Elliot today, and her nerves had been on edge since he left for work this morning.

The baby felt it too, extra activity filling her stomach as the day stretched into the afternoon and then into early evening.

The baby, funny how that it was still known as that considering that it still blatantly refused to reveal its gender.

Sam and Andy had given up hope that they would find out what it was before it arrived, so they merely accepted the fact.

Even though Andy was on edge because Sam was going to see the person that they suspected to be responsible for Sarah's death, she understood completely why he was going.

When he sat her down and told her, she could tell that she was the reason that he was going.

It wasn't to lay Sarah too rest, it was to keep her and her unborn baby safe; until it ended, they wouldn't be safe. Sam was doing what he could to protect his family, and as Andy kissed him goodbye she knew that Sam wouldn't rest until above all else- they were safe.

Gail was with her today, she said she'd stay until Sam got home even if it meant that she had to sleep over.

Oliver had some days, with Traci sharing the day shifts. They had kids, so it was understandable.

Nick took nights if Sam was late, Dov too. Even Frank once or twice.

The rest of the time it was Sam.

Sam kept Lars hidden the whole time, not even telling Andy where they were, but he told Andy everyday that they were okay, and carried messages back to her from Alicia.

After Andy and Gail had dinner, Andy told her that she was going for a nap. The stress of the day had worn her out while she waited for Sam to let her know how it went with Elliot.

Sam had Nash with him, Frank's idea of having some calm with him.

They were in the visitors room, Sam sitting in a hard plastic chair while he stared through the glass waiting for Elliot to take his seat on the other side. Nash was aimlessly milling around, blending into the background like she was supposed too. If this was going to work then she had too.

Last Sam had heard Elliot was in the minimum security wing of inmates, but a stabbing had changed that. After serving time in solitude, he was transferred to maximum security to be kept safe. Weird how the system protected inmates in prisons.

When Elliot sat down, he had a sickening smile across his face as if he was still convinced that he was playing Sam.

When Elliot picked up his telephone, Sam did the same after pinching his eyes closed and picturing images of Andy. It was the only thing he could think of doing right now to hold himself together.

"Sammy, been a long time man. You good?".

The friendliness in Elliot's voice made Sam's stomach clench and churn.

"Hey man, I'm good. How's life inside?". That's it, just keep faking it.

"Good man good. I'm up for parole, so life's better"

What? He was up for parole on a twenty-five year sentence? Impossible.

"Yeah, so who'd you do to get that?".

"Some info goes a long way Sammy, you should know that".

Again with the sadistic smile. He was toying with Sam, playing with him.

"Yeah, it does. Especially when it's filed away, and you can't find it right Elliot?".

Sam was done, so he cut the crap and baited Elliot. He didn't have all day to sit here, and his ear piece was starting to get on his nerves.

Another reason Nash was here. She was holding the recording device for his ear piece in her purse, it only had a forty-foot range so it had to be in the room with him. Every single word that Elliot said into his ear through his speaker telephone was being recorded, all he needed was for the right words to come out. It took a lot of work to get the DA to agree to this, to allow them to bait Elliot, but she wasn't thrilled when she saw the evidence on Sarah's flash after her had flipped on his cell mate and traded some heavy info for a get out of jail early card.

"The kid gave the money to the DA" Sam said, Elliot's face creasing when Sam just came out and said it.

"Then he has balls".

"So why go after his girl, doesn't your brother have a pair? He could have gone after Lars, but instead he goes after a little girl?". Sam let the words end on a light chuckle, like he found it un-manly behavior.

That drew a deep scowl from Elliot. He didn't like people messing with his little brother.

"The bitch is dead Sammy, she sliced him bad".

"But not bad enough. He's still breathing isn't he? How'd he look after Sarah stuck it to him?".

Sam hit a nerve when he said that. A nerve that pained from the top of his own head right through to his little toe. It hit one for Elliot too.

Sarah had done some damage obviously.

"Do not say her name Sammy".

"Why Elliot? Did she break your heart or break your little brothers face when she punched him? She was so small so it must be bad for a guy his size to admit that a woman knocked him on his ass, and a that she was a cop".

Sam watched Elliot's face turn red as he leaned towards the glass, giving Sam a glare that said if the glass wasn't there, he'd try and rip his head off now.

"That whore took everything from me Sammy. Twenty years of my life, my money. My friendship with Damian over the second she walked out that bar with us. Even my insurance plan for when I get out"

That's what this was about? A jealous friend and money?

"So you had Marco kill her?"

"She suffered Sammy. He made her pay for what she did, made her cry and scream for help but you never came. She begged for her life, but in the end I own that. I took that away for what she did, and soon you'll know the pain I felt when I had everything taken away from me. Soon Sammy".

One thought crashed through Sam's mind when Elliot made that promise- Andy.

She was his everything.

"You will suffer too" Elliot added as Sam's face gave away that he knew what he was saying.

"Son of a bitch" Sam yelled and drooped the phone, his hand swinging out to punch the glass between the two of them, the sound echoing through the room as the glass spiraled into a spiders web of cracks but still held itself together.

Armed guards came over and they began removing Elliot from the room on the other side of the glass as more began to clear the room they were in. Elliot had his head thrown back as he was dragged away, a silent laugh only being seen.

Sam ripped the ear piece out of his ear and tossed it onto the counter for Elliot to see before he fled to find Nash and get to his phone that had to be left in the truck.

Driven by fear Sam raced through the prison gates and out into the parking lot, Nash struggling to keep up with him. When he sprinted past her all he had said was "They're going after Andy".

Gail checked on Andy before going back downstairs and getting another coffee.

Andy was still sound asleep, so she called Nick to ask if he had heard from Sam or Traci.

Andy was dreaming.

She was seeing images of Sarah, smiling at her before she saw her walk away and crook a finger at her like she wanted her to follow.

Ever since Sam had found Sarah's flash drive, she had been made to keep her gun under her pillow for when she went to sleep. Her dream made her hand shift out, the cold metal streaking across her skin as she resumed a comfortable position and tried to wake herself up.

She didn't want to follow Sarah.

Gail was listening to Nick revise over some stupid mistake he had made during the day when she heard tires on the gravel approaching the house at what sounded like high speed.

It was a silent standing rule, that you called before you came up here and that no deliveries were to be made. No pizza, and no just showing up. It could get you shot at, or killed because Sam wasn't taking any chances with Andy and the baby.

Sam would have called a few minutes out, so Gail instinctively knew that it wasn't him and he was the only one scheduled to come up here.

When the sudden sound of the tires skidding over the gravel could be heard, Gail said "Someone's here" seconds before a hail of gunfire opened onto the house.

The sound of breaking glass made Andy startle.

She jerked awake to see sections of the windows to the left blow out and come flying into the room. The curtains billowed with the sudden intake of air, shards of glass falling onto the wooden floor.

The sound of gunfire was instantly recognized as Andy reacted by grabbing her gun out from under her pillow and sliding off the bed onto the ground doing her damnedest not to sprawl out stomach first.

Her hands met with sharp pieces of glass as did her knees as she felt the glass tear at her flesh.

Gail tried to take cover by diving into the kitchen, but she didn't make it that far before she felt the burning sting of a bullet as it hit her in the shoulder.

She was screaming in pain, words like gunshots being yelled out so that Nick would hear it down her dropped phone that lay resting on the floor too far away to retrieve risk free and unscathed.

The house was pulling apart, debris flying everywhere as Gail stayed flat on the floor trying to put pressure on her gunshot wound as the blood streamed out.

She stopped yelling at Nick and instead screamed Andy's name repeatedly as loud as she could over the sound of the automatic gunfire that relentlessly continued.

She'd be quiet for a split second, hoping that Andy would answer, but each time her calls were met with silence from Andy.

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	39. Too Late

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**Chapter 39-Too Late. **

Traci watched Sam fall apart as she tried calling Andy but didn't get an answer. He crumbled when Gail's phone went straight to voicemail. She knew that he could see that she wasn't getting her calls answered, she didn't need to tell him that there wasn't one.

Next Traci called Jerry and told him that Andy was in danger and that Elliot had spelled it out so clearly for Sam that they knew for a fact that the threat was real.

Sam was driving like a raging lunatic, she was sliding left and right on the seat as he took corners, her hands holding on to the handle above her head and her seat as she tried to hold herself still.

He was cutting across red lights and overtaking cars that were moving too slowly by crossing into the oncoming traffic lane, but she didn't feel like she was in any danger. Sam was a good driver.

For one second Traci tried to stand in his shoes and pretend that it was her with Jerry and Leo, the feelings she felt ripping through her heart so strongly that she pushed the idea out of her mind as soon as it came too light.

She couldn't even begin to imagine it, imagine how Sam felt right now.

They were half way across town when Jerry called her back, her face giving away her emotions as she feared the worst.

"'Lo". She said so quietly, she hoped that Jerry heard her.

Sam kept looking between her and the road as he waited for her to say something, her silence making him fear the worst.

Gail heard the vehicle outside pull away as soon as the automatic gunfire came to a deafening silence as quickly as it had began.

She knew that she had about three seconds to make a decision- head for the door and get a look at the car, or race upstairs and possibly find the worst sight waiting for her.

Of course, there wasn't really a choice too make; so she slid along the floor wincing in pain as she took a look around the house from out behind the kitchen counter.

The house was in tatters, but there was no-one in sight so Gail stammered to her feet; her blood loss resulting in a strong spell of dizziness that made her sit back down as soon as she was up off the floor, her hand clutching her bleeding shoulder.

Deciding to not stand up again, Gail crawled along the floor and only stopped when she reached the staircase that led upstairs to Andy's bedroom.

Reaching out for the wall Gail steadied herself and found her feet even though she wasn't really sure that her legs would carry her body weight up the staircase.

With her bloodstained hand tracing patterns on the wall Gail climbed the stairs trying to prepare herself for what she'd find.

"Okay". Traci said and hung up on Jerry. In between her answering and hanging up she had only said 'lo and okay making Sam feel the panic set in.

"Talk Nash" he yelled, the woman next to him jumping at his biting bark as it flew out of his mouth.

"They hit your house Sam".

Imagining hearing that and actually hearing it were worlds apart, Sam suddenly feeling like he was the only one left on the planet.

It felt like everything just stopped existing with those few words.

Like he died inside.

"Nash?" Came out of his mouth really brokenly, but he needed some kind of confirmation here, something to go on.

Something more to tell him that it was over.

"Sam I'm sorry, that's all they know. Gail was on the phone to Nick and there... There were shots fired. A lot. Nick um, he just heard her calling Andy and then the call cut out. They're on their way..."

This conversation was so much harder than Traci had ever imagined having.

Sam took a deep breath, then stepped on the gas a little more. There was no conformation that anything was over right now; there was no conformation yet that his wife and baby weren't still breathing. Right now, nothing else mattered.

Gail made it up the stairs without hitting the ground. Her hand had stayed braced on the wall as she tried to climb the stairs as quickly as she could.

When she reached the top stair, her feet planted themselves to the floor as she looked up and down the hallway at the torn apart wood and shattered glass that lined the floor.

Broken photo frames littered the hallway, a broken vase under the destroyed table that once held it.

Taking a deep breath Gail approached Andy's bedroom her body riveted with light tremors as her hand reached out for the door handle.

As she pushed it open, a light gust of wind blew over her; the movement from the door blowing back as the breeze that came in through shattered windows forced it back.

Andy's room was dark, shadows and silhouettes dancing around as Gail let go of the door and stepped into the room.

Her hand flew out and she hit the light switch to find that it still worked, the room suddenly flooded with bright light.

Gail blinked a few times as her eyes focused.

Lingering in the doorway Gail's eyes swept over Andy's bed to find it a mass of tosseled linen.

Her eyes moved from Andy's tattered bed to the floor as she stepped passed the end of the bed to find mass smears of blood across the wooden floor, clear signs that Andy was loosing a lot of blood as she slid across the floor.

Gail followed the trail to the bathroom, her hand reaching out for the wooden door that was riddled with holes.

Sam hit traffic racing towards his house and he was taking careless chances but when he realized it he slowed down to a safer speed although it was still over the limit.

He tried to fish his phone out of his pocket, but Nash's hand on his arm told him to stop.

"Sam?" She asked, wanting to know who he wanted too call.

"Oliver" came his dry, tense reply.

Traci dialed Oliver's number and mumbled a weak hello when he answered. His first words were "Sammy okay?".

"No" Traci mumbled before hitting the key to convert the phone to speaker.

Sam could hear a mass collection of sirens in the background, a distance away from Oliver- they hadn't made it too his house yet.

"Oliver, talk too me" Sam yelled in the direction of Nash's hand.

"Sammy... We don't know, we're ten minutes out. Where are you?".

"Fifteen to twenty, Oliver I need to know something..."

"Sammy as soon as we know, you'll know".

It was hard for Traci to watch Sam go through this, it was just as hard for Oliver to hear the pain and uncertainty in Sam's voice.

"Sammy I've got lead on this, I'm in the cruiser with Collins, we'll be the first ones on scene, and when I get there I swear I will call you okay, I just need you to keep a clear head and get home okay brother?".

Sam could tell that Oliver was worried that he'd be careless or reckless on the drive home, but he knew that Oliver understood; this was his family, his everything and he'd do what he had too in a bid to get home.

"I've got your back" Oliver added before the call cut out when Nash's phone died.

Great now her battery was flat, and his was probably too. That meant that he'd only find out what was happening when he got home.

Gail's hand froze on the door handle, her eyes raking over the blood smears that were on the bathroom floor tiles- the telltale signs that Andy's hands had been on the floor as she tried to scurry to safety.

Her head was spinning, her own blood loss making her dizzy as her body tried to compensate by ineffectively cutting off all unrequired bodily functions; consciousness being next.

Inching the door forwards, Gail saw the smears extend into hand prints, the crimson marring the floor in strong contrast to the beige floor tiles.

Sam turned onto the gravel that would lead to his house; the sharp flickering of red and blue lights in the distance lighting up the night air.

No-one had been in contact with him because they were unreachable, so he kept driving and praying.

The red lights outweighed the blue telling him that there were more hosemonkeys and medics in his front yard than there were squad cars from Fifteen. Somehow that seemed too unsettle him more.

Turning into the driveway Sam cursed the fact that they had ever moved out here in the first place- almost in the middle of nowhere with no neighbors and no help.

All the happy memories that were made here were tarnished with the ones that were being made in the present.

Sam noticed that wooden barricade stands had been placed to the side of the driveway just in front of the house but he paid no attention to them as he drove straight through them and yanked up the handbreak before leaving the truck to idle as the wood splintered and the barricades fell into a heap.

He didn't even bother changing gears to put the truck in park.

There wasn't a barricade that would stop him from going into his own house right now, even if he knew that they had only been put up to keep a section of the house and driveway open for an ambulance or the ME's vehicle.

Sam climbed out the truck, his eyes roaming over his front lawn as he tried to look for a familiar face in between the hordes of strangers that littered the property.

There were unfamiliar uniforms, hosemonkeys and even medics cluttering the air, two of the hosemonkeys noting his presence and moving closer with every intention to stop him from entering the house when he slammed the trucks door closed and made a beeline for what was left of his front door.

The hosemonkeys stepped between Sam and the front stairs, but he mowed through them as their weak hold on him wasn't enough to restrain him and hold him back.

Sam was vaguely aware of a voice yelling "It's his house" somewhere in the background, but he'd already made it over the remaining front door threshold by then.

Once inside he froze.

He had absolutely no idea where to go, upstairs, downstairs, out the back?

He didn't know where Andy and Peck had been when everything happened.

Looking up the stairs Sam noticed the bloody fingerprints that lined the wall on the right hand side, his brain screaming that they were Peck's because Andy was- IS left handed. They had to be hers.

The smears seemed to trail upstairs, so he ascended the flight two at a time passing more than one person that tried to stop him on the way up as they were coming down.

They too were shoved aside, Sam's need to find Andy making him more aggressive and stronger than he was on the average day.

Making it on too the landing upstairs, Sam looked up and down the hallway seeking some kind of silent guidance as to which direction to go in. It happened when the door to his bedroom opened and Oliver came out, and then just stood there staring at him.

"Sammy..." Oliver didn't have the chance to finish his sentence, Sam pushed him aside and made his way into the bedroom.

Within seconds his eyes cast over the room taking in smashed windows and torn curtains. His eyes roamed over to his shot up bed, a billow of feathers from the pillows lining the floor.

Sam stepped forwards and edged passed the end of the bed, his eyes meeting the crimson splotches and smears that had been slid across the floor right up to the bathroom door.

Taking the deepest breath that he had ever drawn, Sam let the breath steady his raging emotions as his hand streaked out and found the more holy than righteous bathroom door where it held on and time stopped.

The door was pushed closed, no real clear view inside the bathroom provided so Sam had no idea what lay on the other side.

Oliver had his hand on Sam's shoulder, his voice sounding far away as Sam's name fluttered from his lips.

Sam shrugged Oliver's hand off his shoulder, and tried to find the smallest amount of hope somewhere deep inside himself as he pushed the door open and waited for the sight inside the bathroom to invade his senses.

Andy was laying in the bath tub, her dark hair thrown carefully over the back where it hung down over the rim.

She looked so peaceful, so calm that Sam's heart took one final beat before stopping.

Peck was sitting on the floor, one side of her baby-blue shirt now a dark maroon. She had her back braced against the side of the bath tub, her eyes too closed as she found some kind of peace of her own.

Sam could see her paling skin that looked like fragile porcelain now from the amount of blood she had lost- the small pool next to her giving it away.

Sam stayed in the doorway, his gaze flowing back to Andy and the giant bath tub that had bloody fingerprints all over it.

Andy's head was cocked slightly to the side making Sam think that she had found a comfortable position when she lay down.

Her skin was pale too, all traces of her usual red hue gone, all signs of her healthy glow vanished. It was so heart wrenching to see all life having left her cheeks.

Sam felt the back of his eyes pickle with the sharp sting of warm tears, but it didn't even come close to how his heart felt being ripped to shreds because he was too late.

He was too blind to see what Sarah had been telling him, and it ended up costing him his family. Cost him everything he lived for.

Sam felt another hand on his shoulder, a smaller and softer one. He knew by her touch that it was Nash, and that she wanted him too move out of the doorway.

Whether she wanted to get into the bathroom, or just see inside he wasn't sure, but it wasn't something she should see.

So, he stood in the doorway, took hold of her hand still on his shoulder in one of his and tried to back her away from the door before she was scarred for the rest of her life by seeing what was in the room.

When Sam turned to face her, Nash had tears shining in her own eyes as she looked at him with her bottom lip trembling.

******Wow it felt weird to write a whole chapter without Andy in it!**

**Anyway, hope you'll leave another awesome review? And that you anxiously await the next chapter! **

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	40. When Looks Are Deceiving

**Hello again, thanks as always for all the awesome reviews and follows! You guys are amazing & the best in all fandoms!**

**Well done for getting us to Chapter 40!**

**Thanks to the regulars & kelly2727! **

**Special thanks to Wendy, Genie, Mandy, Carmi & everyone else on twitter & FB! **

**Biggest thank you to Tender Marion for requesting to translate this into French! It is up if you would like a link let me know! **

**Chapter- 40 When Looks are Deceiving. **

The sudden sound of wailing crashed through the air, a high pitched crying that had the world beneath Sam's feet fall away.

He turned back to the bathroom to see Andy lift a tiny bundle up closer as her head lifted up off the edge of the bath tub. It was something he wouldn't have seen standing in the doorway because he just couldn't bring himself to step closer.

In that moment Sam couldn't even breath.

Letting go of Nash's hand Sam stepped back into the bathroom, Peck's eyes focused on him as her face slipped into a huge smile. She was barely conscious, but she was fighting to stay awake.

"Andy?" Peck mumbled trying to get Andy's attention because she knew that she was soeley focused on the baby right now.

"She's okay" Andy said, sounding so tired.

"She?" Sam's voice finally made his presence known, Andy's head whipping up to look his way.

When she looked at Sam, she let her lips curl up into the tiniest of smiles before she just burst into tears and nodded.

Sam took tentative steps towards the tub, Peck scooting across the floor a little so that there was space for him to get closer.

Andy was still holding the wrapped up bundle to her chest.

Sam bent down as soon as he was next to the tub, Andy shifting the bundle a little closer so that he could see.

Her hands had been bandaged, but it didn't seem to phase her movements at all.

Behind them, medics came back into the room, ready to take their patients out of the house- after going to colect stretchers and a baby incubator- but Oliver stopped them. "Give them a minute, he just got home". The medics nodded, they understood. They knew that the house belonged to cops, and even though they often had degrading names for the other; they respected what the badges stood for, and the work they did.

"It's a girl?" Sam finally managed to say, his voice not willing to cooperate really well.

Andy nodded and tugged away the edge of the tiny blanket to reveal a small face covered with a mass of dark hair.

"She's okay? You're okay?".

Sam had gone in to shock.

He had expected the worst, and from what he had seen his nightmares had become a reality when he walked into the bathroom. But looks had been deceiving.

Andy had managed to climb into the bath tub, and it had probably saved their lives judging by the bullet holes that were in the tiles above her head and the chipes of tile fragments that clung to her hair and littered the bottom of the tub around her.

Andy's POV.

Seeing Sam's relief and watching him look at their daughter made everything better. It was like nothing else existed in that moment.

When the glass had started smashing and she heard the gunshots, she was so sure that her life was over, that this was how she was going to die.

When she slid off the bed and her hands and knees hit the floor, her brain had told her that she was stabbing herself on the shards of glass, that they were scattered everywhere but it didn't hurt. She felt no pain.

The only thing that she felt besides the fear of harm coming to her unborn child was the instinct to protect.

It kicked in so hard and fast, that as soon as she hit the floor she was moving. She had kept low and crawled along the floor into the bathroom before taking a chance and climbing into the bath tub and crouching down as she tried to shield her stomach with her hands.

Her desire to protect was equally matched by the sudden onslaught of maternal knowledge that seeped into her. It had been her biggest fear being pregnant- that she would be a bad mother.

She hadn't exactly had a great role model in that department so she was on her own with that one.

But the second that the threat was a reality, she knew what too do. She knew that she had to get into the tub and that she would crawl a hundred miles on her hands and knees through broken glass to keep her baby safe.

The need to protect was suddenly clearer as she thought about all the times that Sam had been overbearing, and over protective; it made sense because she understood how he felt, understood his need to achieve that goal no matter what got in the way.

She had been in the tub for what felt like forever when she heard the footsteps on the wooden floor as they changed and she heard squeaking across the bathroom tiles in the eery silnce that followed the gunshots when they finally just stopped.

Looking up, her hand swinging her gun that she suddenly remembered clutched in her hand towards the intruder Andy found Gail looking at her with red eyes and a pale face.

Just then a searing pain had pulled through her back, Andy's hand dropping the gun as it flew into the small space behind her to feel if she was bleeding. It didn't help, her hands were covered in blood so she really couldn't tell.

Gail came closer and dropped to her knees next to the tub, her hands flying out to Andy's face as she sought surety that Andy was really still there.

"You're okay! Where are you bleeding?" Gail's voice was so feint and so stressed that Andy thought it would snap. She couuld hear the tinge of pain in Gail's words too.

Andy waved her hands up at Gail, another searing pain pulling trough her.

"I need to check" Gail said as she nudged Andy to sit up so that she could check her back.

When Gail was done giving her the once over, Andy told her to sit down before she fell down, and then lay back in the bath tub herself.

She was exhausted.

Gail had gone quiet so Andy that tugged on a strand of her hair to gain her attention, Gail's head lulling to the side and away from Andy's hand in response.

"We should go" Andy said and sat up straight, another searing pain surging through her.

It didn't take them long to figure out that Andy was going in to labor right here, and that they wouldn't be going anywhere.

As the time passed, Gail did her best to try and comfort Andy who was in full panic mode because they were far away from getting any kind of help, and even though Gail had promised her that help would come Andy was worried that things between now and then would go horribly wrong. The baby wasn't due for another two weeks, and in a way Andy was starting to feel responsible for it coming early because she had stressed and panicked in a situation beyond her control.

Then Gail did the only thing that would ever change Andy's panic into soft emotion.

Gail hung over the side of the bath, took Andy's hand in hers and said "You've got this. There's no-one I'd rather do this with than you".

At first Andy didn't understand what Gail meant, but then her mind seemed to grasp the concept she was having this baby with Gail. She had so desperately wanted it to be Sam, or Traci- her best friend, but having Gail here was just as good as having one of the two missing people here.

Not how Andy had planned this going, but it would do. It would do perfectly.

Gail was awesome, she found an inner strength and stood up before walking away and coming back with towels, a baby blanket that escaped unscathed and a bucket of clean water.

Overcoming her own pain, Gail was with her every step of the way, she even beamed when she handed the baby to Andy and said "She looks just like you".

...

The medics made their presence in the room known as they moved to Sam's side, they couldn't wait any longer. Andy's thoughts drew too the present as she held the baby towards Sam who shook his head, Andy stifling a giggle at the sight of Sam's big hands next too something so small and precious.

"Sam she's a Swarek, she won't break". Sam shrugged before leaning closer and scooping the bundle up while the medics moved around him and went too attend to Andy. Peck had already been taken out, a worried Collins following in their footsteps.

"It suites you brother" Oliver said watching Sam closely. He was really happy that things had worked out so well for Sammy. He had tried to warn him that there was a new addition to the family but when Sam shut down he couldn't get his attention for long enough and hold it too tell him. Sam had anticipated the worst, the deceitful room lying to him as his eyes allowed misconceived images to tell his brain that everything he held dear was gone. It made Sam shut everything else in the world out, including Oliver at that moment. Not that he blamed Sam, the guy thought he'd just lost his family.

Sam cast Oliver a quick glance before looking back down at his daughter, the happiest man on the planet.

When Andy was loaded into an ambulance and Peck another, Sam handed the baby over to another medic who was with the baby medivac unit. They let him carry her out, just to let him bond whith the child he nearly didn't have. Sam didn't want to part with her, but knew that it was procedure, and safest for the baby considering that she was two weeks premature.

Then he was torn, ride with Andy, or ride with the baby.

Andy motioned him over once her IV was set up, and nodded towards the baby unit, "Go with her" Andy said. Sam kissed her on the forehead and climbed out of the ambulance Andy was in and stepped up into the one that would carry the baby to the hospital.

They arrived at the hospital first, so Sam stayed with the baby. Nash had gone with Andy and Peck had Collins with her, so one of them would let him know when they arrived.

After a while Nash had come to find him in the baby ICU where the baby would stay as a precaution until she was a bit stronger.

When they attached her to tubes and monitors and an IV, her tiny, pained wail was the worst to endure. It damn near ripped his heart out.

Nash led him back to Andy's room after telling him that she had cleaned up and was settled. She left him at the doorway and told him that she would see him tomorrow.

Sam found Andy propped up on her pillows looking tired, but still finding it in herself to smile.

"Hey". Sam said kissing her hello.

He gave her a quick once over and noticed the new heavy bandages that closed her hands completely. She must have pretty bad cuts if they sealed her hands up.

"You did good" Sam said sitting down on the edge of her bed. Words would never convey how proud he was of her right now.

"We did" she corrected still wearing a goofy grin. "Have you thought of a name yet?" Andy asked chewing on her lip. They had chosen lists and lists of possible names, but were still undecided.

Sam shook his head, he was sorry to say that naming his daughter had not been on his list of priorities today.

"I kinda have one, I just... It suites her".

Sam raised an eyebrow and cocked his head to the side waiting for her to fill him in on what she had decided on.

"But it's okay you know, if you want something else".

"What's the name?".

"Sarah?".

Sam's breath got caught in his throat when Andy said that. It had never once appeared on their lists.

"It's okay, we can chose another one. She's just such a little fighter Sam, and she was so good, she was so quiet. She just looks like a Sarah".

Sam smiled, he'd never really though about naming their baby Sarah, but now that Andy had her heart set on it he was not about to say no. It was a great honor to his sister.

"Okay, but how about this; Sarah Gail swarek?"

That was a total random thought and made Andy go really quiet. "Unless it's gotta be Traci?".

He knew that they had always said they would name one of their kids after each other, but Peck had been there with Andy and Sarah when she was born. He wanted to thank her in some way, for keeping them safe and having Andy's back, even though Andy going into labor had probably kept her alive.

"Traci said the same thing" Andy smiled.

"Sarah Gail" Sam repeated smiling, his life was now complete.

"Get some sleep, I'll be here".

"You need to go home and get..." Andy trailed off. Their home wasn't livable anymore.

"Jerry's letting me crash there, just get some sleep".

Sam moved off the bed and pulled a chair closer from the corner of the room.

Andy shifted around and got comfortable while Sam traced patterns up and down her bare arm.

It didn't take long before Andy drifted off to sleep, her face pulled into a really happy smile.

When Andy woke up Sam was there, in clean clothes so he had left.

In sudden fear her hand jumped to her stomach before she remembered what had happened.

"She's okay, I just left her. They'll bring her down for a little while just now". Sam could tell that she was scared the second that she regained consciousness

Andy relaxed and looked over at the cold breakfast tray before Sam stood up and said, "I've got it covered".

A while later he was back with food and coffee that would be way better than cold hospital food.

Andy took her time enjoying her breakfast, she was nearly done when the sound of wheels drew her attention. She looked up to find a nurse pushing a crib into her room, her face lighting up at knowing that she was about to see her daughter.

The nurse left them alone after telling them that they only had half an hour before she had to take the baby back to ICU.

Sam picked up his daughter and looked at her tiny features. She looked just like Andy, only her hair was a few shades darker.

The clearing of a throat sounded behind him, Sam looking over his shoulder to find Peck and Collins just outside the door.

Peck had a little more color to her face and looked better, even though Sam could tell that she was not all that thrilled about having to be pushed around in a wheelchair.

"Hey" Andy beamed when she saw Gail, Nick pushing her into the room when they received a warm welcome.

Sam gave Peck a look that Andy would never forget, one that displayed all his gratefulness and heartfelt gratitude that she had been Andy during a pretty tough time.

"I'd like you to meet Sarah Gail" Sam said when Nick stopped Gail a few feet away from him. He bent down a fraction and held his daughter out towards Peck. She had her arm in a sling so she wouldn't be able to hold the tiny bundle.

Gail sputtered as she choked when she heard what Sam said. "I'm sorry?" She asked disbelievingly.

Sam flashed her a dimpled grin and shrugged a little. He couldn't quite wrap his tongue around saying the words.

"You named her Gail?" Gail asked again shaking her head.

"Sam's way of saying thank you" Andy cleared up and explained. She wanted them to know who it came from, that it wasn't her.

"Room for one more?"

Andy looked up to find her dad in the doorway carrying a few bags, a huge bouquet of flowers and a mass of helium balloons.

"Oh Dad" Andy hadn't even given him any thought. He'd probably heard about them on the news and freaked out.

She looked from her dad to Sam who nodded, his way of reassuring her that he had called Tommy as soon as Andy was asleep and let him know that they were all okay, and that he was now a grandfather to a beautiful little girl.

After discarding the bags, setting the flowers down and letting the balloons drift up to the roof Tommy stepped closer and Sam handed Sarah over to her grandpa. Tommy's face held more pride than Sam had ever see, he was proud of his daughter for achieving this point in her life.

After a few minutes Tommy handed Sarah over to Andy who finally got to tug Sarah closer. Sam stood to the side, giving Tommy, Andy and Sarah some time together as Peck and Collins bid goodbye and left.

Watching Tommy's reaction to Sarah made Sam wonder how it would have been if his sister Sarah was still here, how she would languish in the moment. It was a sad thought, but it made him smile because he knew that wherever Sarah was, she was enjoying this moment almost as much as he was.

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	41. Holding On

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**Chapter 41- Holding On. **

Andy spent three days in hospital, Sarah being allowed to join her in her room rather than the pediatric ICU the day after she was formally named.

There had been constant traffic through the room, all their friend stopping by bearing gifts to welcome Sarah to the world and to finally meet her.

A large portion of everything in the house had been destroyed, including Sarah's new belongings, but every set of feet that came through the door brought her something new to replace what had been lost.

Sam and Traci had gotten Andy new toiletries and clothes too, a barrage of welcome gifts making their way into her room too.

Sam hadn't really had time to make new living arrangements for them, but Jerry had taken care of that the day after Sarah was born when he stopped by to meet her and held out Sam's house keys to him.

Sam had looked at him confused and Jerry had just said "We found a place and the movers stopped by this morning, so you just need to salvage your stuff and you're good to go" before he handed Sam the keys, patted him on the shoulder and walked into Andy's room. Sam had gone home to their house to get clean clothes, so he had not been around to Jerry's house even though Jerry had offered him a place to crash. He went to survey the remains of his house while forensics combed through it.

Sam was stunned.

Jerry and Nash had moved? In twenty-four hours?

Their house wasn't livable, Sam had gone to see the damage the next morning and it was a complete disaster.

That left them in a huge predicament that he really didn't see a solution too.

It also explained why Nash had left when he arrived at Andy's room.

Sam looked at the keys in his hand before he looked up to find Jerry taking Sarah from Andy. He really was a good guy.

After Jerry had left, Sam had told Andy that they were moving home and that he'd have it done before she was discharged. His words seemed to have such a calming effect on her. She had been seriously worried about where they would go when they left here, but once again those closest to them had lent a hand and stood by them when they needed a little bit of help.

The morning that Andy and Sarah were released from the hospital Sam had another surprise for Andy. He had gotten Lars, Alicia and Abigail home and they were waiting anxiously to meet Sarah and see Andy.

The DA had been in constant contact with Sam, after he had finally found a power point and charged his phone. She had Elliot's parole application revoked and had him moved to the maximum security phsyc ward at a mental institution out of state because of the risk he posed to the Swarek family.

The vehicle used to shoot up Sam's house had been found hours after the incident; Marco Sylvano a DOA after he lost control of the vehicle and it rolled down a straight stretch of empty road. The two John Doe's also found in the vehicle were declared dead on scene too.

A patrol car had stumbled on the overturned vehicle on the deserted road. It wasn't quite understood what happened, but it was assumed that Marco swerved out for something in the road judging by the break marks that the tires left. Only strange thing was; there was absolutely nothing to swerve out for.

Arriving home at their house Andy couldn't help but feel that things were finally like they were supposed to be.

Sam had taken Sarah out of her car seat and carried her in, Andy's face lighting up when she made it trough the door to find Lars, Abigail and Alicia waiting for them.

Of course Alicia was following Sam the second that she saw him carrying Sarah.

"You're okay" Andy breathed in relief at actually seeing them here, and safe. Sam had continuously told her that they were okay, but it wasn't the same as actually seeing them in person.

Andy gave Abigail a hug as soon as she was close enough, she had been worried about her. The girl was sweet and innocent, she wasn't cut out for life like this, life on the edge and after the close call she had been through with Marco, Andy knew that Abigail was scared.

Stepping back Andy looked down at Abigail's stomach. She had the faintest traces of a baby bump forming, Andy had felt it when she hugged her.

Andy smiled a truly happy smile, as Abigail nodded in answer to her silent question. Looks like they'd be adding another new addition to their family in a few months.

Lars gave her a hug next, a really tight one. They had grown close, especially after Sarah had died.

The age difference wasn't enough to be the mother/son kind of relationship that Lars had; had with Sarah, with Andy it was more like the brother/sister kind. And Andy wouldn't change it for the world.

"You did good" Lars whispered in Andy's ear before she poked him in the ribs and giggled out "So did you".

After Sam had shown Sarah off a little he went and set her down in the makeshift nursery that they had arranged for the time being.

He had spent a large portion of time attempting to clean up their destroyed house and it was a time consuming task that wasn't yielding results quick enough.

He hadn't been expecting any help, and was too proud to ask for anymore- everyone around them had already done so much.

Yesterday when he had been there, he heard cars pull up outside the house and he looked out the window to find Epstein waving at him eagerly. At that stage, Sam was ready to abandon the task of cleaning up and just going home too sleep.

"Rookies, this is not a test, it is not a task it is the first lesson you will learn about 'Backup'".

Sam heard Epstein's voice carry in from outside, his curiosity immediately peeked.

Sticking his head out the door Sam found several new uniforms standing on his front deck along with Epstein, Frank, Noelle and Collins.

"Backup- by definition to assist and provide a safety net for your partner, but at Fifteen we don't have one partner; we have Brothers".

Sam tried to hide his amusement at Epstein's speech, but the kid had the new rookies enthralled on his every word.

"Today, we are backup of a different kind. Today we're like a coat of fresh paint".

Epstein went on after that to hand out assignments to the rookies, and pairs of gloves. They had been tasked with various duties- sweeping up the broken glass, throwing the broken furniture out onto Sam's truck, taking anything that could be salvaged into the lounge. It was a huge relief to Sam to know that there was help to get the house sorted out.

By the time the sun was starting to set, most of the house had been cleared out and cleaned up leaving Sam feeling a huge amount of relief.

Once everything had been sorted out, the damage really didn't look as bad as Sam first thought.

There were various items that were salvageable although the house would need some serious repairs.

Abigail sat with Andy and Alicia fawned over Sarah when she woke up, Sam standing in the doorway counting his blessings as he watched his family interact so simply.

He'd been this close to losing everything he held close to him, everything that meant anything to him.

But he didn't.

"You okay?" Andy asked when she came to stand in front of him.

"Perfect" Sam said dropping a kiss on to her forehead before looking down at Sarah sleeping in her mothers arms.

In the days that followed they set out to get the house in order and Sam bonded with Sarah more than Andy had expected him too.

Watching him with her was unbelievable, Sam's softer side on full display for the world to see and not just her anymore.

He was doting, and Andy loved watching every minute of it.

She knew that she'd have a lifetime of watching it.

Sam would be at every piano recital, and school play. He'd learn to braid Sarah's long hair and spend weekends pushing her on the swing he'd build for her out in the back yard. He would buy her a pink bicycle and be the one to hold her up when he took the training wheels off, and he'd be the one interrogating any prospective dates that showed up at their front door.

"You okay?" Sam asked when he caught Andy watching him with Sarah.

"Yup. I um, is this going to be a one time thing?" Andy blurted out making Sam's eyebrows rise.

After all they had been through and what she had to go through to save their baby and herself she wanted to know if Sarah was going to be their only child?

Sarah was a week old, and Andy still had stitches in her hands, large band aids covering sections of her skin and she asked him that?

She was just incredible.

"I dunno, should it be?".

"When we blink, she'll be going to college, I don't want it to be just one".

"Then she won't be".

Sam set Sarah down in her crib and turned to face Andy, his arms slipping around her waist as as she leaned closer to say goodnight to their daughter.

"Thank you" Sam said kissing her hair.

"For?"

"Saving her, saving you. Saving me".

"Sam, it wasn't going to be any other way".

"I know, but it only turned out this way because you didn't give up".

"Why would I give up? I wasn't ready to go anywhere yet, and I know what she meant to you, there was no other option".

They stood in silence for a while, Sam leaning his chin on Andy's shoulder as he looked over her at Sarah.

"I'm giving up my badge" he whispered into her ear causing her to tense up completely.

"What? No!".

"Andy, I've been thinking about this for a while, and I want too".

Andy spun around, grabbed Sam's hand and pulled him out of Sarah's nursery; that by the way finally looked like a nursery.

"Don't you dare Sam, no way!".

"Andy, what if it's me next time? What if..."

"No okay. I get it, get why you want to give it up, but no. Please don't do this"

"I have responsibilities now Andy, I can't..."

"Sam". Andy held her hand up, her head drooping forward to hang as she waited for him to just be quiet.

When he finally was quiet, Andy looked up and spoke "Sam, this is us, it defines us, it's part of us. It's how we met, and it's you, don't give it up, please. I get that you blame yourself for Sarah, and what happened at our house, but that wasn't you. I'm scared everytime you walk out the door, I'm scared that you're never coming home, but you've taken a safer job and that's enough. I'm scared everytime I walk out the door too because what if it's me? What if I don't come home?"

Andy took a deep breath before continuing, "Look at Oliver, look at Trace, they do this if they can, we can. I'm a cops daughter Sam, and so is my daughter. It's in her blood, because of who we are and I don't want it to change, I don't want you to give up the one thing you are on your own because of a what if".

Sam was at a total loss for words.

"She'd be so proud of you" he mumbled. His sister Sarah would be so proud of Andy right now not only because of her strength but because she would do anything to protect what defined them, what made them who they were.

"She's proud of you too Sam".

That made Sam's heart flutter, but in a good way. Even though Sarah was gone, and his life had moved on he knew that she would be proud of him finally getting what she wanted for him, he had everything she didn't.

It was the only thing he truly wished would have been different.

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**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


	42. In The End

**Sadly, this is the last chapter. It takes a radical time jump, but it felt right. **

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**Thanks to everyone & kelly2727 for this awesome journey!**

**Chapter 42- In The End. **

Sam had never seen Andy look more beautiful than she did today; her face dusted lightly with makeup, and her grey hair hanging loose around her shoulders. The pale blue dress she had on suited her, and fitted perfectly.

Her lips were curved up slightly in the feint traces of a smile, her face carrying a look of utter bliss.

"Dad?". A voice whispered in his ear as a hand rested lightly on his shoulder.

Sam hugged the pale skin of the delicate hand between his shoulder and ear like he had done a million times over. It was just always something he had done when that hand rested on his shoulder.

His eyes were transfixed on Andy, they couldn't be pulled away unless he closed them to block her from view.

His mind flashed back to the night that he had first watched her sleep, handcuffed too his bed. That was a long, long time ago.

The memory spilled into a smile as it tugged his lips up.

Following that were a lifetime of memories, timid smiles; feisty words and the heartfelt moments that had made it all worth it.

Sam's hands moved too his tie, fiddling with it even though he knew that it was still perfect.

Sarah, his daughter made sure of that.

Sarah, her name was enough too break his heart.

Sarah his sister was long gone, but never forgotten.

"Sir?". Lars' voice sounded a little behind him making him remember that he wasn't alone.

Lars; the kid had become a good man, and had raised his family right. He had three kids, the youngest daughter named Samantha. The oldest was Alicia, and wasn't his, but somehow over the years, that's how they thought of her. The middle child was a little terrorist, um, boy named Michael, he too had just joined the academy recently.

Sam turned to smile at his daughter, she really looked just like Andy. She too was all grown up and married now. She met and married a good guy from the fire department when he sat with her for three hours while they tried to cut her out of her totaled car after she crashed into a stationery vehicle in the rain when she didn't see it in the dark after the driver abandoned it with no hazard lights on

Maurice had been off duty at the time, but his natural instincts had made him stop and stay with Sarah every step of the way to the hospital.

Yup, Sam's son in law was a hosemonkey, something Oliver constantly took pride in mocking.

Sarah had two kids of her own, two boys named Peter and Andre.

"Dad?" A second voice said in his ear, it was his youngest calling him.

"Yeah?" Sam said facing his son.

"You're drooling" Timothy joked at Sam's total and utter desertion of all logical thought. It was something that his children had become accostomed to seeing over the years.

"It's your mothers fault" Sam chuckled, Andy letting out a boisterous giggle as she stepped towards Sam.

"Ready?" She said as she held her hand out for Sam to take.

"Nope" Sam said. He really wasn't ready to let go.

Tonight was his retirement party, and he just hated parties, and being the centre of attention.

But most of all, he was going to miss being a cop even after he had spent a fair amount of time wanting to give his badge up to protect his family.

He had spent another thirty years on the force after he nearly lost Andy and Sarah, and it felt like he was losing a piece of his legacy.

"You're not regretting staying are you?". Andy asked thinking back to the conversation they had had years ago, the one that made him stay a cop.

"No, it's just time to do this" Sam's hand let go of Andy's as he opened her car door.

She had only grown more beautiful over the years, she had aged with grace.

"I have no regrets, not even one" Sam reassured her as she climbed into the car.

The kids were scattering to their cars, each of them having arrived at Sam and Andy's house to drive together.

They had stayed in Sam's old house and built on, extending the house over the years.

The house that Sarah had given them was too riddled with bad memories to live in.

They had decided to talk to Lars about it and asked him if he wanted to take it, but he too had declined.

So they were stuck with a house that no one wanted, a huge property wasted.

Well they were until Sam got a case involving a foster care centre that used the kids housed there to run drugs because they could claim no knowledge of it. When he closed the case, he also ended up closing the home leaving eighteen kids homeless, six staff members jobless and a gaping hole in his heart.

He had called the new ADA and told him that he wasn't happy with the justice system but that he had something for the kids- a solution.

He gave the state the house with Lars' blessing to turn into a privately owned foster care centre. That meant that they could use the house to foster the kids and Sam and Lars were still in ownership. Just as Sarah would have wanted.

It was perfect.

The house was named the Sarah Swarek Home but it soon became know as Sarah's. It was also the pet project of Fifteen and Sam's coworkers at Guns and Gangs when it became funded through the cops at both divisions as well as their private fund-raising charity of choice.

Five years after the home was started, they faced having it closed when the state cut funding and pulled out of their agreement with Sam and Lars. Andy had come to the rescue when she handed Sam a cheque for her entire inheritance. Tommy McNally had passed on to a better world three months before and Andy wasn't about to let the home crash and burn.

They had twenty-three kids living in the house and the barn than had been built into a second house.

Sam had gone to seek assistance from the state again, because he had no idea what to do, the only thing he was sure of is that these kids needed a home. Many had been abused and turned to drugs, they wouldn't survive if they were kicked back to the streets.

Andy had come with him to Child services that day, and they had been given the right to keep the home open because they had enough to see it through for a while.

Some of the adult carers that stayed in the home had even refused to take a paycheck when they knew that the state had cut funding.

Andy had also handed child services a list of names that she had gathered over what must have taken weeks. Each name on the list was of a person or a local business that pledged a monthly donation either in cash, or in clothes or food for the kids.

Sam was stunned.

Legal aid had stepped in again and made a deal with the state to meet what they needed by supplying the shortfall that they needed to keep going, and so the house was kept open.

Over the years many faces had come and gone through that house, some returning to give back in the form of an update about how their lives had turned out, or a donation to help the other kids that were currently in the home. Two of them had even come back as full time volunteers, one the house cook, who had a chef's degree, the other as a registered nurse. They both lived on the premises full time.

When Sarah was eighteen she made an astonishing statement at the dinner table one night.

"I don't want to be a cop".

Sam had burst out laughing and Andy had dropped her fork. It just came out of the blue, something only a McNally woman would do.

"So you want to do...?" Andy had asked after clearing her throat.

"I want to study child phsycology and financial management" Sarah had said.

That was a lot to take on.

"I want to work at Aunt Sarah's"

Sam and Andy and their kids had spent time at the home over the years, Sam doing minor repairs and his children having play dates. Andy would volunteer her time so that the care givers could have a break.

Mrs Wippet had recently passed away, she had been running the home for the last fifteen years and now they were waiting for the state to appoint a new head to the home.

"Sarah, that's a lot of responsibility" Sam had said trying to make her see reason.

"I know Dad, that's why I want to do this. Is like our legacy you know, and besides Timmy is too... You know, not like us, to do it". Timothy had kicked her shin under the table for that statement.

Sarah went to college in the fall and did exactly what she said she wanted too.

Sam built her a house of her own on the property the year after that with the promise that if she wanted it, the house would be standing there ready and waiting for her.

It had been a struggle to get her involved in the management of the house because she was an heir to the Swarek name, but Alicia had come up with the solution to that problem.

Technically they now owned shares in the property as stated in Sarah's will, so she had approached child services with a new deal- they'd pool their shares to Sarah, give them to her in return for her agreeing that they would be split between the Halloways and the Swareks should she die, and that the property may never be sold or the home closed down.

Child services was hesitant at first but agreed when Sarah signed the contract stating that she had to work there for a minimum of five years.

That seemed to convince them that she was in it for the long haul.

Over the years their children grew up, each of them showing signs of some McNally determination, and courage and some moments where they were just like a Swarek when they were stubborn or headstrong. Even with thheir grandkids their bloodlines were clearly visible. And it was a reminder everytime Sam looked at Peter or Andre of just how much they had to get through to get to now.

Pulled back to the present Sam climbed into the car and started the ignition, life was so different from how he had envisioned it, but he wouldn't want anything to be different.

"You sure about this?" Andy asked stabbing her finger into his ribs.

"Totally". Sam replied.

It was Oliver's idea that they give Sam a retirement part, just like Sam and Jerry had done for him when he retired three years ago.

Sam had applied for a position at Fifteen the day after his talk to Andy about giving his badge up, and Frank was all to happy to find one for him.

He took leave until Andy's maternity leave was done and then drove her to work that day. He parked the truck and she had said goodbye before leaving him sitting in the parking lot.

When he thought that he had given her enough time to get into the locker room to change, Sam slipped inside and waited in Frank's office until parade stared.

Frank had welcomed Andy back by saying "As a welcome back gift, we got you something".

Sam was standing in the doorway right on cue when she looked around the room and frowned. "What did you get me Sir?" She had asked a little confused.

"We got your Swarek back" Frank said nodding towards the doorway.

Sam had never seen her blush as much as she did in that moment, having to hear him referred to as 'Her Swarek'.

"Thank you Sir!" Andy had giggled out before sauntering over to Sam and whispering "Hey _Partner_" in his ear.

"Hi" had been his subtle reply.

She was so happy in that moment.

Looking over at her now, Sam saw the familiar signs of her happiness wash out over her face. She still felt the same, and he still wouldn't change it for the world.

**The End. **

******* Thanks again for spending time with me here! Hope you'll leave one last review before moving on to my new one?**

**Have an awesome day!**

**Jelly Bean Jenna©**


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